Thursday, October 4

He Aint 'Savvy' He's My Brother...

Scenario: You have a brother/sister...you never really connected with him/her since childhood, not cos you didn't want to but it's just the way it is. You know, some siblings don't get along all that well, no matter how hard they try. So imagine you're in that situation. But also imagine you as the one who's trying hard to connect but fail each time, due to the negative response from the other side. Personalities seem to clash and nothing seem to work. Even as an adult you keep fighting with your heart not to accept this rather unfortunate fate, and you try more and more to build a relationship somehow. But deep inside your soul, you know it's not gonna work...you know that you'll never be loved, appreciated, valued and seen the way you want your brother/sister to see you. He/she never understands your true feelings...it's like you constantly keep falling back into a dark pit everytime you try to get out of it. It's a very sad situation that nature has created? Or do you think it's a conscious choice that the other person makes? Or is it some sort of complex that you'll never be able to comprehend cos you're not the one who's being difficult? Or is it a doomed fate that you'll never be able to escape? Do you feel that you're the only one who's painting love that gets washed away each time, and that you're all alone in this mess?

I'm not sure if I have all the answers, but one thing I'm sure of is that people are who they are no matter what. It's very hard to change somebody's personality, even if you try for years. It's not that they don't want to try...it's just who they are. Am I wrong? How would you cope in a situation like that? Would you fall apart or would you live with it? Being the person that I am, I would stand by my family no matter what...but that's cos that's who I am - I don't expect much in return. So are some siblings who are like great friends, purely a blessing of nature or a work of luck, or hardwork? My opinion is, as I said before, blood is not always thicker than water...in any situation, your personality plays a big part. You could be in the same family but have very different personalities. And some just don't get along, even if they are born into the same family. Love is something that's developed naturally...it cannot be forced to be felt just cos you're in the same family. I find such examples in every family I come across and it's very true when they say 'you can choose your friends but not your family'. I have witnessed where a brother was in deep trouble (for no fault of his) and his sister didn't even bother to look at him, when she could very well afford to. I also know of a sister who never received the love she tried for years to get from her own sister. And there are more and more stories. Some people wait for years to be 'accepted' by their siblings (even if they're not worth waiting for) and some may even die without never really knowing what it is to be loved by them. So would these siblings even realise it after they lose their loved-one? I'm not sure about that. It's no point realising it after someone's gone anyways. I just think it's a heart-breaking situation...to have a brother/sister and not to have that emotional bonding, to have nobody standing by you when you needed them the most. What say guys? Share your experiences on siblings, either of your own or of other families that you have observed. And would you stand by your brother/sister no matter what? Would love to know your thoughts...


Current Music: Stand By Me by Ben E. King

188 Cranium Signets:

Southpaw unplugged said...

Hmmmmm...i can feel what u r saying coz i hv seen such things with a lot of ppl who r close to me. As far as i m concerned i hv 2 sisters but hv never gone thru something like this coz most of my childhood was spent in the grind to survive so never really even had the opportunity to interact with them closely and as of now they hv always seen me as their father figure so sibling rivalry was absolutely out of equation even though one of'em is only a year younger than me.

AnonymousBlogger said...

Siblings are funny. You spend all your childhood with them, forced to put up with them.

Those years spent together will determine the future relationship you have with them.

I know some siblings that are close, and some that are not. Ultimately, they'll always be family, and that must count for something.

I think it might be asking too much to expect all of us to get along with all our siblings, like we're friends.

We're not friends. We're family.

KAYLEE said...

GOD Can you stump me any more?

phoenix said...

so true i have an elder sister..we cannot connect at all..she is jealous and angry at me.,for she believes that i am more priviledged than her,when my parents think otherwise..she goes out of her way trying to create trouble for me...she would pretend that she is close to me,get the secrets out and then make a huge row about how i get more and she doesn't get any.Note-she is married and has a kid..yes and it never stops....she is one bitch of a sister to have..i have stopped even trying to connect..most of the time i just ignore her...this maybe sad..but then somethings in life are never meant to be

Jim said...

i beg to differ
BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER definitely

my brother Albert and i are poles apart... age gap he is 6 years older ... we dont laff at the same jokes ... we seldom meeet though we live only 500 metres apart

but when i am in trouble
he is the first to appear at my door

and bhabhi ... she is an angel

Iceman said...

Well... This ain't new at all... Sibling rivalry is there from ages...

I have a wonderful relationship with my sis... But we had to work for that! We have had a lot of fights & have not talked to each other for months at times...

She was the more pampered one, and I always thought as a kid that my parents loved he more than me!

But all that changed as we became adults... as we grew up! We accepted each other for what we are! And she has stood by me in the toughest of my times supporting me! I am indeed blessed to have her as my sister! I thank god every day for that!

Nothing is permanent keshi... times change... it doesn't take much time at all for a sour sibling relationship 2 turn around!

In the end... its your duty to love ur family and stand by them.. no matter what... and remember this... sometimes... people need all the love from you, when they deserve it not! It might just change the world for them! Love is indeed such a powerful thing... The absence or presence of it will make all the difference in our lives!

KAYLEE said...

BUT I HAVE ONE LIKE THAT WELL HE IS A STEP BROTHER HAHA!

Sweetstickychewy said...

As usual once again a great post. : )

My bro and me were close to wrestling opponents when we were young. We had our moments of closeness when we are both up to some kiddy games and little joyfulness. As we came into our teenage years we were both in our own world. Communication was not as strong. We kinda lost our spice. I am happy to say that as we grew out of our teen years and bloom into young adulthood we got closer than ever. The best thing I am having as a sister right now is he trusting me to be the first to know abt things that involves his life before my mum or any one. Or things that my mum should not know about for now. And somehow I am encouraged in how he can see that person he can rely on when it comes to that. That’s encouraging.:)

That’s for now. If anything were to happen to him. My heart will break big time. I love that Guy!!

I struggle with my little sista though. We are like 13 years apart. :O yeah..lol..:P

And yeah being the big sista. Sometimes its just hard getting things through to her. I have to say we tend to forget out time of early puberty and the way our minds work when we reach our now. But than again, am trying to look at things her way. Am looking forward to be best friends with her just so I will encourage her in the directions towards her life/outlook. It’s a struggle sometimes honestly. I am concern big time as she reach puberty and so on. And honestly, sometimes its so hard to put the pride down. That’s something I am praying to break when it comes to my relationship with that sweetheart.

Cheeries!

Jim said...

in INDIA family comes first

it is not enuff that u love her and she loves u

she hust be accepted by all in the family

very often it is a joint family
which means about a dozen guys have to approve

it is tuff on the new bhabhi

Jay said...

I only have one sibling, a sister. Well I have two step-sisters but they don't count.

My sister and I are close so there's no problem like what you described there. But, do think that blood is thicker than water. Even if siblings don't connect the way one of them would like they're still family.

ghee said...

very deep post of yours again,Keshi...

yeah,its a sad fact that some siblings dont get along well coz of their personalities.

my sis and me werent that so close when we were teenagers coz of our diff point of views,but as we`ve grown older and live separately,distance and absences make us love each other so much.now were not only sisters but good friends.

btw,thank you for the warning Keshi,I had no idea that it would be a danger to show DT...i should delete the pic after a while then :)

hugging you,
ghee

:P fuzzbox said...

Eventhough they are a pain in the ass I stand by my brothers through thick and thin. That's what family is about.

Cazzie!!! said...

Nope...the friends I have are the brothers and sisters I have made for myself. They are the ones I can trust through thick and thin.

Priyanka Sarkar said...

i dont know how u manage to surprise me each time tht i drop by ur blog!!
very very well written...i mean it...
id love to know how it is to hv a sibling too.....i wish sometimes i had one all the time around!!!

twilight said...

"Can't live with them, can't live without them!"

but in the end, they're family and I love them more than I make obvious I guess. Sometimes it's all simply understood without words right :)

A thought provoking post. One that might see candid confessions. For me it simply is about understanding another facet to such relationships. I cannot identify with "hatred" among siblings but it's a fact of life too.

Dalicia said...

my brother doesn't get involved with anyone matters. so he's really cool....unlike the bitching sister that i am...talk, gossip...talk. and getting myself in all this trouble with people.

from him, i learn to keep my silence at a proper time.

of course we fought a lot. but you know...which siblings doesn't? i'm glad that my parents had my brother. DOUBLE THE TROUBLE..ahahah

uttara said...

keshi
this hasnt done good to my current state of mind :(

anyway ... i did mail u i will revert to this later wen i feel peaceful!

annie said...

Hav a read thru the latest post i put up just now. U'd njoi. I'll be back for this one of urs.

Nora said...

Fortunately, I'm very close with my brother. :)

Nora

Aditi said...

agreed it takes a fine line and is difficult sometimes to find the balance between siblings.. my sister and i have tons of ups and downs but invariably we try to remember what the other means to us and hopefully that is enough
but there are so many siblings specially once u get older in life that just dont talk and i hope everyday that i dont end up like them

Kirthi said...

dear keshi... getting the bonding of a sibling sure is a blessing!! be it india or anywhere across the world.. there are so many things that make up this relationship- i think its the most fragile for there is comparison, arguments, tears and laughter as well..

i have a younger sister.. we bond well..we have our differences as well... there are times we give each other the space which is important and times when we fight for each other!

n i agree there are sibling that don't bond at all... but sometimes parents play a major role in this! you can always mold a child but over a period when the feeling gets deeper then it is difficult for the child to grow out of it!!

very beautiful thoughts!! :)

Mona said...

