Wednesday, October 5

Masquerade

I'm so happy, I'm so at peace, I'm so independant, I'm so unaffected yadda yadda yadda...enough of that, take off your mask now...take a good look at yourself in the mirror. Are you all that you claim to be? Are you the identical twin of your mask or were you fooling yourself and everyone else right along? What do you look like? Nowhere close to what you think you are right? I know it my friend.

How many of us pretend to be what we are really not? How many of us wear masks to fool our loved-ones when inside we are really someone else?I understand some people wear masks just to be happy for the sake of their family and friends. My friend wore a pretty mask months before he committed suicide. He was happy as anything and we didn't see any hint of suicidal thoughts. That's a tragic situation and I forgive him anyways. Another person I know 'acts' like she has never been wrong in her life when actually that's her biggest mistake. That's an egoistic situation and I still forgive her too. I know that all of us have atleast a tad bit of pretence in us...otherwise we can't be human. But what bothers me are people who wear masks to suit the situation, to fool the world. People who go around as if nothing affects them, as if they live in a perfect world, as if nothing can go wrong for them, as if everyone else is wrong and as if people who are genuinely emotional are idiots - only because they don't want to show how scared they are to admit the truth. How deceitful and weak is that?

I bet it is hard to find an everlasting mask and that's why such people never fail to fail at the end of it all. All masks fall off at some stage and along with it dies your little fairy-tale world. But you know what, it doesnt really affect me...it is your soul that dwells upon masks that will be lost one day. Don't come back crying for I don't have a shoulder that can stand your fake tears anymore. I have run out of praise for your lies...I have forgotten your features...I have no smiles for the painted faces...I don't want to waste my emotions on watercolors and plastic...I'm tired of visiting your sand castles...I'm too real to welcome your camouflage.


I know you take your mask off every night and sit in a corner crying your lungs out. Only because you are too afraid of what you have become. Too afraid that your real self won't be able to match your mask. Too disappointed by the mirage that you are. Too much of a pretence that you don't seem to want to know the pathway to reality...because it's too long a path, and embedded with rejection, tears, humiliation and smirks. Not that you aren't getting any right now (smirk!). But that path is what will lead you to your real self...that is the path that will set you free...that is the path where no masks need to be worn. Through fear and rejection and what-not, you will never be fooling yourself again...you will never have to hide again and there will be no confusions about what part to play and when. For you will remain who you are, you wont wear out like the masks. That way when you lose, you will lose gracefully. And if you win, you will win truthfully. So take it off, welcome to the ugly world and 'face' your fears and challenges. Don't hide behind a mask, for faking anything is the worst crime ever.

161 Cranium Signets:

SaffronSaris said...

I'm 1st!! muahaha!

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

I was replying to ur last comment on ma blog

2ndddddddddddddddddd

SaffronSaris said...

It is more than a mask that we put on, but a whole personality.
At home, you gotta play the role of a father/mother/son/daughter. When you are with friends, you could be adopting another personality. And at work, perhaps you might be a laid-bak person, but the company culture is such that you gotta play the role of an aggressive( in the sense of completing your targets and achieving your KPIs) employee.
Such is the complexity of social beings and cannot be easily understood, I think.

Unknown said...

Will you ppl lemme be first for once?? grrrrrrrr

me third :(

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

Yes...
Its true..people wear masks..
I too do the same...but I cant hold for long..or maybe Im not good in that. Everything becomes clear when I interact with anyone around me. People who are close to me can very well penetrate tthru the mask and tell me what's going on inside the real z000nie.

But yeah, I've seen people who make good use of these masks for there benefit. Infact, there are few people in ma team right now...and I wonder how they do it.

Awesome one K000kie.
Hugzz

Keshi said...

Talking abt Masks, I have to make a very IMPORTANT announcement. Please read:


There's this ANONYMOUS mask wearer going around faking my ID...he has cloned my entire profile info, pic etc so that when he comments, it looks exactly like it's coming from me.

The way to check the authenticity of my ID is to click on the link of the comment and it will take you to the commentor's profile page. And if it's really from me it will show the blog # as:

http://www.blogger.com/profile/4726142

NOTE: profile 4726142


Any other address will be that fake mask wearer's :)

Thanks!
Keshi.

Keshi said...

Safrron congratts being first :)


Yes it blends with the personalities too...but Im not talking really abt the roles we play...it's more about how fake some people are...it's more abt Pretence...

But putting up different personalities to suit the situation is good for ya...that comes naturally from within...that's alright. But pretending to be someone u r not, is really foolish.

Thanks :)
Keshi.

firacub said...

Yoo hoo... mez in top 10...

Kiss muh dirt 000nies..... hahahaha... Ahem ahem... now back to da post..


Peace,
Firacub.

Keshi said...

aww NV u r still somewhere at the top nah :) Hows ya today?



z000nie yess loved-ones usually can penetrate thru that mask and know exactly the act u put up...but some loved-ones dun have that skill...

**But yeah, I've seen people who make good use of these masks for there benefit

that's so true...some ppl fake it just to get up the company ladder but have u noticed that such ppl always I mean always fall apart at some stage...?

Thanks!
Keshi.

firacub said...

n ya before I comment....

Why r u feeling so insecure about the one who is faking your ID??

We KNOW when the real Keshi comments!!!!!! :))))))


Peace,
Firacub.
P.S: U r just letting that sucker take control babes... ;)

Unknown said...

I wear a mask when Im upset or depressed. However, I don't see it as a crime or it even being phony. I would rather wear that mask then see my family and friends being worried bout me. In the end, your loved ones know when you are depressed so its that big of a deal.

On the other hand, if someone wears a mask to use people or harm others I think its just morally wrong.

I agree with z000nie, while working and competing with so many different people you will come across a few who change their personatlities according to their convinience.

Tarun said...

Muhaa haaa....scary....I am scared......funny....lol....confused?

firacub said...

n ya maybe this may help ya..

"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."

Peace,
Firacub.

firacub said...

hmmm a good post Keshi..

Made me think about the masks I use.. Part of my life and my dual personality. Though I use them to not fool or harm anyone but its a neccesity for me at the moment. A very dangerous task Keshi... the stakes for me are very high..

And to sum it all up...

"Who knows what true loneliness is -- not the conventional word, but the naked terror? To the lonely themselves it wears a mask. The most miserable outcast hugs some memory or some illusion. Now and then a fatal conjunction of events may lift the veil for an instant. For an instant only. No human being could bear a steady view of moral solitude without going mad."


