In the depth of this pain, there's a glimmer of hope..
At the top of this joy, there's a tinge of betrayal
In the stillness of the night, there's a life beginning..
In the empty of this life, there's a fill of breaths
At the bottom of this darkness, there's a birth of light..
In the core of this laughter, there's a mile of tears
At the height of rejection, there's a span of acceptance..
In the beauty of this smile, there's a crooked deception...
I'm not sure why I wrote what I wrote above. Something deep within me wanted me to express it somehow. Those thoughts just popped up in my mind and I inked them. Maybe there's something in my subconscious mind that needs to be taken care of. I don't know. Maybe how some people have been behaving has made me stop in my tracks and ponder upon it. Maybe I'm not sure where I'm heading with all of this...I feel lost. Maybe I'm feeling a sense of detachment...maybe I'm tired of people's lies. What happens after all the pretty words are being said? Where do friends go after that? It seems people have left and I'm still here, living in their afterglow...reliving the times in their shadows. I'm caught in your shadow and all I have is hollow. Was it real? Was it a joke? Was it just me?
Can you relate to it/understand it/make sense out of it? Spill em. I'd like to know. Thanks in advance.
Current Music: Afterglow by INXS
At the top of this joy, there's a tinge of betrayal
In the stillness of the night, there's a life beginning..
In the empty of this life, there's a fill of breaths
At the bottom of this darkness, there's a birth of light..
In the core of this laughter, there's a mile of tears
At the height of rejection, there's a span of acceptance..
In the beauty of this smile, there's a crooked deception...
I'm not sure why I wrote what I wrote above. Something deep within me wanted me to express it somehow. Those thoughts just popped up in my mind and I inked them. Maybe there's something in my subconscious mind that needs to be taken care of. I don't know. Maybe how some people have been behaving has made me stop in my tracks and ponder upon it. Maybe I'm not sure where I'm heading with all of this...I feel lost. Maybe I'm feeling a sense of detachment...maybe I'm tired of people's lies. What happens after all the pretty words are being said? Where do friends go after that? It seems people have left and I'm still here, living in their afterglow...reliving the times in their shadows. I'm caught in your shadow and all I have is hollow. Was it real? Was it a joke? Was it just me?
Can you relate to it/understand it/make sense out of it? Spill em. I'd like to know. Thanks in advance.
Current Music: Afterglow by INXS
I think its just the Automanic you, Keshi :)
ReplyDeleteLast night I wrote so much...and put them to fire!
My idea is don't work on useless/worthless thoughts...it happens to everyone...
all the world is a stage Keshi....laugh and the world laughs with you...cry and you do it alone...
some write poetry out of it, and sometimes it becomes a matter of joke for the common man!
I love poetry though...i must say the refined, distilled ones :)
wishes,
devika
It certainly made a good read! Besides, if you felt writing it.....then it was good that you wrote it....isn't it?
ReplyDeletewe all have two parts of our subconscious self. one part which says, everything is fine and people around us love you and care about you. This part takes care when you are in the most pleasant self, cheering you up and providing gleefulness.
ReplyDeleteWe also have a part of subconsciousness which is constantly insecure about everything about and around us. It keeps cropping newer doubts and cynicism about everything, relationships, friendships etc. And when this part takes over , we are left with gloom and poignant.
I guess we all go through blues, and when we are passing through such stage, everything appears sad.
The whole world is a figment of our imagination. What we perceive is what we see. We assume about people, if they hate us, or love us, but the truth is far removed. TC, :))
sorry, i didnt tell you about ur POM, its nice, simple and yet insightful.Very true
ReplyDeleteSorry, i got carried away and preached. Give me a chance and i can go-on and on preaching, for a whole day. i love preaching.
**In the depth of this pain, there's a glimmer of hope..** so true, if only if we stop and think this way and not get carried away by the Pain. TC:)
Move on...
ReplyDeleteKeshi girl,
ReplyDeleteIts all reminder of our life and path to the enlightenment. Whatever combination ( opposites) you have expressed are mutually exclusive. We can’t enjoy and experience one of them without the other. Enjoy the happiness to the core with a pinch of salt( like other things).