Hi keshi,
Thats true..manytimes we fail to convey our feelings, our emotions to own siblings..
But, what i have felt from my own experience, if you want to get close with one, do stay time alone with them that brings closeness, no matter how hard you resist...Me and my own sis were never close to each other, instead we use to fight always, cant see each other, but then my parents sent her to live me for a month for some course and then i saw a change, now we too are close and mostly share our secrets..

But, sometimes as you said, its in the personality that they cant go with anyone, or their is no reason that you start dsliking that person...

hmm,very very complex situation.. dont conclude it bcoz the more the brains, the more different reactions..

Take care

Prats said...

Dat was a really beautiful post. Never voiced out but always thought of....
A Sibling relation can be very fragile. While they are young, they are always at loggerheads, most times you feel like strangling the life out of them, but when you live far away from each other, you'll need each other for no reason at all...Its tough deciding if its good or bad...but having one sure stands apart
After all the years of sibling squabbles, I land up with 2 boys who are still to get over this phenomenon called sibling rivalry. Will have to wait and watch to see how situations take them from now on.

Me in my world.... said...

I and my sister never clicked. She is my moms pet. I used to be always compared with her for the N number of talent she possessed. Guess our wavelength never matched.

But fortunately with time we are much closer than we were.

anits said...

hi keshi dear...i think we siblings should b like friends..n i think if the age gap is not so far, it wont be a big problem in communicating to each other and they will have more understanding! anyway everyone should appreciate to have siblings.
tcare gal! hugzzzz

Die Muräne said...

I would stand by my sister for sure! Always.

But we also had our up and downs. after all in astrology I could see it pretty good. Sometime you just don't fit together for a few years or so. doesn't matter. times come, times go.

niki yokota said...

im sorryyyy keshi-chan!!
boss is doing ramadan and he wouldnt go out of office.
so i cant make reply comment these days(^o^);;

Andrew The Asshole said...

Do you thing that one's "personality" is more influence by the elements of one's evironment?

Even growing up in the same house, I'm much different from my siblings.

Steph said...

I can so relate to this post. My sister and i are so very close, we talk every day, and i'd hide a body for her and vice versa.
My brother on the other hand is totally different. We don't connect at all.
He sees me as the family joke and refuses to take anything I say or do seriously.
It's like he can barely tolerate me.

This hurts for only one reason. I adore my nephews (his sons) and I don't see them as often as i'd like to because of him, because I can't be arsed dealing with his shit, and i don't want to get in arguments with him around the kids.

I've accepted that we're never going to have a good relationship, but it's still sad and it still hurts.

Princess said...

hi kesh,

blood is thicker than water is definitely true..

you will not realize it unless u stay away from each other. you'll start missing them so much that u feel like crying. u tend to call them often to make urself comfortable...

Take care,
-Aiz.

Bla said...

My sister is my precious.

KMF said...

again u..

akanksha said...

I hope alls well at ur end.I am back after a great vacation and it sure feels good to be back home although i had an amazing time.:-)

I have lots n lots to share in regard to this post.U have been able to put forward the relaity of life in such an amazing way...Lots of people live with these facts in mind and things do change sometimes.

I have a younger brother and we dont really get along too well.But somewhere down the line, we know that we both love each other lots. Showing our love to each other is something that does not happen every now and then.But it surfaces in times of happiness, success, sorrow or exactly when we need each other.And sibling love is something that grows manyfolds in magnitude when physical distance comes in picture and u know that u wont be able to fight on silly isses everyday.I miss those fights with him when i am not at home...and thats wt makes r bond stronger."not getting along well makes us fight with each other...and as they say..ladne se pyaar badhta hai"

Andrew said...

I wouldn't try too hard Keshi, but keep your options open. Things sometimes work better when you are older.

If you want a personal experience, my sister is forty and I am a few years older. We are now connecting better than we ever have.

Top cat said...

I've always found it interesting that people think because people are born into the same family they have to like one another, some people just don't get along.
There is always a certain bonding because of shared experience but this is different than love.
This becomes even more evident when the siblings become adults, especially when one is older, the older always feels the younger is foolish and needs their advice on what to do, this can indeed cause friction.
Then there are issues of jealousy where the one sibling feels the other was treated more fairly by the mother and father.
Usually the more children in the family the younger the child the easier the parents become because they've evolved in their parenting skills, this can cause quite a bit of jealousy.
My thoughts anyway.:)
tc

alex said...

Keshi,

Love i believe is a choice, which is based on our personalities.

Blood relations don't have 'love' implicit in them, but it has to be developed.

Had been away for a week. Went to meet friends. Between the current song is lovely.

Asha said...

Even though we come from the same mother, we still are different individuals, aren't we?
I have a brother who is completely opposite of me, very self centered and uses ppl to his advantage, contacts me ONLY when needs something but not otherwise!!
What do I do? Help if I can but not to the point of making him dependent on me or vice versa.If he doesn't like it, so be it!! Oh well!!
Do I support him when he is doing something wrong, NO WAY!! I wouldn't support my own kids and hubby if they are doing something which hurt others!!
Let him/her be Keshi.If they want, they will come to you. You live your life with a smile on your face always!:))

curryegg said...

Nice post about sibilings..
It makes me wanna have one too..
:)

Tys on Ice said...

iam one of 3 brothers...we are very close..but i also know that we are the fortunate ones...i wud stand by them no matter what...they wud do the same for me too...we have been thru thick and thin together...evnthough we hve families of our own, we r still a team....

Brian in Oxford said...

I'm not particularly close with my brother, and not just because he lives a thousand miles away. I mean, when we do catch up we get along fine and try to out-prank each other...but that's about it. When I was down for his wedding last year, I snapped a photo of him poopin' on the toilet at the golf course we played at early in the day. Stuff like that.

Grundir the Implacable said...

It took me several hundred years to bond with my brethren Nazgul.

niki yokota said...

im not close to any siblings except mom.
family is such a trouble..
their spouses will stand by them.
not meee...

LADY LUXIE said...

ah'..well...am not so good with sibling thing...so far as I've experienced we don't I dunno' "care" seems to be too harsh a word...maybe..we just don't have anything worth looking back to to bother to even think about meeting up...

When we do however..it feels more of like meeting a long lost neighbor once again..I'm not proud of this..nor happy about it..but our upbringing has caused this to be so...No fights..no anything..we smile and talk when we do meet..but that's it...

Pri said...

***Love is something that's developed naturally...it cannot be forced to be felt just cos you're in the same family***
very true! :)
im fortunate that i can relate extremely well to my sis and we make the best of pals ...cant keep any secret from her (even if i want to) sigh!!
yaa do feel she's a evil but she's one of those necessary evils :p...heehee
but yaa do see a number of "blood is not always thicker than water" scenario...in fact my best friend and her brother are juss like chalk and cheese...she is cheese ofcourse :D.lol!!

EBEZP said...

Nice post btw Keshi
Up til just 7 years ago I was an only child.....
Then I found out I had a half sister who was older than me and immediately thought how lucky I was missing out on the being bossed around but able to spend endless hours now catching up on what was really two different upbringings.
She's my best friend now, not my elder sister but there is nothing I wouldn't do for her.

De.vile said...

Hey! So nice to see you on the blog after a while. Sorry, am so bad at keeping touch. Things go, Im comme ci comme ca. How are you? Needn't ask you what you been upto, the blog seems to say it all :)

WP2007 said...

Hi Keashi

This has a lot to ponder.

You're right when you say people are who they are. You can't change other people, but we should see what we can change about ourselves.

I've seen whole families at war with each other; however, if a family member is in trouble they all come to their aid.

I was wondering why you wrote painting on love? Paint is superficial and a coating. I do know what you mean--I'm just being picky. :)

LOL

Bev

Autumn Storm said...

Hmm, you've given me food for thought, it's not something I have ever tried to define. I would imagine that parents have a lot to do with how sibling relationships develop and that it is rare that siblings who were not friendly during childhood would be so as adults, too much history, on the other hand I'm sure that sometimes when they grow and start leading their own lives they get to know each other as adults and can become friends. In my own case, personality certainly is a factor as is age difference. I have(had) three siblings, one seven years older(deceased), one seven years younger and another 21 years younger. My elder brother did not live with us and so for the first almost 8 years of my life, I was the only child at home. Both my brothers have(had) very different personalities from my own, very similar to each other and though we share an unbreakable bond, the differences great enough to make blood the only real reason that we have a relationship.
It would be nice, for any of us with siblings, to have a mutually supportive and loving relationship, but families are generally messy and so hopefully, since this is what families should do, we love and we accept and we get through the ups and downs, the disappointments, the fights, etc, because in the end, blood is blood.

Old Knudsen said...

I have a sibling that is nothing like me and always has a sercastic put doon for me, why would I spend anytime with him? we get on better when we are miles apart.
Unrelated friends 'can' be better than blood relatives.

What about the father who abuses his children? that would seem to disprove the blood thicker than water expression.

