Anyways, I hope you all had a safe and happy break. I believe good and bad things happen to us for a reason...for a good reason eventually. Something good comes out of everything that happens to us. Ok catch up with all your blogs soon! And I'll update my trip and shopping details later with pics. btw it's just awesome to be back with all of you, and you guys keep me coming back to Blogville cos it's an AMAZING place - cos of YOU! And I love this new song by Britney -it's sizzling hot (wanna pole-dance for this song some day hehehe). Now, gimme gimme more...more of YOU, like I give you my all...Thursday, January 3
Margie Magic!
Current Music: Bole Chudiyan from the Hindi movie Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham
Tuesday, January 1
2000 and 7 Memories!

A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL MY DEAREST FRIENDS HERE!
Hey guys...how's it going? I'm still on my holidays...will be back for regular blogging on the 7th of Jan. Until then, I'm sharing with you some of my Christmas pics from family dinners, lunches, Xmas lights and some cosy moments with my cousins and their kiddies. I hope you all had a great Christmas break and a wonderful New Year's eve. Thank you so very much for dropping by when I wasn't around and leaving heartfelt messages for me. MWAH I love and miss you all! Can't wait to get back to Blogville. I have also been going on little trips, some long drives and to beaches and BBQs. Some scenic pics will follow later on. For now, enjoy these Christmas pics (click on pic to read captions). Man I'm food-drunk and have put on weight! :( I intend to get back to my regular exercises and walking asap...til then I'll roam around like a wobbly lil product of rich festive food, jeez!
The song playing right now is my fav from year 2007 from a great Aussie band, and I dedicate it to the memories of year 2007. God bless you all for a wonderful, happy and safe 2008, have a blast guys and see ya soon...MISS YA MADLY!
.. .. ..
Wake me up low with a fever
Walking in a straight line
Set me on fire in the evening
Everything will be fine
Waking up strong in the morning
Walking in a straight line
Lately I’m a desperate believer
But walking in a straight line.. .. ..
Current Music: Straight Lines by Silverchair
Friday, December 21
Merri Merri Keshimaschhh!
through every gift that's given...be it for your loved-one or for a total stranger in need. Gifts arent always tangible...the greatest and the most precious gifts usually come in intangible forms. To express what those intangible gifts can be, I came up with this little recipe for a meaningful Christmas that you may like to read (trust me I'm working hard on this myself :)). This was written by me using my own experiences in life. So here it is:
recognition***. I will still be online on and off, whenever I get time, but it won't be as regular until after the holiday season. Anyways, My Christmas message to myself and all...May we never forget the less-fortunates, the war-stricken, the sick and the old, the dying, the soldiers, the babies in ICU, the hungry, the neglected, the poor, the disabled, the lonely, the depressed, the abused, the lost, the living and the dead...may we always remember.
Wednesday, December 19
It's In Your Deeds
A British schoolteacher has been arrested in Sudan accused of insulting Islam's Prophet, after she allowed her pupils to name a teddy bear 'Muhammad'... ...it is seen as an insult to Islam to attempt to make an image of the Prophet Muhammad... ...angry crowds have demanded the death penalty for a Sudanese newspaper editor over an article allegedly questioning the parentage of the Prophet Muhammad. Read here.
A 16-year-old Mississauga girl who was allegedly strangled by her father in a dispute over her refusal to wear the hijab has died... ...“She wanted to live her life the way she wanted to, not the way her parents wanted her to,”... ...She calls it a fallacy to think that wearing a piece of fabric makes a girl more spiritual, when what she does is more important than what she wears on her head. Read here.
Question: Faith or Manipulation, for where is Freedom?
A YOUNG Asian woman was murdered for bringing disgrace on her family, after they heard a love song had been dedicated to her on a radio station, cops said yesterday... ...Heshu Yones, 16, from Acton, West London, was stabbed 11 times by her dad before he slit her throat... ...her Kurdish Muslim father, jailed for life for murder in 2002, said he had to kill her because she formed a relationship with a Lebanese Christian. Read here.
