Forgetting To Remember...

Selective Amnesia

We humans are pretty pathetic at remembering what we ought to remember, but we are quite good at 'regurgitating' what we shouldn't. In other words, we forget what we must not, but we can't seem to forget what we should. What's the dealio people? Maybe our memory cells are controlling us like puppets on strings? Maybe we retain more of what we shouldn't in comparison to what we should. Think about it. We remember the hurt more than we remember kindness. We remember the evil done to us by someone more than we remember goodness. We remember the tears more than the laughs. We remember the cuts more than the caresses. We forget the good people on this Earth but we can't seem to forget the baddies.


I Remember...
Why am I saying all this? I realised that people choose to forget or choose to remember, depending on what suits them the most. Selective Amnesia it is. Here are some real-life experiences that I've come across:


*Some people want me in their lives, for certain times only and then they choose not to remember me at all...

*Some others forget all the GOOD TIMES we've had over one small dispute...all cos they choose to forget those good times in the heat of the moment and choose to stay that way...

*Some people choose to remember past conflicts even when others have moved on...

*Some others choose to forget the hurt they caused others, but choose to retain that hurt as something done upon them...


*Some people meet new people and choose to forget the old friends just cos they can...

*Some walk around as if they can't remember who they are or anyone else that has been there for them when they had no one else...

*Some people really forget their old routes pretty fast but choose to remember the new routes cos it's easier to do that than accepting their amnesia...

Forgetting To Forget...
While I wanna forget these people, my selective amnesia seem to manipulate me to remember them somehow. However, I haven't also forgotten the good either...the good times...the good people...the memories of fun, love, laughter. That's a relief. Cos not many people remember the good times. But I choose to remember them...cos I can. We must remember the good times and kind deeds...remember an old friend who was there for you, remember someone who helped you when you were in need, remember the old as well as the new...remember them and remember YOU. If we can remember the bad, we CAN choose to remember the good too.

So, what do you remember today, and in that process what have you forgotten?



Something To Remember...
btw Sawan who is new to my blog, has already awarded me with such a cool award. Thanks alot Sawan, it means alot to me! Cos you chose to remember the good in my blog :). I must say you're pretty skilled at creating unique awards. Keep up the good work and hey you made my day! Also, I know I got many awards from others here and no I haven't forgotten them :)...just that I didn't have time to put them all up in my blog cos there were so many! So I wanna take this opportunity to thank each and everyone who has given me an award before (Sourish, Mayz, Crystal, Deepti etc etc) HUGS you are not forgotten!


What I've Forgotten...
I have been tagged by a zillion people on zillion and one tags, and now I can't remember who they were and what those tags were LOL! I can remember Cess, Hemanth, Busy_Writer, Beach_Bum, Harini, Comfortably_Numb, Preeti and Mayz who tagged me recently but I can't remember the others :(. So please remind me about the tags you tagged me on long time ago that I may have forgotten. Thanks!


Now, will you remember me some day when I'm not here anymore? What will you remember about me? We can't always be together forever but we can remember each other. I know I will remember you...I know I will somehow choose to remember you. This song was recorded escpecially for me by a dear friend...he's far away now and I haven't seen him in many many years...but I still remember him. Now I dedicate this song to all of you here....

I will be walking one day
Down a street far away...
And see a face in the crowd and smile
Knowing how you made me laugh
Hearing sweet echoes of you from the past
I will remember you... ... ...