You can pick yer friends but not yer family, that says it all.

starry nights said...

interesting post as usual keshi. I think I have always had a special bond with my sister. she is a lot older than me and kind of took over when my mother died. I always turned to her for advice and respect her as i would my mother.I have 5 brothers who are closer in age but we don't have that special bond. we love each other but there are things that i will tell my sister and not tell my brothers because they would not understand and will be quick to judge.

anuj said...

hey keshi ..
well I would say I have been lucky enough to not have come across such a thing ..rather have been through some nice exxmpls of grt brotherhood frm my parents n parental side ..

n have been taught by my parents to love my siblings .. n I do ..

bt yes .. it does hurt ..
bt thn thts how lofe goes ..

have gud day!!
cheers

** so when r u gonna hv drinks with me?

soon ..lets see :P
haha .. only in 2 drinks .. lol.. ur gonna b so drnk .. i hope u dnt do ne mischiefs while drunk ..hehe

RAFFI said...

family must always love and support each other... through thick and thin. we can never change anyone but ourselves, but we can accept others for who they are and love them despite their flaws.... that's what love really is.

The Phosgene Kid said...

Heck, in Missouri they even sleep together. Can't get much close than that!!

KP said...

me and my bro....we hang out at times...we chill out....we watch games...:)

Sugababee said...

Hey Kesh!

I have a very interesting relationship with my brother...
We are super close... he's always been my father figure and we can tell each other almost everything; however on the same note, we sometimes HATE eachother with a passion, a genuine hate... more so recently than ever.
I don't know... things aren't the same anymore.

Zhu said...

I have weird relationships with my brother and my sister, since I'm the eldest and we have almost 6 and 10 yrs difference. Besides, I left home to Canada about 6 yrs ago now, so I didn't really see my brother growing up... which is kinda sad when you think of it. Hopefully one day we will be closer.

Keshi said...

hey Southy tnxx!

**coz most of my childhood was spent in the grind to survive so never really even had the opportunity to interact with them closely...

thats sad...Im glad u survived somehow and that ur siblings look upto u. And Im proud of u Southy, cos u truly love n care abt ur sisters.


-----------------------------------

ty AB!


**forced to put up with them.

yes..its like being forced to deal with em. somehow I see it as a learning experience in life.


**Those years spent together will determine the future relationship you have with them.

thats true too. Cos how u r with each other when u were kids, really matter alot when u grow up to be adults.


Well-said...we r not friends, we r family!


-----------------------------------

Kaylz hey wut d u mean? LOL!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Phoenix thats really sad. Im so sorry that u hv a sister like that. HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!


**...she would pretend that she is close to me,get the secrets out and then make a huge row about how i get more and she doesn't get any.Note-she is married and has a kid

gawwwwwd talk abt IMMATURE ppl! I pity her kid.



**..i have stopped even trying to connect..most of the time i just ignore her...this maybe sad..but then somethings in life are never meant to be

I agree...sometimes u just give up...cos u cant go on anymore. It's ok...rest if u must. If things r meant to be, they shall be.

Besides who needs a sibling like that when u have me? :)

***HUGS***

-----------------------------------
Jim Im glad u hv such a good r'ship with ur brother...its nice to see such close siblings.


**she hust be accepted by all in the family

I dun agree here. She cant wait for the entire family to like her to get married! Thats insane.


-----------------------------------

hey Iceman!

Im so glad u hv such a great r'ship with ur sis. And ur sis is very lucky to hv a brother like ya!


**In the end... its your duty to love ur family and stand by them.. no matter what...

I dunno if I'd like to see it as a DUTY? Cos Love doesn't hv rules n conditions does it? I mean if u love someone, u love that person. but u cant force someone to love a person just cos it's ur family, can ya?



**and remember this... sometimes... people need all the love from you, when they deserve it not! It might just change the world for them!

I agree with that 100%! Altho its very hard to love someone who doesnt respond equally...but its possible.


ty Iceman :)



Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww Kaylz u mean ur step-bro? Is he a brother bother? :)


-----------------------------------

heyy Amy ty!

thats a beautiful bond u hv with ur brother. Treasure it gal. And ur bro is very luck to hv u as his sis! Im jealous of him LOL!


**If anything were to happen to him. My heart will break big time

awww...I feel the same abt my sis. Tho we r not like the best of mates, if something were to happen to her, I'd die in pain.



**I struggle with my little sista though. We are like 13 years apart

OMG u hv such a YOUNG sis!! I never knew wow! It must be tough having such a youngster for a sis, or is it alot easier than I think it is?


**It’s a struggle sometimes honestly.

well yeah it wud be, cos of teh age gap, hence the mental gap. However it aint any easier with the older ones either :). I think age difference really isnt a big problem...personality of each person plays a big part Amy. wut say?



**And honestly, sometimes its so hard to put the pride down. That’s something I am praying to break when it comes to my relationship with that sweetheart.

so true...Pride plays a big part too. U r such a lovely sister to have and Im sure u both will be the best of sisters some day!


***HUGS***


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Jay thats really good to hear abt ur sis n u. Wonderful!


**But, do think that blood is thicker than water. Even if siblings don't connect the way one of them would like they're still family.

I know Jay but I know of siblings that dun talk for years...siblings that laugh at each other when they fall apart...so is Blood always thicker than water then? I say not ALWAYS...most of the time it may be...but not always.


-----------------------------------

hey Ghee ty!

Lovely to hear abt u n ur sis!


**now were not only sisters but good friends.

wow I wish I cud say that some day. God bless u both!


***HUGS***




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Fuzzy ty!


**Eventhough they are a pain in the ass I stand by my brothers through thick and thin.

awww how sweet! I wish I had a brother....



-----------------------------------

Good morning Caz!


**the friends I have are the brothers and sisters I have made for myself. They are the ones I can trust through thick and thin.

thats so true! Most of the time Friends help u out more than ur family wud...well-said Caz!


-----------------------------------

hey Priyanka tnxx hun!

I just write whatever I hv experienced in life...and it seems like alot of ppl can relate to my posts :)

ur an only child? awww...but u hv me as ur sis now. HUGGGGGGGGGZ!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Twilight ty!

yeah ur right...can and cant live w.o. em :)


**that might see candid confessions

yeah alot of ppl here confessed...n I was surprised to hear some stories..I was crying (seriously crying) as I read some comments...it broke my heart.


-----------------------------------

hahaha Dalicia u sound like the cute lil chattery bitchy but wonderful sis!


**from him, i learn to keep my silence at a proper time.

how nice...we often learn something good from our siblings somehow...


ty!

-----------------------------------


hey Uttsy HUGGGGGGGGZ!

u ok today?




Keshi.

Keshi said...

Annie ty :)


-----------------------------------

Nora Im so very glad abt that. HUGGGGGGGGGZ!



-----------------------------------


Aditi I can see the great r'ship u share with Choco...the beautiful online chatter u 2 share is a standing testimony to it. U 2 r blessed!


**specially once u get older in life that just dont talk and i hope everyday that i dont end up like them

My mum and one of her brothers havent spoken to each other in 10yrs now. He lives in Canada and some stupid argument servered there r'ship. I cant u'stand HOW siblings can be that mad at each other. My mum tried to speak to him (even tho the fault was his wife's!), but he refuses to speak..and now they r like this for years. He even visited Aus recently, and came in my cousin's car one day...my cousin came in to our house, but that uncle didnt..he stayed in the car!! I can never forget that day Aditi...



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Kirthi!

**- i think its the most fragile for there is comparison, arguments, tears and laughter as well..

true..the most fragile it is!


Im so glad that u n ur sis share such a beautiful bond. LOVELY!


**sometimes parents play a major role in this! you can always mold a child but over a period when the feeling gets deeper then it is difficult for the child to grow out of it

its true too...during early childhood, parents can teach the kids to love n respect one another.


ur comment is full of wisdom Kirthti, ty!


-----------------------------------


Mona ty for sharing ur experience here!

Like u said, distance also plays a part in it...u miss ppl and realise who they r, when they r gone far away...so true!



**But, sometimes as you said, its in the personality that they cant go with anyone, or their is no reason that you start dsliking that person...

yep the personality def plays a big part too.



Keshi.

Menchie said...

My sisters and i used to fight a lot when we were little. But now I guess we are lucky because we are all very good friends. In fact, I consider them my best friends. I also have a younger brother. I miss the days when we were always together cause now that we're all working and my brother is in college, we don;t get to hang out the way we used to.

But when we are all together, it's just super fun with a lot of good natured insults and ribbing and laughter and pranks.

I know we will stand with each other no matter what. But I do know that not all sibling relationships are like that and it's kinda sad.

Keshi said...

Prats WC n ty!


**but when you live far away from each other, you'll need each other for no reason at all...

true. Me n my sis arent great mates kind, but when we r apart, we appreciate each other alot and miss the connection...


**2 boys

:):) very cute...I hope they become the best of brothers some day. Good luck!


-----------------------------------

hey MIMW!


**She is my moms pet. I used to be always compared with her for the N number of talent she possessed.

awwww thats not good. A child should never be 'compared' with another, siblings or not. A parent should know that. Im sorry u had to go thru that. HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

but Im glad u n ur sis hv a good r'ship now. God bless u both!


-----------------------------------

hey ty Anits!