LONDON - A father who ordered his daughter brutally slain for falling in love with the wrong man - a man who didn’t come from their Iraqi village, in a so-called “honor killing” was found guilty of murder... ...Banaz Mahmod, 20, was strangled with a boot lace, stuffed into a suitcase and buried in a back garden. Read here.
Is there a God who rewards you when you imprison another with your beliefs? Is there a God who sees differences between a Christian and a Muslim, or a Hindu and a Buddhist? Is there a God who tells you to kill His children just cos they want to live life the way they prefer? Is there a God who applauds you for taking away someone else's right to live? Is there a God who tells you that you are his great devotee if you hurt another? Is there a God who teaches you to dominate women and crush their freedom and dreams? Is there a God who worries about what you wear rather than what you do? Is there a God who blesses you when you strangle a child with your bare hands? Is there a God who doesn't recognise love? Is there a God who promotes hatred and violence? Is there a God who instructs you that killing is honorable? What's so moral about throttling another with your beliefs? What's so Honorable about Killing? To me it is the LOWEST act a human being could ever do to another! Tell me, is there such a God? Is this what your faith is? Does that God know about forgiveness, acceptance, love and humanity? Doesn't He sometimes cry, feel, want, need...love? What/who is your religion/faith/God? I follow the religion of 'Live and let live'. I pray, not through words but through my deeds...for the God I know manifests through my deeds.Current Music: Pray by Tina Cousins
Friday, December 14
Bloke Talk
Ok my office guys were really sweet, 10 of them (all Aussies), and just 2 chicks (myself and one other Aussie girl). The night-out was fantastic! A little bit of Vodka and great mates, made me feel relaxed and happy. And you too...for all the kind words you left for me in the last post...they REALLY helped. And Darsh thanks tons for your caring txt msgs! You have no idea how awesome I feel every morning reading all your comments here...it feels like the fairies have visited me overnight and left gold-dustish trails for me to revel in. Thank you so much for being in my life, you guys just rock!
o left our company few years ago...he came along as well and I was really thrilled to see him. Cos I really like this guy...he's so very funny, every word he speaks makes you wanna ROFL, and he's a very smart guy too. There was another ex-workmate who I used to be in love with (one-sided love alert!). He has the most amazing blue eyes I have ever seen! He came along too and I was just jaw-dropped all night long, my tongue wagging that way and drooling heavily, and then I got so annoyed with myself etc etc Keshi o behave! So we all chatted and laughed and caught up with each others' lives. The only other chick who was present was also an ex-workmate and she told us that she recently got married...in Hawaii too, now that's just WAAAWW isnt it! She then asked about my love life and I was speechless for a while and then I just laughed. Anyways guess what the first topic one smart dude started on...guess? guess? Well it was about ex-partners. I was like 'you mofo you had to bring that up' in my head. He started telling us about a recent incident where he ran into his ex and wanted to dig a hole and disappear (he must have done evil things to her oooo!). I swear I didn't mention my story to anyone and I was wondering where this topic was co
ming from hmmmm. Tys I was thinking of your comment just then...:). Anyways, I kept quiet and then the topic changed to recent Aus politics, and then to work, old bosses, Xmas, IBM, office gos etc etc. Anyways, thank God the Bon-Jovi lookalike didn't turn up cos if he did, I'd have passed out without even having to drink! btw I didn't drink past 2 glasses of Vodka..that's me. I don't like to drink alot, neither can I take in alot. Tipsy runs naturally in my blood you see (no surprises there!). All in all the night was just so refreshing, I had a very good time.