Peace,
Firacub.

uttara said...

phewwwwwww....mez late ..

muaaahhhh

mermaid...:)

Anonymous said...

Fantastic post!!! *** welcome to the ugly world and 'face' your fears and challenges. Don't hide behind a mask, for faking anything is the worst crime ever***u r damn right, thats why i always say fear and pain are my best friends, they never desert me, always bring the best out of me.
Good day keshi!!!!

PuNeEt said...

b4 my ranking becomes somewhere post 50 or 100 let me dropin and say a
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

how r u sweetiiii

hugggzzzzzzz

will be back

take care
Cheers

uttara said...

keshi baby ....

most of them do .. it may be anyone for that matter ... ur mom / sis/ ur close friendz, anybody ..

it may be u too ..

but yes ur emotions have to be genuine coz no one will respect u then .. as u said ur friend Another person I know 'acts' like she has never been wrong in her life when actually that's her biggest mistake

u may forgive anyone .. yes thats in me .. forgive n forget( not all the time tho ;) ) ...

even after forgiving ur attitude towards that person does change

i do carry a mask .. yes wen am sad i dont show it off very often .. its only my close frndz can read beyond the mask ...or even say that am sad listening to my voice .. very few ...

my mom and my aunt yes they both can read my mind ..

yes when am happy .. dont ask .. :)))

it depends ..sometime i agree with people who wear a mask ..depending on the situation

but those who feel the r right.. that is stupidity .. coz to "err is human"

yeh the person who is masking u doent have the gutts to face u .. tahts wat i will say .. he/ she is a scared personality ...

u tc

uttara

--pearl-- said...

u goin sumwher?read dat thingie on nv's blog wishin u a safe trip..or uve already come back?

if u havent yet left:haf a safe journey n haf lotsa fun:) tc miss ya.

Keshi said...

Fira :)

**Why r u feeling so insecure about the one who is faking your ID

no insecure...just that some ppl got fooled by his mask...so it's not fair by them...so I put up that comment to they know that he also comments exactly like me :) No Im never affected by such dumb people by my friends need to know.


**"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."

awww nice one...but sometimes unreceived Love can make u wear masks forever...though ur dying within...


**Though I use them to not fool or harm anyone but its a neccesity for me at the moment.

yes I think it's ok to use masks as a necessity but not to fool ppl...



**The most miserable outcast hugs some memory or some illusion.

I luv that line...



* No human being could bear a steady view of moral solitude without going mad

so brilliantly put...where did u get this from?


Thanks Fira!
Keshi.

Keshi said...

Nv hugggggz!

**I wear a mask when Im upset or depressed. However, I don't see it as a crime or it even being phony.

Thats true...I do too..but thats only to be happy for my family and friends...eventually they do get to know...but with opinions and feelings abt something, Im too damn honest...I dun fool ppl with showbiz...

Thanks buddy...
Keshi.

Keshi said...

Uttara huggggggggz!

Yes I agree that we have to wear em to get through some unpleasant moments...but we should never wear them to fool ppl...

Hows ya today mermaid?

Keshi-wearing-a-watery-mask :)

firacub said...

Hey keshu...

***awww nice one...but sometimes unreceived Love can make u wear masks forever...though ur dying within...

Ahem.. Ahem.. Did muh mail ring any bells... :))))


Peace,
Firacub.

Keshi said...

Goodday South!

**i always say fear and pain are my best friends, they never desert me, always bring the best out of me

yes spot on! U must face it...no point acting like ur unaffected by it when deep down u really r...




awww Tarun u got scared by the masks :) I too am scared of the ppl who wear masks...they r so fake...there's nothing I fear than being fake like they r...




Pearly yep Im on holzz soon...within Aus...thanks so much for the good wishes...I miss ur posts :(


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Fira yess :) I agree...but I dun wear such a mask..I did for a while..when I broke up...now it's thrown to the junk...

Keshi.

uttara said...

this mermaid is happy talking to my co mermaid ( masked one tho )

huggy huggy .. bebes ... i feel good when i talk with u :))

ok not masking ...;)

muuaahhhhh

Keshi said...

Uttara ur talking to ur mask? cool! Tell ur mask to always stay at the back somewhere hehe...

Keshi.

uttara said...

keshi ...
u said Keshi-wearing-a-watery-mask :)

so its u hun ..
phew .. duhh u r ..loll

kidding ok ...

hugggzzzzzzzzzzz
mega hugggzzz

Sonia said...

i'm pretty bad at that.
anything i feel is shown on my face. everyone always laughs at me and my expressions. not just my friends, everyone can always make out what i'm feeling. which is REALLY bad! i wish i cud put on a mask sometimes.

Keshi said...

lol Uttara sometimes I wear masks too but not to fool ppl...to keep my family/friends happy...:)



Sonzzz awww ur a bit like me then...I'm very emotional that they cant even hide...they just sprout all over my face...Im a very sensitive person...r u too?


Keshi.

uttara said...

choo chweet huny ..

u made my day .. tho am too sleepy ;)

ur mermaid ...;)

btw wer is z000nie pie .. do we have to come up with another lost n found stuff ...;)

uttara said...

keshu wanna touch 200 comments on poo's blog ;)

he is gonna killme now...lollz

Anonymous said...

***no point acting like ur unaffected by it when deep down u really r...***after a certain level one does gets immuned to it and we dont seem to get affected by it much.

Unknown said...

is this a chat site now??

Keshi said...

Uttara Im at Puneet's blog lol!




lol NV nah why u sound so J? Hugggggz!




South yes...after a while u get immune to everything...I dun like that phase though...it feels like u dun have any feelings left...


Keshi.

Anonymous said...

***it feels like u dun have any feelings left...*** its better that way rather than having feelings which makes us vulnerable and easy to target.

Vinz said...

Keshi,

You stole one of topic which was lingering around my mind for such a long time.

Hey,i was just kidding.Cheers t you...I would rate this one as one of the best write up of yours recently...

No comments on this..But i hate masks..Wearing all possible masks,now i sometimes gets confused who am I?I cant recall my maskless face..i really hate masks..But ..have to wear..

uttara said...

if he comes to know .. i'm gonna be killed ...

hehehehe;)

u need to asve me my lord ..hehehehe

he will take me away from the water
lollzz

mermaid

Keshi said...