Detachment doesn’t give us happiness, but detached attachment.
Its the bitter reality of life!!what u see is not always what u get. Things may not be as they appear to be. Hence, i never take anyone on face value. What u hav said is only a realisation that comes across after having several such experiences. Nothing new actually.
ReplyDeleterealisation... and coming to terms with it...
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling ok now da...
the poetry was simply a pure flow of thoughts... it showed :)
more than those words... you know wat is on my mind...
pls take care...
I think all of us have two minds... one negative and the other positive... and both are at conflict with each other..
ReplyDeleteAnd somewhere even if we have everything and people who love us, we feel that somewhere we are alone and seperate from the others...
Hota hain! It happens!
ReplyDeleteI am in a partnership and sometimes I feel is his words and smiles all are genuine. Then If I harbor such negative emotions for long, it wud definitely destroy me. So I just do my work and at the end of the day come home and do what i enjoy doing most- blogging, listening music or chatting with friends....
Don't worry about intentions... Be yourself...
Its like yin and yang, good and bad, black & white, angels & demons - the optmist & the pessimist in you appears together. You talk about the dawn of a new day and then in the same breath the darkness of night brining it to an end.Sometimes, we tend to welcome the dawn of a new day while sometimes we yearn for the dark of the night and the day to end.
ReplyDeleteBut somewhere at the back of a mind we also know that the end of the night will bring a new day. one friend lost can also mean you meet a new friend.
Smiles without any intention to either flatter or deceive.
ReplyDeleteNever ever understood poetry.
:(
I am not even making an attempt to understand.
Nothing against the poetry though.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteit was awesome, it felt so simple but the thoughts aw, they are just out of this world i tell you
ReplyDeletecan relate to them, sometimes what we feel is exactly felt by the other, or for that matter most of them,
but you have written in beautifully yaar just amazing,i loved it very very much
i updated my blog hope to see ya there soon
take care and keep writing........
I wish you a bless day ♥
ReplyDeleteHey K...
ReplyDeleteCheer up it's life......believe me i'm in school and beside studying.... everyone is back-bitching, gossiping, spreading rumor and what nots......
But the fact is people who actually matter to you do not believe in those rumors.....
So it shouldn't mater you know!!
Love this song btw!!! :D
It swinging between hope and despair at the same time. Seems like you are going through a bad phase and are looking for some hope or,
ReplyDeletegoing through a really good phase and are afraid that it may not last long
The whole life is a paradox. We meet everything in phases. Plus we want it ALL, don't we? Our mind crunches all this continuously and bloody doesnt let us focus..This is Sigmund Fraud for you minus the xual overtones :)
ReplyDeleteCheer up..Jo chahiye mil jayega..
These are indeed nice thoughts. Many a pain and suffer might brings certain thoughts in seek of expressions, right and truth. Sometimes pretty words fade, if they aren’t true shade.
ReplyDeleteThe mind is not still. It is when the subconscious where thoughts dormant hitherto do rise and take over.
ReplyDeleteStop a while. Allow yourself a few breaths. You have been surrounded by so many thoughts some of which have been given vent to here on this space but some lie deep down.
A small break would you have refreshed. Though it comes at a huge price of us being left alone here. But wait we will.
Be good. Be at peace.
*smilez*
and we also have to buy ARMS from USA to safeguard our nuclear reactors
ReplyDeleteclever bastards
the US of A
Devikaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
ReplyDeletemissed u heaps
where u been?
get drunk on some champagne..if you dont like the taste of beer...and then read this post..and type whatever comes to your mind...
ReplyDeletep.s.
i never got drunk in my life...:P
somehow alcohol takes a loooong tym to get it's effects on me...
lemme decode it...
ReplyDeleteIts mixed emotions Keshi.
u talk of hope bt also of betrayal.
u mention tears bt also life!
sumthing is bothering u deep down as if u have 2 make a decision or choice!
hey sweetheart...
ReplyDeletehow r u ...
am here after a while, just wasnt getting the time to catch up on blogville.....
anwyays i guess u just blurt out yur inner most feelings......dont ya worry cos a lotta times it does happen that we land up expressing ourselves n then think if it was really us .....
i guess it yur inner voice talking to u :)
btw a big warm hug for ya :)
Everyone has their cloudy days and their share of bright sunny days... so I am sure everyone understand what you have written...