Now there is this single guy in my office (recently turned single cos he went through a divorce last year after a brief marriage), who seems to like me alot. He too came along last night. I know he's a good mate but he tends to pass hints at me...hints that suggest he likes me alot and hints that seem to indirectly ask if there's any chance of a date with him on my radar **rolling eyes**. I quite conveniently play dumb with his hints hehe, not to hurt him or not cos I don't like him, but simply cos we work together and I don't wanna date someone from work. I'm not the office-flirt kinda girl. Also, it'll mess up alot of things and worse, I don't wanna go home tell my mum I'm seeing a divorced guy...she'll faint and never really recover LOL! Don't get me wrong, my mum is a very broad-minded woman...she doesn't judge people based on failed relationships. Actually it's not even my mum, I think it's me. I think I've become a closed personality when it comes to love. And I have a subtle fear of divorced men...don't anyone have that fear initially? I mean, especially if you have never been married before, you do tend to think that someone who got a divorce would be alot harder to push yourself to start dating. Am I wrong? I don't know...there's this psychological barrier that sort of stops you from thinking about someone who's got a recent divorce, as a potential partner. It makes you wonder about all the WHYs
of the divorce and whether he's being honest with what he's saying etc. But that doesn't mean he's a bad a guy, no ways...this dude is a genius in our office, and is a very sweet and decent bloke and a wonderful friend. I used to know his ex-wife too...she used to come around for office drinks/parties. They are both very sweet people, so I don't understand why they broke up, but what he told me was that she got bored with him. Just like that? hmmm...do people get divorced just cos they get bored with each other? LOL sounds funny doesn't it? I don't judge anyone from their past relationships either, but a divorce does worry me a bit...not that I don't make mistakes myself but there's something that stops me from forgetting that he just got a divorce...WHY or WHY! It probably isn't even him. It may be cos I'm so used to being single now running around wild and cooking in my knickers...maybe I don't wanna date anyone anymore...I really don't know! So ami
dst vague romantic signalling from him, Keshi refuses to give him the green light. She's at an eternal red, cos she thinks why start something that doesn't bring out the 'right' feelings in her...atleast not yet. Am I a narrow-minded cow? Am I a selfish 'spoilt princess' of this modern era? Am I really being a wuss here? Am I a total jerkette? Am I a completely lost and confused bimbo? You tell me. Be honest ok!
ow that jebus! :) He said that just for fun, I know. But I think that was also another hint...another one of those indirect messages. Am I a cold-hearted bitch who don't give a good guy a chance? Is that why I'm eternally looking for love? Am I so used to being that single diva for so long that I ignore love-signals by my own choice? Am I looking for something that don't exist? Am I gonna end up as a wrinkly old saggy-boobed 109yr old still-single granma still trying to fit into Victoria's Secret goodies that no one wiill ever see? Or am I just desperate for some loving? You tell me.Have a good one guys!
Wednesday, December 12
A Long Distance Call
Current Music: It Must Have Been Love by Roxette
Monday, December 10
True Humanity
ll of us...he did what he was trained to do, with no complaints or fears. He was doing the right thing and he was never afraid to even die doing the best he could as service to man. Long live Cart's beautiful memory and true valor!
Carts reminded me of several German Shepherds we used to own before my dad died. Since my dad was also a Police officer, he was an avid dog-lover. The last German Shepherd we had was Ginger (this is not a pic of Ginger but he looked exactly like this and used to sleep like this too - I have pics of Ginger that I need to scan). Ginger was a big black cuddly dog who loved to run around crazily and get tired for no reason. Then he used to crawl under the bed and bark playfully. We used to take him for walks and to play with other dogs, and my dad used to put him in his car and drive around. Ginger sat quietly in the front seat and was a very obedient and well-mannered passenger. Ginger had better qualities than some humanbeings. Ginger taught me how to be patient and stay quiet when you don't get what you want...Ginger taught me how to obey....Ginger taught me how to just be happy for no reason....Ginger taught me how to show affection unconditionally...Ginger taught me what it is to greet someone everyday from the heart...Ginger taught us that it's great to be honest all the time...Ginger taught me how to appreciate...Ginger showed me how to love and LIVE every single day like it's my last. I remember Ginger oh so fondly...he was one of a kind. And I remember my sister and I cried for months when Ginger died. I remember we held a candle-lit vigil on the day he was buried. I remember Ginger, and I learnt so much from him than I ever did from some humans...Ginger was more human than some humanbeings.In a world full of terror, pain and fear, I still pray...cos even though some humans are like animals, I still believe in humanity cos of some animals like Carts and Ginger.