Current Music: I Will Remember You by Amy Grant

Unveiling The Veiled

Ok now that I have scared off alot of my usual readers from that last post, I'm gonna scare more people now :). What am I gonna say now...nothing new that you didn't already know. I blog-hopped today and realised that some people are so negative...so moody...so frozen...so unapproachable. They are behaving as if the whole world is on their shoulders. I'm not God so I don't understand why some people behave like that. Not that I have a perfect life either, but hey I'm smiling. I look around me, I have a friend going through a bitter divorce and is on the verge of losing everything yet facing it all bravely, I have a work-mate who's in chemo for Cancer yet smiling and doing all his work quite happily, I know of a friend who's mum died recently yet she smiles amidst her tears, and I have a lot on my plate right now that you all need not know about...cos I always feel I'm still better off than my 2 friends and my work-mate, and thousands of others out there. While you are cribbing about a past love or your dull mood for longer than you should, THINK about the many people out there who have it worse than you. C'mon it's not the end of the world is it? You can walk, talk, blog, eat, sleep and yes you CAN smile, if you choose to. You're just not making that choice. That's all. When you drag your bad mood for days and weeks and complain about things you don't have, you're losing out on life. Cos all the moments you spent crying won't come back again would they? We all miss something in our lives. When you learn to live without that something, you are living with something else...and that's called courage. There's a depth in emptyness too...and there's a height at rock-bottom too. They are hidden...if you look closely, you'll find them. Unveil the veiled and set yourselves free.

(Selena - singer of this song is no more...someone stabbed her during an argument and she was only 20+ when she died. But looks like she lived a very content life, full of joyful moments)


Current Music: I Could Fall In Love by Selena

I Q Your IQ!

Here are some FACTS about human IQ (Intelligence Quotient) that I came across.


Did you know that...

* Terrorists/Racists have low IQs *I knew it that only the intellectually challenged would choose violence*

* What you eat can increase/decrease your IQ *junk does lead to junk then?*
* You are a 'genius' compared to your granpa (only cos you are more priviliged in this era and not necessarliy cos you're smarter than him!) *so don't call your granpa a dumbo now*
* High-IQ people with Street smarts do better than the High-IQ people with Book smarts *book worms don't always mean smartarses then?*
* Looks and behavior arent directly linked to one's IQ *no wonder some smart-looking and clever-acting people are dumb in real*
* Staying in school does add to your IQ than it would if you drop out *High-school dropouts and Beauty school beginners, are ya listening?*
* Having a low IQ doesn't always mean low earnings or low popularity. ie:Britney Spears, Paris Hilton. *I guess you just have to know how to use your Dumbness to your advantage then*

* There's something called Sex IQ too, meaning your knowledge and awareness about sex/sexuality *if you think Condom is a kind of apartment then your Sex IQ would be 0 without having to ask anymore questions!*

Now that we have hit an interesting point (ie:Sex IQ), Keshi stops it right there and decides to present you with some interesting questions to test your Sex IQ right now right here! It's pretty obvious that alot of young people today are sex deprived and are starving to sex-death *there's a sex related Ethiopia too yes*. Another issue is alot of people have a very low Sex IQ...meaning, the knowledge they carry about sex is rather poor, owing to many factors such as their upbringing, exposure, religion and culture, personality and genes. So let's see how sexually intelligent *or intelligently sexual* you are people. Don't be shy, don't feel dumb *not yet* and be honest with your answers now *don't google it cos if you do, I'll tell your Sex IQ score right now...it's 0 btw*. So don't cheat yourself and there's nothing to be ashamed of or taboo here...some of us are knowledgable in this area and some others are not...and it's perfectly ok. So let's have some good fun. There are 3 choices given for each Qn one of which would be the correct answer (taken from a book), while the other 2 were made up by me. Select only 1 answer for each question and please WRITE THE ANSWER WITH THE Qn NUMBER instead of a, b or c *makes it easier for me to calculate your scores faster*. And at the end, I'll give you your Sex IQ percentile. ya feel me? So here we go:



1. Which is safe to use with a condom?
a. KY Jelly
b. Hair oil
c. Sour cream


2. Homosexual activity between consenting adults is wrong
a. True
b. False
c. I have to ask God


3. Which of these foods do scientists say will enhance the libido?
a. Anything from John Abraham's fridge
b. Oysters
c. Carrots


4. On average most people have sex:
a. Once a month
b. Less than once a week
c. Never *Nil-Sex Club member Keshi style!*


5. Which of the following will increase sexual activity?
a. Exercising regularly
b. Staring at plug points
c. Getting drunk


6. After menopause, most women's interest in sex
a. Shifts to the milkman
b. Decreases
c. Stays the same


7. Which of the following is a risk factor for Cervical Cancer?
a. Breastfeeding
b. Multiple sexual partners
c. Men-bashing


8. Autagonistophilia refers to people who get sexually aroused while
a. Driving a car
b. Being flimed
c. Blogging


9. Foreplay is
a. Playing at the front
b. Having sex with 4 people
c. An intimate process to get ready and get your partner ready for sex


10. Sexually transmitted diseases can be prevented by
a. Using a condom
b. Pulling and praying
c. Asking for a blood test before romping


11. A man can tell if a woman is faking an orgasm
a. True
b. False
c. He wouldn't know anyways cos he'd be snoring by then!


