Monday, November 27

Perfect Illusion

NEWSFLASH: A guy who works with me but has never seen me in person in is love with me . duhhh!

There's this guy who has worked with me for over a year now. He and I just communicate via email only for work purposes. We have never seen each other and have never talked on a personal level even through emails. But last week he just asked me casually if I'm following the Ashes series (Cricket) and we got on to a nice friendly conversation. And then we got really comfy with each other cos he is a true gentleman and a lovely person, and I guess he found the same qualities in me. Then we wanted to see each other so we exchanged photos (after 1 whole year of not knowing how we looked like!). Girls let me tell you, he's a cute HUNK - my jaw dropped at seeing his pic hahaha! Dark-brown hair, tall and slim and very attractive eyes. I was like WTH was I doing one whole year not checking him out :):). And then we talked more - but only as friends. This conversation went on only for few hours and he's in love with me LOL! And this morning he emailed me asking me if I had a BF. And I said No to which he said that he's got a 'small' problem...that he's engaged to be married and that he's sorry if he lead me on. Guys now is that a small problem? LOL I think not. I said it's ok cos we are just friends. But he says he has strong feelings for me and that he and I would have made a great couple. HUH! I only talked with him as a friend for just one day and he's already changing diapers of our future kids?? OMG we can fall in love so easily :). So what about that poor girl who's to be married to him soon? I'm not a marriage-breaker so I wished them both well, and I told him that we have to be friends and there's no other way. He's sad now. I find it confusing. This is just attraction I guess but yeah maybe if he wasn't engaged I'd have taken it further, who knows. He said that he finds me really interesting, attractive and that I'm a really cool girl. That he hasn't come across someone like me before. Sounds all pinned up? I dunno. I'm lost. But I can't imagine being engaged and falling for another person in one day hehe. When you're engaged, you are apparently totally in love with each other, right? So how come he's like this towards me? To be honest, he's a decent guy and I know he's not just trying to get into my pants and I know he's not joking about his feelings for me. And guys I'm also a bit disappointed with my love-life cos each time I really like someone and hope for some spark in my life, he ends up being engaged or married or what-not! There are so many people around me but it is very rare that you can strike up a good conversation with someone and really be attracted to each other. So yeah, I'm a bit tired of being told 'I'm taken' after being shaken hehe. If I'm so interesting, so great to be with, beautiful, lovable etc etc how come I'm always on the run...on the run in the race of love without ever reaching that finish line? Perfect illusion it seems like.

Btw if this was the man engaged to me, I'd have dumped him then and there and through email, LOL!

So guys have you experienced something like this? Have you had feelings for someone else while you're in a committed relationship with another? Could this really be love? If not WTH is it? It could be lust but we didn't even meet to be on a lust-fest already. Is love an illusion that can come into reality only for a while and more than once?


Current Music: Heaven Help My Heart by Tina Arena

136 Cranium Signets:

southpaw said...

At times u can be on lust-fest without having met in person. If u really think he can be a good friend, try and find out whats the exact reason, he's surely having some sort of uneasiness with his current partner and incase u figure it out try and resolve it appropriately, if u do so neither u wud feel like a marriage breaker nor it wud affect ur friendship with him further and ofcourse the guy's misconception abt being in love with u wud be gone.

So guys have you experienced something like this? Have you had feelings for someone else while you're in a committed relationship with another?***Yes, infact many committed girls had the same sort of feeling for me and fortunately we managed to rectify the situation properly and not end up screwing our lives. And only coz of that i gave that piece of advice in the previous para...:)

Vivhyd said...

Hehe.. thats a very funny situation. actually its not really funny when u r a part of it!.. love has no boundaries.. try convincing the heart tht so and so is engaged or something.. well i do believe tht u cud fall for someone who is engaged.. whether u wud go ahead or not ofcourse is the quest. I have come across situations where love has come into the equation when not knwing the person too well as well as someone being in love with someone else.. well these situations need to be handled really well..

Anonymous said...

Hi!!

I'm from Mexico and I was going from blog to blog when I found yours.

About your post, I think that even if it is not love (and it could be!!) This guy you're talking about is not sure about getting married, and that's a very important decision. I hope you catch my point :)

Well, nice to find blogs like this one.

Xox

Anonymous said...

Sounds like bad news to me (him being engaged and hitting on you), but then again I'm bias. What is going to happen to my angel when she falls in love? :-D

I think you will get plenty of advice on this one. Batten down the hatches. :-D

samuru999 said...

Keshi honey
If I was the one he was engaged to ...I would have dumped him right then and there too...through email!

I think he has rather...
A big problem!
I really feel sorry for the girl who is going to marry him!
How can he be in love with you...
and her too?
I have been married for a while now
Keshi...and, I am thinking back on
my past before I married.
I was the type that was always true
blue...If I was in a relationship..
there could never be anyone else!
That is how I am anyway!
Always true and sincere!
I think if you are truly in love...
why would you be looking elsewhere?

I'm sorry this guy led you on Keshi...I would like to give him a swift kick in the a#@!
Really, I mean that!!!!

Do not fret over him...he is not worth it!

Here's a (((BIG HUG))
Maybe it will make you feel a little better!

I wish you were not so far away...
I would love to have you over for some B-Day cake...and coffee!
It is being served now!
My son is sooooo Happy!
He had a wonderful day!

Margie

samuru999 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
SCRIBBLEZ TO WAKEUP said...

Oh Kesh...This is a little pinch f salth after having whipped cream! Tht too only for a few secs...I have not had any such experience but others have told me they felt tht way about me...:)

ANyways you got a great verdict n u will get a grat guy, dont ya worry! :) Best ppl take time to find their best match u kno :)

alex said...

LOVE cannot be defined so.

Only you could say if it was love or not.

Loving is accepting another person and giving without expecting. Love is being not possessive.

So you need to find out for yourself.

Anonymous said...

Very much possible, men are supposed to be monogamous, right ? :-)
On a serious note, I believe that people, even if they are committed to one person, can have varied levels of feelings for another. But it is a person with low control who blurts out such feelings if he/she is in a committed relationship. Such a thing is not normally expected to be done except in TV/movies.
His fiancee would be well within her rights to slap him and dump him.

Anonymous said...

the guy is absolutely a jerk!! either he has some mental problems or he is going thru this insecure pre-marriage phase !!

once my ex had called up before her marriage and told me she feels the same way as before!! WTH!! LOL!!

but honestly this guy should not be playing around with you!! here's my suggestion - be careful even being friends with such ppl. for all u know after marriage also he might continue on with the "strong feelings" notion with you!!

azuka said...

I wouldn't exactly call that love. Sounds like infatuation [on his part] to me.

If he can be that fickle concerning a girl he's getting married to. Wold it have happened the same way if you were the one? Ask yourself...

Kumar Chetan said...

how romantic, I guess I have seen u r "Lovely" photos/images/pictures more than that guy. I am "again" in LOVE. :P
That guy needs some help. BTW, its natural for guys to fall in love 100 times a day. Happens with me when ever I see a WOW girl. ;-)

The Phosgene Kid said...

If you are looking for something that would last I do not believe hooking up with someone that is cheating on his future wife would be the best bet. Maybe he just wants to beat the rush and cheat now. You can do lots better. Two of the worst places to meet a future mate I can think of are Bars and the Internet. Call me old fashioned if you will but give the mail order husband deal a pass.

Ghost Particle said...

keshi my dear...I tink im in luvvvvvvvvv wit you...do you have a bf? Im engaged to my gurl called Miss Bloggy bt we cn do it w/out she knowing. :P:D

U seem to be stuck in all sort of crazy stuff there lady. Maybe its time for a bumber sticker saying, Man slayer, stay away!! :p

I never been in a rship, im a comitment freak...or maybe jst a freak. So i dont know, but all I cn say is dat dude is just after your genitalia babe. So either u kcik him in da nuts and give him a blue ball or jst show him sum wring saying u got married.