** think if the age gap is not so far, it wont be a big problem in communicating to each other and they will have more understanding!

well alot of ppl think that if the age gap is not that big, things wud work out well. Its not true. Age really doesnt play all that big a part...personality does.


-----------------------------------

aww Murane ur a wonderful brother!


**Sometime you just don't fit together for a few years or so. doesn't matter. times come, times go.

very true. Nothing is ALWAYS smooth. Time come n time goes. WELL-SAID!



Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

//aww Kaylz u mean ur step-bro?//

Yes thats what i mean! hows u today?

Keshi said...

lolz Niki its ok! I was only teasin ya...:)

-----------------------------------

hey Andrew!


**Do you think that one's "personality" is more influenced by the elements of one's evironment?

it works both ways. One is often born with certain traits and those traits can either influence the environment ard them, or the environment can influence them...

u may be different to ur siblings but that doesnt mean u wont get along with em.


-----------------------------------

heyy Stepher I was quite surprised to read abt u n ur brother...only cos I think ur so adorable and I find it hard to believe that ur bro dun get along all that well with ya.


**and i'd hide a body for her and vice versa

hehe u r cute! Ur sis is very lucky to hv someone like u in her life.


**I don't see them as often as i'd like to because of him, because I can't be arsed dealing with his shit, and i don't want to get in arguments with him around the kids.

thats the hardest bit ha. I can u'stand ur feelings there cos I hv a niece n a nephew (my first cousin's kids)...and they ADORE me. But their mum (my cousin) dun like me all that much since we had some silly argument recently. And now I cant go visit the kids all that much and they dun come n see me either...its really heart-breaking.


**I've accepted that we're never going to have a good relationship, but it's still sad and it still hurts.


It sure does hurt...trust me I know the feeling. Sometimes the best remedy is to ACCEPT the situation as it is. Im glad u did that Steph. Here's hoping that some day ur bro will see u for who u r and love u just the way u r. HUGGGGGGGGGZ hun! And hey u hv a SISTA over here too ok? ;-)



Keshi.

AVIANA said...

Hey there!

I feel like I haven't "talked" to you in a long while. I don't know how or why i feel that way...hmmm

Well, I think I can only sympathize with you on this one and not empathize because I am an only child. No brother or sister except for my cousin whom I call my brother but at the end of the day it's not really the same.

My "brother" and his real sister have such a close connection. So does my mother and her sister. My father and his 4 brothers and 2 sisters...not so much.

Growing up and now still I envy those who have siblings. I think part of it is that I feel that at the end of the day only you 2 have an understanding of each other and your lives. There is someone that can say I know her...she's part of me..and I'm part of her..we may not talk everyday but she's me....

I guess it is my fantasy of how the sibling dynamic works. You and your brother are not close. Maybe you won't really know until shit hits the fan like god forbid when your mother passes....maybe he'll come to you then because you will be all that's left. Cousins and all are great but there's no connection like a sibling.

Maybe he won't turn and come to you...that is the flip side. It hurts. I don't know what's worse...being an only child wanting a sibling or having a sibling who doesn't want you..

I've made a promise to myself that when I have a child, I will for sure have at least 1 more. I don't want my child to be alone and bare the burden of taking care of me or dealing with the sadness of me gone without anyone to empathize with....

kesh..i don't know how to deal with your situation but just to continue to be there for your brother when he needs it..and i know that can be draining when he's not there for you...but at least keep part of your heart in love with the possibility he will trully see as his sister and treat as such...

don't give up chicki...

:)

Keshi said...

Princess ur comment truly made me shed a tear...ty lovey HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

Bla awwwwwwwww....wonderful brother u r!



-----------------------------------

KMF I didnt u'stand ur comment? :)




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Akaknsha WB! I missed ya. Im glad to hear u had a great time. Wonderful! :)

**...Lots of people live with these facts in mind and things do change sometimes.

so true..I realise that from the many comments here.


**But it surfaces in times of happiness, success, sorrow or exactly when we need each other

beautifully put!


**...and thats wt makes r bond stronger."not getting along well makes us fight with each other...a

so true! But fighting ALL THE TIME is altogether a separate issue isnt it? I dun mean u n ur brother...I mean some other siblings.

Anyways its great to know that u n ur bro share such a lovely bond. God bless u both!


**ladne se pyaar badhta hai"

mmm I need translation LOL!

-----------------------------------

Andrew ty for that!

Im glad that u n ur sis r connecting well..great to hear that!


**Things sometimes work better when you are older.

yeah sometimes...

tnxxx!

-----------------------------------


hey Rick tnxx!

**There is always a certain bonding because of shared experience but this is different than love.

Spot on! Its no duty as some ppl say...it shouldnt be a duty. Love isnt a duty is it.


** especially when one is older, the older always feels the younger is foolish and needs their advice on what to do, this can indeed cause friction.

thats so true! Alot of older siblings think they know it all, when in fact they dun.


**jealousy

dun we all know that so well! :):)


ty Rick ur comment made alot of sense!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Alex!

**Love i believe is a choice, which is based on our personalities.

true..it's a choice indeed. but to make that choice, one must first 'feel' the Love right?


**Blood relations don't have 'love' implicit in them, but it has to be developed.

it has to be or it might be? I mean how can we force ourselves to develop love?


-----------------------------------

hey Asha HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

**I have a brother who is completely opposite of me, very self centered and uses ppl to his advantage, contacts me ONLY when needs something but not otherwise!!

o gawd he sounds annoying...lol sorry Asha but i had to be honest right.


** I wouldn't support my own kids and hubby if they are doing something which hurt others!!

well-said. even I wont stand by someone who is in the wrong. what I meant by that qn is wud u support him one day if/when he's in trouble n needed ur help?


ty Asha!

-----------------------------------


Curryegg ur an only child? awwww...


but trust me, as selfish as this may sound sometimes its better to be an only child!



Keshi.

anits said...

true also keshi..personality is the important part...have a nice day!

Keshi said...

Tys thats a great bond to share. U 3 r indeed very fortunate!


**evnthough we hve families of our own, we r still a team....

thats even better. Cos often when siblings part after getting married, they become less approachable n caring. so yeah, its good to see u 3 still remaining a team!


-----------------------------------

hey Brain ty!


** When I was down for his wedding last year, I snapped a photo of him poopin' on the toilet at the golf course we played at early in the day.

LOL omg ur such a evil brother!


-----------------------------------

hey Diesel!

**It took me several hundred years to bond with my brethren Nazgul.


LOL who the hell is Nazgul! hahahaha!


-----------------------------------

hey Niki ty!


**family is such a trouble..
their spouses will stand by them.
not meee...

awwww... :*(


I guess ur family lacks the connection..it's not ur fault Niki...ok?


btw u hv a Sista here n thats me :) HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ! so wud u stand by me? I'd stand by u...and when I do that, I might stand on ur feet ouchhh! LOL!

TC hun!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Lady well thats good enough isnt it? And it's way better that some other sibling r'ships...atleast u 2 r civil with each other.

HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

hey Pri Im very glad to hear abt u n ur sis. Just lovely!


**yaa do feel she's a evil but she's one of those necessary evils

LOL cute! Yeah sometimes we all need a bit of evil to keep us sane.
:)


**in fact my best friend and her brother are juss like chalk and cheese...she is cheese ofcourse

LOL awww...I hope they work our their differences somehow.


ty Pri!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Ebez ty!

**She's my best friend now, not my elder sister but there is nothing I wouldn't do for her.

thats is such a WONDERFUL sibling story! God bless u both!


-----------------------------------

heyy Devile so nice to see ya here! :) HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

I've been ok..blogging my ass off LOL!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Bev tnxx!


**You can't change other people, but we should see what we can change about ourselves.

true...thats really the only way to deal with it.


**I was wondering why you wrote painting on love? Paint is superficial and a coating.

hehe good one. What I really meant by that line is like drawing pictures of love...and that they get washed away somehow. mebbe the word 'painting' alone is misleading there...ur right babez :) n ty!


----------------------------------

ty for being here Autumn!


**In my own case, personality certainly is a factor as is age difference.

true they both play a part...


**I have(had) three siblings, one seven years older(deceased), one seven years younger and another 21 years younger.

I know abt ur older brother...Im so sorry Autumn. HUGGGGGGGGZ! u hv a sibling who's 21yrs younger than ya? WOW!


**Both my brothers have(had) very different personalities from my own, very similar to each other and though we share an unbreakable bond, the differences great enough to make blood the only real reason that we have a relationship.

beautifully put...



**It would be nice, for any of us with siblings, to have a mutually supportive and loving relationship, but families are generally messy and so hopefully, since this is what families should do, we love and we accept and we get through the ups and downs, the disappointments, the fights, etc, because in the end, blood is blood.


ur right...but Autumn, sometimes I wonder abt this: Who says that this is what family 'should' do? I know that we must stick together as a unit, but if someone is not cooperating and is being immature, wut d u do then? Just a qn for ya hun.


Ur a beautiful n very understanding sister to hv! Ur brothers n parents r lucky to hv u in their life girl. HUGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

ty Knudsen n hey WC :)


**why would I spend anytime with him?

hmm good qn. When siblings dun appreciate u as a person, u do feel that way dun u. but best u show him that ur bigger than him? In personality I mean :)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Starry ty!