12. The Morning-after-pill is
a. Taken for Diarrhoea after a night out with your partner
b. Taken in the mornings to increase your sex drive
c. Taken to prevent an unwanted pregnancy within 36hours of having sex


13. If a girl has sex on her period is there a chance for pregnancy?
a. No, I it's good fun
b. Yes anything is possible
c. Yukk mummy OMG what is that!


14. The wildest thing you have ever done is?
a. Watch porn with my partner
b. Dream of getting married *time to redefine WILD!*
c. Bondage experiments *if you don't know what that means it's best you stop here* *just joking...please continue!*


15. Syphilis is
a. Keshi's aunt
b. A sexually trasmitted disease
c. The scientist who discovered AIDS




Ok, so all the best people and have fun! I'm your sex therapist today. *smilez*


[post title I Q YOUR IQ - I'm Querying Your IQ. If your IQ was reasonable you would have got it anyways ;-) ]


Current Music: Touch Me by Samantha Fox

Make Up Your Mind

I Changed My Mind!

So these days Im munching alot of greens and leaves like a cow, cos I've cut down on carbs. At first, it was hard. But now I'm loving the salads and fish and soups etc. And it doesn't make you feel like you're suffering from a killer overdose like it does straight after rice/pasta! But I did notice the fresh choc cream bikkies in my office today and while my hands were stretching to the jar, my mind cussed me like a biyatch :( My mind said to me 'stop it right there Keshi u choc biscuit monster...do u wanna end up looking like a big momma in the making? your ass is getting there babeh!'. I was so pissed off and told my mind this as a reply 'mind your own business Mind! I will have this one today cos I deserve it and it's not like I'm eating 10 kilos of chocolate you jealous momma..it's only 2 bikkies so get over it!'...rolled my eyes and I had them for tea ;-). That's my reward for the week for being so good and sticking to my fitness plans so far. My mind can digest it, don't worry she's doing ok!

What's On Your Mind?
Now since I have stopped talking alot too *remember my recent post on resolutions* and have started to work on my Listening skills, I noticed that at home I'm not talking at all. LOL! Yesterday my sis said something to which I should have given a kick-ass answer but cos I'm concentrating on Listening these days, I stretched it a little too far and was still listening like a blockbuster dumbass! My mind suddenly told me 'Keshi are you dead? There's a person talking to you and is awaiting an answer you dingbat!'. I suddenly woke up from my Silence trance and replied to my mind 'why do you show off so much mind? I know you're awake even when I'm sleeping or having a super blonde moment...and I know you're trying to alert me but please don't act so disgustingly smart!'...and then I replied to my sis.


It's All In The Mind!
Isn't it strange how our minds always stick with us in every moment that we go through in life, no matter how big/small it is? It's almost like we live with another person in us, who's always alerting us, driving us, telling us things, stopping us from doing certain things, instructing us how to behave, giving us signals, yelling at us, laughing at us, pushing us, laughing with us, crying with us etc etc. Who or what is this Mind? When we say My Mind just like My Mum, My Dad or My Car, does it mean each one of us have something living inside of us, guiding us in life? Conscience, Instincts, Thoughts, Opinions, Intellect, Consciousness, Reasoning, Judgements, Callings, Emotions, Connections, Plans, Dreams, Beliefs, Memories...they are all born and reside in our Mind. They may be medically proven as a set of chemical reactions in the brain but it's gotta be much more than just that. The body and all other organs can be touched and seen, but can the Mind be touched? Where is it and what makes it invisible? Can the body and mind survive in isolation? Do you have conversations with your mind like I do? Are you 2 good mates or do you fight alot? Does your mind tell you one thing but do you do a totally different thing? Is your mind happy(/unhappy) with you? Are you racing with your mind and have you won(/lost) already? Share your minds here please. :)

And guys, you are always on my mind...I love ya all HUGS! This one's for ya Ishi - one of the finest humanbeings on Earth...welcome back my dearest friend!


