Reminds Me Of You

Guys I'm going away for a coupla days from Friday. It's the Labor Day long weekend in New South Wales, so we family and friends planned a mini escapade in the far NSW (10 of us). I need it badly and I want to soak up some sun in the daytime and star-gaze at night. It's gonna be fantastic cos we have booked in a country hotel (I hope there are no ghosts there) and we'll be going to few Spring festivals too (can you remember my last year's Tulip festival post 'Fields Of Heaven'?). Well it's that time of the year again and Spring is making me fall in love again and again (I'm a puke-sappy romantic, guys you have no idea!) and I'm dying to shed all my Winter clothes - eeeeeeeeeks I loathe heavy jumpers, beanies and sloppy joes. Time to get my board-shorts out and hit the waves. I love the ocean, pools, lakes and I just love sitting in the Spa (as long as there are no bulky men in it) and day-dreaming till I have nothing left to dream about - no I'm never short of dreams. So yeah, I'll be away for few days..I'll be back next Wednesday perhaps. I hope that you'd be able to take a break from my whiney posts too :), so relish my absence guys!

I'm gonna miss all of you though...but guess what...when I'm over there in the outback, I'd observe so many things and I'm sure I'd have a milllion new things to blog about LOL! My mind meter don't stop ticking or slow down you know. And I'd see/hear/taste/smell/feel so many things and they'd definitely remind me of each one of you. These days it happens all the time you know. Like I'd see a girl with big boobs and think of Saby immediately cos Saby has an obsession with it. I'll spot a kangaroo and think of Homo_Escapeons cos he calls me Keshiroo :). I always see something that makes me think of each one of you. It's too hard to include all of you lovely people's names here (cos it would be a never-ending post then hehe) but I have each one of you in my heart associated with something beautiful. All you need to do is ask me what it is and I'll tell you now. And you can also tell me what things you come across in your daily life remind you of me :). Go on now, ask me and tell me too.

Today's music (one of my favorite songs ever) is dedicated to all of you lovely people who are always here for me - thanks guys and I will miss you for sure. Have a wonderful weekend and a week ahead, and I'll catch you next Wednesday hooroo!

Current Music: Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper

Runaway Spinster

There is this girl I know. She loves to love. I think she's in love with love. She wants to fall in love, she wants a sweet guy who can hold her tight, she wants the wedding dress, the cake, the car, the brides' maids, the wedding song, a wedding waltz, the whole darn thing. And she wants to have kids some day, be a loving mother, a sweet wife, become a private pole-dancer for her husband ;-), be a woman who can give anything that her man needs etc etc yawwwwwwn etc. Too rosy? Rleax cos it's over. Right now she's going out with friends and she does get asked out too. And sometimes when she goes out with a nice guy for coffee and then when he wants to take it to the next level...she freezes right there - FULL STOP! Heyy hold on, what did you want? To get cosy with me? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....she dies a sudden death then and there. And suddenly she's not even in his planet anymore.

Ladies and gentleman she's none other than Keshi. It's me guys hehe. Yes you're right, I think I have issues. I think I'm over the top with my freedom that it makes me run away from potential partners. Actually even before running away, I have Fast-Forwarded the scene in my head and I have frozen the reel right there. So I know what to do. I read a similar excellent post on Amy's blog and that's when I realised that I'm not alone. Cos before her post I thought I must be a wierdo that no one wants to know. So thanks Amy for bringing that up cos it puts me in the 'Normal' category - hey Amy it may be just you and me, but 2's better than 1 right :) .Yeah so what is it that makes girls like me and Amy suddenly become marathon runners when guys they meet wanna take it to the next level? I think it's the liberties we have right now that don't wanna make us compromise. Is it a compromise? Well maybe it is I don't know. That may sound like we are a tad selfish or even afraid of r'ships, but it's really not like that (ofcourse there are times when some men scare the hell out of me that it makes me wanna spray Mortein on them). But think about it this way. I have many married friends who are suffering in silence. While few of them appear to be truly happy in their marriages, some others are basically putting up with it. Man, woman, married, kids, fights, boredom, clashes, divorce? No maybe just put up with it. Cos they just have to. Why? Either cos they have kids/shared assets and its too complicated/costly to separate than to stay together OR they are of Indian/Sri Lankan origin that glues them to a marriage for life even if the husband/wife is the Oklahoma bomber. Cos in these cultures divorce is unacceptable and something that's seen as terrible. So there goes your whole life. I don't mean to say that ALL the marriages are fake - I'm sure there are thousands of people who have found their soul-mates and are absolutely happy in their marriages and are now probably thinking Keshi is just all sour grapes. But there's also a whole lot who are disappointed and have no way out. It's happening right in front of me and that disturbs me. I mean what if I fall in love with the wrongest man on Earth and then it becomes too late to get out? I know its all in the risk but is it really worth taking that kind of risk? I know that love is blind and when the right one comes along I might not feel this way and not even run like Roadrunner (I might actually melt in my chair that he might actually run away). But but but...what about Shilpa that I met in the neighborhood who THOUGHT she found the perfect man 10yrs ago, got married to him, had 2 kids with him and now that VERY man is treating her like shit? That is a true story. She cries every single day and my mum and I comfort her most of the time. She's stuck in this horrible marriage cos she doesn't want her kids to suffer and being unemployed, she's helpless. What about the risk that she took in trusting her heart about that man? It went wrong and it very well can go wrong. And what about my aunt and uncle who fell head over heels in LOVE (yes love) with each other, got married, had 3 kids and are now constantly bickering at each other? They don't even sit and talk for even 2 mins! And there are some young friends of mine who are married (maybe for about 5yrs) and still advise me not to get married. One husband is flirting around with so many other women - and yeah that friend of mine initially fell in LOVE too. Eventually are all the sacrifices and the compromises really worth it when it comes to your freedom? Why can't people be in love without bringing law and rules into it? Does love require promises and vows? Or do those very promises and vows make love less than what it really is? Would Shilpa and my aunt have been happier if they didn't get married? It must have been love back then but it's all over now isnt it...and why is that?