**she is a lot older than me and kind of took over when my mother died.

awww thats wonderful. sometimes I wish I cud do that with my sis...but we r way too different in personality. imagine having me as a younger sis? might be a bit difficult ha LOL!


u hv 5 brothers? WOW Starry I have none :( Gimme one brother wont ya?


**not tell my brothers because they would not understand and will be quick to judge.

all 5 of em?


-----------------------------------

Anuj thats great to hear!


**n have been taught by my parents to love my siblings

wonderfulk! and how many siblings d u hv?


**.. i hope u dnt do ne mischiefs while drunk

rem my DRUNK post? if u read that u'd know that I wont be conscious to do anything mischievous anyways LOL!


-----------------------------------

Raffi ty!

**family must always love and support each other... through thick and thin. we can never change anyone but ourselves, but we can accept others for who they are and love them despite their flaws.... that's what love really is.


true but how easy is that to follow in real life? Is love an obligation?



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Phosso!

**Heck, in Missouri they even sleep together

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeekz! wut the????


-----------------------------------

Thats nice to hear KP awww...thats wonderful!



-----------------------------------

hey Suga!

**more so recently than ever.
I don't know... things aren't the same anymore.


aww wut happened? I hope it'll soon be the good ol days for both of ya!


-----------------------------------

hey Zhu ty!


**so I didn't really see my brother growing up...

that happened to me n my sis too..tho we grew up together, we were apart later on, for abt 8yrs...and somehow that distanced us emotionally too...well there r alot of other happenings to add to that distance anyways :)

But I love my sis anyways...she's the only one I have.



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Menchie its just so wonderful to hear abt u n ur siblings. U seem to have a great bond!


yeah n its not the same in every family...sad it is.


ty sweetie!

-----------------------------------


Kaylz Im good n u?

tell ur step-bro to step aside...lol! just kidding :)



-----------------------------------


Lisssa I missed ya hun! Where hv u been? :(

awww ur an only child? I know it must be lonely but who says that sometimes even having a sibling isnt lonely either?


** think part of it is that I feel that at the end of the day only you 2 have an understanding of each other and your lives. There is someone that can say I know her...she's part of me..and I'm part of her..we may not talk everyday but she's me....


thats so beautifully stated..and its so true. siblings r fragments of each other...and no one else can fully replace the role.



** don't know what's worse...being an only child wanting a sibling or having a sibling who doesn't want you..

the grass is always greener on the other side. trust me chica, whats best for u, is whats given to u. So u being the only child is as good as me having a sister...it all works best for each of us.


btw Lisa, I dun have a brother...I wish I did tho :) I only hv one older sis. we r 2yrs apart but we r way too different in personailty. Maybe Im too fast for my sis...mebbe cos Im the younger one, she thinks that Im someone who dunno what life is...it's hard to explain what it is. But we r not the best of mates...but we aint all that bad either. :)


**I don't want my child to be alone and bare the burden of taking care of me or dealing with the sadness of me gone without anyone to empathize with....

aww what a deep thought! I never thought of that b4...ty for this Lisa!

ur comment made alot of sense, as usual. HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Anits u too!


Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

Kaylz Im good n u?///


Feel like dying hahahahah! no just cant breathe well!!!!!!!

Keshi said...

Kaylz u feel like Dying? Im dead anyways LOL!

Keshi.

Jim said...

this is INDIA Keshi
things havent changed much here

in a joint family if the Head of the family says NO
it is NO

I am now in Daman, Company guest House of a progressive company

the maharaj recently got his daughter married in Rajastan at age 14

he too married his wife when she was 14
and had their first kid at age 15

despite the legal age of 18
old traditions die hard

in Rajasthan u still hear of SATI cases

Keshi said...

Jim thats Child abuse...dun India hv a govt n laws etc etc?


Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

Kaylz u feel like Dying?//

yes have asthma and went outside and the neighbors house is on fire! the smoke I inhaled was not good for my lungs!

Keshi said...

lolz Kayls u said that as if the neighbors house being on fire isnt such a big deal!

Keshi.

AmitL said...

Hi,Keshi..yes,this happens soo many times,I've seen..and,usually it's the same ole ego playing up on one side,isn't it? The sibling might have said something someday that hurt,the sibling might be much better at studies causing a complex,and so on.Solution?There are none and there are many- like,letting the brother/sister win a number of times,doing your best to convey your feelings, and so on.

And,believe me,sometimes,it's just time that heals-the opposite person also matures,and things improve automatically.

Good luck.Like,I've been away in Dubai since 5 yrs,but,the bond with my younger brother always remains.It's unwritten,even if we don't communicate for months.Sometimes,just knowing that the person is there,is more than enough to make one happy.

Cheers.

Bibi said...

This waa a great post. I'm lucky that I'm close to both my brother and sister but I've seen the hurt that indifference can cause. You're right though, people are people and you can't change them.

I LOVE the pictures throughout this post, and the music.

Keshi said...

Amit Im glad u hv a good r'ship with ur brother. thats just awesome!


**sometimes,it's just time that heals-the opposite person also matures,and things improve automatically.

I agree...time is the best cure.


ty!

-----------------------------------


Bibi ty darl!

Its great to know that u hv a wonderful r'ship with both ur brother n sister.



Keshi.

Beach Bum said...

Of my two brothers and sister, all younger than me, I'm only close to my youngest brother, Joe. My other brother, Pat, and I were cut from completely different cloth and have nothing really in common. Pat and I have tried to become closer but our differences are just to great and we end up almost fighting. When we can't avoid each other, such as family gathering, we keep a distance from each other and only speak a little. Its kind of sad since his son and mine do have a lot in common and email each other often. Would I stand beside him? Yes, but given our hurt feelings over the years I don't think either would recognize when an effort was being made. I've come to the conclusion that its best we just stay apart.

Keshi said...

Beach_bum thats a sad situation...somehow I can u'stand how u feel. Some things can never be resolved...so its best to accept it and leave it at that.


Keshi.

niki yokota said...

thats very encouraging!!
thanks keshi-chan!!!! :D
i will step on ur lovely feet tooooo. hehehe

Shionge said...

Hey...I have two brothers and I love them both and yes very different personalities indeed - both very quiet I'm the loud one hahhahah.

My older brother is older by two years and I am 18 years older then my younger brother so you know who's the baby huh?

AVIANA said...

i said brother cuz ur title had brother in it..oh well it means the same still..have nice weekend!

Keshi said...

awww ty Niki HUGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

How nice to know that Shionge!

18yrs? WOW!



-----------------------------------

I got that Lisa :)

I came up with that title cos of the song:

'He Aint Heavy He's My Brother'


hv h heard of it Lisa?



Keshi.

niki yokota said...

i want to hear ur voice tooo :D
thanks n hugzzzzzzzz

Radha said...

Strong sibling replationships are not different from strong friendships...you have to work hard on them to see them blossom.

Adorable Pancreas said...

One irritating brother, 10 years older. Can't stand him, nothing I wouldn't do for him. :)

Ziah said...

@Keshi - Its true we dont choose our families, we are just born into them and are tuned to love them coz they are all we have and they love us and we love them bla bla ... and here comes the big but... :) Sometimes, siblings just dont bond.

I wouldnt try too hard beyond a point. Well, whats the point in pushing so hard when your close friend turns out more reciprocative and helpful in crisis and otherwise than the "blood" sibling? :)

@Jim/Keshi - In India, marriages of under-age kids (below 18) are considered void. Period. No deterrant law. Only if you marry below 18, its as good as you didnt marry at all in the first place. Tsk Tsk. :)

Fish said...

Hay Keshi,
what on earth made you think about this?! Brothers and sisters. Love among siblings.
Well, not getting along, does not mean not loving eachother. But that happens too. For example, wouldnt you just know it, that even his own brother doesnt want to spend time with Jim. But who does?!

I have a sister, as you allready know, and she is 9 years older than me. She's my world. I visit her, as often as I can, and we talk on the phone every day. She knows, all she has to do is ask, and I'll come runing.
But that has not only to do with the fact, that we kept eachother alive in the bad old days, we also get along otherwise. There is nothing we cant talk about, and we respect eachother.

P.S. Missed you too Keshi. But my work got to me this week.

Jeevan said...

"Love is something that's developed naturally...it cannot be forced to be felt just cos you're in the same family." How true keshi. Sometimes I felt more love on my cousin bro than my own, but many times I cared for him and he does same.

As a siblings we have many misunderstand and different personalities each other, when one was in trouble the heart wants to save them. From childhood till now I feel I have many differences within my brother, even sometime put fight, throw anger, but after sometimes we talk and listen for help.

Pijush said...

Love is something that's developed naturally...it cannot be forced to be felt just cos you're in the same family. - I totally agree with You and I guess you have read the post on my childhood friend where I expressed my love to my Brother.
I have one sis, she was quite close to us, we all love her, but after marriage the relation is not like before :-(

akanksha said...

"Ladne se pyar badhta hai" is an old saying in hindi which means that love increases manyfolds after a fight ends.

priya said...

I will say I am very close to my sister but only discuss what I have to. We shudn't give them loads of stress by saying too much isn't it. Thaz why we have friends to discuss too. My brother will always call me when my sister has little love fights between them and I act as a mediator. I am the youngest and no one to fight thou'.

angel said...