Current Music: Always On My Mind by Willie Nelson

A Butterfly Emerges From A Cocoon...

you made me cry with tears
with the words of cares
you made me laugh
without a faugh
you make me happy
making me forget the crappy
you showed me the way to love
now i have to find the dove
today you gave me a lot of smiles
which I am carrying for miles...

This beautiful and touching dedication to me was both written and created by my dear friend Hemanth, and was posted over at his blog a few weeks ago. To be honest, I was really moved by his words and the picture he did especially for me...cos it only goes to show how much time, patience and effort he put into this to express how he feels about our friendship here. Thanks Hemanth this means alot to me HUGS! It just shows how much you truly care. You're not just words only...you're a genuine mate. Thanks for being in my life!


The Change In Me Is Progress...
In Blogville we come across all kinds of people, some stay with us and some drop out half way...that's life. What we have today may not be what we have tomorrow. Change is inevitable and must be prepared for. Some people tell me that I have changed. But I'm still here, doing my usual thing...where are you? On the net, its so easy to disregard people and chuck them away from your life as if they don't mean anything to you. The truth is, I have been there for these very people at their very beginning...when they had no one around them. But I'm not asking for anything in return for that. All I'm saying is, that on the net, its so easy for some people to cross people off their lives like they meant nothing to them...cos it only takes a button-press (delete) to do that. But I wonder if the mind can delete people that easily. The mind is something that's not very easy to control like your blog or PC...it cannot be programmed to do certain things and never look back. The mind is a never-ending road...a picture that can never be erased. So yeah, I may have changed...progressed to a higher level to be able to control the hurt such people cause me...to be able to control my mind to the best of my abilities, so that I can live my life peacefully and get on with it without stagnating in one place.


The Only Human Institution Which Rejects Progress Is The Cemetery...
When people tell you 'you have changed!' what does it mean? I change for the better, for peace of mind, for being in control of my feelings, for the well-being of everyone and for eliminating unhealthy habits from my life. Thats the kind of CHANGE I seek all the time...healthy changes to the body and mind. To be honest I have indeed changed in the last few months. Now I'm far more careful when it comes to trusting people on the net, I don't go behind people trying to explain my feelings anymore, I have less expectations from people, I don't call someone a FRIEND that easily anymore, I'm no longer into giving any more than what people really deserve, I'm quieter and more at peace with myself and others than I was before. And yes, to you it may seem like I have changed for the worst...but for me, I have changed for the best. I have 'progressed' and have 'grown' in many many ways. You may throw stones at me and tell me that I've become someone else etc etc. Before you accuse people of treating you strange, please stop and take a good look at your own self...when someone changes for the worst, the best I could do was change for the best...for who can refuse peace of mind and progress of the soul? Not me. Change is not always forward...it can be backward too. When someone changes for the worst, another will gain from it and they will move forward. Soul progression is something I take very seriously and aim to achieve to the best of my abilities...

When you are no longer able make a person understand you or are not able to change a situation, you'll be challenged to change yourself...and you will. That's what happened to me.

Let There Be Change...

Today we may be friends, and tomorrow we may drift apart. But it's ok...cos Change is inevitable and Progress is irresistable. If someone has changed, be happy for that person...maybe he/she is content that way, so let them be. And if you feel that person is not the same anymore towards you, maybe it's time for you to grow and be content with the situation. This post's title reads A Butterfly Emerges From A Cocoon......and that happens cos of Changes too. We will be evolving, changing, learning, progressing, growing from the day we are born until we die. No one stays the same forever, if they do, then there's no life there at all. Whether you're in the middle of a fireball or on the top of a snowy mountain, it all happened cos of Changes. Now share with me your thoughts and experiences of CHANGES that took place in you(/others) for the best(/worst). Have a good week ahead!


