Thursday, November 22

Weddings And Marriages

One of my closest friends in Blogville is getting married this weekend WOOHOO! She's none other than the ever-elegant, loving and beautiful Silvara! She's an Indian Aussie living in Melbourne (closet-nympho like me) and she's getting married to her Sri Lankan Aussie sweetheart Evs (Craig-David lookalike btw ***wolf whistles***. Blogville is the only place I can wolf-whistle cos I cant whistle like that in real haha!). Silvara dahlin, this is a brandnew beginning for ya babez...I know you've been through hell of alot, but everything will be alright now - trust in that ok. I wanna wish this beautiful couple all the very best for their future - may their love keep them warm and blessed for many years to come!


Silvara's wedding is proof to one of her closest dreams taking shape. We all have dreams but only few of them truly take shape in life. And when a dream comes true, we must celebrate it to the max. As a little girl, I dreamt of getting married too...some day to a Prince Charming, me wearing a white gown and a beautiful lacy veil, him looking at me longingly. ***Shock bell rings***. Yeah right, wake up Keshi! That teenagerish dream kind of died when I started meeting men LOL! It was like they were not Prince Charming, rather Prince Harming. So a wedding was out of the question for me, let alone a marriage! Ok I know there are great men out there too (I can hear all the yadda yadda yadda at the back) and that alot of women find their soulmates etc etc BUT - 'but' is a very BIG word you see :). So yeah, BUT, not every woman finds her soulmate as Silvara did (they have been in love for years and they have all the elements to prove it). Some women settle for any man just so that they own the 'married' tag. Now why am I saying this? Cos the following happened 2 nights ago:


I was talking on the phone to my fav cousin who lives overseas. We both grew up together since we were babies. We were just inseparable and we still are. We used to play, celebrate bdays together, knock on doors and hide, get in trouble, we even had dorky crushes at the same time in our lives, did sneaky things together behind our parents' backs etc etc. So you can imagine how close we are. She got married very very young. So when I was on the phone with her on a long happy chat, she said something that somehow upset me, though I didn't tell her that straight away. We were talking about another girl we used to know (she got married recently to a boy that her family didn't approve of), and suddenly my cuz said something like this: 'Atleast she's married'. I somehow didn't like that statement. What does that mean? Atleast she's married so she has a better status in life than a single woman like me does? So, I lack something major in my life? I somehow felt that's what she intended by that line - cos you know my instincts told me so. Now I know my cuz very well...she's married to someone she loved at the time, but her family didn't approve of it either. Now her relationship with him is not so great. Although they live peacefully at the moment, they really don't have a relationship. She even admitted to it...she told me that they are like flatmates and that's about it. And another cousin of mine who's got 2 young kids is on the verge of separation from his wife. And a close young friend of mine has a violent husband (the one I blogged about in the DV post). Another friend has a husband who don't even talk to her - they just exist under the same roof, that's what their marriage is all about! And another close friend got married recently, and his wife has already left him and gone back to India for good. Whoaa looks like I come from the Guiness Book's Divorce Community LOL! So has 'being married' helped her or the others I mentioned here to have a BETTER life than of a single person? I don't think so. I'm not laughing at her or demeaning her marriage or anyone else's, but I'm laying out straight facts on the table. We don't need to hide the thorns and make it sound like it's paradise when it's not. Marriage isn't a total fairytale either, it's hard work I agree, but if the marriage certificate is the only thing alive about it, then it's no use either. Marriage can only be real when there is true love, respect and understanding between the partners, like how Silvara and Evs, and some other friends here in my blog have it. Otherwise we don't need to be married...if you don't have those elements in your relationship, spare us all from the agony and please stay single people! That's what I'm doing btw :).


