Viva forever...

Friday, January 11

Fading Into New

2007-Keshi: Hey me!

2008-Keshi: Hey you!

I was tagged by the gorgeous Silvara on a very interesting one this time around. This tag invites us to reveal what we would say to the person we were way back in the beginning of 2007. It goes like this. The Keshi who is right now at the beginning of year 2008, is talking to the Keshi who was at the beginning of year 2007. So it's like my Present self is having a little chat with my Past self. Neat or what guys! So here I go. Bear with me if I sound meaningless at some points, cos in here I am talking to myself and only I'd understand certain things :). Thanks in advance guys! Diving in now...

My dearest Kesh-in-2007,

Keshi Keshi Keshi it's 2007...what are you thinking about? That it's another year and how it'll all turn out to be? Well guess what, next year by this time you'd say that year 2007 was a cakewalk, but not without some very important reflections. You'd hear something great about your uncle's case which proves determination pays off somehow, but at the same time you'll fall out with a very close cousin. It's ok...cos from what she says to you, you'd realise that she's not what you thought she was to you. Some people wear thick masks Keshi...they are not as transparent as you are. Get over it and move on..I know you will by the end of 2007. At the same time, you'll learn to love them anyways...you'll become a freer person than you were in 2006. When 2008 comes around, you'd have a conscience as free as a bird soaring high in the sky. You'll realise that Conscience can either haunt you for life or set you free forever...and the latter it shall be for you.

Family-wise, you already know that sometimes loved-ones are the hardest people to get along with. The foolish games people play with each others' minds even at the cost of relationships are just mistakes that we all make. But towards the end of year 2007 you'd have put all those events behind you and look back with a smile...a smile for the person you have grown to be because of those experiences. Remember how you'd chuck a spaz up until 2006 when someone hurt your feelings Keshi? Well that was cos you were oversensitive and hadn't really learnt how to tackle your emotions sensibly. In 2007 you'll learn how to let go, how not to let people get to you and how to stay strong in character no matter what. 2007's events would make you fashionably sensitive but too cool to care, and that shall always be your spirit.

At times, you'd think life is such a drag...dark thoughts would take over you but light shall be found again...cos you are meant to live a little longer than just a few years on this Earth you know. There'll be few days in 2007 that you'd wanna end it all...yes you'd feel that low...but hey that's not Keshi right? Don't give in to such thoughts...certain events can either make you or break you...which one do you wanna choose for yourself? Have your heart broken but make sure you glue all the pieces back together (go to K-mart to get a good price on supa-glue hehe). Do not get discouraged by what your life has become...2008 will show you the direction to a better path. The map is being prepared right now. All you've got to do is keep driving along no matter what. And remember to follow road rules in this map of life - if you speed, you'd have to pay for it in many diffferent ways.

And oh dear, some friends who you thought were your real friends would also distance from you in 2007...you'd try your best but they simply aren't meant to be. Let go of the attachment and the longing, for that's when you'd see the true nature of any relationship. You'll make it, I know.

Healthwise you'll improve your fitness levels and you'll also be more determined. Not only physically, you'll also exercise your soul and keep it healthy and loving towards all beings. That'll truly make you who you were meant to be - you'll find you Keshi.

One more thing, you won't find love in 2007 honey, do not be disheartened...for who needs a partner when you have so many friends giving you a whole lot of love right here in Blogville every single day (when you long for some perving, just got to the beach!). You will have a certain Mr.Darcy falling for you in January but it'll all end in just 7 days - pretty short ha! He wasn't worth the drama anyways chica ***rolling eyes***. And you'll get over him pretty soon trust me. Well enjoy 2007 for you'd love it with all your heart when you reach 2008, and boy o boy it's gonna be one hell of a ride from now on!

-Your's sincerely Kesh-in-2008.

Ok have a rocking weekend guys! And a special note to my dearest Indian mates here...I LOVE YOU GUYS and I MEAN IT! No hard feelings between you and me ok. Differences don't make a friendship...similarities do. So let's focus on how 'similar' we are...you and I are human (not Indian, not Aussie, not Sri Lankan, not American)...just human, and we share one more thing between us and that's LOVE...and that's all that matters to me. Friends are like the waves and the shores...one can't exist without the other...and we keep reaching out to each other somehow. I heart my hot INDIAN mates, life would be dull without mah Bolly babies MWAHHHH! ;-) Catch ya all soon!

Current Music: Foolish Games by Jewel

Thursday, January 10

A Love Story...

Where do I begin

To tell the story of how great a love can be...

The sweet love story that is older than the sea...

The simple truth about the love he brings to me...

Where do I start

With his first hello

He gave new meaning to this empty world of mine...

There'll never be another love, another time...

He came into my life and made the living fine

He fills my heart.. .. ..

-- Love Story

I long for him with a passion cos he is the silhouette of my heart. When he comes to me I wrap my lips around his, and I taste every inch of him with a deep lust. The richness of his soul re-awakens my weary soul every single day. The more I have him, the more I want him. The more I see him, the more I want to see him. Without him, life would be bland and pointless. Without kissing him and relishing him, I would not be myself. Without him I'd die. He is the life in me and his spirit runs through my veins. He caresses my heart with so much love that no one else can give...he fills me with vigor and strength that no one else can replace...he makes love to me in ways that completes my very existence. Only he can make me truly happy cos he listens to me in silence, he never judges me, he takes me as I am and gives me more in return, his passion for me is the same as my passion is for him, he is always there for me and will never expect anything in return. And his name is eeffoC (written backwards). And we have a love affair that no one can steal. And I spilt him all over my bag today, @#$@#$$ dammmmit!