South yess I find that better too...but only sometimes...cos I want to go back to 'feeling'...



Vinu :) Thanks!
And I admire ur honesty...that u say u wear masks...but I know that u dun fool ppl...



awww Mermaid will never be takne out of the water...dun worry I'll save ya :)


Keshi.

uttara said...

yeppieeeee

mez dancing in the water
keshi is there to save me
keshi is there to save me
keshi is there to save me

yehyeh ...
hugzzzzzzzzz
mermaid ...

Anonymous said...

Best of luck then my friend...:)Fact of the matter is nobody can stay away from that for too long, but i'll try and fend it as long as i can, coz i already have too many adversaries to deal with...winks!

Keshi said...

hehe Uttara :)


South yes...nobody can stay away from it for too long...the truth is that when the pain is numb it's more painful...cos u dun seem to live nomore..just exist...is that a mask we wear too or is that the real self...cos some ppl say u can be happy if u try...
hey take care South and do let me know how u r progressing...

Keshi.

strawy said...

oooooooooo masks ,damnnn let me confess now .....
i wear masks too , sob sob , but no no noooo ,me never harm any 1,its just not to show my dark side ... m too scared...maybe thats y i wear mask...

***I understand some people wear masks just to be happy for the sake of their family and friends.**

maybe i m in this category,i just want every 1 to be happy,it dosent mean i m faking or fooling them , its just i dont want them to c my sad face n worry or be sad , is it bad ?
i think this mask wearing has become a part of our life ,every 1 ,somewhere,somehow wear masks everyday...

hugsss keshuu,so real post ...love ya sweety....take care ...miss u re


st000nie

tulipspeaks said...

at least i reached here before it hits 50th mark!

have i worn mask before this? YES..
am i wearing one now? NO..

guess it is always crystal clear whenever i got any problems and even tiny conflict inside me..i'm very poor in hiding my realself, my real feelings..sometimes it does favour for me..but sometimes it works the other way around..*sigghh

=am000nie=

De.vile said...

Whatever, mask or no mask, ugly world always there. Its just how ugly you are that makes the mask important.

Brood Mode said...

awesome post

"All masks fall off at some stage and along with it dies your little fairy-tale world"

so very true, made think

AmitKen said...

pretending is human, that perhaps happens out of guilt, or may be out of fear.

but pretending differently to different situations and occasions is bad. I hate such opportunist people who can be sad or happy or appreciative based on what suits them best at that time.

Jim said...

Shit!
the early worm gets the bird




.

Jim said...

Life is a masquerade
a love like ours cud never really be




my fav song of the good old days

Jim said...

Whatever, mask or no mask, ugly world always there. Its just how ugly you are that makes the mask important


trust De Vile to make a radical comment like dis

but believe u me
De Vile is stunningly beautiful all over

esp on the butt like Jen -Lo

messys musings said...

masks... who doesnt wear them???... we behave differently with different people... all of us wear masks... i wear a different mask for my family... a diff one for my hubby... a diff one for my friends.... but yes there r certain features that r common... the basic characteristics r common...

but there r some people who wear radically different masks with different people... thats where they go wrong... thats where they falter...

but i guess for me my basic personality will b the same... even though i might react differently with different people... hmmm so i m thinking wat sort of a mask i wear for my 00nies???

lol k00kie u tell me wat sort of a mask u see on my face :D... heheh... wait i'll chk the mirror n see if u r guessing rite...

*m00nie runs to the mirror to chk her mask...

Pele said...

"Only because you are too afraid of what you have become."
Poignant. Loved the post. The idea/concept is quite close to my heart - oft thought about and I keep ranting.

But I think contemporary identity is all about fashioning ourselves (as propounded by British historian, Greenblatt)...And then we end up being what we are not. We end up in a vicious cycle whereby we tend to lose track of our 'real' self (if there is any!)...

Just wondering... :)
Pele

Pele said...

Oops, forgot to mention, I loved the first pix...subtly intense. ;)
pele

Anbu said...

chalo.... 55th isnt bad....

Great post again... Ur posts r soooo coherent and flowing ... Do consider writing a book some day...

People showing genuine feelings are respected all around and still we continue to wear masks... Reasons could be:
1. Fear of rejection or failure - Short sighted view and u r plotting ur failure in long term coz u have stopped learning.
2. Ego or Fame - Some believe perfect ppl are more popular. Believe me, genuine ppl are more respected and popular than those acting like they r perfect.
3. For happiness of loved ones - Showing ur true feelings to them will make them happier coz they r contended that they know whatz up with u.
4. Work - This is reasonable. To get things done, a quiet soft guy may act as a tough Boss. Thats his work and work is worship. So, most acceptable mask.
5. To suit situation - Worst kinda mask. Easily recognised by all.

Its very difficult to clean ur face after wearing mask for so many years. But its never late.

-Poison- said...

i wear a perpetual mask...its needed for getting along in human society...i think of it as a necessity...a sort of barrier, which protects my privacy..

Keshi said...

st000nie awwww huggggz!

**its just not to show my dark side


I do that often...but it aint folling anyone....it's to keep my family and friends not worried abt me...to make it easier for them...to be happy even if Im not...that's perfectly alright st000nie...u aint faming anything there...u r being too considerate abt ur family and friends. This post is abt ppl who are opportunists...who wear masks to suit the situation and to suit their moods...that's fooling ppl...


And u know, though I wear my happy mask when Im sad deep down, even that mask falls off eventually...wont last too long cos I'm too sensitive and every bit of pain shows up sooner or later...

take care girl and thanks, hugggz!
Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww Amu yes I cant wear it for too long..I somehow fail but most of the masks I wear are to keep everyone happy...not to make a mockery out of anyone's feelings.




Chikka heyy muah long time!

**Its just how ugly you are that makes the mask important.

wow what a brilliant way to express it...yes if u own an ugly heart, u would have to cover up alot of things too...