Current Music: I Still Pray by Kasey Chambers
Thursday, December 6
Naughty Or Nice
If you could ask for anything from Mr.Claus this year, what would it be and why?
Now put your thinking caps on and answer with nothing but honesty. Write a letter if you must, as your comment. After your comment, you'll get a reply from Santa and he'll say if you've been naughty or nice! Hey join in the fun now and see what Santa is gonna say to ya. Don't say you don't believe in Santa etc etc. ***Keshi blocks her ears and goes 'lalalalalala'***. Jeeeez don't you know how to have some fun! Now dive in sweeties and please be true to your hearts with your answers. THANKS guys!
Today's song is a dedication to myself...I need a holiday in paradise and someone to go with me. That's my genuine wish this Christmas (I'll post my entire list later on). Santa please be kind to me atleast this December! You have been a bloody rude fat beardy bastard so far! Put your beer down and read my goddamn letter this time. HO HO HO...you are!
Current Music: Two Tickets To Paradise by Eddie Money
Wednesday, December 5
Just Shoot Me!
A No-Frills Brain
**One day I was shopping in a Myer store and I suddenly meet a specimen of my immediate-wrath-about-to-ignite. He's a friend's friend and we have met before. He goes 'I think I know you...do you know me?'. ***Keshi is about to pass out due to severe trauma that was caused by that sentence***. OK I may know you but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't know me anymore even if you knew me before, cos right now it seems like you walked out of a Buy-one-get-one-free Psycho Conditions store...it's that massive mate! I didn't really say that to him but in my head I was so disturbed by that question I wanted to throw up! Do people really ask that kinda question, I think I know you...do you know me? What does he think I'm - that I just stepped out of a mental goodies warehouse like he seems to have!A Brain-In-Training **Another day I was cooking at home, and my cousin (not really dumb but can be dumb at times) walks in to the kitchen and switches off the stove. HUH? Did I even witness that? Worse, I kept on cooking! 2 seconds later, my brain told me about what he had just done. So I turn to him and ask 'Why did you switch it off when I'm still cooking?'. He goes 'Cos we are going out tonite'. Wow my dear brother, so we are going out tonight which is still some hours away, and I have to leave the chicken half-cooked on the stove-top, just like how your brain is half-functioning right now? I don't think so Timmy! Cmon add your brain into the cooking..it needs some defrosting for all I know!
Powerful Brain Repellent
**I have a friend who is an Internet user but don't know much about computers...to be precise, she doesn't know about computer Viruses etc. No probs there, cos alot of people don't know much techie stuff unless they work in the IT industry. But a terrifying discovery took place when she asked me this bizzare question one day. 'Keshi I want to protect my PC from viruses...what do I have to do...should I spray disinfectants on it?'. OK that's enough my friend...plug it off and take it back to the vendor please. That way the PC will remain sane too! Cos my brain died a violent psychotic death for a minute or 2, right after that question from her!
A Brain Ride
**One night I was just sitting on the couch sipping coffee, thinking how beautiful life is. Not for too long, cos 5mins later I got a deadly phone call that sent me on a shock spiral staircase! A friend of mine rang me to find out what the time was! WTF?? Where was she ringing from - from Mars? I mean cmon, did she have to ring me to find out the time provided she was still on this planet? Worse she was ringing from her mobile phone which probably has a clock ***rolling eyes and it wont stop***. No she wasnt trashed or on drugs, neither was she coming back to life after a deep coma or from a scene from the movie Castaway. However, I'd like to believe that she probably was in the middle of a brain transplant!