ReplyDeleteJust jump out of the blue fast :)
Yes, I can relate very much to what you wrote!
ReplyDeleteYou know that, right?
And, I'm always here for you!
BBL...ok!
Take care, hun!
Margie:)
Very deep! Not sure what is in your subconscious mind....but it's good you wrote it, blogged it, and let it out.
ReplyDeleteBe happy again :)
I have read your posts last few days, but in a hurry or with interruptions so have not commented on all of them. Work is busier than usual so I get tired once I get home.
You are on a blogging spree - enjoy it :)
This feeling wud get away soon re..dun worry..Its that we just can't expect certain things at certain times..I'd say u keep behaving as u were and just dun bother how the world behaves to u..
ReplyDeleteAt least u'd be happier inside :)
tc
I am longing to see the day
ReplyDeletewhen the blog goddess will be a blushing bride
I bet she wont wear white
ReplyDeletewhere have all the good times gone?
ReplyDeletethe loves
ROHIT 4u2nav
looney
NEHA
the japonese girl
Kerry
Caraf
Karen the star bender
sheesemeister
and countless others
the fights
the police guy from Jammu
the Red Indian with a hammock on a tree
these are partying in the clouds
Janice
Pithaly
one day we will all meet again
up there
no more fights
jealousy
envy
just pure unadulterated love
I guess we might never know. The human brain is already complex, and sometimes people just want to make it even more complex, for whatever reason....
ReplyDeleteAs Shakespeare said, "All the world's a stage, and man, mere players".
We just have to pay our dues in this life and hopefully, the dues don't get too long to pay off, and we can have some fun and good company along the way.
:D
The way some people behave is just a reflection on how they really are.
ReplyDeletePretty words spoken by those that pretend to care but then the truth comes out & we know the real person.
Sincere people don't tell lies!
Nothing I hate more than lies & fake people!
God, Please deliver me from fake people!
Don't u feel that way too, Keshi?
I had my fill of a very fake person when I was at my dauhgter's wedding & when I came home I stewed for days over her but then I just said to myself, "Why shud I even give her a 2nd thought."
Just not worth waisting my precious time & I just let it go.
It was freedom to me!
TC my dear friend!
Going to soak now.
Just wanted to share that little bit with you before going!
Margie
Good Read to cheer up a boring day.
ReplyDeletei think it was real, and it was you being you.
ReplyDeleteits so normal, i mean the poem isnt something about some treasure hidden at some place people havent visited and you could find the place and the treasure :P that would have been something you could worry about!
this is something everyone feels and goes through.. just that happiness and sadness are so mixed together that one cant exist without the other. sometimes one is more visible and we overlook the other, sometimes we see both...
and youre a person who see both the happiness and sadness together so you wrote this poem..
right?
very layered, not an outright one. i like all the deceptive contradiction in the lines. Beautiful poem, however, i am not still able to guess ur mood(or mood swing in a single poem.)
ReplyDeleteIn the beauty of this smile, there's a crooked deception...
ReplyDeleteThat is a very beautiful finish. I love how you've expressed opposing emotions in every line.
It reflects the paradox of feelings constantly at loggerheads in each one of us. They are always there, we just tend to lean towards one side or the other. The Zen concept of balance may be applied here to derive many different meanings.
Keep posting. Your writings are a pleasure to read. :)
Nicely written..Keshi,what I read from these lines is- however optimistic one is, a bit of pessimism always creeps in, and vice versa...and,with good reason.It's not us, but, the external factors around us that cause this!And, need I add-it's one's own self that can make one happy or unhappy over any such events. As 'The Secret' says' Thoughts become things'!:)Have a lovely day!
ReplyDeletehey nice one..This feelings happen with everyone...
ReplyDeleteBy the ways whats ur answer of the fill in the blanks...every man has a-- and every woman has a.....
we readers answered now its ur turn...
well....it seems to me love and hatred are entwined in the words...just as hope and pain are....