Hey Broody thanks! :)



Amitken helloo...
U r absolutely right! As I said in this post too pretending is human and it happens out of fear and guilt too. But to pretend differently in situations to suit one's self is really mean and wrong.




m000nie aww soo true...
we behave differently with different ppl...but still our basic personality remains...that's a genuine person...but to behave with different personalities with different ppl is when the problem arises. U raised a great point there m000nie, as usual.

awwwww ur checking in the mirror lol so sweet! u dun wear any mask to us 000nies...u r truly beautiful in and out and u posess a beautiful heart...like devile stated, u dun need a mask :) hugggggz!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Pele thanks :)

**And then we end up being what we are not. We end up in a vicious cycle whereby we tend to lose track of our 'real' self

so true! those are golden words. I really wonder these days if there's any person out there who knows his/her real identity 100%...

yep I like that first picture too..it speaks a thousand words...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Anbu WC hows ya :)

**People showing genuine feelings are respected all around

so true..and today's ppl pretend alot just to get attention and affection...they need to shed their masks b4 the fall apart in sheer tragedy...

U pointed out some great reasons why ppl wear masks...very well analysed.
Fear, guilt, ego driven masks are almost everywhere and we should work on wearing them less and less.

Masks that we wear for others' happiness is the most common and I believe there's nothing wrong with that - if it helps u and them to carry on.

Work related masks are for our own career goals etc and may be good for u if u dont fool ppl ard.

The last mask which is situational is the worst - u r right! Have u met ppl who show a different face to different ppl and in different situations...very confusing nah. And then there are ppl who wear onebig egoistic mask all the time, everywhere they go...the tough mask that don't even have an expression...I hate ppl without expressions...they r like walls.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Poison hey we all wear masks...no doubt abt it...and it helps us protect our privacy, build out careers, help survive in society etc...but Im sure u maintain ur basic personality right along...there are some others who don't do that...they r like the chamaeleons change colors for every situation to suit their mood and needs...those r the scary masks...


Keshi.

DLAK said...

Holy shit, someone fucked you over big time, chill out sister, the monkeys coudlnt continue if they faced reality. Let em be.

uttara said...

keshu babes .. r u ok???

mail me ...bye:))
hugzzz sweety
uttara

che sara sara said...

me first time here
nice read...nice post

Keshi said...

DLAK :) thanks!
I believe they can continue with life only if they take off their heavily dirty masks...dun u think so?



Ahaan thanks mate!
I know exactly what u mean...I do that too...I mean hide my feelings to make my family happy...I dun want them to be sad thinking how sad I am...that's perfectly alright...it's not fooling or taking anyone for a ride...atleats I dun think so. But here I am talking abt ppl who use masks to suit situations and their moods...I cant stand such ppl...cos they confuse everyone and it's not fair by us...




Uttara Im fine lol why? awww it's only 9:50pm right now...hey I gtg...mum's calling...catch u tomorrow :) Huggggggz!

Keshi.

Pele said...

"I hate ppl without expressions...they r like walls."

Me too Keshi. Glad I found someone who feels the same! :) Liked the line. Very interestingly put. 'Like walls' - nice one.

P

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

That was too touching Keshi...and i know am not in a condition to comment....i really am not.....i dont wanna spill the truth out abt maself!!

But the post is quite true and close to reality. I think tht says it all.

You wouldnt know when am gone baby, you wouldnt know when am gone........

OMG...i missed ma lectureeeeeee! cya

Justin Thyme said...

Great post Kesh - as always, extremely thought provoking and insightful!!!

I think the most dangerous mask we were is the one worn for ourselves, to hide things about ourselves that we don't like or don't want to face.

Wearing any kind of mask can be quite dangerous, not only because it is not representative of the person we truly are but because we delude ourselves into believing the mask is who we are.

tulipspeaks said...

keshi,
I somehow fail but most of the masks I wear are to keep everyone happy...not to make a mockery out of anyone's feelings.

hmm..is that an hidden msg to someone out there?

=am000nie=

Invincible said...

'face off'

Jim said...

i been feeling blue lately
my silver wedding anniversary didnt go the way
i wanted it to happen


but then i looked through my old posts

and i found dis
http://imnutsincapstoooo.blogspot.com/2005/03/wat-makes-dis-world-beautiful.html

PuNeEt said...

Awesome Post dear…
The typical Keshi’s trade mark…

I would love to keep a back up of all ur post… so that when in life I’m confused and running from myself… I can browse thru them and get the confidence of facing the challenges… and challenge them… “Come on I’m ready… take on me”


How many of us pretend to be what we are really not?
I do in my professional life… coz my straight forwardness would not be appreciated…
I do in my interviews coz I’ve to earn my living… but when it comes to telling about me I never mask…
I do when I meet a stranger… and before he/she becomes a friend… coz the person should be worth knowing the real Puneet…
I do when I’m dealing with someone whose existence doesn’t make a difference in my life…
But I don’t do when it comes to my friendzzz… n my family
Take me or leave me… I give a damn

How many of us wear masks to fool our loved-ones when inside we are really someone else?
Not me atleast… I do tell lies but telling lies means hiding a fact… whereas masking means hiding ur belief… hiding ur own self…
If someone doesn’t accept me the way I’m… I don’t need that person… coz I can never be happy with him/her…


All masks fall off at some stage and along with it dies your little fairy-tale world.
That’s so true… Masking can never help in a long term relationship… be it with anyone

Don't hide behind a mask
It’s not just about hiding… it’s also about checking the other person…
For example a lot of my friends when they didn’t knew me thought that I’m a very arrogant n snobbish… the moment a rapport got developed… they found me one of the sweetest person… and this what I’ve heard from a lot of my friends…

What will happen if u’ll keep sweets in open… flies would attack first… u need to protect them from flies… so that one who has the worth takes the real thing…
But ofcourse… if we will never take out the sweets out of protection… they will get spoiled there itself…

Howwwzzzz that…. ;-)

I can’t read ur post in hurry…
I adore ur writing… n the way u think…
It’s just awesome

Take Care
Cheers

PS: Again my 1st comment got ignored... Hope ur not masking that u like me... else i'll commit a e-sucide
:-(

Michelle said...

umm...dunno but mosta da time very few ppl can say if m really sad....cuz i dun show it

:) said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
:) said...

wow masks.. yes thats true we all
wear a mask.. but the point is whts the purpose behind that.. well i do too.. as for ma frds n family me dwn to earth.. always chirpy smiling..its is me in real.. but at wrk me carry a good attitude.. no its not bad kinda .. but yes its a mask..
n smtimes whn me crying here n at the same time get a call frm mom or bro ..thn i put a mask of happiness in between teary eyes... not bcoz i wanna fool thm but bcoz i care for thm n i dont want them to worry about me..
but yes i detest ppl whn they use it for fooling others like saying.. senti senti stuff while in real they just making fun of their feelings..

hugggzzz gorgeous ..cool post

Unknown said...