Right now my life is good as it is and I really can do without heartbreak. Though I miss the tender lips of a man on mine and my lips are eternally cursing me for it, there's no other need right now hehe (Gawwwwd I'm dying to kiss!). What will I be in 5yrs time, I don't know. But right now I don't wanna be married cos everyone else is. A sweet romance would be nice though but maybe he and I can just dance, kiss and play like kids without taking it any further - without even knowing each others' names or families or any other details. Will love be forever then? Cos the moment we take it to marriage level, that love seems to turn into obilgations. Or it maybe I still haven't met the angel who will take me by his wings and give me all the love I need OR it maybe that I haven't met the devil who will charm me with his magic spell and later on make me his ironing board. I know that either way the risk has to be taken to know what it'll be like. Or shall I just run?

Current Music: It Must Have Been Love by Roxette

Take A Load Off

Guys what do you do when you hurt someone? And if someone else hurt you, how do you forgive that person? It's hard isnt it. Most of the time you just can't take away the hurt caused cos the other person is not willing to understand/forgive you. Sometimes it's hard cos nothing you do would really take away the hurt (maybe the hurt caused was too big). What do you do then? As much as others have hurt me in many different ways in my life, I'm not afraid to admit that I have hurt others too. That makes me human but surely it doesn't give me an excuse to continue doing so. We all hurt each other (intentionally or not) but we must always learn lessons from each of our mistakes in life, so that we don't cause the same kind of hurt again. And when we do hurt someone, what's important is to realise that we were in the wrong. Alot of people go on trying to defend themselves even when they were the ones who caused the hurt. I have done that too. But later on I have realised that I was wrong - and that realisation is very important. We get carried away with our ego/pride that we don't want to admit we are wrong, even if we were truly wrong. Ok why all of this on Mon morning? Cos I lost it with my mum last night and we had a small argument. So I switched off theTV, stormed out of the living room and went to bed straight away. That was my way of dealing with it. And I usually don't go to bed like that - cos me and my mum are like best friends and we chat for a long time every night before going to sleep. So last night I couldnt sleep at all. And why couldn't I sleep? Cos I WAS WRONG and it felt like I was a whole lot heavier than usual! And I shouldn't have gone to bed without making up with her. I was feeling very uncomfortable cos I was thinking what if something happened to my mum tonite and I never got to say Sorry! I know that's extreme worrying but you never know right? So I wanted to get up and go to her bed and give her a hug - I looked at the clock it was 1am and I know my mum would kill me if I go disturb her then hehe. So I didn't. I whispered a little prayer and went back to sleep. This morning when I woke up in a hurry, I ran to her as she was doing something in the kitchen, I hugged her from behind and I said 'Mum I'm really sorry for behaving that way last night!'. She was smiling and saying 'I know your silly temper, go now and get ready for work'. I had tears in my eyes. Aren't mothers always so forgiving? So why can't we forgive our friends this way too? Mostly forgive ourselves too. I know it all depends on the nature and the size of the hurt but if mums can always forgive their kids, why can't we have that kind of heart too? Saying Sorry and Forgiving...both has to be genuine though. It has to work both ways or your burden won't be taken away from both sides. Say Sorry for lies and see how bad you'd still feel. Also Forgive for lies and see how bad you'd still feel. Last night I was genuinely Sorry and I know that my mum genuinely Forgave me too. And that's why I'm so happy and feel relieved this morning. They say it's easier to forgive than to forget. That's true. But I think if you genuinely feel Sorry and the other person can genuinely Forgive, then it's easier to forget too. Why carry a load when you can take it off by saying Sorry and Forgiving each other? I know of people who are angry for years with each other over silly matters. It's crazy or what! Apparently long-term baggage can lead to heart disease and other physical illnesses. Now do you want that? No one wants that so why put yourself through trauma like that? Now I know it's not thaaaat easy to say sorry/forgive, but then think about it this way. Do you want to carry that kind of guilt/anger/hurt for so long even at the risk of your health? Do you want to carry that kind of guilt/anger/hurt to your grave? if you or the other person die before you could reconcile, what have you achieved? Chances are the other person is hurt as much as you are too. Everybody hurts, so let's realise that first.