Ghost Particle said...

there were no pics keshi, coz like the plates were empty after that :D:D:D

bt sum of my old pics to the place r in the webshots like. Just click da fishing village,.

saby said...

And this morning he emailed me asking me if I had a BF. And I said No



DAMN Liar
u have more than a 100

saby said...

Love happens Keshi
if it was me in dat situation and i really meant wat i said

i wud have broken the engagement before i got personal with u

i wudnt want u to feel guilty about being the other woman

saby said...

If u find dat your marriage is a mistake

the sooner u break it off
the better it is for both partners

but dis guy telling u dat he loves u (and wont do nothing) is a dumb bloke

PrAcHi said...

Guys now is that a small problem?

Ofcourse not..

OMG we can fall in love so easily :)

Yes you can :). I don’t think if you have actually started loving him, but there must be some feelings. And that’s how love starts!

how come I'm always on the run...on the run in the race of love without ever reaching that finish line
Awww.. hugs.. God has arranged someone very special and a perfect match for you. It takes time to get all perfect things in our life!

Have you had feelings for someone else while you're in a committed relationship with another? Could this really be love?

Keshi, I have never experienced this, but I have seen my friends experiencing this! I can tell you that this can happen... I don’t know if this is love or what.. But this happens!

Is love an illusion that can come into reality only for a while and more than once?
Why not? We are human beings and we too have feelings. And we can not restrict those in the frame of once or twice! What matters is our decision at the particular time. Which decides what is right and what is wrong.. You have to restrict yourself there. Like you can love 100s of people in this world, but then when you commit someone, you have to be loyal with that person. no matter you love 100s of others after that.

saby said...

Is love an illusion that can come into reality only for a while and more than once?


if u ask me
all is MAYA


but love is a very strong emotion
dat can make u feel real miserable

if u r not with the one u love
the saddest songs tell of dis situation

she is not u - Elvis
i am in love with the girl (wife)of my best friend- elvis again



i will do my crying in the rain

Kautilya said...

Well... its only u, who have to find it out for ur self.. if its love or not! Give it a shot I say... u'll find it out for urself!

no one can help ya in this i guess!

Jewel Rays said...

Hmm..Ok..

This is really complicating gurl..been there and it really sucks. Don't really know what to say ??

Been there where a guy is committed to a girl . And we have been friends like for 3 years plus. And suddenly sparks are starting to fly. And when i say that we had to part. He keep wanting to know if i will be affected and stuff. its really hard and complicating. hm.. really puts me in a position to stand on two boats. i processed the situation and realise that i should really fly away before i get caught up too much . Hmm.. i believe that i did the right thing since he is attached to someone. despite knowing that we could move a mountain together and kiss each other till we die..haha! i can;t just stand on a ground and take a position that second me in his life. so yeah i said well its best to part. it was hard somehow and weirdly. but i did it. and i felt that it was right! haha! and somehow i know that if he was the one (which now i totally know he is not) he would return with no strings attached sometime. :) For now..I just know..that there is so much more to life that just the words he make us up with. Yeah it hurt much. but allowing myself to be manipulate with a man who did not hold his heart makes me doubt if he could really be faithful to me sometime. But yet its really complicating..how people fall in lvoe sometimes..Awww.. i don;t know..LOL. when the heart gets stuck...its really a question mark..?? haha:P

Hope it help ya somehow..

Stay away if he is gonna drive ya mind wild and not give ya a piece of his heart ..its a complicating piece of life..haha..:P

*hugs sweetheart*

Anonymous said...

guys and kisses huh?? *OVER RATED*, but must be great still:)
Perhaps once that void fills up you will enjoy other things that you are good at... all by yourself...i believe all this about freedom... free to choose the things we like people or otherwise... that might be called love too... and there is a log "sync" involved....
so, rather than worrying that there is none for me, i will be happy thinking that I did not end up with the wrong person.

Cheers mayt!

southpaw said...

Guess u r busy today! anyway, hv a nice day...

fergal said...

hi keshi - interesting!

from my own personal point of view, i really don't think i could ever truly fall in love with somebody without having met them in person - regardless of how many emails, letters, photos, etc., we had exchanged. i realise that others may have different points of view (at least in theory), but that is my perspective.

~

Anonymous said...

What surprises me is the fact that...if one is already engaged to be married..then how..just how can you even think of falling for another person...I somehow can't get over this...am extremely possessive.....
He might be a true gentleman..or watever..but like exchanging pics...starting n conversation..n then telling you about his engagement...

ohh Keshi..you don't run too much.....u just stand where you are...true love will def run towards you...:) besties always

tulipspeaks said...

its a tough one sweetheart.

i've been in this situation b4 and the best solution i could find was to run away from it. :( sounds like a coward but then, i didnt know what to do. attraction can be highly additive.

=ammu=

Kalpana said...

It's something like he got married and still have feelings 4 u. Does he not know that he is reserved for another person. Did he ever not chat with his would-be wife? I feel it is very strange. Once a person is engaged, his/her thoughts will flow around them automatically. Keshi, do be careful with this person when u deal with him. And don't worry, u'll get a wonderful life partner soon. There is no hurry. Some of these people do play tricks. 1 thing is that this guy is honest and said he is engaged. Luckily, u're safe. Be happy for that and be friends.

Anonymous said...

Hi Keshi,
Sometimes things just aren't going our way.. Just as we think finally its going our way, something triggers & happens unknowingly..
It's really heartbreaking at times.. But sometimes, Life isn't fair to all of us.. We gotta do something ourselves to make it fair..
Cheer up! At least you found out early tat he's engaged & he didn't lie to u..
Sometimes, love is just so "weird".. Nobody can explain why...

Rite?

SamY said...

** And then we talked more - but only as friends.

plz spare that keshi ... u always make such a statement just when things r heating up :p

** That he hasn't come across someone like me before. Sounds all pinned up?

proly not. I thought that was what love was about. statement that don't quite make sense literally, but r often said to express the intensity of a feeling when u just run out'a words. gosh #-o, thats so mushy mushy :p

** When you're engaged, you are apparently totally in love with each other, right?

proly not keshi ... it cud just be an arrangement nah?

LOVE is a big word keshi ... n it takes 3 things to make love - intimacy (friendship), passion (lust), commitment (relationship). the 1st two add up to whats romance. so how dyu define what u feel for this dude?

love in a day just sounds ridiculous to me dear.

** So how come he's like this towards me?

he feels needed just like you do :)

** on the run in the race of love without ever reaching that finish line?

everyone's worried of rat race n luk @ nutty :)) ... remember keshi? bout an aunt of urs / someone who said "without her man a woman is incomplete" @ that recent marriage u attended ... did u realize this is probably what she meant :) ... afterall she might have a point ... besides ur proly quite a family gal deep inside ;)

** Have you had feelings for someone else while you're in a committed relationship with another?

r'ship is too big a word to accomodate in my life ... for now ;)

** Could this really be love?

beginning? yes. but not quite it!

** Is love an illusion that can come into reality only for a while and more than once?

love is infinite keshi ... only time is finite :). a person can genuinely love many ppl, but I guess @ any point u can (ethically) only be commited to one :D.

I guess u feel like its a lost opportunity. Time will heal nutty. Atleast dun start having deep feelings for someone b4 u know if hes committed :D. I'v known bout guyz who r commited n yet dig gals. Guess this guy was a gentleman, so take it with a smile. All for the gud.

Cheerio

saby said...

the pic here looks very much like u
only she is a shade lighter

saby said...

heyyyyyyyyy Keshi
dont let dat get u down

black and brown is beautiful in the West

but unfortunately in India
the standard of beauty is wheat complexion for some and white for the others


me?,
i go for blue eyed blondes
and Margie

Kumar Chetan said...