UPDATE: It seems that most of my Indian mates here have BOYCOTTED my blog. Not surprised or upset at all :). Thanks for showing your true colors!

Current Music: Theme from Love Story (piano solo) by Henry Mancini

Tuesday, January 8

Where True Victory Lives...

UPDATE: Please read my friend Vik's post here. I think he did a brilliant job (a much better job) on what I really wanted to convey through my Cricket post. Thanks Vik!

Alot of my Indian friends here weren't very happy about me congratulating the Aussie Cricket team in my last post. Too bad mates, I congratulate whoever who wins. To me, Cricket is simply a game that depends alot on circumstantial luck as well. Shit happens, one team wins, the other one loses...get over it! Anyways, my friend KP even blogged about the issue, addressed to me - read here. So I had to write this post in order to let you all know how I honestly feel about this cricket drama going on in Sydney at the moment, between Australia and India. I have lived in Australia for so long now I call Australia home. But that doesn't mean I blindly support Aussies in any given situation. At the same time, I haven't forgotten my roots. That also doesn't mean I blindly take Sri Lanka/India's side in any given situation. I'm a very fair person and as far as I know, I'm not judgement-impaired, neither am I a white-skin lover for the heck of it (I felt some friends in KP's post thought of me to be a white-skin lover - I really don't care what people think about me anyways, you are free to think whatever about me ok..I'm not bothered at all). I respect EVERY nation for it's QUALITY and ATTITUDE. Not just cos I was born there or have lived there longer and call it home. If Sri Lanka does a bad mistake, I'm not afraid to say it out loud (to be honest, I'm not very impressed about Sri Lankan politicians and the on-going war there anyways...so yeah, I say they are all totally screwed and seems like they love being screwed for years). The Attitude sucks. That's the whole problem behind the on-going conflicts. Anyways, I live in Aus so I know about Aussies much more than most of the Indian people who are screaming right now and calling Aussies racist etc etc. Actually Aussies are not as bad as you think they are. They are pretty friendly people...even alot less racist than some Indians/Sri Lankans are! Trust me when I say that.

Anyways, back to Cricket - Now I know that Indians are very passionate about Cricket as much as Aussies are. But throwing a massive hissy fit over something that's as simple as a match, wasn't very sporty of the Indian team. That's my opinion on this issue. The Indians are threatening to boycott the whole tour?? That's totally extreme. Ok let's say that the umpires were blind, the Aussie team was rude, Harbhajan Singh was racist etc etc. So both teams are at fault right? Now what's the big deal here? Why be so dramatic and drag the scene to eternity ? It's not a good habit. In Sports, many anger-related matters happen on the field and ofcourse some team wins and the other team has to lose. It takes alot of grace to accept defeat than to throw childish fits, that too at an International level. Aussies won...accept it and move on - it's as simple as that. Now if Aussies were a bad team (somehow I believe in their strength and determination, and that they are a TOP team) and if they were unsporty and unfair, and did not deserve to win, then I hope it all comes out in the open soon and that their victory be disqualified. But to throw away a whole tour while appealing for Harbhajan Singh's guilty racial-abuse verdict to be overturned is not a very mature act. If he gets cleared by his appeal, then that's fine, let it happen in due course, but why protest? That's childish. When the Aussie team was in Mumbai last Oct, there were crazy taunts by the Indian cricket fans that abused Symonds throughout all the matches. But I'm glad Aussies played on in India and that they did not throw a tanty or threaten to cancel the tour. That's what true sportsmanship is! Not suspending the whole tour and protesting, cos that's batty to the core. Back in Oct, neither did the Aussie fans turn extreme and abusive towards Indians, as much as Indians seem to be towards Aussies right now (I see alot of name-calling and racial slur against Aussies all over Blogville at the moment - that only proves no one is perfect). If you behave badly, then expect to get some in return. Also, I remember how the Indian cricket fans were trashing their own team when they couldn't get through to WC last time - it was horrible to see how Indians humiliated their own skin. I even told some bloggers that it's so extreme and stupid to embarass your own team just cos they LOST! Now, all of a suddden those same Indians who trashed their team are feeling so patriotic? So it's all about winning is it? :). Grow up people...it's only a game! If this is what the reaction is just for a game of Cricket, then I'm not surprised why there are so many wars in this world and why people are killing each other over trivial things. Extremism of any sorts should never be encouraged. Something wrong may have happened in this series...so let's rectify it and move on, instead of throwing tanties and bringing in racial debates. I was truly disappointed by some friends who brought in the Black/White debate into this. It's so very sad! Respect people for who they are...not for their skin color.

I love all my Indian friends here and I'm not taking Aussie or Indian's side. I believe both the teams are GREAT teams and GREAT to watch (hunk-wise too;-)). I'm just telling you exactly how I feel about this unwarranted drama over something that's supposed to be SPORTY and FUN. C'mon India, chuck the whingy attitude and play on! If Aussies were a bad team and did not deserve the victory, then get them in the next match and show them you don't give up easily and that you are as determined as hell. Sport is not only about winning the game, it's also about having a winning attitude. That's where true victory lives. Great cricketers never hold grudges. We don't want long faces, bring back the fun in Cricket!

And I LOVE AUSTRAAAALYA! I'm not black, I'm not white...I'm human. And I'm treated exactly that way in land Down Under.