In everyday life,we mask ourselves to be better understood, better treated and easier to deal with. We try to hide our flaws with plaster and duct tape in hopes that we will not be seen as "our" real self.

We all have insecurities, and we cope with them by acting a certain way around certain people. Our masks are safety nets around our true personalities so that every time we are not accepted, we can blame the mask and not ourselves. We perpetually reinvent ourselves so that social interaction can become easier.

I would find it a breath of fresh air to know that some people in the world are brave enough to dive into the deep end and be themselves. Wotsayyou?

Autumn Storm said...

Fabulous choice of subject - very interesting!
Guilty as charged. I wear a mask in the outside world and I wear it in front of everyone (here I am me) - in the outside world I'm tough as nails, nothing gets me down, no problem is too big and there is nothing I cannot do - which is how I live, and then I just vent, worry and moan in the privacy of blogland ;-)

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

OMG! I was talking to someone about the exact same thing last night!!

Unknown said...

it's too cool post n how u protrayed is awesome

Mask...... i cannot be myself at the very first moment of meeting some new faces i pretend to be very gentle which i'm desperately not i hate to do so but as i can't change myself compeletly i have to put a mask in a coercion
but after two three days...as they become familiar with me.....then the things which shows what i'm.... is not cover by any such a mask they can easily read my face n i too don't hate to put a mask coz my mask was not for a bad intentions thats only for them to accept me easily
many time we do put mask n believe me we have to as we r social living being... family n society means a lot to us so mask of kind,gentle over the face of anger,fury is essential at many time coz as a human being this evil things like jealousy,anger,fury reside in us in a little amount and sometime we become unable to cope with them we need to hide them
sometime we have to put mask on our sad emotions to peered on the happiness of our nearest ones

i do hate those plp who cover their whole life with the mask n pretend to be very good with a real evil heart inside..... n we have to tolerate them its such a irritating situation when plp hide their identity n pull other legs

"your life is yours so live life being yourself........ don't pretend to be that one which u are not" if plp become far more capable to understand this....then world wud be better place to live in....

okay sweety
good night
luv u

Arm Pitt said...

well written. so did you figure, whos wearing your mask and fooling around?

Prakash said...

hi keshi....
i was shocked to hear about the fake blogger ......
As umentioned every single human in this universe do that, it is fine as long as ur doing it for a good purpose....i hate people who change thier caring and loving mask to a culprit when ever the opp knocks the door....
my biggest problem is even if i knew..i cant help thinking they have changed for good when they are wearing a mask of caring,....always they will trick me...may be i am dumb but again i would be dumb and tricked every single time by those than mistakenly hurt someone by blaming someone who isnt....
Sorry i could not pop in as i wish as i am bit busy these days...
have good one
TC
Prakash

sittingnut said...

So take it off, welcome to the ugly world and 'face' your fears and challenges. Don't hide behind a mask, for faking anything is the worst crime ever

worst mask is the inside of the mask as it masks the beautiful(imo) world and life from oneself.
faking any thing to oneself is the only crime in my book. :-)

Jim said...

My friend wore a pretty mask months before he committed suicide. He was happy as anything and we didn't see any hint of suicidal thoughts


Not true
a guy who is going to take the plunge
shows very visible signs


but we fail to see the cries for help

we are soo cot up in our world we fail to se the other

Jim said...

That's a tragic situation and I forgive him anyways.
WAT THE FUCK ru saying??

forgive ???

Jim said...

in the middle ages
it was belived dat a suicider was in hell
for violating the commandment

THOU SHALL NOT KILL

Jim said...

your real self... ??


we dont have a real self
dat is constant wid time


we change all the time
its called growing

and when there is no growth
ur half dead already

we gotta change baby
recently, i met a friend from college days

he was a complete stranger to me
and vice versa

Jim said...

and 'face' your fears and challenges. Don't hide behind a mask, for faking anything is the worst crime ever.



in the macho world of men
u dont show tears

u gotta fake happiness
i subscribe do dat

happiness is contagious
so is sadness

i hate guys like Ashes and De Vile
these guys are not really sad

but sadness makes good poetry

Blabber-blogger said...

You have a lovely blog :) Adorn with thoughts that have been beautifully enunciated.

Enjoyed reading them !!

Will be back for more treats :)

Jim said...

even in riting about your sad tots
do it wid a touch of humor
as Woody Allen does

Woody Allen has been blessed (?) wid a short staure in a world where guys are 6 foot plus

and blonde and wid looks dat kill
God didnt do justice to Woody Allen


He cries

Jim said...

Arm Pitt said...
well written. so did you figure, whos wearing your mask and fooling around?

6:30 AM


HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA ....

Jim said...

DATS THE PERILS U FACE
when revealing all




.

Jim said...

only an absolute nut can be the same in all situations and all places


i put in my application for NUTTSINCAPS

Jim said...

Jeusus was such a guy
born of a virgin mother (bastard?)

born a Jew who did not conform

of course He was circumscised as per the Law (of Moses)

but wat he preached was anaethema to the Jews

Jewism was one of the most organized religion of His times

He preached anti-religion

Keshi said...

Sophia WC and thanks!



Pele..
yep I dun like ppl who act and ppl who are expression-dead...2 boring extremes.



Mich huggggz!
Me too...I hardly show it when Im sad...not worth the hassle. So I sometimes just break down and cry in my car or locked up in my room.



v000nie
omgg yess face-off! I rem that movie...was freaky nah :(



Amu huggggiezzz!
Who d u mean dahlin? :)



Kroopz really? what a coincidence!!



Sittingnut :)
**faking any thing to oneself is the only crime in my book

Thats so true...faking to one's self is a pretty ugly crime.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Cheeeeeeeesy HUGGGGGGGZ!

Ok tell me what's wrong...if u cant tell me here why dun u email me...plz dun deprive me this chance too...u know wut I mean nah sweety...when my friend killed himself few yrs ago, he rang me a couple of times...I didnt have time to return his calls besides he lived far away...I thought I could always call him when Im free...so I forgot abt it and the next thing I heard was that he's no more...

I dun mean that ur suicidal :) but I do feel u have something that bothers u and that u r indeed wearing a smiley mask when inside u r sad...pardon me if Im wrong babez...I await ur email..TC!

**You wouldnt know when am gone baby, you wouldnt know when am gone

huh?? what d u mean darlzz?