Brain Drain**My mum's bday is on the 28th of June. All her friends know it and have been wishing her every year on her bday. Let's call my mum J. One Sunday in March this year, we went out to a party and came home to find a message on the Answering machine. It was from one of her closest friends R. I put it on speaker and it went like this: 'Hey J it's R here. HAPPY BIRTHDAY sweetie!'. I felt like I was listening to that message while being electrocuted! This must be my rebirth cos I didn't know my mum's bday was in March!! Or is this our house that I'm checking messages from? I looked to see if it's the correct house...yes that's our dining table, that's my photo - yes it was our house AMEN! So it was my friend's mum who was probably going low on her brain's battery power...not me!
Brain Killers
**One day I was walking down the street and I see this young guy trying to take a new couch into his house. The couch is wider than his main door, but who asked him to take it in horizontally? I saw him standing there, staring at the door like he was wishing the door was wider awww. How about trying to take it in vertically brother? If that thought don't get developed by your grey matter, then throw a bomb and break the door so it would be wider? Even better, buy a new house with a wider door cos you'd feel smater then. And that way I don't have to die a slow and painful death watching you either!
**Have you noticed some people wearing sunnies at night/indoors? Sunnies hello! Have you noticed some people getting out of the train just when the train doors are closing? Do they have a deep sexual fantasy for getting caught between the doors and suffocating - asphyxiation anyone? Have you noticed some people walking down the street not allowing anyone else to share the road? Do they think the road is their bathroom? Have you noticed some people talk/laugh so loud in a hospital with no concern for patients? I think they are the real patients. A cranium-refill is in order. And witnessing such people has already attained me Nirvana...Loka Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu (May all the beings in all the worlds be happy), amen!Share with me some super-dumb encounters in your life.
Current Music: I Want To Break Free by Queen
Monday, December 3
The Wuthering Heights
I went to the beach and later on some of my friends went Fishing, so I joined them. Here are some pics both from the beach as well as the Fishing trip. First few pics are from the beach and the rest are from the Fishing trip. The roses are from my cousin's driveway.
Watching the waves, listening to the water, walking barefeet on warm white sand...that's all I need to escape from routine life. The fishing spot was also very beautiful....with shallow waters and fresh green shrubs. It was magically soothing to the body and mind. When I observe nature closely, I realise how very similar it is to people and the lives we live. (that inspired the captions of the slide-show pics btw). Nothing is permanent in life...just like how the fish that had it's lives changed in a second by my friends who were fishing, just like how the green shrubs were left all alone when the tide got low and the water disappeared (compare last 2 pics of the same spot, one with and the other without water), nothing is forever. Bonds, changes, separations, losses, reconciliations, storms, resurrections...they all make life what it is. And just like how nature remains content no matter what, humans also have an inherent quality of survival in them that makes them withstand the harshest conditions of life. Life must go on no matter what...cos we are part of nature...just like the trees, water, fish, stones, birds and the sands...we are nature.
We are made to flow like a river, cutting through it's rocky barriers, yearning to reach the final destination somehow...we are made to fly like a bird, soaring up in the skies and reaching the stars...we are made to swim like little fishes, taking each new day as it comes, be it the last day on Earth or not. When we steam in anger like hot water, when we calm down like snow, when we smile like the sun, when we shine like the moon and the stars, when we fall like how even some strong rocks fall, when we bloom like the flowers, when we wither in Winter, when we whistle like the breeze, when we kiss like the waves kiss the sands, when we wanna hold hands like the shrubs do with the shallow waters, it's only natural and that nature in us lives forever. And it's only native for us to endure the storms of life...and naturally, there's always sunshine after rain. So hang in there, through whatever the rough waves you may be riding right now. For the nature in you, will find you the shore somehow...I'm standing alone in this stormy weather, but I know that the nature in me will somehow hold me strong in these wuthering heights.