At 3:32 PM, saby said..."
If u find dat your marriage is a mistake
the sooner u break it off
the better it is for both partners "
Wise guy

Anonymous said...

true picture of infactuation, ofcourse at its BEST!! :P

niki yokota said...

how romantic!!!
i think this kinda love is Great!!

Anonymous said...

Shoo him away asap.

This is something which looks really awesome like a beautiful island, but when U reach there u realize that there is not even a single toilet bowl.

The point being, three peoples emotions are on the bet here, yours, that guy's and his fiancee'.

Chuck him away. Nice people not always end up last, take it easy be patient and pray that things happen for the good.

Rena said...

hi, i just found your blog, well, in my opinion, this guy is playing with you...you can't trust him at all if you hardly know him, oh please, i am not saying that you're not interesting and nice to be with but my sincere opinion is that he is just playing with you so don't take it seriously, there's nothing you can do about it...regards from Mexico:)

Homo Escapeons said...

HEGEL said that everything is inter-connected and that nothing was unrelated...the truth is the whole...and Mr Cold Feet certainly wasn't telling you the WHOLE story on his little 'fishing' expedition was he now?
Hegel said that history teaches us that people have never learnt anything from history and this is proven by the actions of your Mr Cold Feet. Now be honest, what have you learned about men keshi..are there a few consistencies that you have noticed..hmmm..Ok time is up.

Mr Cold Feet may be a young fellow and nice as pie but he has suddenly realised that he is about to restrict his DNA disbursement plan and free will into the hands of one woman and it sounds liked he may have panicked. Having never met Mr Cold Feet I cannot pass judgement on his character but it would appear that it is a textbook case.

A He has left the whole bloody I am in love with you thing until the last minute which should sound all of the Alarms in your head..he could have told you months ago..HELLO!

B That he is not 100% committed to the future Mrs Cold Feet and she has a very big problem on her hands and you may not be the only recipient of his advances?

C RUN do not walk away RUN from this entire escapade because he may have just wanted one last fling before he hitched his horse... and because you didn't throw yourself at him he had to salvage the situation and appear to be a gentleman. If he needs an excuse to call it off then decide that IT WON'T BE YOU!

D He probably finds it easier to talk to you and could not possibly have a great communication line open with his fiancee..now every relationship starts somewhere..but if that starting point is deception..the precedent is set.

Yes His Story proves that you need to learn something from History and see the big picture...the truth is the whole...
have a lash behind you as you dash off at full throttle!

Don't you think that somebody ought to tell Mrs Cold Feet that her fiancee is in love with you?

Shiv said...

Long time Keshi!! hoz u???

twistedtruth said...

"How can he be in love with you...
and her too?"

Yeah, you can. And her too. Its like a perfume. A single essence does not round it off. Nor can the perfume last more than 8 hours. Then you need to apply more. And maybe add a new fragrance. People are not committed to themselves that's why they need committment :P

I say, go for it. So what if he's engaged? NOW MOVE! At worst, nothing will come out of it. At best, you could destroy his marriage, and save his soul.

A committed person needs to be in an asylum. Only the truly uncommitted can love. How the f*ck can you be committed and still say that you love? Wadda silly notion!

saby said...

look who is talking !
Chota Shaitan

Anonymous said...

Have you read my post on similar thoughts ?

I would love if your other readers also read this. It's just an episode with so many possibilities.
I was amazed to see so different views on the post, will continue the story sometime.

visithra said...

No matter how nice a guy - he was engaged yet he showed interest n lead u on - n that isnt nice

not worth it gal - if he leaves her for u - it shows how insecure he is n he can always leave u again for another

Anonymous said...

Been going thru the comments on this one...lot of sane advice there...u have a lot of ppl who care abt u :)

Agreed luv can happen anytime...anywhere...in any span of time...long or short! Luv can happen even without ever having met (before the internet, there were good ol’ letters and pen pals!)...

What worries me kesh is the fact that the guy’s in a commitment...or sum semblance of that @ engaged? Yet he says he’s fallin in luv wid u...possible yes but I’d say the real problem is there with the woman he’s engaged with...not a prob with her but a prob in their relationship! And m sure he didn’t get engaged just on a whim...they obviously shared sumthin. The question is was there a prob in their relationship that’s got him looking out of it? Or is it because you truly fascinate him and the feelings he has for u are strong and true enuff to make him wanna walk out of the existing engagement? Coz he really can’t be on both boats...he’s gonna drown and drown real bad!!!

What also worries me kesh is what’s on your mind? I know u value ur blog and us (blog frenz) and our opinions...but in love, there’s gotta be just you, your feelings and his...! The only thing influencing your mind should be your heart and not what anyone else thinks of the whole thing...or whatever experiences we may base our opinions on.

You have to figure out where u stand and where u want to be in this....no one else can and no one else should...!!! I hope u understand what m trying to say kesh...don’t get offended or take it otherwise sweetie...coz u know I do have your best interest in my mind and heart. If u were to get hurt, I’d be feelin hurt too but....

So speak out your mind and heart but to the person in question....if u are seeking answers seek it there and in urself...

*huggss*...tk care

ps: sorry i skipped the answer 2 ur question...this was gettin too long as it is :)...maybe l8r...

Eclipsed Thoughts said...

i was thinking if love happened even once?? haha... kiddin babez.

If i have to give my opinion on this, i would say, yes a person can fall in love with someone else even if he is committed to xyz. maybe thats what i consider the "liberty to love" and "chosen to love". might sound the same, but in fact different things.

Not much of experience, but i would say that if the guy loved you in one talk, yes he might love you trely. It doesnot take long to know a person. You dont have to know each other since years... you can just fall in love.. matter of clicking. Scientifically, its just the coinciding frequency matter.

Now, your case,,, its a difficult siutuation... coz he is "committed" and still cant help advancing to you. maybe he should clear out the matter first. Is he truely in love with the one he is engaged? was he just engaged coz he was not willing to "search" for love. Now, it is upto you whether you love him or like him. If he loves you, i think he would clear it out with the one he is engaged.

It would be decieving a gal if he was committed and yet feeling for someone else... let him be honest with you and the other gal... maybe its just a phase and will wash away but we should never be afraid of truth.

talk to him... straighten up all facts and feelings... and you should never feel wrong all along. Enjoy... and ahem ahem... cute hunk??? email me his pic... haha... lol kiddin.

Anonymous said...

**Have you had feelings for someone else while you're in a committed relationship with another?
N/A :) Always been a free bird looking at other birds... wondering how come Tom, Dick and Harry get a gal but not KK :)
I think its pre-marriage jitters for him :) Though engagement is done I think you tend to think a lot before a marraige. I hope it happens... not been there yet... :)

desperado said...

well maybe d guy is right..maybe he hasnt met someone like u and is attracted..n den started thinking about his present relationship..surely can happen...but maybe u can help him realize tht his fiancé is d right choice..so tht hopefully d 2 have a grt life ahead

n i thought such things happened only in movies ..hmmmm

oh btw coffee n grunge whole day wid u is d perfect option :)

Cinderella said...

I totally agree with GP.Though my verbatim is gonna be much softer ! Lol !!

Neway,I think crushes can happen at any point of time..irrespective of your age or relationship status,but as long as "..its just a li'l crush" (rem'br J.Lo ?)

Now, a man who thinks he is in love with another woman inspite of his being in a committed relationship,can never give the guarantee that he wouldnt fall for another woman in a later part of his life i.e after he has dumped the first woman for the second.

I once had a fren who intervened between the relationship of her fren cz her fren's boyfren thought he was in love with my fren. (Hope you got that.)
Anyway my fren thought she was doing justice to two lives atleast
(her and her fren's BF) by getting into an affair with the guy.
Well 2 years into dr affair and i stepped into my fren's life and came to meet her guy one day.Two dys later the guy tells me that he is love with me...imagine !!!???
I was so shocked and scared.But then I just decided to ignore his advances and make it look like a prak he was playing on me.
This continued for a year and a half untill the guy started threatening me that he would break our frenship if i dint say yes.
And it was then when I quit our frenship.Till date my fren doesnt know this was the reason for me breaking up with her not the personality clashes that she thinks to be.
And all along I was in a committed relaionship!!!!!
Had'nt 'he' been there I dunno how would I have managed all by myself.