Keshi is worried now...

Keshi said...

Justin hello :)

**but because we delude ourselves into believing the mask is who we are

true...thats very very dangerous cos when u lose that mask u have no place to hide...u will be lost in ur own nightmare that u created to escape the reality...




Autumn heyyy!
**in the outside world I'm tough as nails, nothing gets me down, no problem is too big and there is nothing I cannot do - which is how I live...

I guess many of us r like that...I think Im the same...I look so tough - maybe I really am..see I dun even know! This proves what Justin said...we have become to believe that we r the mask...in denial of what we really r...


**and then I just vent, worry and moan in the privacy of blogland

Spot on! I do that too cos I cant talk to ppl I know...not becos they dun want to know any of this, only cos I want them to be happy...not worry abt me...see me as a tough person...

Not only u Autumn, we r all guilty of some masks but as long as those masks dun hurt anyone else, that's all that matters...:)

Keshi.

Unknown said...

check it out...check it check it check it check it out..

do u wana do u wana get funky do u wana get funky wimme??

do u wana do u wana get funky do u wana get funky wimme??

goooooood morningggg k000kie monsta :)

Keshi said...

Ahoyyy Puneeet!

**I would love to keep a back up of all ur post…

the backup is already there...ur memory...thats the only one that wouldnt crash (fingers crossed) :)

Ofocurse at work we r different and at home we r really ourselves...but I dun think we can call Ethical and professional conduct as Masking...thats a must in a job isnt it :)


**whereas masking means hiding ur belief… hiding ur own self…

yes and that happens often even we dun wanna accept it...dun u think? As long as it doesnt hurt someone else thats fine...but when it makes others fools, it's not right..


**If someone doesn’t accept me the way I’m… I don’t need that person… coz I can never be happy with him/her…

thats the way to go! Im the same...take me as I am..if not just leave :)



**It’s not just about hiding… it’s also about checking the other person…

well nah not really...to check out someone u dun have to put on a mask...that will be testing the person. but I think wut u mean is not being too friendly at first - that's not masking - that's keeping ur distance...not revealing too much at the start. Masking is pretending what ur not...and Im sure u dun do that :)
But I'm usually very straightforward from the beginning. I think u r the same...cos I rem how we met..rem how we hit it on straight away?


**they found me one of the sweetest person… and this what I’ve heard from a lot of my friends…

well u r :) awwww huggggz!


**What will happen if u’ll keep sweets in open… flies would attack first… u need to protect them from flies…

hey Puneet that was a BRILLIANT example - i was simply STOKED! what a comparison...where did u get it from?


**I adore ur writing… n the way u think…It’s just awesome

thanks :)


**Again my 1st comment got ignored... Hope ur not masking that u like me... else i'll commit a e-sucide

lol awww sorry - I did see it but since u said u will be back I thought I'd comment when u comment later on...:) HUGGGGGZ no e-suicides plz....how abt an e-grin? :)

Thanks Puneet u always pour ur heart out on the subjects I post, and I really value ur comments...they always make me think in a new angle...which opens my eyes...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

awwwwwwww NV mah e-son goooooooooooooood morning!

LOL wuzz with the check it out...I thought u had a new post and I went to check it out...lollz there wasnt anything new :(

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Pari huggggggz!

aww I do that too...hide my sad feelings and wear a happy clown mask :) And yes this clown cries alone too...when the mask is off. But I want everyone ard me to be happy cos the cant worry abt me nah...so let me shed my tears by myself...


**senti senti stuff while in real they just making fun of their feelings

yes I agree...I hate two-faced ppl...they say one thing to u and then laugh behind ur bak...I have come across many like that in mah life...to be honest I feel sorry for such ppl...cos in the end they r the ones who will lose...not me.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Hi Nikita!

**In everyday life,we mask ourselves to be better understood, better treated and easier to deal with.

yes true...we want others to u'stand us but we dun realise that by wearing a mask to do that, we r losing our real selves..I want to be honest and let them u'stand me that way...if they dun like me, then can go fly a kite :)


**We try to hide our flaws with plaster and duct tape in hopes that we will not be seen as "our" real self.

yes! nicely put Nitika. But i dun usually hide my flaws...Im as imperfect as everyone else is...and that's my perfection :) It's ok to hide ur sad and dark demons cos others dun have to put up with that, but to hide the flaws and pretend one's perfect is wrong...


**We perpetually reinvent ourselves so that social interaction can become easier.

yes true...this is ok though as long as we dun fool ppl..


**I would find it a breath of fresh air to know that some people in the world are brave enough to dive into the deep end and be themselves. Wotsayyou?

Im always diving into the deep end and thats why not many ppl like me...but I like myself for who I am, I dun want the glory for a mask...I would rather be hated for who I really and than be loved for who I am not...:)


Thanks Nikita that was an insightful analysis on ur behalf...good job mate!

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

kesh yea itz annoying wen ppl pretend nothingz wrong..they just laugh it offf..sometimes itz better to just be real u noe..
but sometimes u just need to hide it..i hide my feelings sometimez...just so the atmosphere isnt all depressed..but most of the timez i cant help it..u can see it on my face how i feel..
btw how u doin? wutz upp

Keshi said...

Hey Niti hows ya?

**many time we do put mask n believe me we have to as we r social living being... family n society means a lot to us so mask of kind,gentle over the face of anger,fury is essential

true...this is fine...we dun have to show our anger or sadness so much that it hurts the other person to see us that way...


**sometime we have to put mask on our sad emotions to peered on the happiness of our nearest ones

yes I do that half the time...



**i do hate those plp who cover their whole life with the mask n pretend to be very good with a real evil heart inside

yesss! These r the ppl Im talkin abt...they r like saints from exterior but deep down actually the most evil. I have had many experiences with ppl like that and I have told them to their face that they need to stop acting.


**"your life is yours so live life being yourself........ don't pretend to be that one which u are not

that's a very beautiful quote Niti...thanks! I always say Never pretend...always be urself...


Thanks and huggggggggz! Luv u too!
muah!
Keshi.

Keshi said...

Tanviiiiiiiiii mowahhhhh!

Im so glad to see u babez...I miss ur blog tho :(

yes we have to wear masks to make other ppl's lives better, not worse....


*btw how u doin

wait let me put mah smiley mask on...

ok :)...I'm pretty good and urself Sweety?

Hugggz!
Keshi.