ReplyDeleteyou seem to be in doubt.....
the most difficult thing in the world is not when others dont understand you..but when u dont understand yourself!!...
now i read that somewhere...and it is very true!!!!
Keshi,
ReplyDeleteThe lines you penned show that each coin has two sides. Now why are you feeling so hallow? Focus on your family, work, relatives and social circle in the same order. Lay down your priorities and try to follow them. But this does not mean that you forgo your funloving side. Be yourself with confidence and follow your conscience.
Take care
Nage aaye
ReplyDeletenanga jayenge guys
u gotta accept it
u were born alone (unless it was a twin birth)
and u will go alone
better to begin to love aloneness
aloneness dont mean lonely
says OSHO
you know, kesh... no matter how genuine the intentions of friends. no matter how well they wish for you, end of the day, it's each of us to our own.
ReplyDeletebe it friends, partners, parents... i don't think anybody can be there for us the way we can be there for ourselves.
Make it a happy day ~
ReplyDeleteKeep any sprinkle of sadness away ~
ok!
*HUGS*
Margie
ty Devika!
ReplyDelete**My idea is don't work on useless/worthless thoughts...it happens to everyone
no thought is worthless/useless Devika. :) If u feel em, then they must hv some value/truth associated with it.
Keshi.
hey ty Rakesh!
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
ty Zillion!
ReplyDeleteyes we all hv 2 sides to us...positive and negative.
**We assume about people, if they hate us, or love us, but the truth is far removed
Isnt truth what one FEELS?
Keshi.
And ty for the kind words abt my poem! @Zillion
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
hey Hobo!
ReplyDelete**Move on
does that mean forgetting it? I cant seem to tell my memory cells to forget something :)
Keshi.
ty Maddy!
ReplyDelete** We can’t enjoy and experience one of them without the other
spot on!
**Detached attachment
how does one achieve that state?
Keshi.
ty Ria!
ReplyDelete** Hence, i never take anyone on face value
ur right...but what seems hard for me to do is to kill those erroneous first impressions.
Keshi.
ty Arv!
ReplyDeleteIm ok...it has all become a part of me. Im living with it now.
Keshi.
ty Rashmi!
ReplyDelete**And somewhere even if we have everything and people who love us, we feel that somewhere we are alone and seperate from the others...
isnt that the epitome of life. Being Together yet alone.
Keshi.
ty Suresh!
ReplyDeleteIm being myself :) if I run away from these thoughts, then Im being someone else...isnt it?
Keshi.
aww ty SMM!
ReplyDeleteThats so true...darkness and light cannot live w.o. one another.
Keshi.
Tarun it isnt Shakespeare! :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
hey Thousif ty!
ReplyDelete:)
Keshi.
Maria I wish u the same, ty n HUGZ!
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
hey ty Akshat!
ReplyDelete**Bitching
Im so over ppl bitching abt me LOL! Im immune to it all. There r BIGGER things in life to concentrate on :)
yep I love INXS.
Keshi.
ty Ani_aset!
ReplyDelete**Seems like you are going through a bad phase and are looking for some hope or,
going through a really good phase and are afraid that it may not last long
isnt that what we all go thru?
Keshi.
Magpie how true!
ReplyDeleteFreud always amused me...at Uni, I used to focus too much on Freud's dream theory and compare it to my real life experiences...and i believe he got it all pinned down!
Keshi.
ty Jeevan!
ReplyDelete** Sometimes pretty words fade, if they aren’t true shade.
u always amaze me with ur brilliant interpretations of my posts!
Keshi.
ty Soul! :)
ReplyDeleteI think ur right...most dormant thoughts/matters of the mind dun get attended to unless we give ourselves a break.
**A small break would you have refreshed. Though it comes at a huge price of us being left alone here.
ok Im off! ;-)
*catches a plane to Haiti*
Keshi.
Jimmy wut does that hv to do with this post?
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Devil I hv been drunk just once...yes I blogged abt it too lol! And trust me, it wasnt PRETTY!
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
ty Arunima!
ReplyDeleteyes perhaps I need to make a decision...but making decisions and sticking to those decisions r 2 different things :)
Keshi.
hey ty Mia!
ReplyDelete*HUGZ* I guess so :)
Keshi.
hey ty KK!