All in all, I got offended by what she said, no matter what. Now why did I get offended? Not cos what she said was true, but it made me feel sad that even my closest loved-ones look at me through the eyes of traditional beliefs and using senseless measures such as a man is a MUST in a girl's life for her to be valued. If she didn't mean it that way, then why did she say it? It somehow made me feel that she's hinting at me that being single is ridiculous or it means that something's wrong with me...and that being married (even if it's a bad marriage), is better than being single. I didn't say anything to her at that moment but just today I wanted to tell her how I felt about that statement of her's. You guys know that nothing can stop me from speaking my heart out, so I just had to do that or else I'd have gone mental thinking about it ***rolling eyes***. I wanted to let her know how I felt too. So I txted her. This is what I wrote


hey I was wondering about what you said last night about being married - the line 'atleast she's married'. Maybe you meant that for me too cos I'm still single? Here's my point...I don't think one has to be married to be successful in life. If marriage is so 'necessary' in life I can just go and get married to any guy out there. Life isn't all about finding just anyone to settle with. And look at our own family's marriages...are they all happy? I guess I'd rather be single all my life than be with the wrong man. Marriage must come with love, respect and understanding...not just cos I wanna be married. So if the right man don't come around, I'd be quite happy to remain single and independant. Just thought about it this morning...that's all. TC n HUGS!


I felt good telling her how I felt. Cos she just had to know. She then rang me later on and said that she didn't mean anything like that. So maybe she said that cos she doesn't know what marriage really is? I don't know, some people use words without thinking how they would affect the other person. Or maybe I'm just mad! o well Man or not, some day I plan to don the white dress and take some photos cos I'd just love to dress up as a bride. :) Actually, cos I'm such a big mushpot I better not have a wedding..cos if I did, I'd fill it with all the rosy romantic songs, colors and dances that the guests would be throttled with too much sook and would really wanna leave before lunch! BEWARE of a massive Mush attack if you're ever invited to Keshi's wedding! (I can picture Guests in anaphylactic shock due to a romance overdose). So yeah let me save some lives by being single. btw me and my cuz are ok. We just needed to be clear on this...I told her how I felt, that's all.


Today's music is for the beautiful couple Silvara and Evs. You 2 make us believe that there is true love out there indeedz and together you can make your dreams come true. I wish you both all the happiness in the world! Have a fantastic wedding on Sat babez MWAH! You're gonna look gorgeous I can't wait to see the pics! And HAPPY HONEYMOONING TOO ooh lala ;-)! Silvara here's my e-wedding-pressie for ya at Kama Sutra. LOL I know I'm such a lusty biatch! Just don't break your neck/back darling.



Current Music: The Power Of Love by Celine Dion

163 Cranium Signets:

AVIANA said...

I feel you on this but could you have saved you rant on another post! funny how you start all happy and congratulatory about her wedding and then you get all pissy about marriage in general and then flip the switch again and say congrats...funny..

yeah people who say stuff like that know that they are wrong and they are jealous and it slips out and then you catch them..you are living a much happier life....

i know...i get real lonely as i watch all the couples around me but hey i'd rather have someone be jealous of my happiness then me be sad and wish i was out of a marriage...

oh well...

have a nice one..

Margie said...

Hi Keshi
It took me a while to read that as I'm lying in bed with my laptop...I think I've got a touch of the flu my son has!
Yikes....I got to be better in the morning as I have lots to cook for Thanksgiving.

Congrats to your friend Silvara on her wedding day!

I tend to agree with all you said about marriage.
There are so many people that get married for all the wrong reasons, and so many that stay in miserable marriages.
I've been one of the lucky ones...
I married for love, and after many years I'm still in love, and love being married!

I know you don't want to hear this, but I do think there is a guy out there that is worthy of the wonderful person you are!
He just has not shown up yet!

Well, I've got to get some sleep!
Nitey nite swt hrt!

HUGGGGGGGGGZ!

Margie

WP2007 said...

Hi Keshi

We had a guy foaming at the mouth while he was looking at your picture.

We had to shoot him because we think he may have had rabies.

We chopped off his head and sent it to a lab.

LOL

Bev

Sweetstickychewy said...