Imagine carrying a heavy backpack on your back for life? How stressed you'd be and how badly would that load affect your health both in and out. By saying Sorry and Forgiving each other, trust me you'd feel like that massive backpack is taken off your back. That helps your body and mind to relax and as a result you'd be healthy too, so will be the other person. So folks, ring up that friend you hadn't spoken for a long time even if she/he may be the one who should ring you. Send a 'I'm really sorry' card to the person you hurt last week. Buy some flowers on the way home tonite to say how you feel about a loved-one at home. Give a hug. Take someone out for dinner if you feel she/he needs to be shown how you feel. And if you didn't get a chance at all to say sorry to/forgive that someone who's not alive anymore, say a little prayer and do something special in her/his memory today. Folks say your dues today. The wait is a weight.

BTW guys I saw REM perform this song LIVE when they were in Sydney couple of years ago. I was at the concert. It's an amazing song and they are an amazing band. Enjoy!

Current Music: Everybody Hurts by REM

Granny Craig

I had to write this post cos someone I love is rapidly disappearing into thin air because of a so-called 'healthy' diet (which ofcourse I think is a certified path to Anorexia). La Vida Loca's fantastic recent post about unhealthy diets reminded me of this girl I know. I'm not writing this to make her feel bad or to laugh at her. Trust me I love her and she's very close to me. And I don't wanna see her sick cos of some diet that don't make her beautiful anyways. That's why I want you to read her story so that if you're in the same track you'd realise that it's not really a fashion statement that you're making - rather a big blunder. (I have written a similar post long time ago - check 'butt it's beautiful'). My sincere apologies in advance if I hurt anyone through this post, but this is how I truly feel about extreme and crash-dieters.

She used to be a normal size 12 (perhaps a size 14 I'm not sure) and she used to eat without feeling guilty. She used to be happy, carefree and she looked fresh and healthy. And then came along some weirdo who told her she looked 'big' and that changed her life, for the worse I think. She immediately went and joined Jenny Craig's weight-watchers' program (which I have heard is ok to a certain limit). And in the months that followed she not only punished herself with tasteless fish-food but also went and bought a whole gym spending alot of money. Her house is full of gym equipment now. She followed Jenny Craig religiously for 10 more months combined with rigorous exercise. As a result she really lost tons of weight. At the beginning she looked good...more firm and healthy than she was before. She came to a size 10 which was great. I think this is where she should have stopped it and taken up natural ways to maintain it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that weight-watchers programs are bad altogether. It may be good until you lose the excess weight and then you have to be sensible enough to stop it there and continue with natural ways of maintaining that weight. But she didn't ease up on the diet after that, instead she continued like a Jenny-Craig-produced-low-fat-maniac and deteriorated rapidly by the day. Her face dropped, her eyes and cheeks hollowed, her very visible rib cage could be easily studied by anyone, her excessive skin started to hang from under her arms and worst of all she feared normal food! Whenever we ate rice/pasta (carb foods) in front of her she completely freaked out. Her tasty home-cooking also stopped cos now she survived only on program-supplied pre-packed food. She's a woman in her late 20s and she was now a size 8 going on size 6! Girls now when you're a full-grown adult woman (women of 25 and up), you really don't want to look like an under-developed teenager do you? You should be healthy, full and natural. That to me is attractive than a bag of bones moving around. And when you're an adult woman surely it isn't a fashion to look like a hungry Ethiopian who hasn't eaten in yonks?? She even mocked me for being a size 10-12 (trust me I fluctuate between the 2 sizes). I didn't mind her laughing at me cos I know what Im doing whereas she doesn't seem to have a clue about the damage she's doing to herself. She is lost in some craze to look like a walking-stick that isn't sexy anyways. And I think she is partly frustrated that she is obsessed by this diet and that she couldn't be normal anymore. That's why she was mocking those who ate normal food and didn't mind having sugar in their coffee. She takes Equal (saccharine-coated sweetener) with her tea/coffee. I read that artificial sweeteners such as Equal causes Cancer in long term use. I received a recent pic of her yesterday (no that's not her in this pic - she hasn't come to that stage yet but is surely on her way to it!) and she looked like a size 5 or even a 4! Is there even a size like that except for infants?? I don't know but she looked really sick. Both her cheeks seemed hollow and she looked extremely tired. Seriously clothes look better on a 'woman' than on a 'hanger' don't they! She didn't look like a fresh young woman anymore - instead she looked like a granny who's madly running after Jenny.

I can't advise her anymore cos last time I advised her she said I was jealous of her...helllo jealous? Hell na I'm not jealous. How could I be jealous of a woman who has no flesh in her body? I'd have to be a bone-specialist to admire her. Guys you tell me...do you prefer flesh-less and skin-only women or fleshy, healthy and bubbly women like Uttsy and Beyonce? :) Anyways I told her to beware of Anorexia and she didn't even know about such a thing - how ignorant can people be. Still she's not stopping on the diet. All of this to look like some 100yr old skeletal remains? WHY?