Tanvi said...

lol i miss my blog too keshi..but i didnt blog newayz..so therez no point of missing something that wasnt reallie active
newayz..smiley mask? wutz wrongg?tell me the real feelingz..lol

Keshi said...

Heyya Prakash good to see ya bak!

**i was shocked to hear about the fake blogger ......

dun be shocked...there r alot of masking idiots ard :)


**As u mentioned every single human in this universe do that, it is fine as long as ur doing it for a good purpose....

spot on!


**i cant help thinking they have changed for good when they are wearing a mask of caring,....

I have been fooled beyond words...just like u...thats why I have no feelings or respect left for such dudes anymore...


**Sorry i could not pop in as i wish as i am bit busy these days...

Hey dun be sorry :) Drop in anytime u can...Im always here na :) TC!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Tanvi my real feelings r lost somewhere underneath the smiley mask...let me find em...till then Im smiling :)


Ur blog was pretty active man...wuts wrong with ya? HELLOOOO u made it inactive...duhhhh!

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

lol did u find em yet? come on tell me..wutz wrong? wut u been upto? itz been SO long since we talked lol..
lol yea i noe i made it inactive..but letz not talk bout it lol..im back to commenting arent i..so letz just focus on my commentz now:p

Keshi said...

Arm_Pitt :)

** so did you figure, whos wearing your mask and fooling around

nope...not that I care abt the true identity of such dumb ppl anyways. Cos even though he's wearing a mask his true nature is all over his indecent and stupid comments - he's a LOSER. So no need for him to remove his mask - would be good if he covered his ugly self for good :) He can wear the girly mask everywhere he goes cos he's half a man anyways...:):)




Nyneishia WC to my world and thanks for dropping by :)



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Tanvi u used 4 'lol's in that comment and here I was thinking Im the 'lol' queen...lollz! see! :):)


Nah nuttin to worry abt...I will email u soon - thanks for being such a sugary pie...luv ya! Wut would I do w.o. friends like u...

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

lol k0000kie..sorrie itz like a habbit to LOL now..1 sentence from me has atleast 2 lol's .. loll yea email me..ill email u too:p..lol i dun reallie email neone..i've emailed u for like the most timez..which is like i dunoe 5? loll..can u not come on yahoo some day? before leaving?
u would die without me i noe lol...:p

Keshi said...

Jim...

**Not true
a guy who is going to take the plunge-shows very visible signs-but we fail to see the cries for help - we are soo cot up in our world we fail to se the other

How would u know abt each and everyone of the suicidal ppl's minds? EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT! Some ppl show and some don't.

Besides I was far away from where he lived then...I had no idea he was in depression even! His family and friends said he was normal...very positive and was playing card games the night b4 he took the plunge in front of a train. NO his family wasnt inconsiderate abt his feelings neither were they too busy to care for him...it just happened...no one should be blamed Saby and NO NO ONE FAILED!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

awwwwwwwww so sweeeeeet Tanvi lol!

**u would die without me i noe lol

aww aww aww yes yes yes...I think Im halfway to Heaven/Hell(depending where God will put me lol) already cos Im gonna miss ya all so bad...:(


Keshi.

Dewdrop said...

I love the masks you pictured in this post. And oh this post also reminded me our lovely feathered masky, I havent visited in her while, let me quickly hop on her space to say hello..

Keshi said...

Jim...

**in the macho world of men
u dont show tears

I agree but thats a stupid mask too...I admire men who cry...


**i hate guys like Ashes and De Vile these guys are not really sad

How woudl u know if they r REALLY not sad? How can u judge someone from infront of a PC and from thousands of miles away? We even get fooled by our own loved-ones daily and how can u know someone so completely on the net Saby?


**but sadness makes good poetry

Is that what u think of me too? Just like u 'judgeded' Ash and Devile, what d u think fo me? C'mon be honest...take off ur mask and tell me ur honest 'judgement' abt me. Rem u misjudged Justin too.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Dewdy Hello :) Thanks! FM's blog has been hacked by some loser so she cant post there anymore...thats what she told me last...

Keshi.

Unknown said...

check it out check it check it check it check it out...

Keshi said...

Jim..


**HAHAHAHAHAHA
DATS THE PERILS U FACE
when revealing all


Perils? lol who said it's a peril..being cloned? It's not a hassle for me at all...in fact it's a boost to my ego :) Someone's so bothered by me and he cant get over me...thanks my psychotic fan out there.


btw when did I reveal too much? Nah I dun mask my inner self too much and at the same time I wouldnt call revealing too much a peril either...ppl who r afraid to reveal themselves r the ones who r wearing masks to cover their ugly faces...just like the anonymous commentors who harass bloggers.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

lol NV u ok? wuts up matey?

Keshi.

Jim said...

those who cant hold back the tears
shud do their crying in the rain




.

Tanvi said...

4uuu wut do u want me to check out? lol keshhh yea i noe therez like 2 dayz leftt..ur leavinnn:(

Keshi said...

Saby r u a wall that I keep talking to? Well if u r then dun flaunt ur stubborn and rude nature in my blog so freely and who gave u the rights anyways? Do it in ur own blog plz. Just cos alot of ppl come here to comment it doesnt mean u need to make this ur illicit paradise.

I'm sick of ur harassment! It's not funny anymore.

Thanks!
Keshi.

Jim said...

Keshi
u just said we shudnt put on a mask
dats wat i am doing

revealing my true feelings for yr friendz

Jim said...

its bcoz of guys like u
dat guys have to put on masks of friend ships

most guys who come here are aroused
believe u me

if they wanted intellectual conversation

they wud be heading for BHAALU the tinker

Jim said...

cut off the crap like soo shweet and crap like dat


GROW UP !

Jim said...

there is a 16 yo girl in yr circle of friendz who is more mature than u guys


funny ting is she never grows older
i once chatted hott wid her
to find out if her age is true
it is

Keshi said...

**revealing my true feelings for yr friendz

ok Saby they r MY friends...u have no right to reveal urself to them...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Sabt WTF is bothering u? Cant u leave me alone when I ask u to...

**GROW UP

And who r u to tell me to grow up? I dun think u have grown up at all...maybe u should grow up cos u never respect someone else's wishes...this is my blog dun shit all over it.


And how would it bother u if other came here to arouse themselves or not...is that what u do cos u seem to know alot abt it...