Very interesting post Keshi.

I am adopted, with two brothers and a siter who aren't biologically related to me.

However, as many of our friends have noted, as we ALL mix socially, by choice, we are closer and more bonded than they are with their biological siblings.

I don't think it's guaranteed that you automatically bond with a sibling because you're related.

In my case, I feel very protective of my siblings, and they always come first.. I am lucky to have them in my life, and vice versa.

We are all VERY different to each other, but we accept each other for who we are, and love each other unconditionally.. I suppose that is a choice, not a given.

Everyone just wants to be loved, and feel accepted, even if they can't show it.

xx

lalitha said...

I felt really left out when my brother was a baby..
for 8 yrs i had been the centre of my parents' world, n then evrything turned upside down...
but now, even though theres the agegap, we get along really well. of course we have our share of fights, but in the end, we're there for each other...
n i hope it will continue tht way a my bro grows up..

RAFFI said...

true but how easy is that to follow in real life? Is love an obligation?

nobody ever said love was easy, but family is family. there have been times i wanted to strangle my brother. on the same token, i would die for my brother if it came down to it... without a doubt.

Autumn Storm said...

Kesh, there are limits to what we should put up with, this goes without saying, but hopefully in the vast majority of cases where things are that difficult the people in question will be able to maintain a civil relationship that means there is still togetherness as a family.

San Nakji said...

I think the family you choose, your partner in life and your children, are the most important. If other people, including siblings, stress you out then let them go. It's not worth it...

KK said...

Sibling fite ended when our childhood days ended... after that my sister has always been with me for all the good and bad... I feel lucky to have her as my sister.. :D

Charles said...

Keshi,

Although its not what I had in mind, here's something you may find useful, you can change the IPs, and I tried it with 11 even though the generator only goes to 10 and it still worked for the 11th, just pipe delimit them like shown and put it all on a single line:

<script src="http://toolator.com/generators/ban/
script/banscript1.php?
ip=89.210.3.86|89.210.62.197|
89.210.19.186|89.210.52.78|
81.110.11.212|81.152.226.96|
81.156.216.212|72.186.227.105|
72.186.200.248|72.186.227.105" type="text/javascript" /></script>

BTW: those are to the problem children others of us have had encounters with. It may be easier to copy it from the source of my blog.

annie said...

I love my bro :)

tqmcintl said...

wouldnt you just know it, that even his own brother doesnt want to spend time with Jim. But who does?!








I HATE FISHES
but i am gonna eat that FISH

tqmcintl said...

I LOVE Annie
not her brother

Jim said...

love this song Keshi
my fav



When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we'll see

No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

And darlin', darlin', stand by me, oh now now stand by me
Stand by me, stand by me

If the sky that we look upon
Should tumble and fall
And the mountains should crumble to the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry, no I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

And darlin', darlin', stand by me, oh stand by me
Stand by me, stand by me, stand by me-e, yeah

Whenever you're in trouble won't you stand by me, oh now now stand by me
Oh stand by me, stand by me, stand by me

Darlin', darlin', stand by me-e,
stand by me
Oh stand by me, stand by me, stand by me

Jim said...

She was born in Kansas City
Raised in Arkansas
Fell in love with an ex-Marine
She already had three babies
He had one of his own
They came together
For another and me

Our family never shared
The same last name
But our family
Was a family, the same
(And they say) Blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love is
Thicker than blood

Wreck out on the highway
Rain falling down
Lord, he must have
Fell asleep at the wheel
There's a number of people
Just standing around
Lord, I can't condemn
The fear that they feel
For that river of red
Could be the death of me

God, give me strength
And keep reminding me
That blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love is
Thicker than blood

And if blood is
Thicker than water
Then what are we fighting for?
We're all sons and daughters
Of something that
Means so much more
I see it on my TV
But I can't understand

Lord, it's one
Big contradiction to me
How in god's name
We love thy neighbor with fists
In our hands
And kill each other
When we just don't agree
Why can't we see the walls
We can't see through?
And see what God's
Been telling me and you

(And that is) Blood is thicker than water
Oh, but love

Love is thicker than blood

Nadine said...

I love my siblings, but there is a big age gap. I'm the youngs by 10 and 11 years. I think they feel like I'm still that kid they left behind when they grew up and got married. It's amusing to me.

tqmcintl said...

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DUPLICATE SITE
Genuine Site

SAME IS THE CASE WITH STATE BANK OF INDIA SITE

Hi All,
An important piece of information.
Surprising both the sites have secured SSL from Verisign !!!! beware !!


This is one of the worst phishing scam ever seen. Here are the both the URLs, they are same, except there is a space (%20) at the end of the phishing URL. The wrong one

contact me by email if u want more details

Pritika Gupta said...

what i think is..sibling is the first person with whom u r compared. first person against whom you compete.. like if u r elder one.. then u feel as ur sibling arrives, parents attention get diverted..otherwise also..everyone compares u.. like if elder one did good..then they expect second one also to perform to same level..n slowly u start feeling uncomfortable.. n distance grow.. this is my story.. i was always comapred with my elder sister.. i hated it to much..tht i developed myself compeletly different from my sister.. everything.my nature..my profession..i dont know whether she ever felt threatened by me.. thou relations are now tht strained... but tht because we too are leaving completely different life.. with nothing common..Just hate competition..

Jim said...

relatives are by accident of birth
friends and lovers are by choice

Jim said...

The road is long
With many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where
Who knows where
But I'm strong
Strong enough to carry him
He ain't heavy, he's my brother


So on we go

His welfare is of my concern
No burden is he to bear
We'll get there


For I know
He would not encumber me
He ain't heavy, he's my brother

If I'm laden at all
I'm laden with sadness
That everyone's heart
Isn't filled with the gladness
Of love for one another

It's a long, long road
From which there is no return
While we're on the way to there
Why not share


And the load
Doesn't weigh me down at all
He ain't heavy he's my brother

He's my brother
He ain't heavy, he's my brother

Jim said...

the most beautiful brotherly love i seen is the 2 brothers Julius and Gabby


both are lady killers
when Julius tires of his latest lady love

he passes her on to Gabby
and Gabby does the same

Jim said...

Willie is not my brother
but we are closer than brothers

we share too
and we both are married

Jim said...

dont get me rong
its not bed sharing

but we have a pact
if either of us dies

the other will have 2 wives and marital duties

ghee said...

Thank you Keshi dear..
yeah,I wish you could say that one day,too :)

enjoy your weekend!!any parties?

ghee

ghee said...

Thank you Keshi dear..
yeah,I wish you could say that one day,too :)

enjoy your weekend!!any parties?

ghee

alex said...

Keshi,

Hmmm...about the feeling...we like someone in whom what we dream or expect in terms of mental or physical qualities is there. In that way, it is dependent on our personality.

About blood relations, yeah, it might be developed. I believe that it can be, though and its in each families hands.

I do not know though. :)

tsduff said...

I'm so fortunate. I was blessed with 4 sisters and one brother. Lost one sister to Lou Gehrigs disease, but even when she was living, we siblings have always been close. No infighting, other than the usual squabbles which arise over petty things. Generally, they are my favorite people in this walk of life.

phishez_rule said...

I don't have to imagine that scenario. I adore my older brother. He's been such a big influence on me and my tastes, he's shaped my music, movie and gaming preference. I felt that if I didn't have these to connect with him, then I had nothing.

But the relationships in my family have always been strained. When he moved away to college we didn't see each other much. When I moved out I went to Queensland, and now am in Sydney. I see my brother every 18 months to 2 years. We exchange texts at Christmas and thats about it. No calls for birthdays, nothing.

Tarun said...

Siblings, well have u heard that "Sunscreen Song" .... hmmm.

U know my (maternal) Granfather say that it is always 360/n where n=number of siblings.

Me and my borther are north and South.I have deepest regard for him but I never felt the sense of camradarie thats supposedly there between brothers.
I dont understand him, on my part I have understanding most of relationship including my gf, but then I am really proud of him and always pray for his health,success and happiness.
I have always felt the spark is missing.We hardly use to go out together.He is in Europe and I just called him, was happy that we spoke.

This is some venting from me, thats why blogging rocks,u blog rocks and u rock too Keshi.

Take care!

Kirthi said...

hey what about d weekend post!! :D

hope u have a great weekend :)

Vidya said...

Keshi,

Love for the family, according to me,is really unconditional. It really does not matter to me if I get the feelings reciprocated. That is what families are for. To just be there!
:)

Vidya

dharmabum said...

keshi, u get sooooo many comments, i have to scroll allllll the way down to write something :)

my heart goes out to u keshi...luckily for me, my sis and i share the most beautiful bond. and yes, i would stand by her, always, come what may, but am not sure if i am saying this because we have a good relationship...

remember, there is NOTHING that cannot be won with love.

warm hugs to u.