UPDATE: Just now, as I was about to publish this post, I got a call from my cousin D in NZ. My uncle who was going through a real hard time for the last 6yrs (the one who you all prayed for in my March post A Day Of Reckoning), finally got his miracle! This was his final hurdle. I can't believe I got the news as I was typing this very post...it's just amazing! I'm so happy guys and thanks so much for praying for him, it worked! This is just unbelievable! Nobody thought he'd come out of the hell he was in...finally he did! And I'm so glad me and my cousin D never gave up on him and did everything we could to help him til the last minute, when everyone else gave up on him...and we somehow won! That's what I'm trying to say through this post too...hang in there, don't give up, your time will come too! I'm dancing and crying now, for my uncle :*). Finally God looked his way! And that is enough for me to believe He is there. Cos even my uncle's lawyer said that this is a miracle. (this pic with him was taken when I was in Auckland last year).
This song always makes me hold on, and I'm lucky I saw REM perform this song LIVE in Sydney few years ago. Omg I still can't believe I got that call when I was about to publish this post! Hence I dedicate this post to my uncle's true courage and strength, that somehow prevailed when the whole world laughed at him...when his own brothers and sisters mocked him...when he asked for help and did not get any in return...when the very people he trusted did not believe in him. He somehow survived those wuthering heights...cos he believed in himself.
Current Music: Everybody Hurts by REM
Thursday, November 29
Dumb-Blonde Moment #341954
'Keshi can I check your hair-roots'. That's a line that one of my work-mates used to tease me with, when I said/did totally dim-witted things....and trust me, such moments are not rare in my life. Infact they are rather common ***puts on a fearless James B-l-ondish face***. This post was inspired by Cinderella's recent post. I had started writing my own post on this topic ages ago, but something didn't allow me to finish the post. It seeme to go on and on. Why was that? I realised I had started writing the post 'Keshi's Dumb-Blonde Moments', and since such moments were countless in my life, the post was endless too LOL! So when I saw Cinderella's post that listed only 2 of her DB moments, I decided to limit my post to 1 such DB moment from my rather fashionably blonde life so far. Hence this post and that title. Now you know I hold a grand status in society from that very DB factor in my blood. Atleast I do it with style ok! So here's my DB Moment #341954 and this is the latest incident in my life. Read it at your own peril!An Eternal Bond With 'Blonde'
Last Wednesday I bought a Thai Chicken Salad for lunch. They put the salad in a plastic container and poured alot of spicy Thai dressing on top it was almost like a soup. Then they closed it with the lid, put it in a paper bag and gave it to me. I carried it to my office building, then in the lifts and got off at my floor. Just then I met my boss who was waiting to catch a lift to go down. I said Hi to him and he said Hi too. And as I opened the floor-door, I forgot about the liquid in my lunch box and held the box upside down ***CODE RED: Dumb-Blonde Moment alert!***, smiling so beautifully at my boss and yakking as usual, expecting everything to look so heroic - you know, lunch box in one hand, opening the door from the other while talking too - it made me feel like Bionic Woman! Tragically for me, the hot and spicy dressing had escaped through the sides of the lid and have now started doing a Thai dance on my black skirt. And guess what? I was not even aware of it yet. Surprised? Don't be. Cos there's more to this Thai dressing catastrophe owing to my lovely DB genes. My boss probably would have seen the liquid all over me (I'm embarassed to the core!) but he got into a lift and disappeared (probably the wisest thing he did at that moment or else I'd have poured it all over him too). I walked in through the door (still not realising the very smart DB act I have just committed) , walked to my cubicle and hey presto I managed to feed some Thai dressing to my desk too woohoo! Cos as I placed the box on the desk, it was upside down anyways. That's when I finally (om shanti shanti shanti!) realised what I had done - HALLELUJAH glory be! The whole scene probably took about 10secs to unfold, but so much has happened in that small time frame and it proved that the DB factor in me is quite unbeatable - going very strong! Now my desk looked like a Thai river and my skirt looked like a Thai kitchen. I smelt as if my new shampoo was made of a Vinegar variety, and my whole desk-area smelt like a Tom Yum Soup company. Not to forget, I managed to spill some on the very clean office carpet as well. Panic struck! The legendary DB quickly ran into the office kitchen, got some cleaning agents and paper, ran back to her desk and started cleaning like a maniac. Then one of my work-mates (dammmmit and