SO just avoid him Kesh,lest he comes around to trouble ya like it happen with me coz i was unable to avoid him outright coz he was my fren's BF...!!

Take care.
Life can be dangerous at times.

Virus© said...

Interesting situation. Well, I would suggest you give it a try. [He ain't married, is he?] See it for yourself if it's true love or something and then make your wise decision.

[BTW why the hell did he fall in love with you if he was already engaged?]
Complicated.

And, yeah, me luckily never had any luck with the ladies. ;)

adi said...

heaven help u!!!

why do have to be such a cool cat, then it becomes difficult for we guys to, errr, forget some vital people in our lives...

:)

sorry, been some time since i came here.

Anonymous said...

I haven't encountered anything like this. The guy may be sincere, but he needs to be honest with himself.
As you said this was just attraction/lust and thats is all to it.
He may call it whatever. The girl he is engaged to better watch out.

Cari said...

keshi...i think it's wanting to fufill a fantasy..maybe...bc as humans..we think...too much sometimes!..we think about what we don't have...what would be nice to have...and forget to appreciate what we have!

i for one believe in true love...still! why? because I am a person who is hanging on to my values and beliefs...

the other day...a man started to strike up a conversation with me...he seemed like a nice guy...and because I am a pretty friendly person...I continued to talk

i started to feel akward when he wouldn't take hints on me having to go though...

he kept following me and trying to talk to me at the same time...i found that a little strange...

to make a longer story short..he tells me that he would like to take me out to a movie.and i looked at him..w/ a strange look..bc...i already told him i was married...and even on a friend basis...i don't know him!! like that....just saw him at the store and we stroke up a simple meanlingless conversation right?

apparently to him...he thought that was me turning on the green light...NOPE!

he tells me that he doesn't really care for the whole marriage thing...i was really suprised! i couldn't believe my ears...

i told him...well I DO!!! he said oh....

to him...maybe he just moved on and tried again w/ some other chick...most likely actually!!

but for me...it made me see how rare of a quality loyality is...
i think that if you are going through probs w/ ur significant other the least u can do is tell them before you pursue anything..

attraction will always be there though...that is going to be something that we have to accept from one another...

i still get attracted by other men....why the heck not! some of them are amazing!! :} haahah

i think it's how far u take that attraction though...bc...sometimes u take that attraction and it starts to become a fantasy or...the person simply wants to make into a reality...

sorry so long! but i am passionate about my views :}

saby said...

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.

Charles de Gaulle
more Famous Quotes

Shionge said...

That's why they said love is blind Keshi....but as what you reckoned this man has a serious problem being committed to the one he's about to get engage with ya?

This is so sad.......*sob*

Anonymous said...

wow, tht is quite a situation hney.. but like rachel in friends says.. once a cheater always a cheater.. not that he cheated on his fiancee, well maybe in his mind he did.. but u get the drift right?
have i experienced anythg like this .. oh yeah.. i was in a waning relationship and i believe the cause to be my ex bf's wandering mind. hmm. all this aside,how've u been?? ;)

ann said...

{{{Keshi}}}

He had no business leading you on... friendship is one thing, but falling for you when he has an SO is out of order. He is not such a nice guy, trust me.

He needs to re-evaluate the relationship he has... his love for his future wife sounds pretty precarious to me... how painful for her to find out what a jerk he is.

But this is a guys thing... look at the numbers of broken marriages due to infidelity.

I don't understand it... I never will

lotsa luv ann xxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

It's like this girl..

the more you think think think about someone, the more the brain thinks that that person is THE ONE.

It ain't love, it ain't lust, it's just the head up there that plays tricks.

Jo said...

Did he have this going on for you for a long time? If so and if he is committed in another relationship, this guy needs to check his head. And make sure he is just not trying to have a one-night-stand with all those kind words. :-)

Anonymous said...

Hi keshi,
you seem to be handling it well yourself..but friendships are friendships and its best to avoid grey areas..to avoid yourself being hurt..even if he truly loves you, is he strong enough to break an engagement with another girl?

jac said...

Don't brush it off easily, if you know that he is not a no-nonsense guy.

Must be a reason there.

I saw some one write about wheat colour and white colour as standards !!

Me...I love black, what is wrong with black ?

Shitrint said...

this sounds confusing...
:O
umm..i dunno but this thing that the guy says ands does just reinforces my opinion that most men are just "roving eyes".
i understand wat ur going thru and i completely commend u for saying that ud dump such a man if u ever happen to be in such a situation (like the unfortunate fiancee of this guy)!

id say if i were in ur place i wudnt pay much attention to this romeo. wat if u had been in the shoes of this guys girlfrend?

and i think that if one is in a committed relationship, one might feel attraction and infatuation for soemone else, but it takes a lot than just a photograph and a day's frendly chat to fall in love. otherwise its just, like u said AN ILLUSION!

dreaming-neko said...

*sigh*
some men will say and do anything... for a little somethin'

Meg said...

Its lust....and I agree with the comment that said if he really had honest and sincere feelings for you he would have broke off the engagement first. But, in my opinion, yes it can happen like this - he just needs to make things right before moving forward.

T/C my dear Keshi girl !

Anonymous said...

thats not nice

when i started reading i thought it was a pleasant post

Anonymous said...

Wow my dear..Ur writing skill is too good...Well iam going thru the same situation right now..Iam in a relationship rt now but also deeply in love with my Jaan..I donot consider it to be wrong..Since the sitations made me get close to my Jaan...I consider my love to him very very sincere and pure...Dont take me wrong..But...

Anonymous said...

Well I have never had feelings for another girl while in a relationship with one, but I have had feelings for a girl who herself was in a relationship (but you know that story LOL).

So if you want tips on how to break this guy and his fiance up, just let me know. I'm an expert now ;)

You could have been experiencing love. The real test will be to see if you feel the same way for him in a month or two. Are the feelings still there?

saby said...

Hellooo Keshi

and all u guys out here for darshan
i agree a little of Keshi in the morning is good for stimulation

of both mind and body (sex)

saby said...

Twisted truth has gott my mind all knotted in knots

wat the fuck is he saying??
cant he speak english?

Anonymous said...

Keshi can v chat..my id is kate_vijay_vimal@yahoo.co.in or angilasusan@hotmail.com

saby said...

wat the hell is a committed relationship ??

sounds like a cage
like marriage

marriages arent forever
love isnt forever

nutting is forever
remember Bob Dylan and ...

saby said...

every thing must change
nothing stays the same

there is nothing u can be sure of in life

except change
and death and taxes

with apologies to George Benson

saby said...

DAMN counter is stuck again
i hate moderators

and dat hate wont change for sure

saby said...

did someone call some one black??

saby said...

hehehe

laff and be merry
beauty is only skin deep

and boobs will sag someday soon
and tight asses will be flabby drooping asses one day

even if u r Jen Lo today

saby said...

ok i am gone
i guess i said enuff

or mebbe too much
i miss Margie

Anonymous said...

interesting post again,Keshi.
you must be that lovable and irresistible that a guy will fall on you for just a day :)

oh,well,we cant control our hearts.
i fell in love with a guy even im married,luckily,it was just a cyber(chatting),w/o a face to face contact,lol.it started with a net and ended thru net,too.but at least i felt that kind of love,haha!

goodluck to your lovelife :)

btw,i moved my site so pls kindly visit me here:

http://www.akoni.info

thanxxxx,Keshi!! muahhhh!

ghee

saby said...

the only real feeling is LUST
it cannot be faked (by men at least)


if u have it
it will show

saby said...