Yeah as much as its such a lovely thought or preview when people get married. The thoughts of how marriages fall apart does send jitters down my spine. But there is always that desire.haha..:P

Am glad you cleared things out with ya cuzzy. *HUGZ* there are times i take a close cousin's expression wrongly as well. lol! Its really hard esp when via the phone or messenger. nothing beats face to face i guess. what you see is what you get. a better ground for speculation and conclusion.

Its a breeze once cleared up.:)



Congrats Silvara.:)

Keshi said...

Hey Lisa tnxx!


**but could you have saved you rant on another post! funny how you start all happy and congratulatory about her wedding and then you get all pissy about marriage in general and then flip the switch again and say congrats


Gawwwwwd did u even read my entire post? I guess not. I didn't trash MARRIAGE here. All I ever said was that MARRIAGE is not something that should be done cos u just wanna do it. It should come out of love and respect n understanding, like SILVARA n EVS have it. I did mention that in the middle of this post many time. I guess u didnt read the whole post, thats why u saw this post the way u saw it.


:)



**...i get real lonely as i watch all the couples around me but

hell me too. But that doesnt mean im UNHAPPY at other times. I hv my HAPPY moments too. And I bet those couples hv their UNHAPPY moments too. Did u think abt it?



**hey i'd rather have someone be jealous of my happiness then me be sad and wish i was out of a marriage...

Lisa if u want ppl to be jealous of ur happiness, then is it really love ur looking for or r ya just worried abt wut others think? THINK ABT IT.


HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGZ!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Margie now plz dun get sick!


**There are so many people that get married for all the wrong reasons, and so many that stay in miserable marriages.

Amen! And thats what I meant by this post. I didnt trash EVERY marriage as Lisa saw it :(


I know ur happily married like many of my friends here are. And I had u in my mind when I wrote the following line in this post:


****Marriage can only be real when there is true love, respect and understanding between the partners, like how Silvara and Evs, and some other friends here in my blog have it*****


:)


tnxx Margie MWAH!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

LOL Bev!


**We had a guy foaming at the mouth while he was looking at your picture

which pic?



Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Amy!

yes I hv the DESIRE too but its a very BIG committment.


**Its really hard esp when via the phone or messenger. nothing beats face to face i guess.

ur right abt that. I hope I didnt jump to conclusions here. Cos guess wut...after that call from her, she hasnt txtd me like she does regularly :(


Keshi.

AVIANA said...

yes i read the entire post....i got everything you said...i guess i should have been more articulate in my comment...

anits said...

hi keshi...congrats to ur fren...she is getting married to someone who she love...i think the success of marriage is not a matter of with or without parents approval..its all depends on how the husband and wife understand each other and they have give and take policy!

Dun b sad k! Even though we get married late we will get good life!
hugzzzzz

Keshi said...

ok Lisa so wut makes u think this post isnt approriate to be merged with Silvara's wedding wishes? Cos I really cant see the reason why u may think so and my intention wasnt that anyways. :(



** then you get all pissy about marriage in general

in general? did I say marriage in general is bad? or did I say that wut my cousin said was not the right thing to say?

All I ever intended from this post is that being with the wrong person cant be better than being single. Cos thats what my cuz intended by her statement.



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Anits ty sweetz!


**i think the success of marriage is not a matter of with or without parents approval..

yes ur spot on there!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

This post wasnt meant to trash Marriage altogether. All I intend to say thru this post is that being single is better than being married to the wrong person.

And I put that message with Silvara's wedding wishes post cos I see true love between she and Evs. they were in love for a long time and amidst many family probs, they r finally getting married...their DREAM is coming true. That shows the strength of their true love.

And thats what a real Marriage should be like.


Thats all I meant by this post. I didnt mean to trash anybody's marriage or upset Silvara by this post. Im actually shocked it's seen like that!



Keshi.

ishita said...

:)

Conratulations Silvara :)

Kesh...luvd the dedication for Silvara!

And yes, marriage works well for some and not so well for some...and some get along fine without it :) .. i see no point in debating it really coz every individual has their own destiny and I believe the fun lies in making the most of what you have :) and being happy with it all!