Current Music: Down Under by Men At Work

Monday, January 7

Gimme, Gimme Your All...

What a refreshing return to Blogville with the success of the Aussie cricket team against India...woohoo CONGRATTS team! Hi guys...how's everyone? Yes I'm back in full form (like I promised) for 2008 starting today...so be prepared to listen to my bizzare stories for another 365 days (hopefully if I dun die)...LOL yes it's going to be a pain for you, I know I know. But during my break, I realised I can't live without you guys...OMG you all have become such a big part of me. MWAH I missed ya all! btw today is my first day at work after the hols and to tell you the truth, I feel so fresh and READY....ready for another load of C# work and professional blogging ahemm ;-). (these pics were taken this morning while getting ready for work ooh lala!). What say guys? A good long break with alot of loving, parties, trips, family and friends, joyful moments, magical pressies from sweet friends in far-away lands, some good ol' soul-cleansing shopping, good food and alot of sleep make one feel fresh for sure right? Well, I feel good...do you? I hope this is going to be a fantastic year for all of us here and the whole world. I hope people see this as a fresh start and spread love instead of hatred (I'm sick of seeing bloodshed on TV). It's never too late you know...change can happen, if you let it happen. So open your hearts, scratch the surface and find LOVE this year.

While I was on hols, alot of great things as well as shitty things happened. One of the best things was finding a 'Merry Christmas' wish on my answering machine at 1am on Christmas Day all the way from Sri Lanka...guess who it was from...guess guess guess :). It was from G...a very dear ex-BF. He's a sweet one...not a nasty guy...a lovely, caring soul. It came as a big surprise cos I have lost touch with him for a while now. So yeah, that really made me smile. The shittiest thing that happened was at the mall, last Thursday...I was looking for a Parking spot, and as usual it was packed with people shopping like shopping-whores! I was going around and around for almost an hour, when a very kind girl indicated to me that she was leaving and that I could take her spot. So I thanked her and drove close to where she had parked. As she left, I drove in to the spot, parked and was getting out of my car when some monkey-in-a-driving-seat came crashing on Reverse very close to the front of my car! I was startled thinking that he had hit my car and guess what...my car narrowly escaped this loser's van, and the Holden commodore parked next to me got hit by his van, and the bumper fell off! I was so furious, and was wondering WTF he was doing! He stopped in front of me and asked me to take my car from the spot cos apparently he was waiting for that spot! HUH!!!?? Mr.Fucker where did that come from? I was so shocked at his stupidity, I asked him what made him think so. He goes yadda yadda yadda (his English I could hardly u'stand), and I was so bored with his rant, and after a long argument I told him this 'If you're so desperate for this spot, I'll give it to you mate...but do me a favor...report the damage you did to that other car, would you?'...he said he will but I doubted it. Imagine how upset the other car owner would be when he/she returns and sees the damage to their car, not knowing who'd done it? Besides, this loser had 3 kids at the back and he was behaving like a moron. I pity those kids...they'll never grow up to be men who respect women, especially men who'd just let go of a frikkin Parking spot, and that too a spot that didn't belong to them! Anyways, I was sick of his yelling, I muttered all the possible F-words as I left the spot and luckily found another spot immediately. But I wrote down his plate number and the damaged car's plate number and reported it to the Mall security. They thanked me for reporting him in and went to the scene straight away...and guess what...I got 3 free coffee vouchers for reporting this incident :), cos now the damaged-car's owner knows who's responsible for it and can claim it from him. So yeah that's my first good deed for the year 2008 :). If you see someone behaving recklessly and irresponsibly, REPORT them to the authorities...don't be afraid. That's the least you could do to prevent people from doing such things again to another person.

Anyways, I hope you all had a safe and happy break. I believe good and bad things happen to us for a reason...for a good reason eventually. Something good comes out of everything that happens to us. Ok catch up with all your blogs soon! And I'll update my trip and shopping details later with pics. btw it's just awesome to be back with all of you, and you guys keep me coming back to Blogville cos it's an AMAZING place - cos of YOU! And I love this new song by Britney -it's sizzling hot (wanna pole-dance for this song some day hehehe). Now, gimme gimme more...more of YOU, like I give you my all...

;-).

Current Music: Gimme More by Britney Spears

Thursday, January 3

Margie Magic!

Whoaaaa!

How does it look guys?

hmmmm?

Bole chudiyan...bole kangana!

It's making my heart smile...

This beautiful purple and green bracelet was sent to me all the way from Colorado by a beautiful heart - a very generous Santi Claus who lives in the US. Her name is Margie and OMG she's such a sweetheart! I was stoked to bits when I unwrapped the beautiful Xmas wrapping to find this gorgeous bracelet inside. I was so in awe of it that I had to wear it straight away and take these pics to show the whole world how much I love it and the person who sent it! I had just come home from a trip with a friend and dropping her off at the railway station (hence the messy hair and ugly sweaty face aha! ;-)) and was so overjoyed to see this in my mailbox. It was a beautiful surprise after a tiring and shitty day (I'll tell you what happened in another post...long story!). So this was a very sweet thing that happened to me after that upsetting incident earlier in the day. I have never received a gift in the mail from a net friend...this was the first time and it's such a magical feeling that I simply cant express in words. Margie my dear, THANK YOU so very much! You have no idea how HAPPY your very kind and loving act made me feel, I'm wearing it now and I am dancing hehehehe. Well anyways, you didn't have to send me anything cos I already know you truly love and care about me. It's a kind of magic that our hearts know and share, and it will live in my heart til the day I die. Love ya my friend, HUGGGGGGGGGZ and MWAHHHHHHHZ and THANKS again!