First of all stop addressing ppl with ur own set of names...they havent done anything wrong to u so why r u so agitated by them? They bring good conversation to my posts whereas all u do is criticise ppl who come here...thats where U HAVE TO GROW UP! Calling NV a baby etc look at urself??

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Ur a full-on stubborn immature person Saby...I was wrong abt u.

Keshi.

uttara said...

keshu .....ma sweety .. howz u doing .. mez too late to the office ...:(((

will catch u later

hugzzzzzzzzzzzzz

mermaid

Jim said...

TANKS !

i reallly appreciate dat honesty
but dis is me

love me or leave me

Jim said...

all masks are down now



.

Jim said...

dont call Rohit a baby
he is just a kid who loves u more than words



.

Keshi said...

Saby well ur reality isnt doing u any good btw...u got to change.



Uttara heyyy muahhh!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

NV isnt a kid...he's a sensitive yet matured guy...the right combination and mind u he doesnt act like a kid, like u do...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Then stay as stubborn an dimmature as u r...I dun give a damn but plz dun make my blog a play field for ur silly games.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Saby u dun want to admit u r immature...so u r accusing me of ur own misdeeds in this space...u r in denial and that means u r still wearing ur tough mask...

I rest my case.
Keshi.

Keshi said...

I will delete what u yell out with ur mask on Saby cos all that's fooling ppl and u r lost in ur own lies...

Accept ur mistakes and u shall be forgiven...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Saby u know u have become a cyber harassment?

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

saby just shut up lol..stop being a pain!

Keshi said...

Saby u have a big fat ego...u just cant accept u can be wrong too sometimes, and saying Sorry is so hard for u...ur in self-denial and looks like none of my posts have ever worked on u...just becos u r older and u have a big mouth it doesnt mean u r always right.

Thanks for all the cruel words and for the beautiful mask.

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

kesh well..lol forget him..we all noe how he is..dun spoil ur mood over it

Keshi said...

Yeah but Tanvi knowing how he is doesnt mean we have to tolerate that kind of arrogance. I dun have to put up with it do I? He comes and makes a mockery of ppl, is that fair? And he points fingers at everyone, almost everyone of my friends - he's the King of Criticism but when I try to point out something wrong abt him, he just produces a shield of I'M NEVER WRONG - how dare.

Keshi.

Tanvi said...

kesh yea..i noe itz annoyin wen he just comes n talks bout ppl randomly..but u think hez gonna stop? the more attention u give him the more hez gonna bug u...just forget therez someone called saby..lol..he juz posted somethin sick bout me on his blog..which i think is just so immature

Anonymous said...

Looks like Mrs.Bradman's heading for another double ton....lol
Good day keshi...:)

Keshi said...

Thanks Tanvi!


Gooddaiii South hows ya :)


Keshi.

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

I need a new mask now..

I can feel ma brain go numb...so please new maskk...I mean..new posty :)

Do I sound very demanding??

I need to na...else I will be in numb state by default

Hugzzzzzz
(Psssst..if not me, pls show mercy on ma "F5" key)

Anonymous said...

I m doing better, thanks...:)

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

Are you leaving for a long holiday...or some trip???

Why is n000ni's marquee saying that on top of his blog...just noticed it..

When?
Where?
for how long?

Unknown said...

LOL n000nie is the BBC of blogsville :p

Keshi said...

South thats awesome :)



z000nie HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

**Are you leaving for a long holiday..

aww u know that line just brought tears to mah eyes..I promise...I cant even talk right now...it wont be long though till Im back...I sent u an email...check...



NV..
lol ur CNN and BBC of the blogville. Im gonna miss u sooo much did u know that?


Keshi.

Anbu said...

Am fine...Howz ya??...
I have egoitic mask ppl.... They r annoying...
As for people wearing diff mask in diff situations... They have no ethics and values... should avoid such ppls
Work related masks...cant avoid keshi... You are betraying ur employer if dont wear masks to be more productive...and if u r betraying urself if u r wearing one...tricky situation...

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

Aww Keshurrr!

You're so so so sweet....am falling in love with ya....

Nah nah...am absolutely fine...but there are timez...when i just feel so low ... guess i might have been bored of ma lonliness or somethin n wrote thaa comment!

Thanx a billion for ur concern babez...u have fun....n njoy ur trip ok?

After a LONG time someone called me 'darlzz'... brought back ol' memories...hehe...loved it! Muuuaahh Keshur!


Dont be so sweet to me honeypie...i'll miss ya even more otherwise!


Love Ya!!


Loved it @ Saby ---
those who cant hold back the tears
shud do their crying in the rain

Keshi said...

Cheesy u take good care thats all I want u to do...byeeee! muahhhzz!

btw who called u darrlz b4?

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Spot on Anbu thanks! U tc ok :)

Keshi.

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

ma bf used to....

Jim said...

Dont look at me like dat, Kesh!

wasnt me
i will always be true to u






now lemme see
how fast she deletes dis

Drywall Mom said...

This is the first time to visit your blog. I like the subject you brought up. I wore a mask to my family until just recently about my personality and religion. The religion that I grew up with was something that I tried to believe in but in the end, could not beleive it and since I didin't want to disapoint my family, I had a different personality around them so that I could talk to them b/c before I tried to show who I really was and they didn't approve of it at all. It's not like I'm an evil person, I just thought different and they didn't understand it. I finally told them a few months ago that I don't beleive in their religion. It has gotten easier in some ways but I still don't say things around them that would upset them and it will take some time to fully get to that point since they don't approve. But I do feel like alot has been lifted off of my chest and I feel more like myself now that it's out in the open and I don't have to be as fake around them. I still have masks, but just not as many anymore.

Keshi said...

I'm really happy for u Drywall_mom...it happens to everyone...we all wear masks to please our family and friends...but deep down we r crying...wanting to throw away the mask and be ourselves...

I'm so glad u did that...u should never go with someone else's beliefs for the sake of it...u should always ask urself if u agree to it and if ur really being urself...it doesnt matter if ppl laugh at u or scorn u...what matters is YOU :) Good on ya!

Keshi.

Drywall Mom said...

Keshi - I am glad too. Since then, it has been alot easier to be myself. Eventhough I don't know what I beleive yet. But I am still happier then when I was trying to be something I wasn't.

Keshi said...

Cool Drywall I'm happy for ya...doesnt matter that u dont know what u believe in as yet...as long as u don't pretened to believe in something that you don't...

Hugggz!
Keshi.

Keshi said...

**pretend