And any relationship is about "making it work" .. u said it right :)

Personally, marriages work best when we don't trivialize it...take things for granted...and worst of all, let cliche'd expectations blind us...

aah enough abt all this now! :)

Silvara must be in d midst of all the wedding celebrations...i can just imagine her radiant smile :)...God bless her!

tk care kesh...feels good to be back blogging...

*hugzzz*

oh and my regular blog "daily dose" is back too :)

Sweetstickychewy said...

***yes I hv the DESIRE too but its a very BIG committment.

Haha indeeds.one of the things that freak me.

Abt ya cuzzy, perhaps it will take some time. It took us a while till we can laugh about what happened.

*HUGZ*

Margie said...

I'm trying my best not to get sick Keshi!

Off to bed in a few mins.

I just wanted to share this with you before I go....

Marriage

Let there be such a oneness
between you that when one weeps
the other will taste salt.

I did not write that.
I found it in a book a long time ago, and I love it!
What do you think?
Isn't that how it should be?

Oh, have a wonderful weekend!
Is it nice n warm there?
It's so wintery here tonight.
We has snow this morning, and it's freezing tonight.

MWAH!

Margie

homo escapeons said...

Scientists found that “feelings of love originating from visual stimuli” activated the regions of the Brain that are associated with motivation to win a reward or as we like to call it "getting lucky".

The sad truth of the matter is that the 3 pound organ holding your ears apart IS our "heart".

Endevourme said...

//-
//** i always felt like alien here hehe

//why did u feel that way?

dont know, not in my hand, nothing intentional really! maybe wavelengths dont match? i dont know. dont mind :D!!

Lash said...

Changes dont happen overnight do they?

the whole idea of marriage stemmed from the 'dependence theory' - of one being protected/looked after by the other. And gradually the roles got divided to genders. So wedding/ marriages has been there for centuries now and it's pretty difficult to just take that out of the various priorities that one is expected to have..

that said, we are learning to unlearn norms. Questioning marriage and the compromises that we make with that is a part of that unlearning process. Maybe our generation has framed that question and the next generation might just go ahead and dump the idea into bin.. but thats a long time..

but i still feel one shouldnt get too pissy abt marriage because we never know. There are certain values and beliefs that we all hold, it could be right or wrong.. we get confused when we use that and try to judge the futility and utility of things around us. marriage might not bad, staying single isnt bad either. it's a value choice that every individual make.

i dont know i am just rambling.. there is plenty of free time for me today :)

Ghost Particle said...

thats It i never want to get married. From a guys perspective, this is very true, what if you are a hopeless nerdy romantic like muah...and then you hope and it never comes true! Sad. Just love life and love yourself. Hugs./

Menchie said...

Sadly, i know a lot of people whose marriages have failed. So I also agree that marriage is not a guarantee for a happy ending. Sometimes it's better to be single than to settle for someone just so you can say that you're married.

Sam said...

HEY!! congrats to Silvara and Evs!!!
Wish them both a great married life...

And well Keshi your views on marriage is seriously honest.. adn I like it!!
I too am not getting married unless and until i'm sure that i'm totally in love with teh girla dn really wanna spend my entire life with her....
At teh end of teh day all that is described in the BA song "have you ever really loved a woman?", is felt by a guy.. i think the search should be declared as over!!
I dunno, if there is a similar song for teh girls... but then marriage out of compulsion... eeks!! no way!!

Nora said...

Ok, I had planned a really intelligent, logical comment but when I read your last line about the Kama Sutra and "don't break your back darlin" I can hardly type from the laughter... Sorry, I'll have to get back to you with my original comment!
PS: Did you see my dress?

Nora

mutleythedog said...

Well my marriage ended after 17 years and I am now on my own. We ended up like you say as kinda flatmates or like brother and sister... nothing more. But I don't regret being married as I have 2 great kids - and a lot of it was great for a long while. People should be respected for that they are like you say Keshi babe. Now I am getting warnings about getting old alone... for fecks sake I would rather be on my own and old than stuck in the company of someone I didn't want to be with!!