ReplyDeleteur right abt that.
Keshi.
aww ty Margie! :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
hey ty Shachi!
ReplyDeleteyes I've been on a blogging-spree lately :)...maybe cos I feel there's so much to say but so lil time.
Keshi.
yes ur right Joyce ty!
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Jimmy that will be in my next life ok :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
I'd prolly wear BLACK!
ReplyDelete@Jimmy
Keshi.
Altho I miss Caraf, Jan and Pithz.
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
ty Saffy!
ReplyDelete**We just have to pay our dues in this life and hopefully, the dues don't get too long to pay off,
I agree! Life is just a temporary phenomenon.
Keshi.
very true Margie!
ReplyDeleteFakesters r a pain in the butt lol!
**God, Please deliver me from fake people!
Spot on! I wish I'd find the strength somehow.
*HUGZ* n ty!
Keshi.
ty Irshad :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
ty Harini!
ReplyDeleteyes its very real...good/bad, sad/happy, life/death all cannot live w.o. one another.
Keshi.
Anuz ty!
ReplyDeleteno need to guess my mood :) as long as u u'stood the thoughts and enjoyed it, its all good hehe.
Keshi.
hey ty Sandy!
ReplyDelete**They are always there, we just tend to lean towards one side or the other.
well-said there! Pendulums we r :)
Keshi.
ty Amit!
ReplyDeleteyes ur right...we cannot avoid the 'other side' can we.
Keshi.
hey Aritra ty!
ReplyDeleteabt that men/women post...I wrote my own answers in the comment section of that post. Check it out :)
Keshi.
ty Sushmita!
ReplyDelete**the most difficult thing in the world is not when others dont understand you..but when u dont understand yourself
yes thats so true. And when u dunno what to do or how to do it.
Keshi.
ty Jack!
ReplyDeleteFeeling down is so human isnt it :(
ty so much for ur advice and kind words!
Keshi.
I agree Jimmy...lonely and alone r 2 different things.
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
ty Raysh!
ReplyDeletethat was very well-said.
**i don't think anybody can be there for us the way we can be there for ourselves.
spot on! I guess I was feeling that all loneliness of a sudden...
Keshi.
aww ty Margie! I will try ;-)
ReplyDeleteand tnxx alot for ur beautiful e-card too.
*HUGZ*
Keshi.
I think you have come to terms with accepting all those things :) Everytime I write a new poem , I start a new journey :)
ReplyDeletety Vish!
ReplyDelete**Everytime I write a new poem , I start a new journey :)
very well-said...I love the way u put it. u nailed it.
Keshi.
Polarity is essentially a Western construct. A lot of these things that we only seem to see on a continuum can just as easily be seen on a circle, as integral and interrelated parts of the whole, etc.. You, Keshi, seem to be in the midst of experiencing that whole.
ReplyDeleteHart I thought so too...ty so much for ur great wisdom here!
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
I can never forget u Keshi
ReplyDeleteu taught me a lott
how to blog
and today TQMC is has a great net presence
I make money with TQMC
some day I hope to visit Sydney
and kiss u
Jimmy u make money from all the 'crap' u write? lol! Who pays ya for that? Some druggy? ;-)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
btw did anyone pay u for all the abuse u write abt me ard Blogville?
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Dummy
ReplyDeletego here www.tqmc.com
I know that blog of ur's but I didnt teach ya QM did I? :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
u r sadly mistaken Keshi baby
ReplyDeleteI never hurt u
Pithaly tried to plead my case
and he is gone too with Janice
ok :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
I was one of the first guys to start business blogs
ReplyDeletethanks to u and Caraf
Caraf tot me SEO
Thats good to know Jimmy.
ReplyDeleteIm a Search Engine Optimisation specialist ;-)
Keshi.
o btw where is Caraf these days?