I just had to update you all with this exciting news today itself...so yeah :). My New Year's post is just below this post...read it if you haven't read it already. All my friends here give me life. So this song is especially for Margie and all you lovely people here who keep me alive. This is one of my fav Hindi numbers. Thanks guys and catch ya all soon!

Bole chudiyan, bole kangna

My bangles say, my bracelets say

Haai main ho gayi teri saajna

I have become yours, sweetheart

Tere bin jiyo naiyo lag da main te margaiya

Without you I wouldn't have life, I would die... ... ...

Current Music: Bole Chudiyan from the Hindi movie Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham

Tuesday, January 1

2000 and 7 Memories!

A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL MY DEAREST FRIENDS HERE!

Hey guys...how's it going? I'm still on my holidays...will be back for regular blogging on the 7th of Jan. Until then, I'm sharing with you some of my Christmas pics from family dinners, lunches, Xmas lights and some cosy moments with my cousins and their kiddies. I hope you all had a great Christmas break and a wonderful New Year's eve. Thank you so very much for dropping by when I wasn't around and leaving heartfelt messages for me. MWAH I love and miss you all! Can't wait to get back to Blogville. I have also been going on little trips, some long drives and to beaches and BBQs. Some scenic pics will follow later on. For now, enjoy these Christmas pics (click on pic to read captions). Man I'm food-drunk and have put on weight! :( I intend to get back to my regular exercises and walking asap...til then I'll roam around like a wobbly lil product of rich festive food, jeez!

Now, as we usher a brandnew year in, we must remember the challenges we faced in 2007, all the memories made and the lessons learnt. My most memorable lesson from the year 2007 took place when a few harsh words from a loved-one that hurt me alot (for days), somehow made me the strongest that I have ever been. Not cos I've become numb, but because I have become free...free from depending on what others say/think who I am. What only matters to me right now is what I think who I am. Cos I'm my own person and in the end, I'm the only one I have to answer to. Share with me your most memorable lesson from year 2007 (if you have one).

The song playing right now is my fav from year 2007 from a great Aussie band, and I dedicate it to the memories of year 2007. God bless you all for a wonderful, happy and safe 2008, have a blast guys and see ya soon...MISS YA MADLY!

.. .. ..
Wake me up low with a fever
Walking in a straight line
Set me on fire in the evening
Everything will be fine
Waking up strong in the morning
Walking in a straight line
Lately I’m a desperate believer
But walking in a straight line.. .. ..

Current Music: Straight Lines by Silverchair

Friday, December 21

Merri Merri Keshimaschhh!

Heyy Guys! In the past few days I have been so very busy at work...absolutely hectic! No time to blog at all ***sobs heavily, blows her nose, sobs heavily again***, hence the unexpected irregularity of my omnipresence in Blogville ***looks down at her rusting bloggadallic wings***. And now that it's nearly Christmas, it's time for me to go on that much-deserved end-of-the-year sabbatical as well. I'm sure many of you will be on holidays as well, right? It's time to be merry and it's time to chillax with your loved-ones and fill your hearts with love and light. I love the spirit of Christmas (sans the commercialism of it all) cos somehow it makes my heart swell with LOVE (not that it aint there on other days)...but Christmas makes it even more special...it adds to the beauty and bliss of Love and Life. And at Christmas time, the joy of giving is universally celebrated, spreading the warmth of it all through every gift that's given...be it for your loved-one or for a total stranger in need. Gifts arent always tangible...the greatest and the most precious gifts usually come in intangible forms. To express what those intangible gifts can be, I came up with this little recipe for a meaningful Christmas that you may like to read (trust me I'm working hard on this myself :)). This was written by me using my own experiences in life. So here it is:

Eat the food of Bliss

...for that's the healthiest one

Drink the wine of Joy

...for that's the sweetest one

Decorate the tree of Life

...for that's the gifted one

Wear the clothes of Smiles

...for that's the prettiest one

Hear the music of Grace

...for that's the coolest one

Do the dance of Peace

...for that's the happiest one

Sing the song of Truth

...for that's the neatest one

Give the gift of Love

...for that's the truest one.

With that, I wanna wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a great, fun-filled brandnew year! You guys have been my rock over the year 2007 and I THANK YOU all for being here for me always! I'll be taking about 10 days off starting this afternoon. During the break I'll be going to a few parties here and there, and hopefully I'd get some quality time to destress as well (without having to replace my brain that is!). I still haven't done my shopping o nos Im fretting to bits! ***feels electrocuted beyond recognition***. I will still be online on and off, whenever I get time, but it won't be as regular until after the holiday season. Anyways,

My Christmas message to myself and all...May we never forget the less-fortunates, the war-stricken, the sick and the old, the dying, the soldiers, the babies in ICU, the hungry, the neglected, the poor, the disabled, the lonely, the depressed, the abused, the lost, the living and the dead...may we always remember.