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Keshi,
That's a load of thoughts regarding marriage, the good and the bad side of it. But marriage is still good despite the numerous failed marriages around. Marriage was instituted by God so it is inherently good. The reason why some marriages probably did not work out is the wrong approach that people have regarding it or people just fall out of love. Whatever the reasons maybe, they can never negate the validity and sanctity of true marriage. Otherwise, people will just be living in and out of successive failed relationships and society will deteriorate into a polygamous congregation no better than a flock of amorous animals. Don't get me wrong. I am not alluding to you or to any other person. I am just stating my two cents worth of opinion on this subject matter. No offense meant to anybody. I always respect the opinions and points of view of all people and I never intend to disparage anybody by a contrary opinion or point of view. Thanks for the thought provoking post. God bless and have a wonderful and peaceful day. Happy Thanksgiving Day too.

Cazzie!!! said...

Wonderful stuff :)

BUMBLE!!! said...

You're still young - the defeatism of not finding Mr. Right is kind of harsh towards yourself.

Maybe the key is just being in the right place to find the person - that said, you can always start your own dating site right here - you get enough comments and the bloggy peeps would probably help you out with your search.

That said, I think when we're alone and want to be with someone, we're more hyperaware of the things that other people say - at least I am.

Anyway... I'm up way too early. This is what happens when I fall asleep way too early. AAHH!!

Have a good 1.

Mu Tai Dong said...

I married with The Hitch.. is ok though not to worry you.

Southpaw unplugged said...

First of all congratulations in advance and again to silvara and evs...:)

Now coming back to the rest of the things , When i look back at times before i knew kay i was a loose canon, the only things i was good at were do my job successfully, drink like a fish and hv loads of sex....Today when a few of my friends get to know that i regularly pray and go to temple every week, they r like WTF...lol
I agree with ishi, it works for some and it doesnt for some, but wat makes me believe in marriage is that if it can work for an animal(not self-proclaimed by any means) like me it shud work for a lot of others as well...:)
So keep ur eyes open keshaaaay, i found her when i was 29..:D wink*

Helen said...

Aw, babes, I'm sure your sweet cousin said that just to fill the silence, people do that. Maybe your cuz knew this girl only wanted to get married, and she was just saying it reflectively like "well, she got her wish, at least she's married."

I don't know, but Keshi (and I'm just saying this b/c I love you) you can't be sensitive about this it will come across as insecurity and that will make people wonder and feel sorry for you hiding your sorrow behind a false bravado. Be confident, sister, you ARE right. Practically the whole world espouses the idea that individuals have to be paired to be happy, when in reality you are the only person who will ever make Keshi happy (and God of course, but heathens like myself should never say that) ; ) People have that self-actualization at different times in their life, and some figure it out in the middle of a relationship so the relationship has to change and grow, too.

You are RIGHT, Keshi, be confident, not sensitive to perceived slights. You are a WHOLE person, not the feminine half of a perfect whole.

Love you, Keshi, and I'm verra verra grateful for your friendship, sister.

Helen said...

Oh and tell Silvara Congrats! and Hot Tub sex doesn't work as well as it theoretically should.

(Old joke, one of my girlfriends was a virgin when she got married at 28, and she had all the positions and times for having sex PLANNED for her honeymoon. She was running over her sex itinerary with her girlfriends the night before her wedding, and it was like "...and then at 8pm we'll have sex in the hot tub--" and I said "Sex in water isn't that easy when you're new to the whole thing." And she had to totally rearrange her itinerary. I never asked, but I've always wondered if the itinerary worked.

vishesh said...

happy married life silvara!

keshi well keshi don't worry,your wait must have a meaning and i said you never know :) i stand by hwta i said,for i know i ma right...it is just a matter of time,for sometimes my mind travels to fast and i say it a little to early...but you will have a from the first rose to the last :)

clover said...