I really can't understand why some women fail to realise that their bodies are unique and beautiful as they are. I think most women punish their bodies cos the body is easier to change than the attitude towards yourself. If you have an over-weight problem then go and get some healthy advice from your doc and follow simple and genuinely healthy rules. Perhaps cut-down on certain sugary and oily food, let go of some unhealthy habits and exercise regularly - but never overdo anything. Everything in life should be done in 'moderation'. If you are so obsessed with looking thin to the extent that you miss out on having fun and having a life, then certainly you're on the wrong track. We were not born into this world to starve - we were born to live, eat and enjoy life. If you stand in front of the mirror and you have to try real hard to find your image, then you are in for some serious trouble. Life is too short to breathe weight-watchers and live on crackers. What matters most is if you are happy, sensible and healthy. I'm sure those who diet like this aren't really happy but they are forcing themselves to do it just to be thin and look like a model/actress who needs a good serving of steak on any day. A woman is beautiful when she's beautiful both in and out. To me outward beauty means being curvy, healthy, fresh and natural. And also if she's just beautiful on the outside and cant carry a decent and intelligent conversation (due to cranium depravation cos of hunger) and without fainting out of starvation, then what's the point in looking thin, thinner and thinnest? Where are all the full-figured beauties these days (like Sophia and Marilyn)? By crash-dieting you are putting yourself at serious risk and depriving your body of the nutrients it needs to function properly. I have heard of people dying from crash-dieting/binge-eating and some people end up as miserable anorexics/bulimics in mental hospitals. Don't ever let a diet ruin your life - you get only one life, so protect it. I hope my friend realises this before it's too late. Exercise your soul, do everything in moderation, be well and stay happy people.

Current Music: Stupid Girls by Pink

Someone Like You

Today is a very special day. It's the 20th of September and 56 years ago on this day a baby called Saby was born in India. And that baby had one big mission. That when he grows up to annoy alot of women on the net. And another was to have 200 manifestations of himself in 200 different blogs LOL! And he did that quite well. He has made me cringe in anger, made me swear at him, yell at him and even made me try to block his IP from my blog. Not because he was a bad guy but because he was very good at hitting people at the right places. I first met him as 'Julia' on IndiaTimes chat. Although it was a female name I kind of doubted his sex. Cos Julia typed alot of dirty jokes lol, and I know Indian girls hardly do that kind of thing. Then we became friends and I realised that this Julia was a man named Saby and that he was a real pain in the buttocks. Somehow I couldn't keep away from him. He had some magic and some charm. Perhaps he was a magician I dunno. But he really got me hooked. No he didn't praise me or make me smile all the time. What got me hooked was his genuineness and his honesty. He would tell you anything to the face. And you can cry all day about it but he won't change his mind. That really taught me something. That I wont always hear what I want to hear. Saby was the same to everyone - no favors just cos you are his friend. That quality I like alot about him. Some of my blog friends hated Saby and yelled at him. Some others even had major fights with me saying I should block him from my site. Some other friends dumped me cos Saby was a regular in my blog irritating people. Sometimes I deleted his rather over-the-top comments but some other comments are so real, so I published them. Even though I was highly annoyed by him at the start (the cat on the right is Saby and that's me inside the teapot), later I realised he's a rare gem that I have found. Saby is someone that alot of people don't wanna know at first but someone who has alot to teach you if you take that extra effort to get to know him. Saby has been my friend always. Through ups and downs, he was always with me and I can't forget that. Saby have I told you lately that I love you and I'm so glad I met you cos you made a big difference in my life. Now we are mates for life. Thank You and HAPPY BIRTHDAY mate! Have a blast HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

Today I dedicate this beautiful song to the birthday boy..it's one of my favorites by ABBA and I always sing this on karaoke :). This is for you Saby. Somewhere in our lives we crossed paths and made alot of special memories and I hope that many years later when we are old and grey, you'll still think of me. I know I will think of you.