Current Music: Don't Dream It's Over by Crowded House

Gimme One!

Ok there are 10 interesting questions below for all of you to answer according to your own values, beliefs and experiences. There are no right/wrong answers here so take a stab at them with all of your honesty more than anything else. And also join in the fun...don't say you don't wanna take part etc especially in the last question...be a sport now! Remember life is too short not to have fun :). There can only be ONE answer to each question though, and keep it crisp and clear please. Now, dive in! (my answers appear below each question)



1. What is the one Thing someone has said(/done) to you that hurt your feelings the most?

My ans: An old friend once wrote a very ugly letter to me just cos I told him to get his act together...and since that day my heart has been scarred beyond recognition cos the words were so harsh. Later on, he said Sorry and I forgave him, but those words don't seem to fade away. *now is there plastic surgery for a broken heart?*


2. What is the one Thing that most people won't guess about you?

My ans: I'm psychic and sometimes I get eerily accurate premonitons! I sometimes see and feel a 5second vision (eversince I was about 8yrs old) where I'm in a terrible car accident and dying on the spot after my car falls off a very high cliff...I don't know what that means though...does anyone know? *yes Keshi has a mysterious side too!*


3. What is the one Mistake people most often make in relationships?

My ans: Expecting the relationship to work without really making any efforts to make it work, and expecting all their problems to be solved once they have someone by their side. *get real people...you'll be in a r'ship with another human, not with Saint Theresa!* *rolling eyes*


4. What is the one Spice in your cupboard you seldom use but if you threw it away you think you may need it?

My ans: Cloves *I like the smell of it but don't like it in my food*


5. What is the one Thing you don't have that will increase your energy and reduce your stress?

My ans: The inclination to get up and take a break from the PC every 30mins or so!


6. What Is the one Reason you fail to lose(/gain) weight?

My ans: My mum's Cooking is a bigger barrier than the Great Barrier Reef when it comes to toning myself faster! She cooks so well and I wanna eat more and more, and then I get love handles! *angry bitch face*


7. What is the one Question that you should never ask a woman(/man)?

My ans (never ask a Woman): How 'old' are you, are you a 'virgin', why are you fat, no wait are you pregnant? *please have your Eulogy written and your coffin ordered before you ask these questions!*
My ans (never ask a Man): Am I your first? *but if you are his first, please kill him...no rather kill yourself!*


8. What is the one Thing (food/sweets/drinks etc) you can't say No to?

My ans: Puddings *yum I'm getting dizzy right now cos mini puddings-with-wings are flying around my head!*


9. What is the one Thing that keeps growing as you use it, when all other things keep decreasing when used?

My ans: My belly! *cries* *is there any human-belly ironing services available?*


10. What is the one Thing that you want your loved-ones to do when you die?

My ans: **too bad Keshi I have more than ONE thing to mention here!* My dear family please have a rocking funeral with GNR music on *crank up the volume for 'sweet child o' mine'*, then have an acoustic guitar session for me *the coffin can get a lil lonely & boring ya know*, dress me up in my black halterneck and blue jeans and my white-stone earrings *earrings is a must even if you choose to leave me naked ok!*, do my hair please *incase I meet a hunk in my departure lounge on the way to heaven*, later on cremate me *gently please gently!* and then throw my ashes into the blue blue ocean...and say 'Goodbye Keshi girl!'. But if you wanna make a grave for me with my ashes in it *incase you're sea sick*, you may do so people *see I give you a choice even in death!*...and since Music is my life, have the following words encrypted on an iPod shaped grave please 'she came, she saw, she died laughing'. haaaaaaha isn't life funny, part-time shit! :)


Current Music: Part-Time Lover by Stevie Wonder

Too Short To Be Small

I think, Life is too short..