As one last question for the year 2007. I wanna ask you this: What was the KINDEST thing you did in the year 2007? Ok, mine would be when I sent a load of money (when I couldnt really afford to) to my uncle when everyone backed off during his hardest time in March this year...and I will never ask him for that money in this life (or in another life), neither will I remind him of that favor ever again. That's my kindest act for year 2007 and I'm so glad I don't have stingy genes . Now what was your kindest act for this year? :)

OK folks, I hope you all have a good break. Drive carefully, be safe, be good and enjoy the fun times with family and friends! And don't forget the real meaning behind this season. I'm gonna miss ya all til I'm here next time, MWAHHHHHZ, take care now and see yous in 2000 and bloody 8! ***winks***

Current Music: Happy Christmas (war is over) by John Lennon

Wednesday, December 19

It's In Your Deeds

A British schoolteacher has been arrested in Sudan accused of insulting Islam's Prophet, after she allowed her pupils to name a teddy bear 'Muhammad'... ...it is seen as an insult to Islam to attempt to make an image of the Prophet Muhammad... ...angry crowds have demanded the death penalty for a Sudanese newspaper editor over an article allegedly questioning the parentage of the Prophet Muhammad. Read here.

Question: Faith or Ignorance, for where is Forgiveness?

A 16-year-old Mississauga girl who was allegedly strangled by her father in a dispute over her refusal to wear the hijab has died... ...“She wanted to live her life the way she wanted to, not the way her parents wanted her to,”... ...She calls it a fallacy to think that wearing a piece of fabric makes a girl more spiritual, when what she does is more important than what she wears on her head. Read here.

Question: Faith or Manipulation, for where is Freedom?

A YOUNG Asian woman was murdered for bringing disgrace on her family, after they heard a love song had been dedicated to her on a radio station, cops said yesterday... ...Heshu Yones, 16, from Acton, West London, was stabbed 11 times by her dad before he slit her throat... ...her Kurdish Muslim father, jailed for life for murder in 2002, said he had to kill her because she formed a relationship with a Lebanese Christian. Read here.

Question: Faith or Discrimination, for where is Unity?

LONDON - A father who ordered his daughter brutally slain for falling in love with the wrong man - a man who didn’t come from their Iraqi village, in a so-called “honor killing” was found guilty of murder... ...Banaz Mahmod, 20, was strangled with a boot lace, stuffed into a suitcase and buried in a back garden. Read here.

Question: Faith or Barbarism, for where is Love?

Is there a God who rewards you when you imprison another with your beliefs? Is there a God who sees differences between a Christian and a Muslim, or a Hindu and a Buddhist? Is there a God who tells you to kill His children just cos they want to live life the way they prefer? Is there a God who applauds you for taking away someone else's right to live? Is there a God who tells you that you are his great devotee if you hurt another? Is there a God who teaches you to dominate women and crush their freedom and dreams? Is there a God who worries about what you wear rather than what you do? Is there a God who blesses you when you strangle a child with your bare hands? Is there a God who doesn't recognise love? Is there a God who promotes hatred and violence? Is there a God who instructs you that killing is honorable? What's so moral about throttling another with your beliefs? What's so Honorable about Killing? To me it is the LOWEST act a human being could ever do to another! Tell me, is there such a God? Is this what your faith is? Does that God know about forgiveness, acceptance, love and humanity? Doesn't He sometimes cry, feel, want, need...love? What/who is your religion/faith/God? I follow the religion of 'Live and let live'. I pray, not through words but through my deeds...for the God I know manifests through my deeds.

Current Music: Pray by Tina Cousins

Friday, December 14

Bloke Talk

Ok my office guys were really sweet, 10 of them (all Aussies), and just 2 chicks (myself and one other Aussie girl). The night-out was fantastic! A little bit of Vodka and great mates, made me feel relaxed and happy. And you too...for all the kind words you left for me in the last post...they REALLY helped. And Darsh thanks tons for your caring txt msgs! You have no idea how awesome I feel every morning reading all your comments here...it feels like the fairies have visited me overnight and left gold-dustish trails for me to revel in. Thank you so much for being in my life, you guys just rock!

Few friends here wanted to know how the Drinks went - the details and all. Well, we met up with some ex-workmates of our company as well...so I got to meet some guys whom I haven't seen in yonks. That was the highlight of the evening. There used to be an Irish guy who worked with us who left our company few years ago...he came along as well and I was really thrilled to see him. Cos I really like this guy...he's so very funny, every word he speaks makes you wanna ROFL, and he's a very smart guy too. There was another ex-workmate who I used to be in love with (one-sided love alert!). He has the most amazing blue eyes I have ever seen! He came along too and I was just jaw-dropped all night long, my tongue wagging that way and drooling heavily, and then I got so annoyed with myself etc etc Keshi o behave! So we all chatted and laughed and caught up with each others' lives. The only other chick who was present was also an ex-workmate and she told us that she recently got married...in Hawaii too, now that's just WAAAWW isnt it! She then asked about my love life and I was speechless for a while and then I just laughed. Anyways guess what the first topic one smart dude started on...guess? guess? Well it was about ex-partners. I was like 'you mofo you had to bring that up' in my head. He started telling us about a recent incident where he ran into his ex and wanted to dig a hole and disappear (he must have done evil things to her oooo!). I swear I didn't mention my story to anyone and I was wondering where this topic was coming from hmmmm. Tys I was thinking of your comment just then...:). Anyways, I kept quiet and then the topic changed to recent Aus politics, and then to work, old bosses, Xmas, IBM, office gos etc etc. Anyways, thank God the Bon-Jovi lookalike didn't turn up cos if he did, I'd have passed out without even having to drink! btw I didn't drink past 2 glasses of Vodka..that's me. I don't like to drink alot, neither can I take in alot. Tipsy runs naturally in my blood you see (no surprises there!). All in all the night was just so refreshing, I had a very good time.