...glory unto the Rose that is Nuit the circumference of all, and glory unto the Cross that is the heart of the Rose!"

Be blessed on Thanksgiving Keshi. I agree, better to wait for true soulmate love. It exists, just jump on the rainbow.

Alok said...

Well Keshi ... if you know lata mangeshkar (one of the legedary singers of indian film history) ... she never got married and I remember a function where rekha ( another legendary actress in Indian fil industry) while paying compliment to lata said "when i look at lata didi i feel complete as a woman .. i dont feel tht a man is needed for giving meaning to a woman's life ....

marriage is not everything .. life can be equally successful with or without marriage and it depends on the individual wht they make out of a marriage ...

Any relationship can only be sustained if there is a common understanding, trust and respect and the most difficult part is common understanding ...

many a times couples feel tht they have tht common understanding and when they start living together they realised that those fanciful events and manners that they thought were common between them were not the only thing ... they do not have common grounds on lot of others ... and when that common ground is not there then comes understanding and sense to ensure tht common ground is reached and again that can be attained if the couple respects the ones that is not common ... (i might be sounding confused but still ...)

there is nothing wrong in being single if tht is out of choice and the faster we are able to move out of the mindset of the patriarchal society tht we live the netter it is for all of us ...

at the end of the day Keshi, it is ur life and u have to decide how u want to live with it and faster the people realise it the better it is for everyone

tc

alok

Tys on Ice said...

personally i think marraige is so damn overrated...its my opinion that marraige only benefits the man...infact iam really surprised how women still agree to it...to a man marraige gives them free unlimited sex , a maid, a companion, a nurse all rolled in one , while the woman gets someone who hopefully will protect her and provide for her...

iam all for a live in relationship..becoz one tends to avoid taking the other granted...it will be be great if woman who decides to walk off an unhappy marraige do not carry a stigma in todays society.....two people being together shld not be a society decision, it shud only be their own...

curryegg said...

Congratulation to Silvara. May happinese showering her... ^^

Well Keshi, if you really getting married, please tell me! I wish to know so that I can make my e-wedding card/gift to you.

And I am ok with my great grandmother death. Hope that she is in the heaven now. Thank for your concern keshi!
^^

Pri said...

heyyy ..firstly a hearty congratulations to ur friends more so because they are lucky to have found their soulmate...:)
uve rightly said tht its better to be single all ur life than to end up with the wrong guy...or let me put it as 'not the right guy'...
i dunno why most people think its really essential to get married...i mean hell...whyyy???
If uve found ur right guy/girl , thn cool...go right ahead...but i seriously think one shouldent get married juss cos ppl talk u into it...society wont come to ur rescue if u land up with the wrong person and get about misrable all ur life...
as the saying goes 'dont marry the guy u can live with...marry the guy u cant live without'...:)

cheers!!

Orikinla Osinachi. said...

Sweeeeeeeeeetttttttttiiiiiiiiiee
Keshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

You should ended the post after the first paragraph.

Congratulations to the couple.

For everyone who lives to see it, there is always a wedding day.

Cheers and God bless.

Ps said...

If you don't find the right person then marriage is really hell.
If you do, it is fanstastic.Some people are lucky.For some, after getting married, the rosy vision fades, and they cannot take reality.There is nothing,absolutely nothing wrong in remaining single through out your life.If one is not ready, one should not, just to get the 'married' tag--I mean, its YOUR life--why should you bother what society thinks.
I'm happy for Silvara--and glad you spoke your mind with your cuz.

Trinnie said...