Current Music: Fernando by ABBA

Saturday Night Fever

Guys I'm still living in Sat night. It was a FANTASTIC night - the best I ever had I could say. I'm so glad I went and I guess the man upstairs knew I needed a beautiful surprise and in a grand style it came. Now hang ten and let me first tell ya how it all went. First I cut my long long hair short and layered on Sat (1st pic). I needed a change. Mum liked it so no probs there hehe. Got myself in the best dress - a dress to kill/murder/mutilate wuteva. The black halter neck and the long black skirt I was telling you about (2nd pic). And then a bit of makeup (not too much) - just black eye-liner and a light touch of silver dust on my cheekbones, a dash of chocolate berry Revlon lipstick, long silver-stoned-earrings with matching waiste-chain and sexy black stilettos (boys I know you are not interested in this but that's few tips for the hot blog chicks here). What else would a girl need to look and feel great ha ;-). So 7 of us met at 6pm and off we drove to the venue (btw mum joined us too. She loves this band and she's a dance maniac just like me - anyone surprised? guess not). Oh I forgot to tell you what kind of concert it was. It was a concert of a pretty famous Sri Lankan pop group called The Gypsies (check out this Wiki link). They are on tour in Australia and this was their Sydney concert. I'm sure some of you may have heard about them already. They not only sing some very catchy and extremely popular Sinhalese numbers (for Baila dancing) but they also sing English, Tamil and Hindi songs. Now Surprise #1: One of the first warm-up numbers they sang was 'Hotel California'! Why the surprise? Cos I had put it up as my current blog music on Fri and was jaw-dropped when they sang it, whoaaa! I felt like it was for me and they sang it sooooo good. I thought about all of you then awwww. Surprise #2: Boys boys and boys ooo lala! Girls there were some very hot Sri Lankan dudes over there...goshhh I was thinking WTH I was doing all this time in Sydney LOL! Well not only were they hot, they were pretty tuned in towards my table ahemmm...cos I could see alot of guys straining their necks looking my way - poor dudes ROFL! Anyways when we were dancing non-stop on the floor (3rd pic), 5 guys asked me for a dance each. I managed to dance with all 5 without any probs cos they were decent and didn't cause any problems like last time. 3 guys asked me for my mobile number and I didnt give em cos I wasn't interested, but to 1 guy I did...lol now don't look at me that way cos we became good friends and that's all...nothing else alright? Surprise #3. Now THE BEST SURPRISE EVER- drum roll... .... ....when we were dancing in the front, the band asked me and one of my cousins to come on stage!!! I was jaw-dropped like crazy ...omg I coudn't believe it! Uttsy, Kath and Ish I was thinking of you guys just then cos you love dancing. And I rem Ish telling she has stage fright. But this Keshi didnt have any fright hehe. But I was shocked they asked us when there were so many hot girls around. LOL they must have been drunk? Anyways no they were not drunk but they wanted us both on stage for the final 3 numbers. We went in a hurry and BOY O BOY what a feeling up there on stage (4th pic)...it's just UNBELIEVABLE! The great band singing and dancing with us, the crowd waving at us, the lights, the excitement, the rock-star feeling...it's just beyond words guys! We danced on stage for 3 fast numbers and guess what...so many guys were taking our pics from their mobile phones! I must be on their mobile phones now goshhhh imagine that?? But I had so much fun I just can't express it in words. Cos that was the highlight of the night and we never expected it. Both of us were spellbound (partly cos it was a childood dream of mine too - I wanted to be on stage with a famous singer some day. Guess some dreams do come true ha?). I was totally FLOORED. Did you realise how many exclamation marks and caps I have used in this post...haha that explains how much fun I had. So when we came down to the floor after that mini 'stage performance' of our's :), some guys came to us and asked if we knew the band personally...ofcourse we didn't. And then some other guys came and asked if we were movie stars in Sri Lanka...hahaha that was so stupid. I guess they just needed conversation. One nice guy came and asked if I worked in the city...I said yes. And he said that he has always seen 'this pretty-thing moving'...those were his exact words LOL! Then I asked him if it was a bad pick-up line and he said no, and that he too worked in the city and it was true. So yeah I made alot of friends from the opposite sex that night ;-) and no my dear blog-men dun worry, I didn't fall in love with any yet :):). Just alot of fun and excitement, and that was enough to keep Keshi happy for a very very long time. Remember I said I wanna dance to forget...well that night made some beautiful memories I will never forget. Guys it was just AMAZING!

btw we took too many pics and I cant put them all up here. I have selected only these few...so enjoy! btw the menu included seafood, chicken, beef etc basically everything under the sun. And na I didn't get drunk - I never do. I had one glass of red wine and that was it - yeah I know, baby girl lol! Uttsy and Raj you should have been with me then I wouldn't have been too chicken to drink up a bit. Some boys were totally smashed but no one was misbehaving. This last pic is of me and Shash, my fav cousin sister - she's an angel in my life. As you can see most of my pics are with her hehehe. We are very close and she has never ever said anything to hurt me - she's always there for me too. I love you Shash! Now I hope I didn't bore you all with this very long post :) and guys I hope you had a great weekend too. At the moment I'm very busy at work so I won't be able to answer the previous post's comments as yet and check alot of blogs as usual. But I promise I will get it all done soon. So stay tuned ok. Thanks guys for all the great advice you gave me last week...cos it was well worth it - HUGGGGGGGGZ! Folks just live life King/Queen/Prince/Princess size ;-) cos we have today don't we. TC!