Now there is this single guy in my office (recently turned single cos he went through a divorce last year after a brief marriage), who seems to like me alot. He too came along last night. I know he's a good mate but he tends to pass hints at me...hints that suggest he likes me alot and hints that seem to indirectly ask if there's any chance of a date with him on my radar **rolling eyes**. I quite conveniently play dumb with his hints hehe, not to hurt him or not cos I don't like him, but simply cos we work together and I don't wanna date someone from work. I'm not the office-flirt kinda girl. Also, it'll mess up alot of things and worse, I don't wanna go home tell my mum I'm seeing a divorced guy...she'll faint and never really recover LOL! Don't get me wrong, my mum is a very broad-minded woman...she doesn't judge people based on failed relationships. Actually it's not even my mum, I think it's me. I think I've become a closed personality when it comes to love. And I have a subtle fear of divorced men...don't anyone have that fear initially? I mean, especially if you have never been married before, you do tend to think that someone who got a divorce would be alot harder to push yourself to start dating. Am I wrong? I don't know...there's this psychological barrier that sort of stops you from thinking about someone who's got a recent divorce, as a potential partner. It makes you wonder about all the WHYs of the divorce and whether he's being honest with what he's saying etc. But that doesn't mean he's a bad a guy, no ways...this dude is a genius in our office, and is a very sweet and decent bloke and a wonderful friend. I used to know his ex-wife too...she used to come around for office drinks/parties. They are both very sweet people, so I don't understand why they broke up, but what he told me was that she got bored with him. Just like that? hmmm...do people get divorced just cos they get bored with each other? LOL sounds funny doesn't it? I don't judge anyone from their past relationships either, but a divorce does worry me a bit...not that I don't make mistakes myself but there's something that stops me from forgetting that he just got a divorce...WHY or WHY! It probably isn't even him. It may be cos I'm so used to being single now running around wild and cooking in my knickers...maybe I don't wanna date anyone anymore...I really don't know! So amidst vague romantic signalling from him, Keshi refuses to give him the green light. She's at an eternal red, cos she thinks why start something that doesn't bring out the 'right' feelings in her...atleast not yet. Am I a narrow-minded cow? Am I a selfish 'spoilt princess' of this modern era? Am I really being a wuss here? Am I a total jerkette? Am I a completely lost and confused bimbo? You tell me. Be honest ok!

And yeah, since he lives closer to me and we are on the same train line, when I was getting ready to go home after Drinks, he very politely asked me if I'd like to have some company on the way back home. I said no probs at all cos he's a decent guy, and he didn't have more than 3 drinks so it was safe to have him around - he could be my bodyguard too hehe. And as I was saying my goodbyes to everyone, he put his right arm gently around my shoulder and told his other mate, we are getting married you know. HUH I didnt know that jebus! :) He said that just for fun, I know. But I think that was also another hint...another one of those indirect messages. Am I a cold-hearted bitch who don't give a good guy a chance? Is that why I'm eternally looking for love? Am I so used to being that single diva for so long that I ignore love-signals by my own choice? Am I looking for something that don't exist? Am I gonna end up as a wrinkly old saggy-boobed 109yr old still-single granma still trying to fit into Victoria's Secret goodies that no one wiill ever see? Or am I just desperate for some loving? You tell me.

Have a good one guys!

Current Music: Boys In Town by Divinyls

Wednesday, December 12

A Long Distance Call

Last Saturday I ran into 'someone'...someone I didn't wish to meet again...someone I never thought would stir a single feeling in me again...that when his eyes met mine that I'd just carelessly walk away...that I'd never have an inch in my body that cared for him...but every memory we made came back crashing down on me to haunt me for a while...the tender kisses, the warm hugs, the touch of his fingers on my back...his voice...his lips...his once much-desired presence in my life. Our eyes met...I saw a far away affection in his eyes yet a need to be distant from the woman he had just seen...he looked away as if he'd just seen someone who'd disturb his now happy life...I looked away thinking who knew...who knew that we'd end up being so distant and cold. Somehow I knew that I wished him well always. What our eyes just perceived spoke volumes to our hearts...our hearts then made a long distance call...a call to the times when we were so in love and when nothing else mattered. That time now seems thousands of miles away..so far away.

Guys, I'm going out for drinks with the boys tonight...my office colleagues. I need some good loving male company for a change, what say? Don't worry I'm ok. Have a good day yous!

Current Music: It Must Have Been Love by Roxette

Monday, December 10

True Humanity

A German shepherd, named Carts after a Police Constable who was murdered in 1997, was stabbed several times while on a call-out to a surf club at Corrimal in the weekend (these 2 pics are of Carts). Read here. This heroic police dog was on duty and was chasing a suspect when he was stabbed by the suspect himself. My tears wouldn't stop as I saw this on the news. What kind of loser hurts an animal? Carts the police dog was doing his duty and he died a hero, whereas the criminal is now double the criminal he was. Seven-year-old Carts, which joined the force in 2002, later died of injuries in a veterinary hospital. Carts was trained to track criminals, to protect the community and aid the Police in keeping the community crime-free. This is a story of true valor and about a dog that gave his life to fighting crime. Carts died a hero whereas the man who he was chasing just before Carts was stabbed, will remain a loser all his life. There's a big difference bewteen some animals and humanbeings. Sometimes animals are much more human than some humanbeings. Carts set an example for all of us...he did what he was trained to do, with no complaints or fears. He was doing the right thing and he was never afraid to even die doing the best he could as service to man. Long live Cart's beautiful memory and true valor!