it had to be the Bon-Jovi lookalike!) came over to ask me something just when I looked like I was in the middle of a Tsunami, trying to rescue my desk area and myself. He took one look at me and left without asking anything (no surprises there). There was no way I could have washed my skirt (cos I didn't have change) so I continued working for the rest of the day smelling and feeling like a Dumb Blonde made in Thailand!Your's Fashionably,
Current Music: Atomic by Blondie
Wednesday, November 28
Life After Love
I wanna convey my deepest thoughts to one of my blogger friends here. Recently it seems that she is 'dwelling' on her breakup with her ex-BF in a real unhealthy manner, and it really made me wanna shake her to reality. All her recent posts disturbed me to the core. I know that it's her blog and she can write whatever she chooses to write, but as a friend, I couldn't just sit and watch her deteriorating that way. You may think I'm being heartless, but sometimes I come out as a mean witch when I tell my friends what they don't wanna hear...sometimes you've just got to be honest to bring your friends to their senses. And that's what I did with this friend over the past few months...but sadly it seems that my advice has being taken very wrongly...i.o.w. I've been misunderstood not only by her but also by few regular visitors in her blog, calling me names, that I don't KNOW her at all, that I'm being mean to her etc etc. And why? Only cos I suggested that she needs counseling! And that final suggestion came after alot of sympathising at the beginning, thinking that she'd change. In my opinion anyone who don't think their life is precious just cos of a BF who doesnt even care abour her, NEEDS COUNSELING. And by that I don't mean they are going mental. I'm shocked at how some people look at Counseling as if it's a shameful thing. Anyway that may b
e because they don't know the correct meaning of Counseling. Now you all know that even I can brood over something quite royally...but then again, you also know that I get over anything real quickly, right? That's one of my strengths and I'm thankful for that trait in me. One thing I can't stand is brooding over a long period over something that's not worth your time and energy. Also, while none of you have met me in real, I believe you all KNOW me well enough to give me advise on almost anything that I'd want you to help me with. Why do I say that you all know me well? Cos my blog is where my heart speaks...every little detail that my heart conveys is writ
ten over here. So who else would know me better than you guys? I don't think even my non-blogger friends know my emotions this well! Therefore I feel quite shocked at being told I don't KNOW her well enough to advise her etc etc. Well in my opinion, through a blog one can read another's deepest emotions quite well and that's enough to KNOW them, unless ofcourse it's lies that they are saying. Anyways this post is for anyone who's going through a painful breakup. Please understand that this post is not to belittle anyone's feelings. It's for everyone to realise that you CAN survive a painful breakup without killing your sense of self-worth. So here it goes, take it as you like it, and I'd like to emphasise that if you feel bad by reading this post then it maybe cos truth always hurts.
What a girl goes through when she breaks up with her boyfriend is not a new thing to me. I have been there, faced it, cried rivers, felt like I couldn't go on etc etc. I too wallowed in sorrow and self-pity for a while. I just had to do that cos it's natural to any humanbeing post-breakup. My relationship with him was for few good years. But it didn't take me a century to get over it, neither did it make me lose my sense of self-worth. Cos fortunately I realised what's gone is gone. And that love cannot be forced or begged for. If you love something, set it free...i
f it comes back to you, it was meant to be...if it doesn't come back, it never was your's. I believe in that quote very strongly cos it applies to any relationship. But I agree, it is very hard to concentrate on anything immediately after a breakup...the whole world don't make sense then. It feels like you can't go on and that you've fallen into a bottomless pit. Hang on, stop right there! Who's making you feel this way Keshi? It's YOU. My boyfriend has moved on so what was I still feeling sad about? Why do I have to cry for someone who's not worth my tears? I say it's cos I lost my LOVE? Ok so what is my LOVE? If he isn't in the picture anymore, if he decided to end it, is there any LOVE? I guess not! I may still love him but he doesn't love me enough to stay with me right? So to hell with it, I PREFER TO MOVE ON! And that's exactly what I did. Back then I didn't even have a blog or so many friends to talk about it..I didn't have the means to write a single post/poem to vent out my feelings...nobody was around to lift me up or give me a hug. But 'I' was there to lift myself up - I had to do it, cos it was I who put myself there in the first place right? The road ahead me s