OH SHIT
i hope Margie didnt hear dis

Keshi said...

Southy heyy yeah I was very busy yday :) Hows u?

Ur advice is GOLD wow! What u said makes perfect sense and it's a rel nice way to approach him w.o. being nasty. TY so much! I'm richer for knowing someone like u Southy really!

Right now Im a friend to him and no we haven't crossed that line. So yeah, I'll slowly find out what's bothering him. The last he told me was that he fights alot with his GF and then I asked if he really loves her..and he said yes but she drives me crazy sometimes. So yeah..I won't get into anything more with him...I'll be a friend and help him through. He needs to learn to love that woman no matter what and get married to her. I'll make sure that happens :) And ur right...then he might realise that he wasnt really in love with me hehe.

ty Southy HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Viv heyy!

I havent fallen for him hehehe. He has fallen for me. But if he wasnt engaged, I'd have taken it further...who knows. To be honest he's a very nice guy. A rare. I have met so many guys in my life but it's only with very few men that I could carry on a great conversation. He's one of them.

Anyways I won't do anything to seduce him lol! I'd keep him as a friend and guide him back towards his woman. He cant do this kind of thing when he's in a committed r'ship. He has to learn to control his feelings. So yeah...I'll make sure he realises that :)

tnxxx!

-----------------------------------


Masol heyy WC to my world and ty!


** I think that even if it is not love (and it could be!!) This guy you're talking about is not sure about getting married, and that's a very important decision.


true. He told me that just yday! :) So ur analysis abt him is perfect!

-----------------------------------

G'day Tre!

aww I know what u mean. Dun get me wrong, I aint in love with him...nooo ways! I cant fall in love with a man who's just declared his love to another woman when he's already engaged. I find that sad.


**What is going to happen to my angel when she falls in love?

I think I'll fly to the moon n back then :)

huggggggggz matey!



Keshi.

saby said...

i sure hope i been moderated

saby said...

He needs to learn to love that woman no matter what and get married to her. I'll make sure that happens

bs
TANK GOD u r not a marriage counsellor

saby said...

SOUTH

incase u figure it out try and resolve it appropriately, if u do so neither u wud feel like a marriage breaker

u cant break a marriage dat never was

u will be doing the girl a favor if u marry the guy Keshi

one day she will tank u for it

saby said...

i am just carrying out a conversation with u kesh


u dont have to publish
u r the only reason i am here

and Margie of course

samuru999 said...

Hi sweetie
I probably should not have said...
**I would like to give him a swift kick in the a#@...
Sorry Keshi!
He is your friend, and that was not really very nice of me!
I hardly ever say that kind of thing!
Hope you are not upset with me!

Margie

Keshi said...

Margie ty so much n huggggggggggggggz! I really appreciate u always being here for me and guiding me through all my chaos. U r a shining star in my darkest night!


**I would like to give him a swift kick in the a#@!

LOL! yeah. Just yday he told me he's always fighting with his GF but he still loves her. HUH!!! I think he's confused as hell.

Dun worry Margie...I'm OK. And I know what Im doing. Im not a shallow woman and I will never mess with a taken man. I know what that girl must feel like, if she ever gets to know. I dun wanna be a part of that kind of thing. I know my limits and I will always be a friend to him.

ty so much sweetie HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ! I wish I was there for ur son's party...wud have been just lovely!

-----------------------------------

Scribblez ty so much, ur a darl!

**This is a little pinch f salth after having whipped cream!

so true! Guess what...Im beginning to feel that way cos he's opening uo to me right now abt his r'ship...and Im getting all the hints and it sounds alot like salt after whip cream indeed!

thank God for my blogger friends like u here who gives me such wise advice.. HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Alex ty!

I know...love is all that but sometimes Im confused myself. sometimes it's so hard to tell what we r exactly feeling .

-----------------------------------

heyyy Ashish!

Men r 'supposed' to be monoganous right lol!


**But it is a person with low control who blurts out such feelings if he/she is in a committed relationship

so true. Controlling the mind is like taming a wild dog. And I guess he's a bit un-trained in that. Mebbe I can help him realise that and make him stronger.

ty!

-----------------------------------

Deepz heyyy!

**the guy is absolutely a jerk!! either he has some mental problems or he is going thru this insecure pre-marriage phase !!

LOL haha! Yeah ur right...there has to be 'jerk' genes to declare love to another woman when he's engaged already. That's really not fair on that woman.

ur ex did that? LOL omg! Im glad she's ur ex!!

Ur right...he can continue to say this even after he's married. So yeah I will keep my distance with him for sure. ty so much for being there for me!


-----------------------------------

Azuka heyy tnxxx!

**Wold it have happened the same way if you were the one? Ask yourself...

yep I asked that myself first...and thats what I remained as just friends with him :)

-----------------------------------

Kumar ur in love with me? awwwwwwwww :)

**its natural for guys to fall in love 100 times a day. Happens with me when ever I see a WOW gir

lol I so know that. Guys can be soooo vulnerable.

ty Kumar!

-----------------------------------

Phos heyy ur spot on!

**Maybe he just wants to beat the rush and cheat now.

I too think thats abt it.

Internet/Bars - But u never know. I have heard of love stories that started in these places :)

ty Phos!

-----------------------------------

Ghosty u honestly love me duncha? awww ty so much huggggggggggz! Ur right. He could be freaking out pre marriage. Im still finding out from him...he's telling me lots now. Looks like it's exactly what u said.


**Man slayer, stay away!!

LOL nice one. I really like that one. I might even really change my number plate to that :)

I'll keep u posted on this story. So stay tuned. ty so much Ghosty!



Keshi.

saby said...

Im not a shallow woman and I will never mess with a taken man.

there is no such ting as a taken man

i am married but not taken

saby said...

and I will always be a friend to him ???


how the fuck is dat possible?
he sees u as a lover

saby said...

women always want to do the right ting

but there is no such ting as absolute right and absolute rong

u will be judged by the context
mebbe allowing the guy to marry dat girl is the rong ting DUMMY

mebbe u marrying him is the right ting

Keshi said...

Saby heyy!

**DAMN Liar
u have more than a 100

awww cmon I dun have a serious BF do I? I mean Im not in a r'ship right now. ok then call me serial polygamist LOL!


Saby u say some of the wisest things. ty!

**but dis guy telling u dat he loves u (and wont do nothing) is a dumb bloke

hehe yes. But I guess it's not being dumb...it's being real shrewd. wut da ya think?

and theres no way I'd b the 'other' woman! NEVER. Not Keshi.

-----------------------------------

Prachi dear ty so much for ur wisdom!

**but dis guy telling u dat he loves u (and wont do nothing) is a dumb bloke

thats so true. Love can happen many times but it's matter of loyalty that keeps us in one place. Spot on!

-----------------------------------

Kautilya yes only I can find it out...and I think I have already. I'll let u all know what it is.

ty so much!

-----------------------------------


Amy ur sooo right!

**but allowing myself to be manipulate with a man who did not hold his heart makes me doubt if he could really be faithful to me sometime

thats so true. I mean he could do that to me one day.

btw I didnt know u had gone thru a similar situation. WOW it must have been really hard. But ur a smart and sensible girl and dealt with it in grand style. Good on ya girl Im proud of u!

I can never be a girl who broke someone else's enegagement. I can never let that happend and I wont.

ty so much lady HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Spj heyy :)

**, rather than worrying that there is none for me, i will be happy thinking that I did not end up with the wrong person

thats so true. And looks like this guy's GF has ended up with someone she can't trust. What d u think?

-----------------------------------


Fergal ur right. I cant fall in love with someone I have never met either. no ways! :)

ty so much!