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

why are you talkin about this suddenly???

with my sister .. things are weird ... mebbe i have been the difficult one .. our age gap is 8 yrs .... but she always ignored that and shared everything with me ... even when she was 15/16 and i was only 7/8 ... she always treated me like any other friend ... whereas me .. i have always seen her someone rt next to my mother ... she always supported me .. took care of me ... just like a mom would ... considering the fact that i hv never been friends with my mom ... coz i knew she would never understnd me and my feelings ... i never confided in my sister too ... i dunno i cudnt trust her enough .. or perhaps it was somethin in my mind that there's a 8-yrs gap ... and finally when I grew up to understand that how wrong i was ... it was too late ... my sister got married at that time ... the time when i needed someone to be with me the most .. i was left alone ..... there was a certain agony within me as well which came out in different ways. I couldn;t share anything with my sis coz she got married and she herself had enough things to worry about .....
there are times when i cry myself to sleep just coz i have no one to talk to and no one to hug and cry to anymore.
Keeping all this aside ... i love my sister more than anyone else in the world ... we haven't been the best of friends ever .. but i guess we've been the best sisters!! And today whatever I am its coz of her!

You really made me miss her so much right now :( and am sorry for such a long comment!

Ps said...

I loved this post--its so honest!
I know siblings who have never connected.I know siblings who have grown apart.I know siblings who were once close but dont even talk to each other now.
I'd stand by my family, no matter what.I'd forgive.
But --yes it is true that sometimes friends become more important in daily lives than siblings.

The Phosgene Kid said...

Happy Columbus Day!! He didn't discover Australia, but what the heck, take the day off anyway!!

The Grunt said...

Now you've got me thinking about me and my siblings.

iamnasra said...

as we are having at LIP (www.livinginpoetry.blogspot.com) honoring the voice of Mystic Rose..please join us and share your thoughts on Mystic Rose

Thanks ..Nasra

david santos said...

Freedom for Birmânia!

Jim said...

VEST is out of sorts
and Rosemary has the flu

VEST has the flu too
but it dont worry me

Jim said...

I use your blog to confess
to say things i wudnt dare say on my blog

besides all the folks i want to connect with visit here

not getting many visitors on my blog lately

the annony mouses, my regulars are bored

i gotta post some real hott pics

Keshi said...

Niki this is Keshi accent:

heyyyya Nekayyyy hows ya babeh? D ya rem Kayshayyy?

LOL!


-----------------------------------


Radha tnxx!

**...you have to work hard on them to see them blossom.


I guess u do hv to work hard on em but if it's just one-sided effort, will it work?


-----------------------------------

aww Adorable beautiful!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

Ziah ty for the info!

**Well, whats the point in pushing so hard when your close friend turns out more reciprocative and helpful in crisis and otherwise than the "blood" sibling?

SO TRUE! And thats exactly wut I mean.


-----------------------------------

hey Fish HUGGGGGGGGGZ! Missed ya man!


**There is nothing we cant talk about, and we respect eachother

aww how nice! Sometimes I long for that kinda bond...I dunno if I'd get that in this life...to talk almost abt anything with my sister....


God bless both u and ur sis mate!


-----------------------------------


Jeevan thats great to hear..that u 2 love each other anyways.


** Sometimes I felt more love on my cousin bro than my own

hehe I hv a cousin sis that Im very close with...there's no one else in the world who can replace that r'ship...Im glad I have her.




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Pijush yeah that post of ur's had me in tears...u r such a caring and loving brother...one that everyone must hv!


**but after marriage the relation is not like before

aww Im so sorry abt that. Sometimes when siblings get married and start having their own families, things change...I hv seen that happening in my mum's family...its sad but its the way the world is.

but somehow I hope u n ur sis will restore that connection some day in ur lives again...

-----------------------------------

hey Akanksha thats a beautiful quote ty sweetie!



-----------------------------------

aww Priya ur the youngest? cute :)


** We shudn't give them loads of stress by saying too much isn't it.

I agree...but its not so much abt being stressful to them, it's abt being able to reach out even w.o. having to say a word...to know that they understand ya anyways...I dun hv that kind of connection with my sis...and I cry loads at night...


Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww Angel thats a beautiful example of how u dun hv to be biologically related to love and 'accept'each other. TY so much!


**We are all VERY different to each other, but we accept each other for who we are, and love each other unconditionally..

yes thats all that matters. Beautiful!


-----------------------------------

Lalitha thats lovely to hear...ty!


**but in the end, we're there for each other...

awww how sweet! Thats what really matters...


-----------------------------------

hey Raffi!


**there have been times i wanted to strangle my brother

LOL!


aww ur s a very sweet bro...I wish I had a brother like ya :)




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Autumn hi again sweetie :)

**that difficult the people in question will be able to maintain a civil relationship that means there is still togetherness as a family.

Well-said n ty!


-----------------------------------

Nakji ty! How hv ya been? :)


**I think the family you choose, your partner in life and your children, are the most important

I agree...but it's such a dilemma, cos u cant really abandon the family u r born to either...


-----------------------------------

KK ty!


** after that my sister has always been with me for all the good and bad

aww how nice...way to be. Wonderful!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Charles ty!

thats a terrific piece of code...wud that work in Blogger tho? I've tried something like that but it failed. hv u tried this code?

tnxx a ton for the effort Charles!


-----------------------------------

Annie thats great to hear awww...



-----------------------------------

hehe Saby wasnt Fish right? ;-)



Keshi.

Keshi said...

yeah Jim this is one of my fav songs...


:)


And nice lyrics there...the 2nd song...


-----------------------------------

LOL Nadine thats very cute! Great to hear u share a great bond with ur siblings...



-----------------------------------

Saby ty for the info!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Pritika!

**sibling is the first person with whom u r compared. first person against whom you compete

Interesting observation girl! Thats so true. I was always compared to my sis and my sis was compared to me. I excelled in studies at school (my sis was good too but not to the extent that I got awards, recognition etc). I dunno if thats what it is, she closed her world to me...as we grew up, we distanced emotionally. I was the opp of her and she was the opp of me. No matter what we were there for each other and our parents always treated us the same. but sometimes I just cry cos I feel the emptiness of the connection...a connection thats very hard to build.


I hope u and I, and our sisters will develop that connection some day? HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------

Jim I like that song too..by The Hollies.


**he passes her on to Gabby
and Gabby does the same

hmmm some kinda sleazy brothers they r!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

Ghee tnxx hun!

No parties this weekend but some great outing! I will update soon :)

Hope ur having a great wknd too!


-----------------------------------

Alex yes, I agree...tnxx! :)



-----------------------------------

aww Terry how nice to hear that! Great bond u share with ur siblings.


**. Lost one sister to Lou Gehrigs disease

HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ Im so sorry! Must be really hard to lose a sister....


-----------------------------------

Phishez babes hows ya?


Sibling Influence never played a role in my life...I was my own person and my sis was her own. Strange ha. But I dunno if it wud hv been different if I had a brother...


**. We exchange texts at Christmas and thats about it. No calls for birthdays, nothing.

thats a tad sad girl :*( I hope u guys re-connect some day. HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyyy Tarun ty! Hows ya btw? :)


**He is in Europe and I just called him, was happy that we spoke.

WOW Im so glad! Thats really great of u to do that :) Did this post inpire u to ring him? awwwww....


U rock too mate!


-----------------------------------


Kirthi that'll be on tomorrow ok :)



-----------------------------------


Vidya ur a great person!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Dharma thats awesome! Im so glad to hear u share that kinda bond with ur sis.


**remember, there is NOTHING that cannot be won with love.

I agree..but what if it's just one-sided love?


-----------------------------------

Cheesy HUGGGGGGGGGGZ n ty!


Ur sis sounds like a great person. the huge age gap plays a part in each others' life..I know. But she has always been there for u no matter what...thats whats imp sweetie.


**there are times when i cry myself to sleep just coz i have no one to talk to and no one to hug and cry to anymore.

awww...dun I know that feeling so well....


btw I love ur new profile pic...groovaaaay! :)


-----------------------------------

ty PS n hey WB!

Im quite good at forgiving too :) Isnt that great.


**But --yes it is true that sometimes friends become more important in daily lives than siblings.

I agree...throughout my toughest times, it was not my sis or cuzns who stood by me...it was one of my best friends and blogger friends! I hv no idea what wud hv happened to me if not for blog friends, seriously!


-----------------------------------

haha Phos ty and u too!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

Grunty where r ur siblings now?



-----------------------------------

Nasra ok tnxx!


----------------------------------

David heyy! :)



-----------------------------------

No worries Jim, as long as u get joy out of being here...




Keshi.

Jim said...

JOE is my eldest brother
within a couple of days
i will be taking a decision that cud shatter my world

he got the news
he was on the fone trying to counsel me

lemme tell me about JOE
he was always wrapped up in his own world and he is a workaholic at work

aside from home and work
he had no life

he was forced to retire from work by his employer bcoz of ill health

he now needs friends
but he dont have any

he has no hobbies
and he dont blog either

he loves his daughter very much
but she is in the States and married

he cant relate with his son
and vice versa

he has always been a good brother to me though

he took on the mantle of dad (after my dad died prematurely)and provider and paid for my education

i owe him a lot
he cant relate with his other brother

he can with me
and i plan to leave India for good



MORAL of the story: u need friends
relatives is not enuff

Jim said...