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Gimme more tips how to optimize TQMC site
ReplyDeletewill pay
with kisses and huggs
and more ..
kisses and huggs
dream on Jimmy! :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Caraf cud be up in the clouds too
ReplyDeletebut I hope not
she is up in the mountains some where the Himalayas
she never liked parties and partying
Caraf is brilliant
gave up her religion at age 13
I did that at age 56
there is more about Caraf
she learnt some hard truths at an early age
and matured into an adult much too soon
like Michael Jackson
she didnt enjoy childhood
I know Caraf very well..she's one of the FIRST friends I made in Blogville...and a GENUINE one too. I know she isnt loaded with bullshit like most ppl here...she's so real. I miss her.
ReplyDelete**she never liked parties and partying
nothing wrong with partying but I know what u mean...did u know I HATE parties too...I go cos I get invited to many lol! But I love weddings :)
Keshi.
btw Jimmy I might disappear just like Caraf did...wut ur gonna do then? u wont hv anyone to pick on then.
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
u know I tried making money on Google adsense
ReplyDeleteI cheated and had about 500 dollars in my account and it was growing in leaps and bounds
and the Google guys got wise
I lost my account
now I am barred for life
hihihihihi
I love funerals
ReplyDeletefunerals make me get my feet on the ground
u realize that it is a waste of life to hold grudges
envy
jealousy
ego
and ego hurt
fame and fortune too dont last
u may make the head lines in the Press for a day or two
then another guy comes along and grabs the front page
and soon u r forgotten
but u and I will never die
our blogs will live on
even after we are dead and gone
like janicemumbai.blogspot.com
the dumb girl whose only cuss word was DUMBASS
and DUMBASS again
never depend on no one for your happyness
ReplyDeletesays OSHO
u must learn to love your self
and enjoy ALONEness
I agree Jimmy.
ReplyDelete**u realize that it is a waste of life to hold grudges
envy
jealousy
ego
and ego hurt
thats very well-said! It hits u harder when u go to a funeral. I hv ppl in blogs who dun talk to me...over silly things :) I wonder how they'd feel if they were ever to visit my funeral...I hv spoken to em, but they never reply..o well. Hatred can do alot of things when ur ALIVE.
Keshi.
** u must learn to love your self
ReplyDeleteand enjoy ALONEness
thats wut I do all the time anyways. I may hv a 1000 friends here but I know at the end of the day, Im all alone..and Im ok with that :)
Keshi.
Firstly I appreciate your writing skills.Those words you have penned down are great along with being meaningful.
ReplyDeleteWhat I make of it is that...you are talking of some sight of hope no matter how dark a phase you are going through.And again , in the happiness..you see a lot of disguise.
What happened after all the pretty words are said ? That depends on how you want things to happen.
I feel immensely lonely too after all the talk with friends is done.After I've come from a party.After I've spend a good time.Suddenly there is so much loneliness that whatever I enjoyed seems like a short b'ful dream.
Its best to maximize events that make you happy.Spend more & more time doing what you loved to do.That way there sldn't be much of a lonely phase.
And mostly..an idle mind is a devil's workshop.
Engage into something or other.Keep your mind occupied.That won't make you feel 'lost'.
I'm trying to do the same :)
LIFE, Love and Death are all to be ENJOYED
ReplyDeleteDeath is a new experience, why fear DEATH
for all u know DEATH and the beyond may be more JOYful
than all u have experienced till date
DONT fear the UNKNOWN
I think I am really dying Keshi
ReplyDeleteI am loosing weight like crazy
if u wish to kiss me
do it now
before its too late
http://laludreams.blogspot.com/2009/07/old-man-saby.html
Sugar ty sweetie!
ReplyDeleteI felt really good knowing that I wasnt the only one feeling this way! ur words re-assured me.
Abt making myself happy..I dun TRY to be happy...its just not me. Im happy when Im happy..Im sad when Im sad. I cant runaway from those feelings (good/bad) or try to bury them...its just me. but tnxx alot for ur advice...ur wonderful!
Keshi.
Jimmy I dun fear Death...I actually fear humans that r alive than I fear ghosts :)
ReplyDeleteKeshi.
Jimmy/Saby etc etc how do I know if its even u?
ReplyDeleteyeah ur skinny but that doesnt mean ur dying! *rolling eyes*
Keshi.
I get it
ReplyDeletethe last time u saw me
I didnt have any clothes on
no wonder u cant recognize me
Jimmy u and ur clothes.
ReplyDeleteKeshi.