Keshi.

saby said...

i have been called the devil's advocate

i advise business man how to bend the laws

but gandhi-ji once said paying taxes to a corrupt govt is a sin

or something to dat effect

saby said...

u mean a bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush?

do u tink dis is wat the guy is tinking?

i dont tink so
in the West guys dont have to marry for sex

it happens in india though
i did

i repent now

Keshi said...

Ektaran mwahhhhhhh!

ur right abt him. I cant do that either.


And I like wut u said...

**ohh Keshi..you don't run too much.....u just stand where you are...true love will def run towards you

ty so much HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------


Ammu mwahhhhh hows u today?


**attraction can be highly additive.

thats so true and we have to be very careful not to confuse that with love. tnxxx hun!

-----------------------------------

Kalpana Im with u on this...I feel the same. U cant be engaged and flirting ard with other gals. Thats not nice.


**. 1 thing is that this guy is honest and said he is engaged.

yes thats true. And I appreciate him saying that w.o. just leading me on.

ty dear!

-----------------------------------

Thumbelina ty!

**Sometimes, love is just so "weird".. Nobody can explain why...

thats so true. But I guess I know clearly when Im in love. And this seems like just attraction.

-----------------------------------


Samy heyyyy!

**u always make such a statement just when things r heating up

lol cmon I meant that. seriously!


**intimacy (friendship), passion (lust), commitment (relationship). the 1st two add up to whats romance.

Samy how come ur soooo knowledgable in LOVE? WOW!


**so how dyu define what u feel for this dude?

I say it's just attraction. I dun think Im in love and na I cant love a guy who's already engaged and just declared love for someone else. I find that ridiculous and if he was my man, I'd have called off everything for good. U know me Samy.

yeah Im a family girl alrite :)

ty for ur great advice. I really appreciate all that u said here. HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Saby heyy again!

**the pic here looks very much like u
only she is a shade lighter

hehe really?


Saby tnxxx I aint feeling sad...Im glad I didnt get into anything and that Im just friends with him. ty n HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------


Kumar yeah isnt Saby the wisest man ever!

:)



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Brute heyyy!

**true picture of infactuation

aha :)

-----------------------------------

heyy Niki hows it goin?

**i think this kinda love is Great!!

mebbe for some women...but its really not for me cos Im too sensitive and sappy for this kinda games. Seriously :)

-----------------------------------

Light_House ty!

**awesome like a beautiful island, but when U reach there u realize that there is not even a single toilet bowl

hehe well-said!

Im not going any deeper than this. Im just a friend to him. No way that i'd break up someone else's r'ship.

ty so much Tarun!

-----------------------------------

G'day Rena! All the way from Mexico ha? cool! :)

** my sincere opinion is that he is just playing with you so don't take it seriously,

ty so much for being so honest abt ur opinion. I feel the same. I'll stay away from any trouble, duncha worry. tnxxx again!

-----------------------------------

HE wow what a GREAT analysis there! This is why I love u man. Ur soooo smart, sensible and very knowledgable in any topic. How do u do that? Im here reading ur comment and Im totally jaw-dropped :)


**he is about to restrict his DNA disbursement plan and free will into the hands of one woman and it sounds liked he may have panicked.

sounds very much like it.


All ur points r very valid.

**he may have just wanted one last fling before he hitched his horse

and that caught my eye the most. Soon I will tell u why. U wont be surprised.


**Don't you think that somebody ought to tell Mrs Cold Feet that her fiancee is in love with you?

I dunno who she is :( I wish I could tell her. But that would wreck his r'ship with her and I dun think I should be the one to do it. Cos I'd feel terrible doing that. :*(


Keshi.

saby said...

keshi

u must understand how an indian male tinks

my niece was friendly (in love) with a guy for a long while
they went out together but parents didnt accept her

whether they did it or not is not important

but the indian world tinks she is not marriage matl

so she went to USA for higher studies

and there she found her man and married hime at age 31

another friend was skinny (thin)
indian men want beeg boobs

she found her man in UK
for these guys thin is beautiful

Outdoorsy Girl said...

Girl, I totally know what you are talking about here! I am tired of being told "I'm taken" after being shaken, too. I have had an experience like this but usually there is some other unavailability issue going on with the guys I meet. :(

I do believe that you can meet someone this way and immediately have a connection with them. But to me, it sounds like HE was the one shaken and you're the one who's cool! ;)

And I'm glad that you are the "love interest" and NOT the one marrying this poor sap. LOL!

Keep us posted with this one, Keshi!

Anonymous said...

Put a BORED guy and a pretty friendly gal...

I, Me & The One said...

if hes good looking, may be you should say yes! you will be saving a poor girl! wont you? you can dump him at leisure cos you know hes not worth keeping life long!

hehe! i am sure no one gave you this idea! i dunno there r so many comments!!

shamiQ

saby said...

the prob with u keshi
u tink u have all the answers

u r pig headed
even at 56 i no dat i dont no

i keep an open mind
i was tot dat lesbians and homosexuals are evil

but my best friends today are les
i even gave up my religion for dem to show my solidarity

i rejected Pope Benedict bcoz he attacked lesbians

never be afraid to back track
consistency in opinion is a foolish mind

again Gandhi-ji said dis
he was trapped by a reporter who confronted him for saying the opposite of wat he said just a week ago

Gandhi-ji said i admit.
i back tracked bcoz i now feel differently about the issue

saby said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Keshi said...

Shiv heyy Im good ta and urself?

:)

-----------------------------------

TT now Im confused again :(


**People are not committed to themselves that's why they need committment

thats so right!


but I think true love will make u committ to one person somehow...isnt that so?

No I wont go for it...I cant cos Im not that kinda girl. I dun wanna be a marriage-breaker and if he truly loves me, then come clean man...go break off the engagement himself and THEN come to me :)


-----------------------------------

Cuckoo heyy I'll read it soon TY so much!

yep alot of interesting thoughts here ha :)

-----------------------------------

Visithra ur right.

**shows how insecure he is n he can always leave u again for another

so true. I too think it's insecurity.

ty so much girl!

-----------------------------------

Ish hugggggggggggggz babez!

yeah...he seems to be having alot of issues with his GF. He told me this yday. hmmmm...

And I just love what u said! Only I can find out what this is all abt. So true! But Ish I can never fall in love with a man who just betrayed his woman. If I was in that girl's shoes, just imagine how I'd feel! So yeah..this is a big NO for me. Even if Im in love with this guy, I'd walk away.

ty so much Ish have a beautiful day sweetie!

-----------------------------------


KAP heyyy hows u?

**Not much of experience, but i would say that if the guy loved you in one talk, yes he might love you trely. It doesnot take long to know a person. You dont have to know each other since years...

thats a very different and beautiful point of view. No one else said that here but u. Yeah it's got to be KAP to come up with unique views :) And I agree with u too. Sometimes LOVE happens in a jiffy. Just like that and it doesnt have to take months/years.


yeah Im talking to him as a friend and nothing else. ur right...he should not be cheating his woman. If he really loves me, then he can be a man and come clean. Even then Im not sure if I'd see him that way :)

lol I'll send u an email soon hahaha! HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

heyyy KK hows u? :)

**I think its pre-marriage jitters for him

All u guys seem to know this very well ha LOL!


Why dun I find love? I guess ur asking that Qn from the wrong person ha :) Keshi n KK in the same boat hehehe.

-----------------------------------

Desperado heyy!

**...but maybe u can help him realize tht his fiancé is d right choice

yeah and thats what Im doing right now :)

ty and drop by for coffee ok! ;-)

-----------------------------------

Cinderella wow what a story there!


**Two dys later the guy tells me that he is love with me...imagine !!!???

OMG thats pathetic! He must be some no-life loser. Im glad u didnt have any more probs with him and that u handled it well. Even if that meant breaking up with ur friend.

Yeah life can be dangerous sometimes. Small sparks can lead to fatal fires.

ty so much!

-----------------------------------

Virus heyy!

Na I aint gonna give it a shot. Cos I dun wanna be the woman to break someone else's home. It's really not me.