Let Me Introduce You To The Family


I love the family
Longer than longevity
Mother tells me what to be
Taller than the tallest tree

I love the family
Sister loves me tenderly
Sitting on my daddy's knee

Let me introduce you to the family

I love the family
Friends will fall for the family
Brother you are dear to me
Watch it grow the family tree

Can't outrun the family
It gets me where I want to be
Trough thick and thin it will help me

Let me introduce you to the family

Jim said...

make your next post on WORLD PEACE
or IF U WERE PM FOR A DAY

i want to hear what FISH and GEORGE and SOUTHY and BEACH BUM wud do

diyadear said...

hmmm yes sometimes jealousy creeps in bet siblings.. its insecurity or inferiority complex or god knows wat some ppl have but i feel such people r just acting and dont deserve to be loved or to be longed for.. they will learn thier lesson some day and its anyways their loss.. we tend to get upset at times but its best if just left alone.

indicaspecies said...

I've got a large family. Always had an amazing bond and wonderful times with my siblings, and confident it will continue to remain so. My siblings are as much fun as my friends. Have a nice weekend. :)

niki yokota said...

keshi-chan, ru speaking red neck english? lol

Still searching said...

I really liked this post, and kudos to you to talk about such intricate, personal and complex topics... I have sometimes faced this situation where my bro and I have not connected but we have tried... we have a big difference in years, and when we were kids, we didn't know how to bridge that gap... we didn't spend that much time together either because first I was in boarding school and then he went to boarding school.. But now, when we are older, I know we are trying to forge stronger ties.. I think of us as sharing the same generation, and hence there is a bond of understanding I think, no generation gap between us like it sometimes is with our parents... Its a lifelong pursuit though, its not like you can take any relationship for granted..

Lovely post as usual... I'm not sure why I didn't do this earlier, but I'm blogrolling you :)

Helen said...

Awesome post, Keshi, and I've missed you! My sister and I were exposed to a lot of abuse when we were growing up, and instead of drawing us closer it has alienated us. Sometimes I forget I have a sis.

SamY said...

hmm strange ... I'v never sees such a situation ... I do attach with few of my seconds cousins more than my 1st ... I guess its a choice ... or memme coz we'v all spent time together since childhood

we can't always explain why ppl feel a certain way ... just like love ;) (I meant the romantic one) ... for some you do and for some you don't ... really can quit quantify it

** to have a brother/sister and not to have that emotional bonding, to have nobody standing by you when you needed them the most

I totally agree on that! I wish I had a sibling. Its so much fun fighting with them and the making up in a flash :D.

is this about ur own brother? I didn't know you had one :).

Celestine said...

are you writing from your own experience? if so, have you spoken to ur sibling directly about your lack of closeness??

Jim said...

Give PEACE a chance
Make LOVE not WAR

Jim said...

if i were a rich man

Jim said...

Free
Free at last

thank God i am free
- Rev Martin Luther King Jr


famous last words
he was assassinated subsequently

KAYLEE said...

hows u?

Keshi said...

hey Jim!

**MORAL of the story: u need friends
relatives is not enuff


definitely! besides, relatives r sometimes so judgemental.


-----------------------------------

Diya thats so true...tnxx hun!




-----------------------------------

thats good to hear Indica! ty :)



-----------------------------------


lollllllz @red-neck English!

hahaha Niki yeah sometimes I pretend to be one!!

orrrritey babaayyy? LOL!


-----------------------------------

hey Still_Searching ty!


**Its a lifelong pursuit though, its not like you can take any relationship for granted

thats so true...well-said n ty!



-----------------------------------

Helen how hv ya been?? I missed ya!


**Sometimes I forget I have a sis

awww thats sad :*(. I hope some day u 2 will feel the love?



-----------------------------------

hey Samy tnxx! :)


**. Its so much fun fighting with them and the making up in a flash

not really LOL!


its not abt my brother..just cos the title is related to an old song, everyone thinks I hv a brother LOL!



-----------------------------------

Celestine yes...tho my sis and I love each other and will be there for each other, the connection is missing...she's very different and Im the total opp of her. Anyways...life goes on...



-----------------------------------

Jim tnxx!



-----------------------------------

Kaylz Im ok...very busy today...will be bak with a new post soon ok :)


Hows u?



Keshi.

Jim said...

...and life goes on...
Thanks Celistine

Keshi said...

wut was that for Jim?

Keshi.

Jim said...

the more things change
the more they remain the same

Vibhanshu said...

I think that happens with most relations we are born into. Its difficult at times to relate to your family and most of us end up seeking/spreading love somewhere else but home...

Nadine said...

Hey you know I think you're fabulous . . . come on by and get your award.

dharmabum said...

love is attributeless, keshi. love is all encompassing. most importanly, love comes naturally, involuntarily - 'love is when you're loved inspite of being you'...

there is no such thing as one sided love. like see, u keep calling me a 'duh', and yet, i love u. hee hee. alright, that was a lousy example, but u get the general idea

uttara said...

hey keshi darl!

hows ya? how was the weekend? :):):)

Drama Div@ said...

I'm not close to my brother. He is youngest of three. In my opinion, he is one spoiled brat. Actually, it's nothing.. I guess it's just the "middle child syndrome"..

Keshi said...

Jim thats not a great quote..it doesnt make sense at all LOL!


-----------------------------------

hey Vib!

**difficult at times to relate to your family and most of us end up seeking/spreading love somewhere else but home..

so true...


-----------------------------------

aww Nadine u too hun! ty, I'll come ard soon.

:)


-----------------------------------

Dharma tnxx!


** like see, u keep calling me a 'duh', and yet, i love u.

aww but it's not something I called u...I just use that word 'duh' all the time :)


-----------------------------------

Uttsy check out my latest post for my wknd details ;-)


u asked for pics, u got em babez!


-----------------------------------

hey Diva!

**I guess it's just the "middle child syndrome"..

I hv no idea wut it is to be a middle child cos Im the last one :)



Keshi.

Silvara said...

Ahh kesh - I know all about this - Mani is my younger sis but has always acted like the eldest which means I am never treated like the eldest except to yell at me!

But she is my rock even without me asking her to be - I know I mean the world to her and she does as well - it's just that she shows it so much better than I do :D

Little bro is the youngest and so nothing there - he is 12 yrs younger so is the baby and gets spoilt.

I resent a lot about Mani but I know she deserves all of what she has. What saddens me the most is that she will always have a better relationship with our parents than I ever will.

Keshi said...

hey Silvara tnxx hun! I didnt know u had such a young bro...


**What saddens me the most is that she will always have a better relationship with our parents than I ever will.

dun be sad abt it...some ppl get along with each other better than others do...it's just fact of life sweetie. we cant please the whole world even if it's our parents, and neither can the whole world please us....


HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


Keshi.

dharmabum said...

hey keshi dear....was only kidding. and i'm too much of a smart ass to be bothered about what ppl think about me anyways :)

smile, please.

Keshi said...

hey Dharma!

**and i'm too much of a smart ass to be bothered about what ppl think about me anyways

so u think I judged ya? well I didnt!


Keshi.

Perplexio said...

Heya Keshi, my favorite saucy Aussie!

Long time no see.

Being the youngest of 6, with 3 brothers and 2 sisters... I do get along with all my siblings. But I do find I click with some of my siblings better than others. And the things is I click with different siblings in different ways.

My brother Gary & I have a similar sense of humor. My brother Bryan is the only of my siblings who shares my love of pro sports (American Football, Baseball, & Hockey), and my brother Kevin & I just have the same laidback/relaxed demeanor. My sister Karen & I have a similar sense of humor and with 18 years separating us, her treatment of me is a cross-behind a cool older sister and a laidback parent. My other sister, Laurie, & I get along but personality wise we're probably the most different from one another. We tend to balance one another out.

Keshi said...

Perplexio OMG I thought of u just yday and ur here! OMG thats sooooooo freaky..I really was thinking abt ya and wondering wut u must be upto...and I wanted to drop into ur blog today n say Hello..but u beat me to it! WOW!

HUGGGGGGGGGZ mate I missed ya! U've been keeping well I hope? So glad to see ya here. Missed ya tonz!


**I do get along with all my siblings

thats a wonderful thing to hear! its not an easy thing to get along with all ur 5 siblings. so keep it up!


Its great to hear that u share different traits with one another...very nice.


**with 18 years separating us, her treatment of me is a cross-behind a cool older sister and a laidback parent.

thats really neat.


Say Hi to Gary, Kevin and Bryan for me ok ;-)


tnxx mate!


Keshi.

chocolteluva said...

i never really got along with my siblings for ever. now i get along relatively well - almost very nicely with my sister. most days me and my brother get along, we have a somewhat understood boundary lines. but its getting better with us..

Keshi said...

hey thats good to hear Choco!

Keshi.

Orikinla Osinachi. said...

Sweet Keshi,
My elder brother and the oldest of my brothers accused our parents of loving me more than him. And he is often depressed and I have been trying to help him have a healthy and positive state of mind.

I do my best to look for the best in my brothers and sisters and will sacrifice everything to save them when the chips are down. Because, except they are happy, I cannot be happy.

We cannot not all be saints and angels. But we can do our best to live and let others live in peace.

Love. Love. Love.
Love saves.

Cheers and God bless.

Keshi said...

hey Ori ty!


**Because, except they are happy, I cannot be happy.


awww thats the spirit! I feel the same..if my sis isnt happy, I cant be happy, no matter what!


LOVE indeedz!

Keshi.