Congratulations to ur friend Silvara and her Hubby Keshi! do tell her that i find her pretty unique and nice to the ears. i wonder, is that her real name?

abt the issue u raised keshi, u know its so deeply embedded in Indian society that if a girl isn't married she's incomplete. its sucks. five years back i graduated from school and a male friend from school called me up to wish me on my birthday a few weeks back. i heard his voice after a long time and we catching up on the past and discussing future plans. and he said, so now after two years ur getting married naa... and i was like why the heck am i gonna do that? marriage is still a long way off. and he replied that normally in us gujaratis the girls are married off at 20-22... if a girl doesn't get married married by 24-2 then somethings really wrong and its difficult to get a good male partner in the "marriage market" i hate that word. my mom used to use it sme time back and i loathed it! thankfully my mum realises my dreams and agrees that one shudnt get married just for the sake of it!

there's nothing wrong with being single keshi! in fact u enjoy life most without bonds like these! a partner will come along when life feels its the appropriate time! till then have a blast! :)

take care!

La vida Loca said...

that is well written.
i have always said better single than married to a wrong person.

Cinderella. said...

Being in love is beautiful, girl but know what ?
You gotta work at it..day in and day out.
And there would be times when you'd feel..."heck, why did I ever get into all this ?"
But you'll need to swim out of it.
Thats what I have learnt over the years.
And about, the stigma attached to being single.
I think thats crap, I'd rather stay single than end up with some creep who doesnt even wanna talk to me, when the place where he's sleep's is right next to me...!!!!
Exactly what you were trynna say.
So all cool girl.
Congrats, Silvara from moi.
I've been dreamin about the day arriving for me too....(since I was a little girl)....lol !!!
Take care bebo !
*hugs*

Sujit said...

happy marriage life to your friend :)..

Sameera said...

Excellent post dear!I too have seen many people around me just compromise and live with just anybody just cause of the "marriage" tag.And I go wild when someone asks,"When are you getting married?"...People and their stupid prejudices!

Anyways as long as we KNOW what we want in life,that's enough.

This song is one of my all time favs :)

Keshi said...

hey WB Ishi darlin!

I missed missed n missed ya here
:( HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGZ! Lovely to see u here again with ur wisdom decorating my life...simply beautiful feeling to hv ya bak!


**And yes, marriage works well for some and not so well for some...and some get along fine without it

very well-said!


And another thing I wanted to say was that ppl who dun hv the greatest marriage should not judge single ppl like they r some losers. That is so wrong.


I know alot of ppl hv GREAT marriages..REAL ones, with ups and downs, yet going strong. And Im a lover of marriage..I'd love to be married some day to a guy I love. But it doesnt happen I aint gonna call myself a LOSER either. Cos I'd rather be single than being married for the sake of it. And thats what I meant by this post.


I think u got wut I meant anyways :) tnxx for that Ish. And hey hv a lovely day MWAH!



Keshi.

Silvara said...

Keshi!!

Ohhhh u are too wonderful! thank you darling for this beautiful dedication! I have mehndi on my hands now and am just doing all last minute preps but I read ur comment on my blog and had to see it.

You're truly a good friend :D

I am getting married to the man of my dreams and this has made it even more special. Thank you.

As for your comments about marriage - I agree with you totally. Never get into something like that for the wrong reasons - just to have someone - it won't last. :)

I'll be back with pics :D

Keshi said...

and yeah I can imagine Silvara's excitement now..OMG I cud feel it all the way to Sydney!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

tnxx Amy MWAH!


yes it sometimes freak me out LOL!


**It took us a while till we can laugh about what happened.

very true...


she just txtd me :)

hv a good day sweetz!



-----------------------------------

hey Margie it must be getting colder there..TC of ur health sweetz.



**Let there be such a oneness
between you that when one weeps
the other will taste salt.


OMG thats such a profound quote! I LOVE THAT. I think I'll use that in my weddings vows some day, if I ever get married.


ty so much n HUGGGGGGGZ Margie!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

k HE u mite hv to explain that further to me cos I felt so blonde reading that..LOL u know Im not a genius as u r. so tell me wut u meant by that...

tnxx!


-----------------------------------


hey Endevour!

**maybe wavelengths dont match?

mebbe...




Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

LOVE THAT POST THATS THIS WEEKEND? THATS GREAT :)

KAYLEE said...