And mebbe u should start testing ur luck with women? :)

-----------------------------------

Adi heyy!

LOL cmon I didnt lead him on :):)

-----------------------------------

Sanjay yeah I feel for the girl...I dunno her so I cant really help her.

tnxxx mate!

-----------------------------------

Cari heyy tnxx!

OMG he really did that to ya? See how scary small talk can be. Some men think friendly women r easy. Poor guys lol! Im glad u walked out of it w.o. any danger.

ofcourse ur allowed to get attracted to others and hell I do everyday LOL!


** think it's how far u take that attraction though...bc...sometimes u take that attraction and it starts to become a fantasy or...the person simply wants to make into a reality...

Spot on! we must know the limits. Thats it.

ty so much Cari and I know u care abt me alot. And I value ur thoughts so feel free to write as much as u like here. HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Saby heyy again!

**The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.


haha good one!

-----------------------------------

Shonget yeah ur spot on! I think he has issues with his GF.

-----------------------------------

Purnima HUGGGGGGGGGZ! I missed ya. Where have u been?

**Once a cheater always a cheater

The only truth there ever was. :)

Yeah I know what u mean. Wandering minds aint strong foundation for a committed r'ship.

I've been alrite tnxx! I hope ur keeping well too sweetie. HUGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Ann ur spot on!

**He needs to re-evaluate the relationship he has

I said the same to him yday. I hope he does that.

Yeah alot of broken marriages have wandering minds behind em. How sad.

I understand it tho. it's the inability to stay faithful. And it happens cos of a weak and fragile mind. Not all ppl can truly and fully love someone.

ty hun HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Johno thats so true. U can MAKE ur mind believe ur in love even when its really not love.

-----------------------------------

Jo ur right. I think he's looking just for that!

**Did he have this going on for you for a long time?

NOOOOOOOO! I only got to know him on a personal level just last Friday!!

-----------------------------------

Rose heyy!

**even if he truly loves you, is he strong enough to break an engagement with another girl?

Na I dun think he will do that. Now I think he's a player.

-----------------------------------

Jac na now I feel he's just playing. Soon I'll tell u why.

black...I love it!

-----------------------------------

Shitrint ty!

yeah it seems like a perfect illusion...thats all.

I feel for his fiance. I truly do.

-----------------------------------

heyyya Neko!

**some men will say and do anything... for a little somethin'

so true! What some men will do for a score LOL!

-----------------------------------

Meggzy heyy HUGGGGGGGGZ!

Lust it seems like...so true!

I will keep u all posted abt this...it's really interesting and it's good to be aware of this kinda thing.

ty so much!

-----------------------------------

heyy Raghav!

**when i started reading i thought it was a pleasant post

aww Im sorry but most true stories arent pleasant all the time. So u stopped reading? :(

-----------------------------------


hello JaanKi!

**..Iam in a relationship rt now but also deeply in love with my Jaan

u mean ur in a love triangle rightn now? awwwwww...

if u love one guy and ur also in love with another, it's better off u break up with one. Im just telling this so u can have a clear mind and save alot of heartbreak for everyone. What d u think sweetie?


Keshi.

saby said...

SHIT
i feel like i been stripped nude

NEVER EVER AGAIN will i confess to Keshi

Keshi said...

AB do we see MEGAN written all over ur face or wut. LOL!

**Are the feelings still there?

no lol!


-----------------------------------


Saby ur not only a devil's advocate but also a big fat chatter box LOL!


**TANK GOD u r not a marriage counsellor

haha yeah!

Ur taken Saby cos u have a wife?? DUHHHHHHHHHHH!

U come here for morning Dharshan? lol sweet.

-----------------------------------

JaanKi ty! :) I will chat to u soon.


-----------------------------------

Ghee heyy HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

yeah it happens ha... :) it's ok as long as u know the limits.

I will visit u soon sweetie, TY!

-----------------------------------

Margie I can NEVA be upset with an angel...can I?

lol no he deserves that hahahaha!

ty sweetie HUGGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

heyy Outdoorsy mwahhhhhhhh!

yeah it's always like that ha...where r all the 'AVAILABLE' men??? :)


**it sounds like HE was the one shaken and you're the one who's cool!

haha true! ty sweetie :):) And Im glad that I was the 'love-interest' too! ;-)

yeah I will keep u all posted abt it...ty sweetie HUGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

LaVida yeah LOL and we create a fire!


-----------------------------------

I_Me_&TheOne heyy WC!


** you can dump him at leisure cos you know hes not worth keeping life long!

Quite tempting an idea but I really cant do that..it's so not me :(

ty sweetie!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

LOL Saby why? hahaha!

OMG did I publish something u didnt wanna? ok let me see...

Keshi.

Keshi said...

btw Saby didnt u want free speech?

Keshi.

Keshi said...

o u deleted it, tnxx lol!

Keshi.

Cazzie!!! said...

Forget the guy, all he is is trouble. He needs to go be commited to the girl he has promised marriage.
There us someone there for you, it is not him. You are easy to love, we all love you and I have never met you :)

Anonymous said...

hi mayt!
hind sight is 20-20 they say.. :)
And how do we ever know if are in fact having hind sight?? LOL :)

I think you are just over valuing these things... I know love or physics or whatever we do is all wonderful and great... but once in a while its good to just step back and see what we are doing with them... I often find that we are over valuing things... that does not mean they lose value, we are just falsely increasing its value.. they are what they are despite what we think :)

I can give this gyan to anyone, but i doubt if i follow it myself :)
so i have to leave it there Kesh :)

Cheers!

Anonymous said...

Keshi: If he has feelings for you, then he will come to you only and not to the girl who he got engaged.

Jewel Rays said...

hi Kesh..i,

I can never be a girl who broke someone else's enegagement. I can never let that happend and I wont.

That has always been my strong standing ground as well. :) But somehow when thrown into the situation its really weird. And sometimes you really lose the focus. but at the end of the day knowing what is right helps alot and the conviction of the heart pays us off if taken into account. :) And i believe that reigns strongly in both of us.:D

Keshi..I was reading ya comment back to south and thought i would like to say something. :)

I'll slowly find out what's bothering him. The last he told me was that he fights alot with his GF and then I asked if he really loves her..and he said yes but she drives me crazy sometimes. So yeah..I won't get into anything more with him...I'll be a friend and help him through. He needs to learn to love that woman no matter what and get married to her. I'll make sure that happens :) And ur right...then he might realise that he wasnt really in love with me hehe.

Keshi, i have been there and have thought exactly the same as ya. and the guy tells me the same thing about he always fighting with his gf and blah blah blah. and i was like a comfort to him. especially since he finds it a breeze to talk to me. So there was i trying to be a friend and help him. i believe it was the good nature of me to want to stand by people. *rolls* but at the end of the day my own good nature could sometimes get me entangled by surprise. i never thought i would see him another way. didn't until i start thinking much. AT the end of the day, i realise i can only do so much, but its up to the guy to make it work with his lady alright. blah blah. its really complicated stuff. i was juz some outlet when the real outlet he should be looking into is his own heart and his girlfriend's eyes. just thought i would share this stuff. Its not necessary that urs will turn out the same as mine. :) It just that sometimes things can seem so harmless and safe but in fact put our hearts at stake on the line. Juz sharing keshi..:)

*hugs Sweetheart*

Keshi said...

Caz heyy ty! I think ur spot on abt him...he's trouble.


**You are easy to love, we all love you and I have never met you

awww LOVE U TOO babe HUGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Soj ur right...we do over-value things sometimes...u really got me thinking there. TY!


-----------------------------------

Priya thats so true! ty.



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Amy heyy hugggggggggz!

yes ur right...knowing the right thing to do is very imp. Cos as u say, sometimes our hearts can confuse us and lead us to the wrong. So we have to be very careful and always do the right thing in a situation like this.