Current Music: Dancing Queen by ABBA

Room 367

Arrived at the hotel. She has a great smile. Hello how may I help you sir? You're in room 367 and here are the keys, enjoy your stay sir. Took the lift upstairs. A room quite pleasant. Hello reception I need help, my doors don't open and I'm locked inside! Hello Hello is anyone there? No one on the other side of the phone. Looking outside the window. Giant wild trees in darkness wanting to bury the loneliness, swaying to the breeze. Raindrops fall and they seem to hum a sad story of a long lost girl. A creaking sound of a door opening. I suddenly notice a side-door that leads to the balcony. Through the half-opened door I see a young girl in the balcony standing and staring into the deep night. Long black hair that reached her hips. Eyes that spoke volumes with tears dancing. Hands slender and pale. Wearing a white veil but jeans on. She seems to be in despair. Holding a letter in her hands. Suddenly she turns towards my way. Comes running to the door with her arms stretching out towards me! I shut the door so hard. Trapped inside in sheer terror. Who is she. I look again through the keyhole. Yes she is that same stewardess! The beauty who lead me here and trapped me in? What is she doing here. I shiver in fear. I open the bedside drawer. A newspaper article that reads 'Permanent Guest In Room 367'. I faint in shock. Wake up in about 2mins. And she's sitting on my bed! I run to the door. She laughs so loud. I try to open the door and it finally opens. I go down the corridor and reach the lifts. The lift doors opens and she is in there making loud sobs! I run back to the stairs and arrive at the desk somehow. Thank God, I wanna go home now. The same stewardess is there again?? She looks up and says with a smile 'I'm sorry sir checking out is prohibited - you can never leave'.

Guys this is just a short story I wrote partly using a real story that happened in a haunted hotel in Queensland. A chambermaid who committed suicide (out of a lost love) seems to haunt that hotel and seems to want to mingle with the guests. I don't know how true it is, but alot of people have seen her and was a pretty famous story. Apparently she's still around. Anyways I never really believed in ghosts until I really saw one in an apartment I once rented. I have blogged about it before, if interested read here. Any spooky stories to share?

Concert Update: With all your words of great encouragement and my $80 that should not be wasted at all (considering that so many kids are hungry in Ethiopia), I'm going to the concert, yes! Thanks guys for the advice MWAH! It's on tomorrow night and it's a combination of Salsa and Rock n Roll music with dinner and dance. I'm going to dance alright...to forget alot of things in my life. Yes I'm going to have fun and I will make sure I wear the sexiest outfit tomorrow...my black halter-neck top and long black skirt. This little go-getter kitten is close to what my spirits will be like tomorrow - it's raining men, hallelujah!

Now check out this LIVE version of one of my fav songs ever. Hotel California. It also kind of goes with my post so here it is. And hey have a good one folks!

Current Music: Hotel California by Eagles

E-Life

I think life in 20 years time will be mega electronic that we would not even realise we are made of flesh and blood. Even doctors will be jobless cos we might have drive-thru hospitals where you can get yourself checked as you drive and then get some medicine at the next stop and off you go - and even go through coronory by-pass surgery done by a robot while you're at the driving seat! Poor IT people like us might not be needed either. We might be sitting at home when bots start programming other bots. What about Police? I don't think we'll need em either. Cos with rising technology there may be less crime - people may email a murder than really kill with a knife. And the good news is we may not even have terrorism cos if terrorists were to fly planes into building, we may have buildings that bounce back such planes back and forth between buildings - boink, boink, boink...and back to landing cos the terrorists got so bored with it. Do you think we'll need any restaurants...no, cos we might have e-restaurants where we all sit and video conference while we eat our own lunches from home. We may even have pizza delivered through a fax machine - imagine picking up a pizza through your fax machine - neeeeeeeeeee neeee neeeee Pepperoniiii! What about greeting cards? I guess not. Cos we wouldnt know what a post-box is! Would we have pets? Guess not cos we already have e-pets online so no need to buy kitty litter people. Anyone wanna say what kids will be like in 20yrs time? They wouldnt even need platser and dettol cos soccer is only played online. How about music? Would we have to buy anymore ipods or would we just have a nano installed in our ears that gets activated by the need? What about grocery shopping...maybe not - cos we might have replaced our meals with one big pill name 'Food' that's taken every 4hrs. Would there be a milkman anymore - guess not cos a mean-looking robot drives the milk van these days. And where do you think people would go for holidays...there'll be '5D' movies of holiday spots where you can get inside the movie reel and be there in a jiffy - no need to travel at all. And come back home just by jumping off the screen. Clothes anyone? Probably only when you feel bored. Makeup girls? Maybe not...cos you'll be dating and romancing a Chat-Id. And how about for those girls like me who don't have a partner yet..well I might even have an e-husband. Gosh that's so much easier than having to deal with the real mess ROFL! What about Family time - family members may txt each other to give a hug - sigghhhh! And what about God...He could be already brushing up on his .net and C# skills and even have a Blog of his own. He might even change his slogan to 'JAVA thy neighbor'. I don't wanna see the dawn of 2020, seriously LOL!

Check out the lyrics of today's music...it says all I wanna say through this post. Have anymore bright 2020ish thoughts?

Current Music: I Wish I Was A Punk Rocker by Sandi Thom

The Original You

I had a shitty weekend. Major argument on Sat and decided I wont go to this musical concert on Sun - doesn't matter if I lose my $80 on it, I JUST WONT GO. Some people just don't know how to talk and don't know their limits with words. Such words are lethal to the system. So yeah I wont go. When I'm affected I'm affected so let me be. Till you realise what you said was plain cruel and downright ugly, I won't ever talk to you again. Don't always expect me to be a puppet on strings. This time I just cut the strings and now I'm lifeless in your play. Get that.

