I know why I'm dateless...cos I'm not so desperate. LOL ok I don't mean that those who date often are desperate *BOINK! a rotten Tomato hits Keshi's head*. Peace! Just that I was thinking about it the other day, cos I see girls around me Dating at the drop of a hat, whereas I'm that same single girl, who wouldn't move her ass off the couch even if Gerard Butler was in front of her down on his knees with pink roses asking her out *Love Story music plays at the back*. Yes, I'm difficult. Let's just say I'm not so crazy about Dating, unless I get both emotionally and intellectually stimulated by the guy, which btw is quite rare. Why is that? Cos guys like that are rare. LOL! Cmon, isnt that true? I mean you can't Date or possibly think of Dating every guy that's interested in you! There have been alot of romantic proposals that I have rejected big time, only cos I sensed nothing 'real' happening from taking it any further. You may tell me that you've got to try before you know what can happen. But after my Ex and I broke up, I have sort of stopped 'scanning' for love. Not that I have been affected by that last relationship, but I just want Love to happen when it's ready for me...to come to me on it's own. I don't wanna search for it...cos the best things in life come to you when you stop looking for them *talk about stopping the Search, it seems it has halted til the year 2055!*.
Coming back to the Dating part...the only Date I went on after THE Breakup was with Mr.Darcy in Jan 2007. Some of you already know that very short Love story (read Mr.Darcy Meets Keshi, The Happiness Of The Pursuit, and A Cinderella Story from my 2007 archives, if you want to know). The reason I even decided to go out with Mr.Darcy after he asked me out was cos he really did sound like a GREAT guy...and he did stimulate me both emotionally and intellectually on the first day wet met. He was crazy about me...he didn't even know who I was but he soon started talking to me and was making plans straight away. Everything he said just clicked, and trust me that's a rare happening in my life. He was great company, a good conversationalist, a decent guy with a great sense of humor and a high thinker. Though I don't like rushing things, especially relationships, I kind of liked his honesty and quick thinking. He asked me out the next day itself, he was making wedding plans on the 2nd day *rolling eyes* and we broke up in just 7 days, and he told me very hurtful things and ended it, and all from TXT messages (wasn't man enough to meet me and say it all). LOL there you go! Such are my Dates and that's why I'm hesitant to go out with a guy just like that. NO THANK YOU! What seemed like Gold at first sight, was only Dust after 7 days. No I'm not trashing him, but what I'm saying is that what you see is not what you always get. Having said that, does that mean someone who does NOT emotionally and intellectually stimulate you at first could be Gold later on? :) Maybe...maybe not. I don't know the answer to that. All I know is right now I'm quite comfy being not-so-desperate and dateless, woohoo! ;-)
So, to spice up this post, I wanna add a list of things that a guy should never (I mean NEVER) do on a first Date. You can add to this list in the comment section. Guys can write about what a girl should never do on a first Date, and girls can write about what a guy should never do on a first Date. Ok so here's my list of DON'Ts:
*Dress torn/smelly clothes
*Dress torn/smelly clothes
Please note that you're on a Date, not a Charity assessment. So guys please look good and smell nice!
*Ignoring your breath
Don't go there and prove to your Date that you're the number one Halitosis case in your country that needs emergency treatment! Please do brush your teeth and freshen up your breath even if it takes 10 Listerine bottles to bomb your breath - before you leave home, not in front of her!
*Pick your nose/teeth/ears
*Pick your nose/teeth/ears
If you ever do any of the above when you're on a Date with a girl like me, I'd just get up and walk away...on the way, I'd report you to the Police for Mental harassment using disgusting techniques.
*Talk about your Ex
Please don't ever do this! Mr.Darcy kept on talking about his last Fatal-Attraction kinda GF it made me so dizzy it felt like I was gonna go into a coma!
* Play with your cutlery/food
If you're on a Restaurant date, please don't play with your cutlery/food as if you're a 5yr old kid...and also don't use cutlery to make expressions while yakking, especially a knife cos this may look like you're Ted Bundy's re-incarnation!
*Touch your Crotch area
YUKK! If you ever do this in front of a girl like me, your Crotch will no longer exist.
*Keep looking at the watch/clock
Don't do this at all, cos it gives us women the impression that you have another Date to catch after this one.
*Talk with your face on her face
Please keep a decent physical distance when you're on your first few dates...after all this is not your Honeymoon!
*Keep texting/talking on your mobile phone
It's rude to chat on your mobile all the time when you're on a Date...it gives the impression that the Date isn't so important to you and that your work/mates/family is your real Date!
Don't go on blabbering about your interests only, as if this is a 'This Is Your Life' presentation for you. Do ask about her life and interests too.
*Ask too many questions
Do not keep asking loads of questions from the girl as if this is a Job Interview...do not make her sick from asking stupid questions such as 'how many babies do you want?'!
*Shake your legs like a manic motor!
I dislike guys who continuously rock their legs as if they are in a fit. Probably cancel the date and get some medical help?
*Say 'I Love You'
Please guys, a Date doesnt mean LOVE. Get over it! And save some lines to say when you really are in love (if that ever happens that is).
*Try to kiss the girl
I don't know about other girls, but I don't wanna get physical on the first few Dates. It'll take a very long time for a guy to get me to lock lips with him...so dragging me into bed will take, mmmm, like 7 lifetimes? Yeah dream on!
*Try to mate on a Date
For godssakes a first Date is not about Sleeping! *reminds me of wild Baboons' Mating season*. So don't even think about it without expecting to be beaten black and blue in public. *start getting used to Manolo Blahnik shoe marks on your face*
*Pay only for your meal/coffee
It's good to go 50/50 on a first Date, but it's always nice to offer to pay. Some guys may take you to McDonalds or Reject Shop Cafe - Girls BEWARE of such 'McMaggots'!
I dunno about other chicks, but I don't like guys who are pests/stalkers. Give it some time. After all Love and relationships are not supposed to show quick results like instant Maggie noodles!
Now add your points. Thanks guys!
Where do I begin...to tell the story of how 'great' a love can be...
Current Music: Love Story (Where Do I Begin) by Andy Williams