And what u said abt his telling u abt his fights...well I was thinking that way too...that he was just saying all that just to get my sympathy perhaps? Just to get my attention? Who knows na.

Anyways ty so much for ur thoughts and also for putting across ur experiences here bravely. U r truly a great gal and whoever who's going to be ur man is definitely a VERY LUCKY dude. :)

Have a wonderful day AMY MWAHHHHHHH!


Keshi.

SamY said...

**lol cmon I meant that. seriously!

i'll belive that if u want me to :p

**Samy how come ur soooo knowledgable in LOVE? WOW!

I just vomited what I read somewhere :D

**ty for ur great advice

that was not meant as an advice ... what an insult ... anywayz :) ... hav a gud day nutty

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmmm...Very interesting situation.
Sounds like love is in the air all u you have to do is catch it but I don't want you to get hurt inthe end. I would call this infatuation cuz if he is in love with u then why did he hide the engagement thingy? If he truely loves you then no matter what he will come to u trust me :)

Btw I love the pic you posted ;)

Stay Beautiful...!!

Anonymous said...

voww..thats a beautiful experience..but yes..i am sad that he is engaged :P

Keshi said...

haha Samy ty!


-----------------------------------


ty Suga...and all ur suspicion was accurate...he told me what he wanted. Read my latest post.

Huggggggggggz! Dun worry Im ok. I wasnt in love with him to be hurt :)

-----------------------------------

White_forest Im not sad at all LOL! read my latest post.



Keshi.

Seema said...

A real touf one on you dearie…

But keshi if he's realized n love is true..am sure he needs to have the courage to gauge whether its serious n get you to agree since it concerns you too…a decision needs to be made at the right time before love slips out of hands…needs the confidence n guts to call off the past and move confidently to the present n the new decision…otherwise just go with his past decisions n yeah forget this one..he needs to stand by whatever decision he makes..no double crossing…not even in thoughts cauz that's not fair !

Besides it concerns you so it’s a joint decision !

Take care !

Keshi said...

Seema tnxx hun! Ur sooo right. No double-crossing.

but looks like thats what he wanted :) Read my latest post sweetie. o these men!

Keshi.

Parag said...

I am married.. and let me confess that at times one does feel attracted to certain people..
But love is more that just attraction..
How can one just forget one's fiancee / spouse..
People with whom you may have shared so many moments of joy / happiness / kid's illness / joy of achievements and ofcourse physical intimacy..
Moral of the story is that one needs to control the moments of weakness.. that's what differentiates humans from polygamous animals !!

Anonymous said...

Well...thats a biiig problem...but i suggest too plz not get into one..coz this happened to me once...when i dated a married man..coz i never knew he was married and later believe me her wife just made me go mad on things...this is just an attraction and its u who'll have to be away from that guy....believe me this is a serious advice...dont mess up with him...ull end up messing ur own life....and love cannot be developed in a day..it needs time...and take ur own time even if u have feelings for him!!!

Anonymous said...

always wanted to have two husbands :D

Anonymous said...

Hi Keshi.
I really understand you.
I think that THE TIME is a good advisor and good medicine and good doctor.
For Love -- is never too late.
I'm sure you'll get lovely , great person.
Best to you!

mommyof2 said...

Stay away from this guy & wait for the right one:-)

Keshi said...

Parag thats so true.

**Moral of the story is that one needs to control the moments of weakness

Spot on and thats what I mean. Even I have had crushes for more than one man...but we dun ACT on em. We just have to know where to draw the line.

ty for ur honesty!

-----------------------------------

Saira u dated a married man? OMG that must have tough!! Im so glad u came out of it unscathed. HUGGGGGGGGGGGGZ n ty!


-----------------------------------

Anonimply heyy!

**always wanted to have two husbands

it's ur choice and ulitmately ur responsible for how u feel..always rem that :)

-----------------------------------

Krystyna heyy tnxxx so much! Ur a swt hrt.

Huggggggggggz!

-----------------------------------

I sure will Mommy ty!


Keshi.

Orikinla Osinachi. said...

Sweet Keshi,
Many marriages are marriages of convenience and not of love.

If humans married for true love, the world would have been a better and safer place today.

The guy must be really in love with you. And thank God he is honest enough to confess the truth.

Cheers and God bless.

Dawn....सेहर said...

Hey I read the whole story and I am wondering if its your sexy pic that made him think about :D
Dont know but I never experienced this way!
But I guess when you guys started communicating that might have ignited the feeling!
I think you did the right thing and like a matured person I must say :D
Good Luck gal ....things will happen but one shouldnt get disappointed! Imagine if you were in love head over heals with him and then u come to know about this fiancee...it would have been worse to get out of your system...!
So what ever happens ...it happens for good ;)
HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGS to my dear sis

Keshi said...

Ori yeah alot of marriages r for convenience.

no he didnt love me at all...actually he must hate me cos in the end all he ever suggested was a fling.

-----------------------------------

Dawn tnxxx HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


** Imagine if you were in love head over heals with him and then u come to know about this fiancee

thats so true. He's a loser. Big time.


Keshi.

Anonymous said...

Yeah i did that...coz i never knew he was married...and even im thankful to god that i came out of it...but sometimes u knw i feel guilty of myself for doing that...coz this left a strain of their relation...but neways i never did anything wrong...so its ok..and hugs to u too :)

Anonymous said...

rem that! yes every night :)

Anonymous said...

Heh heh Keshi iam not in a love triangle...iam having a broken marriage and in love with my Jaan...Anyways its too long story to say on a blog

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

lol i fall in love everyday ;p ;p

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

listen to this .... i met a girl from the net (chipkali_01 from IT if u've seen her arnd) ... she came with a friend of hers ... this guy n me ... coincidently have common friends in Delhi and UAE ... and therez a probability that our dad's know each other coz both work for Indian govt. ... and well .. theres more ... this guy is already in love with me!!
I mean we've just met once ... and it was in the first meetin he said he loved me! ;p

i dunno if its love at first sight or lust .. ;p

ur case is kinda diff ... i think this guy wants a fling or somethin just before he gets married ... and am sure ure not going for it .. r ya?

Keshi said...

Saira Im glad u didnt do anything wrong. Sometimes in life we make mistakes but to come out of it unscathed is a blessing. HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

Anonimply okkk!


-----------------------------------

JaanKi heyy!

**...iam having a broken marriage and in love with my Jaan

I hope u got a separation/divorce...always stay outta mess.

Huggggggggz n TC!

-----------------------------------

Cheesy haha me too! Always falling...in love I mean LOL!

No I dunno that girl...anyways...so that guy is love with u just like that? I dunno...mebbe he really is...then again, mebbe he's just in LUST? U cant tell...it's really confusing. Best bet wud be initial attraction. Its always the case. Boy meeting girl..it's only physical...:)


**i dunno if its love at first sight or lust

Give him time...dun say anything yet...time is the best revealer.


TC sweetie HUGGGGGGGGGZ! And oh..I miss ya alot...u have no idea.



Keshi.

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

awww so do I ... I still owe you a mail reply

Hugzzz

Keshi said...

aww me too Cheesy..Im yet to write to u and few other friends...

HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

Keshi.

Sush said...

The title is apt.. perfect illusion.. yup, it is just an illusion.. Guys..duhh.. I dont actually have anything against them but i have been at the recieving end in this kind of a triangle and I felt like hell for a couple of days but then it was like.. what the hell, it is better that it ended and got to know this guy's true colors before ruining my life..

I guess this can happen to anyone, I mean finding another person attractive when we are actually committed to another person, but it is the way we deal with relationships that make all the difference.

Keshi said...

Sush heyy!

**what the hell, it is better that it ended and got to know this guy's true colors before ruining my life..

really? U too? awww..Im glad u walked out of it unscathed.

Yes it's def how we handle it all. men r trouble arent they LOL!

ty n hugggggggggggz!


Keshi.