Now to the post. How do you usually indentify/introduce yourself? Doesnt matter who the audience is, just imagine this situation. You are given a microphone to say who you are. Alot of people will start with their origin - fair enough you've got to cherish where you come from. But are you really only that or many more? One of my friends always say 'I'm an Indian girl, very traditonal, I have a culture to preserve...etc' and I used to ask her this. Shelby are you really all Indian? Cos we are in this imaginary world sometimes forgetting the fact that though we are Indian/Sri Lankan/Chinese/English/Aussie/Canadian etc by origin, that we are really many more than just that. Have a look at this example of an Indian girl. Since the day she is born, she is brought up to believe that she is 'Indian'. That's true, by birth she is Indian. And she lives learning the Indian traditions and ways. But deep down she can have many other characteristics that may not necessarliy fall under the label 'Indian'. Is that a crime? I think not. Cos that's who she is. I'm a simple Sri Lankan woman when I'm in a Buddhist temple, I'm a fun-loving American woman when I'm at the pub with friends, I'm a sport-loving Aussie woman when I'm singing 'Waltzing Matilda' at the Olympics with friends, I'm a seductive Arabic woman when I do belly-dancing with my Turkish friends, I'm a family-loving Greek woman when I watch TV with my mother and aunt instead of going out with the boys, I'm a fashionable Italian woman when I fall in love with Dolce and Gabbana, I'm a gracfeul Indian woman when I wear the saree and light the lamp, I'm a hardworking Asian woman when I'm at work earning my dough, I'm a daring English woman when I'm bush-walking in the loneliest forests, I'm a tough African woman when I'm facing the harshest droughts in life, I'm a Russian ballerina when I put my dancing shoes on, I'm a sexy Brazilain woman when I'm at the beach in my cossies, I'm the carefree Islander woman when I'm with nature. I have every trait and I'm every woman. What matters is being who you are, not labeling/branding yourself to be one thing just cos of brand-loyalty. That doesn't mean you should be someone else, but it means don't be forced to hide what you are based on a passed label. Be proud of your origins but never let that loyalty cost you your originality.

I dedicate today's music to the best-known Australian ever Steve Irwin. Tears well up whenever I think of him and this time it's no crocodile tears. I don't think I'll ever get over Steve's death . He's one rare man who found his reason in this life. Guys I know that everyone dies, but Steve was not everyone.

Current Music: The Reason by Hoobastank

Rewind And Unwind

I wanna move on...I wanna be happy for the memories...I wanna smile for all of you...so yeah Happy Friday is here guys and it's quiz time. So here it is:

If your life was a movie and you could rewind your life's DVD,

1.What GENRE of movies would your life-so-far be Action/Adventure/Comedy/

Drama/Fantasy/Horror/

Mystery/Romance/Thriller?

2.Which would be the BEST scene in the movie of your life-so-far? (Don't say it's yet to happen. I'm talking about what has happened so far).

Ok so there you go...a bit of fun for the weekend and something to ponder upon - have you really lived an interesting life so far. Enjoy and have fun guys!


My answers:
1.What GENRE of movies would your life-so-far be?
Drama (Me being the biggest drama queen there ever was! I can make a movie out of a mossie bite.)

Adventure (I'd just try out anything I have the desire for. Nothing can stop me)

Comedy (cos I laugh alot. Even when I was in thick mud after I slipped and fell down into a pit recently and hurt my back real bad I was giggling so loud.)

2.Which would be the BEST scene in the movie of your life-so-far?
... ... ... ... ... OMG I have none :( ok ok let me think. Alright it's not the many prize-givings I was at, it's not the Uni degrees, it's not the career achievements, it's not that full-on kiss with my ex etc etc. It happened when I was only few months old. Apparently I was seriously ill with measles and some other viral infection. I was admitted to hospital and my mother had to sign off some medical documents declaring that the doctors were not liable if I die. It was that serious. My mum said that she was crying every minute of those days thinking she'll hear the bad news - that I didn't make it. Apparently I somehow survived (Im here alright:)), and I was brought home. Then I did something crazy the very next day - I stuck a fruit seed in my nose! Maybe I was too bored with toys or maybe I had a crush with one of the docs at the hospital. I was hospitalised in the emergency ward again and yes I survived again alright. I wonder what the doctors thought about me - some crazy baby who wants to experiment with her body all the time hehehe. I find that scene of my life depicting the true spirit of me - an adventurous, funny and a strong survivor with alot of drama in her life ofcourse :). What about you?

Current Music: The Man Who Sold The World by Nirvana

Fake Reality

Why is it that often a person's worth is felt only after they're gone?

Why do we gather so many materialistic needs?

What of these bonds when at the end of this life you can take none with you?

What's the purpose of this life when it's really only an illusion?

Where do people go when they die?

When will people learn to say nothing if they don't have anything good to say?

Why is it that tears are sometimes just not enough?

Is life always beautiful?

If there's also emptiness then what's so full about life?

Where is my home?

Why do people follow often and not lead?

Do I have a meaning?

Is God a mean guy who takes the good ones early?

