Friday, March 27

Every Road Leads Me Back To You...

Stay, forever who you are
Don't change a thing
Because you're perfect...
You sway, gently in the breeze
In between my dreams
It kinda makes me nervous...
Your storm, is lightning striking down

To only strike me once,
Would still be worth it...


With all my highs and lows, I'm perfect. Just the way I am right here...and to be back in your arms again, I'd even risk my life.


Finding My Old Piano...
No you're not dreaming. Don't try to wake up cos you're already awake. No this is not the ghost of Keshi haunting you from the depths of her blog. This is indeed Keshi in real, and back after a month's break :). Yes I had to be back sooner than I thought I'd be, cos I just couldn't tell myself to be something that I wasn't. Can you stop yourself from being who you are? Can you try and burn all your passions and bury your love in a shallow grave, way before it's time? I can't. I tried but I failed miserably. Writing is my passion...and the intellectual and emotional connection I have with all of you here, is my love. I couldn't watch them both fade away into oblivion and do nothing about it. Writing, learning, expressing, connecting, growing and reaching out to people from around the globe is my soul purpose on Earth...I have nothing else in my life that makes me more content than that. My most precious dream in life isn't about getting hitched in a pretty dress or getting a big house or making it to the top in my profession. My ultimate dream in life lives in my expressions...and that is this blog. Cos this is where the core of my soul lives...this is where the images of my heart are on display in the form of posts...this is where the cries from the depth of my very being are heard...my blog is my spirit. So, how can I shut them all up? I must have been very low when I left. Please forgive me for making you all so very sad by leaving, but I'm back now...and now my spirit is as fresh as clear waters from a brook, cos in the last few weeks it went away to the wilderness, talked to the birds, trees, lakes, the sea & the sand, the sun, moon & the stars...and realised it's full potential. And yes, my spirit is in pretty good shape now. Just like a musician who hasn't played his piano in a long time, now I'm dusting and cleaning the instrument behind my passion, and I look at it with a renewed love...


In Between My Dreams...
Margie and Soul, my dearest mates have been writing to me almost every single day since my last post, and have been lifting my spirits in every possible way they could. They didn't pressure me to be back here, instead they accepted my decision about wanting some time away from blogs...but they just wanted to know how I am, and I must say they are real angels. Arv, Nikhil, Jeevan, Hobo, Amit, Anuz, Sawan, Ankur, Kartz, Mayz, Illusions, Ria, Rat, Rakesh, Anitha...you guys never gave up on me...cos I received many emails from you, always wanting to know how I am and when I'd be back. And all of you who commented in my last post, those who sent me txts and countless emails, and even first-timers in my blog and total strangers, lifted my spirits in ways that I cannot possibly finish expressing...cos all the positive energy you sent my way, made me think about my decision and return much sooner than even I myself expected to. So, a big THANK YOU to ALL of you who stayed in touch even though I was gone for awhile. It just makes me realise how much you care about me and you were not here just for the blog thing, but were true mates in this long and uncertain journey of my soul. Sometimes we fall on our way, and it's during those times you realise who your real friends are. I saw bright flashes of angels in between my dreams...I kept seeing your faces and I found my purpose again...


Tapping Into New Territories...
According to the Buddha, 'Letting Go' (Nekkamma parami) is one of the 10 Perfections that must be achieved in order to set yourself free from Craving and Suffering. It's also one of the hardest to achieve. Though I haven't perfected it *hell nah, I'm still into Manolo Blahniks et al ;-)*, I believe that I have learnt to let go of some of my deepest cravings here in Blogville...my most vulnerable habits...my senseless desire to be accepted...my once ever-growing expectations from people here etc. I have learnt that people change, act unexpectedly, behave the way we don't want them to, may hurt us, abuse us etc, but the power is in ME to be able to stay resilient amidst Change...and I shall remember and aim towards that always. When things don't happen the way you want them to, know that there's a new fulfilling territory inside of you waiting to be found, from that same unfulfilling experience...

Will visit all your blogs soon ;-) Have a great weekend guys!


Current Music: Perfect by Vanessa Amorosi