Carts reminded me of several German Shepherds we used to own before my dad died. Since my dad was also a Police officer, he was an avid dog-lover. The last German Shepherd we had was Ginger (this is not a pic of Ginger but he looked exactly like this and used to sleep like this too - I have pics of Ginger that I need to scan). Ginger was a big black cuddly dog who loved to run around crazily and get tired for no reason. Then he used to crawl under the bed and bark playfully. We used to take him for walks and to play with other dogs, and my dad used to put him in his car and drive around. Ginger sat quietly in the front seat and was a very obedient and well-mannered passenger. Ginger had better qualities than some humanbeings. Ginger taught me how to be patient and stay quiet when you don't get what you want...Ginger taught me how to obey....Ginger taught me how to just be happy for no reason....Ginger taught me how to show affection unconditionally...Ginger taught me what it is to greet someone everyday from the heart...Ginger taught us that it's great to be honest all the time...Ginger taught me how to appreciate...Ginger showed me how to love and LIVE every single day like it's my last. I remember Ginger oh so fondly...he was one of a kind. And I remember my sister and I cried for months when Ginger died. I remember we held a candle-lit vigil on the day he was buried. I remember Ginger, and I learnt so much from him than I ever did from some humans...Ginger was more human than some humanbeings.

In a world full of terror, pain and fear, I still pray...cos even though some humans are like animals, I still believe in humanity cos of some animals like Carts and Ginger.

Current Music: I Still Pray by Kasey Chambers

Thursday, December 6

Naughty Or Nice

Ok I may be upside down in this pic but hey that's cos I'm rolling inside a mailbox on the way to Santa! Here's a question for ya. Since it's Christmas time and all, it's definitely the time to write a letter to Santa - what say? So the question is:

If you could ask for anything from Mr.Claus this year, what would it be and why?

Now put your thinking caps on and answer with nothing but honesty. Write a letter if you must, as your comment. After your comment, you'll get a reply from Santa and he'll say if you've been naughty or nice! Hey join in the fun now and see what Santa is gonna say to ya. Don't say you don't believe in Santa etc etc. ***Keshi blocks her ears and goes 'lalalalalala'***. Jeeeez don't you know how to have some fun! Now dive in sweeties and please be true to your hearts with your answers. THANKS guys!

Today's song is a dedication to myself...I need a holiday in paradise and someone to go with me. That's my genuine wish this Christmas (I'll post my entire list later on). Santa please be kind to me atleast this December! You have been a bloody rude fat beardy bastard so far! Put your beer down and read my goddamn letter this time. HO HO HO...you are!

Current Music: Two Tickets To Paradise by Eddie Money

Wednesday, December 5

Just Shoot Me!

Have you ever come across people running really low on cranium? I mean people who hold a much higher Dumbness factor than yourself? I meet such people on a daily basis. It has happened too many times I feel I'm the most intelligent being on Earth! ;-) ok jokes apart, what do you do with such severely cranium-deficient people? I have no idea myself but most of the time I seem to handle them in a way that don't cause post-traumatic stress to me (maybe I'm immune to it by now). But I die a sudden and brief death from such dorky run-ins that leave scars somehow. Now here are some moronic encounters with some Moronicas from Keshi's diary:

A No-Frills Brain

**One day I was shopping in a Myer store and I suddenly meet a specimen of my immediate-wrath-about-to-ignite. He's a friend's friend and we have met before. He goes 'I think I know you...do you know me?'. ***Keshi is about to pass out due to severe trauma that was caused by that sentence***. OK I may know you but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't know me anymore even if you knew me before, cos right now it seems like you walked out of a Buy-one-get-one-free Psycho Conditions store...it's that massive mate! I didn't really say that to him but in my head I was so disturbed by that question I wanted to throw up! Do people really ask that kinda question, I think I know you...do you know me? What does he think I'm - that I just stepped out of a mental goodies warehouse like he seems to have!

A Brain-In-Training
**Another day I was cooking at home, and my cousin (not really dumb but can be dumb at times) walks in to the kitchen and switches off the stove. HUH? Did I even witness that? Worse, I kept on cooking! 2 seconds later, my brain told me about what he had just done. So I turn to him and ask 'Why did you switch it off when I'm still cooking?'. He goes 'Cos we are going out tonite'. Wow my dear brother, so we are going out tonight which is still some hours away, and I have to leave the chicken half-cooked on the stove-top, just like how your brain is half-functioning right now? I don't think so Timmy! Cmon add your brain into the cooking..it needs some defrosting for all I know!

Powerful Brain Repellent
**I have a friend who is an Internet user but don't know much about computers...to be precise, she doesn't know about computer Viruses etc. No probs there, cos alot of people don't know much techie stuff unless they work in the IT industry. But a terrifying discovery took place when she asked me this bizzare question one day. 'Keshi I want to protect my PC from viruses...what do I have to do...should I spray disinfectants on it?'. OK that's enough my friend...plug it off and take it back to the vendor please. That way the PC will remain sane too! Cos my brain died a violent psychotic death for a minute or 2, right after that question from her!

A Brain Ride
**One night I was just sitting on the couch sipping coffee, thinking how beautiful life is. Not for too long, cos 5mins later I got a deadly phone call that sent me on a shock spiral staircase! A friend of mine rang me to find out what the time was! WTF?? Where was she ringing from - from Mars? I mean cmon, did she have to ring me to find out the time provided she was still on this planet? Worse she was ringing from her mobile phone which probably has a clock ***rolling eyes and it wont stop***. No she wasnt trashed or on drugs, neither was she coming back to life after a deep coma or from a scene from the movie Castaway. However, I'd like to believe that she probably was in the middle of a brain transplant!