eemed very long and it didn't look all that exciting to hitch-hike again on, but I wouldn't know how exciting it would be if I didn't try walking again right? So after few months of feeling like I was crawling on the floor and bleeding to death, one fine day I just got up, wiped my tears, started taking care of my open wounds, and continued to walk again. That's when my Love for him ended for good. And it was a clean end...cos I didn't look back with self-pity or tears. And yes, the road ahead was much more exciting than I thought it would be! The new journey found me a new and stronger ME who started loving and respecting herself first. My broken heart was back in full form.Now to the most important part of this post. Think about this...what if I had I not moved on? Had I continued to cry
over him for longer than that, had I kept on feeling sorry for myself, had I kept on bringing back the cosy memories from the past, had I kept on dwelling on a relationship that was no more, had I not gotten up and taken one step down that new road, what would have happened to me? I would have ended up being obsessed. And in that process, I'd have started imagining that this is indeed my LOVE for him still going on. Well guess what, it'd not have been Love anymore...it'd have been just Obsession in disguise. That very love is no more but you have a new addiction - and that is that love and the breakup itself. Alot of us fail to see that. I'm not a psychiatrist but I can easily tell the difference. How? Cos Love doesn't beg, love doesn't make you weak, love doesn't make you lose your self-respect so much that you think you can't live without that person, love doesn't swallow your self-confidence and self-esteem so much that you get depressed to the
core, love doesn't make you want something so badly that you forget your sense of self-worth...but Obsession can do all that to you! Love teaches you to have patience, to respect yourself, to let go and live...but Obsession makes you paranoid about living without someone, it makes you fully dependant on someone and it makes you miserable longing for someone who don't even care about you! And that's the difference between Love and Obsession. And trust me obsession can lead to serious consequences. It may start
off as a little bit of craving but too much of it over a long period of time can be self-destructive. It's the same as love of eating ice-cream...but what happens when we over-indulge in that love? It becomes obsession. We may not realise it before it's too late and that can be devastating. I believe that at the end of Love, Obsession waits for you, longing to begin. Always beware of that and never give Obsession a chance cos it can swallow you up and make you forget yourself. Also know that love happens and it can end too...learn to let go for we can't force our love on someone can we? So when love ends, cry a little bit, then say goodbye to it, pick yourself up, keep your head straight and remember not to welcome Obsession who's waiting around the corner for you to say Hi!
Yes we all fall in love, those Loves sometimes end and we all hurt, people find new paths etc etc but guess what...love can happen again too! Love is so broad-minded that it gives you 2nd chances in life. I'm not saying a brandnew person will soon replace what was in the past in your life (I myself hate it when someone says that to me), but my point is, don't get so hooked on one person...a person that doesn't even care about your feelings. You are smart, beautiful and loving...know your self-worth, regain your self-esteem, realise new things about you, learn to respect and love yourself before loving someone else. Life has so much to offer and your happiness don't depend on anything external...it has to come from within you. And if you have so much love in you, channel it to someone/something else that may appreciate it better. Discover the many possibilties of self and life.
This song is for those who ache in silence. Know that there is life after love, and that you will survive. Cos I did, and this song helped me alot to gain that strength. Enjoy and take care of yourselves first cos YOU deserve your love! Learn to let go of what's holding you back and set yourselves free. And please share with me your breakup-survival stories...would love to learn from you too!Current Music: I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor
Monday, November 26
A Little Mermaid's Tale...
This song is for Loshi sweetiepie. She loves this song and wiggles her little body to the rhythm of it...and I like this song too LOL!
Update: Updated the song to another dance fav of Loshi and the team, and this is one of my dance favs too. I do these dance moves with the kids hahaha!
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