**to worry
**not to make the best and the most of everything that comes your way
**to live cheap
**to put off what can be done today
**to hold grudges
**to be someone else
**not to smile

**to constantly point fingers at others

**not to be able to let go
**to long for the future while the present is getting wasted
**to whinge everyday
**not to forgive
**to diet :)
**to be mean and vengeful
**not to give
**to be unhappy when you CAN be happy
**to forget your loved-ones amidst your busy life
**to always go by rules
**to wait for things to happen
**not to count your blessings

**not to see the good in people
**to stay angry for too long

**to engage in empty speech such as defaming people and spreading rumors
**not to see the bigger picture

**not to LIVE


Im sure many of you here are well aware of all that already, and are living life to the fullest, for today and to the best of your abilities. As cliche as it may sound, life is indeed quite short...I believe in that quote. Why? Well, I didnt know one February morning I'd find my 44yr old dad not waking up at all...I didn't know my cheerful friend Dan had committed suicide at the age of 25 one Tuesday afternoon, until I received that dreadful call from another friend...I didn't know Janice my blog friend would die during childbirth and that we'd never chat again...I didn't know that I'd never see my granma again after I kissed her sweet face Goodbye in Auckland few years ago...I didn't know my 2 dear uncles in their early 40s working as Police officers in wartorn Sri Lanka, would die from LTTE landmines...I didn't know my aunt M would die of Cancer all of a sudden at the age of 45, leaving her 3 young daughters behind. Yes I didn't know...but now I do. And you know, Life is really short...too short to put off Love, when you can give, share and spread it right now. (thats me with my darling granma on my last visit to NZ before she died)


And now it's your turn to fill in the blanks. Take it from your personal experiences and observations, and share them with us. Life is too short to (/not to)....? And also, do tell me which one(s) in my above list appealed to you the most. Thanks in advance. Happy LIVING guys....yes live, don't just exist...go tell your loved-ones today that you love them and care about them...put that old grudge in the bin...stop wasting time finding faults in people...patch up...make the most of this one life that you've got...have fun...be an inspiration to others. I dedicate this post to my dearest granma...I hope you're in a happy place Ma, MWAH!


Current Music: The Reason by Hoobastank

CaliforniKESHaaaan...

So, a group of friends and I went to the Charity run/walk yesterday and had a great time by the beach! The atmosphere was so relaxed, summery, sunshiney and amazingly inspiring! There were about 3000 participants all up, and whoaaaaaaa there were some super hot bods! *I fainted on many occasions just by witnessing few well-toned hunks running past me! There were Ambulance Services at many points, but I preferred to run with these guys ;-)*. Families, couples, singles, children, oldies all joined in the fun and contributed their time, energy, money and love to the great cause of medical research. There were 3 different events...one for joggers only, another for joggers and walkers *my one*, and one last one for the kids. Some parents jogged with their children in prams and some kids jogged with the happy dragon. So cute! Food, music, fun, laughter and health...the best things in life, all in one single day!

When I was a kid I used to dream of being an actress, getting married, living for myself...now that Im an adult I dream of a better, peaceful, healthier, safe and happy world for everyone. Cos nothing else really matters. This is what the world needs badly at the moment...so simple a wish yet a hard one to come by these days.

Now here are some pics that I took, especially for you. (the first pic at the top is of the beachside track). please note: I couldn't get too many pics as I was part of it too, and I couldn't stop in my tracks all the time just to take pics...and the 10km walk/run took about 1hr and a bit to finish...yes, in the burning hot sun but by the beautiful blue ocean! I have a new tan now, I'm just tanner than before LOL! It was one great day guys and thanks all for wishing me luck in the last post...with all your blessings and all of you in my heart, I made it! :)

Beachside Party...

In Love With A Dragon....

Mates With One Mission...

Start The Day With Love...

Father & Son Dedication...

Get Set Before Going...

Is That My Lost Shoe?

Tracking My Life's Timing...

Preparing For The Journey Ahead...

Training Early In Life, For Life...
















A Passing Dragon Wave...

Walk With Me Cos I'm Still Very Young...

Running For Hope...
















The Unaffected...
















I Made It Mate!

Vege Burger Anyone?

Mixing & Relaxing...
















Another Dragon Lover!

Castle Of Love
















A Walk Back To The Car...

1727 Dreams, Tears & Breaths...

All Out Of Love...

Tanner, Scarier & Fitter...

I just wanna ask you this...what's your current wish for the world?


Current Music: Californication by Red Hot Chilli Peppers