Brain Drain
**My mum's bday is on the 28th of June. All her friends know it and have been wishing her every year on her bday. Let's call my mum J. One Sunday in March this year, we went out to a party and came home to find a message on the Answering machine. It was from one of her closest friends R. I put it on speaker and it went like this: 'Hey J it's R here. HAPPY BIRTHDAY sweetie!'. I felt like I was listening to that message while being electrocuted! This must be my rebirth cos I didn't know my mum's bday was in March!! Or is this our house that I'm checking messages from? I looked to see if it's the correct house...yes that's our dining table, that's my photo - yes it was our house AMEN! So it was my friend's mum who was probably going low on her brain's battery power...not me!

Brain Killers
**One day I was walking down the street and I see this young guy trying to take a new couch into his house. The couch is wider than his main door, but who asked him to take it in horizontally? I saw him standing there, staring at the door like he was wishing the door was wider awww. How about trying to take it in vertically brother? If that thought don't get developed by your grey matter, then throw a bomb and break the door so it would be wider? Even better, buy a new house with a wider door cos you'd feel smater then. And that way I don't have to die a slow and painful death watching you either!

Brain Brain Go Away!
**Have you noticed some people wearing sunnies at night/indoors? Sunnies hello! Have you noticed some people getting out of the train just when the train doors are closing? Do they have a deep sexual fantasy for getting caught between the doors and suffocating - asphyxiation anyone? Have you noticed some people walking down the street not allowing anyone else to share the road? Do they think the road is their bathroom? Have you noticed some people talk/laugh so loud in a hospital with no concern for patients? I think they are the real patients. A cranium-refill is in order. And witnessing such people has already attained me Nirvana...Loka Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu (May all the beings in all the worlds be happy), amen!

Share with me some super-dumb encounters in your life.

Current Music: I Want To Break Free by Queen

Monday, December 3

The Wuthering Heights

I went to the beach and later on some of my friends went Fishing, so I joined them. Here are some pics both from the beach as well as the Fishing trip. First few pics are from the beach and the rest are from the Fishing trip. The roses are from my cousin's driveway.

Watching the waves, listening to the water, walking barefeet on warm white sand...that's all I need to escape from routine life. The fishing spot was also very beautiful....with shallow waters and fresh green shrubs. It was magically soothing to the body and mind. When I observe nature closely, I realise how very similar it is to people and the lives we live. (that inspired the captions of the slide-show pics btw). Nothing is permanent in life...just like how the fish that had it's lives changed in a second by my friends who were fishing, just like how the green shrubs were left all alone when the tide got low and the water disappeared (compare last 2 pics of the same spot, one with and the other without water), nothing is forever. Bonds, changes, separations, losses, reconciliations, storms, resurrections...they all make life what it is. And just like how nature remains content no matter what, humans also have an inherent quality of survival in them that makes them withstand the harshest conditions of life. Life must go on no matter what...cos we are part of nature...just like the trees, water, fish, stones, birds and the sands...we are nature.

We are made to flow like a river, cutting through it's rocky barriers, yearning to reach the final destination somehow...we are made to fly like a bird, soaring up in the skies and reaching the stars...we are made to swim like little fishes, taking each new day as it comes, be it the last day on Earth or not. When we steam in anger like hot water, when we calm down like snow, when we smile like the sun, when we shine like the moon and the stars, when we fall like how even some strong rocks fall, when we bloom like the flowers, when we wither in Winter, when we whistle like the breeze, when we kiss like the waves kiss the sands, when we wanna hold hands like the shrubs do with the shallow waters, it's only natural and that nature in us lives forever. And it's only native for us to endure the storms of life...and naturally, there's always sunshine after rain. So hang in there, through whatever the rough waves you may be riding right now. For the nature in you, will find you the shore somehow...I'm standing alone in this stormy weather, but I know that the nature in me will somehow hold me strong in these wuthering heights.

UPDATE: Just now, as I was about to publish this post, I got a call from my cousin D in NZ. My uncle who was going through a real hard time for the last 6yrs (the one who you all prayed for in my March post A Day Of Reckoning), finally got his miracle! This was his final hurdle. I can't believe I got the news as I was typing this very post...it's just amazing! I'm so happy guys and thanks so much for praying for him, it worked! This is just unbelievable! Nobody thought he'd come out of the hell he was in...finally he did! And I'm so glad me and my cousin D never gave up on him and did everything we could to help him til the last minute, when everyone else gave up on him...and we somehow won! That's what I'm trying to say through this post too...hang in there, don't give up, your time will come too! I'm dancing and crying now, for my uncle :*). Finally God looked his way! And that is enough for me to believe He is there. Cos even my uncle's lawyer said that this is a miracle. (this pic with him was taken when I was in Auckland last year).

This song always makes me hold on, and I'm lucky I saw REM perform this song LIVE in Sydney few years ago. Omg I still can't believe I got that call when I was about to publish this post! Hence I dedicate this post to my uncle's true courage and strength, that somehow prevailed when the whole world laughed at him...when his own brothers and sisters mocked him...when he asked for help and did not get any in return...when the very people he trusted did not believe in him. He somehow survived those wuthering heights...cos he believed in himself.

Current Music: Everybody Hurts by REM