How do people somehow move on after someone is gone forever?

Is selfishness the only real survival trait in humans?

What is so great about life when it can end in a second?

What am I earning for?

If I die young what of all the things I wanted to be?

Why do I feel so much pain?

Why do I feel that everything is just so fake?

Why cant I move on?

What are we looking for?

Current Music: Tourniquet by Evanescence

Devastated!

So a mere stingray took Stevie's life. He handled far more dangerous animals than that - large crocodiles and venomous snakes. But this true-blue Aussie legend never feared those animals or death. He continued doing what he loved the most and he was truly a free spirit. Larger than life Steve Irwin was a great ambassador for Australia and will be sorely missed! What a huge loss and it's a pretty big shock to the whole of Australia and the world. Poor Stevo you died doing what you loved the most. We need more people like you in this world. People who enjoy who they really are and do what they are meant to do on this Earth. Cos alot of people do what they are told to do but you were different. Stevie you did so much for this country and the world, educating people about animals at the same time entertaining all...and even if it meant risking your life you were more than happy to make others happy. A short 44yrs but what a full and complete life! If I had half your passion I could safely say my life was full. Only the good die young. Crikey you will be terribly missed mate!

Steve, from all of God's creatures, THANK YOU!

To All The Beautiful Women Out There...

When a girl is beautiful she's not just an object...she's not just a show...she's not just a colorful parrot at the top of a viewing queue...she's not cheap and easy...she's not proud and expensive either...she's not a user...she's not just a pretty face...she's not shallow and she's not dumb...no she does not have EVERY reason to be happy either. No she doesn't find love so easily the way you think...neither is she the wonder-woman. She's not vain...and no she's not always that lucky as you may think. She's blessed with good genes but that doesn't mean she's just Looks only. She can be much more beautiful than that and yes she can be really valuable too. Cos she too can have a beautiuful heart and soul. What matters is if she lived through great difficulties in life, fighting her battles hard and facing the adversities courageously. So please don't judge a girl by her outward beauty and think that she lives in paradise. Cos outward beauty does not always mean eternal happiness, sound health and never-ending glory. Remember that the pretty Lotus blooms in the murkiest places - likewise beauty can be born and reside in the harshest environments. There may be some women who use their beauty to control others and who are shallow, easy, cheap etc, but not all beautiful women are like that. I'm done for the day guys!

And a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY to BEAUTIFUL, BRAVE and SMART woman Amu for the 1st of September! MWAHHHH sweety!

Guys I just got the news that the Aussie crocodile hunter Steve Irwin was killed by a stingray barb today. So long mate! Guys I just hate today.

Current Music: Life For Rent by Dido

A Better Death

I'm sure many of you have seen this pic before. This is a pic of a man jumping out of the World Trade Center on that fateful day (9/11/2001) in New York. Back then this picture had me in total shock for months and even now I still haven't gotten used to it. Everytime I look at this pic, I feel a fresh sadness for that man (and the the rest of 200+ men and women who were forced to jump to their deaths that day). This pic is a very special pic in the sense that alot of journalists later tried to find out the identity of this person but didn't really succeed. More than that, what this pic tells me is whoever it is, he shows true courage and grace even at the hands of death. Look at the way he is falling. So quiet, peaceful, full of grace and strength. It's not what death is portrayed to be. We all have this fear within us when we hear the word 'Death'. But he doesn't seem to be fearing death, neither is he screaming or struggling. He's just quiet and down he goes, down, down, down to the hands of something that'd handle him 'better' than the raging fires inside the building. He still shows hope, absolute stillness and a 'better' choice of death for him at that point of time. I know that there are(were) many people who suffer(ed) around the world because of terrorism but this kind of death is beyond imagination. Where one is forced to commit suicide! I find it difficult to even imagine his horror and pain when he had to make that ultimate decision of his life, perhaps within 10 or 15mins and that too just to die?? Just imagine facing a situation like this where you're being 'executed' (for nothing) and you only get the choice of the way you die (as if that's any comfort). I think in that kind of situation I too would have done what he did 'cos I don't want to burn alive. Human courage is immeasurable. What would you have done if you had no way out of that building that day?

Since it's getting close to the rememebrance of that fateful day and it's many victims, I'd like to dedicate this post to all innocents who perished on 9/11...to all those who had nothing to do with this stupid war but had to pay the ultimate price for it...to all those who's cries went unheard till their last breath...to all those who left their loved-ones behind right in front of their eyes...and to Joanne Ahladiotis. I know Joanne's cousin and we became friends after 9/11. I had to reach out to someone, to share their pain so Joanne was my choice. Joanne was only 27 and worked as a Systems Analyst for eSpeed, Cantor Fitzgerald on level 104- similar to what I do and her personality sounded alot like mine too. She left her beloved mother and sister behind. Apparently on that day staff at her office were getting retrenched . She had told her mum the night before that she was in fear of losing her job. Instead she died that day. Life is as fragile as that drop of water hanging from a leaf. The sun and the moon are forever but you and me are not. Never forget that Joanne was here.

Current Music: Hello by Evanescence