HOW ARE YOU TODAY KESHI?! I AM BETTER :)

Keshi said...

hey Lash WC n tnxx!


**we are learning to unlearn norms.

true..very well-said. It mite take time but we r already on our way..



**but i still feel one shouldnt get too pissy abt marriage because we never know

do I sound angry abt marriage? :)



** marriage might not bad, staying single isnt bad either. it's a value choice that every individual make.

totally agree!


ty very much..loved ur take on this topic!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Ghosty never say NEVER. How cud u be so disappointed abt Marriage justt cos of few bad marriages out there? I still believe in Marriage...it can work between 2 ppl who r REALLY in love. U know u can really love a woman right? Same way, there is a girl out there who feels the same way abt herself...wut if u meet her some day?



-----------------------------------


ty Menchie!


** So I also agree that marriage is not a guarantee for a happy ending.

true...very true. Alot of ppl think Marriage wud make em HAPPIER. But it is they themselves who hv to make it work and make it HAPPY for em.


**Sometimes it's better to be single than to settle for someone just so you can say that you're married.

well-said!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Sam tnxx!


**have you ever really loved a woman?", is felt by a guy.. i think the search should be declared as over!!


lol u sound so cute when u said that.


There r many equivalent songs for girls...:) Like the one that's playing in my blog rite now hehe. If I feel that POWER OF LOVE with a guy, then my search wud be ova too ;-)


-----------------------------------


heyya Nora MWAH!


**but when I read your last line about the Kama Sutra and "don't break your back darlin" I can hardly type from the laughter

LOL not only the back, if I ever try those positions, I'd look stupid hanging upside down from the ceiling not knowing wut the hell is wrong with me. LOL!


hey I cudnt see ur wedding dress Nora...that link didnt work :( And when is ur wedding btw sweetz?



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Mutley heyy!

**We ended up like you say as kinda flatmates or like brother and sister.

thats sad. Thats whats happening with my cuz's marriage too. Im worried abt em. but being Sri Lankan, I know she wud never ask for a divorce from him! Thats ever worse! To live like that for the sake of culture!


I think u did well. U had a good 17yrs of ur marriage and u hv great kids too. Marriage does hv its great advantages too. And who said u hv to be married forever for it to be called a 'good' marriage.

:) good on ya!

And abt being old...as long as ur heart is young, U R YOUNG.



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Hi Mel tnxx for ur honest opinion on this topic. I appreciate that.


**...people will just be living in and out of successive failed relationships and society will deteriorate into a polygamous congregation no better than a flock of amorous animals


I agree to a certain extent, that marriage is an institution of discipline. It protects the society and civilisation in guarded manner. BUT I also believe 2 ppl dont need to be married to hv a REAL r'ship.


Like u said, Marriage is a sacred bond that should not be taken for granted...its hard work and beckons alot of RESPECT, TRUST n LOVE.


ty Mel!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

tnxx Caz MWAH!


-----------------------------------

hey Bumble tnxx!


**dating site

hehehe yeah I cud easily do that ha :):)



** I think when we're alone and want to be with someone, we're more hyperaware of the things that other people say - at least I am.

true! I think somehow wut she told hit me hard...mebbe I felt bad for the reason u mentioned.


tnxx Bumble hv a good day now! :)




Keshi.

Keshi said...

WC Mu Tai Dong!


**I married with The Hitch

wut exactly d u mean? LOL!


-----------------------------------


Southy I know u and K hv a great marraige and Im very glad for ya. HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!



**Today when a few of my friends get to know that i regularly pray and go to temple every week, they r like WTF

LOL! So now u pray at the temple n all?


My dad was like ya...big tough Police guy who dun like praying etc. LOL so sweet!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyya Helen HUGGGGGGGGGZ!


**Aw, babes, I'm sure your sweet cousin said that just to fill the silence

I wish she said that for that reason. Cos Helen darling I sensed it wasnt for that :( I really did. U know the tone of speech...it speaks volumes.



**you can't be sensitive about this it will come across as insecurity and that will make people wonder and feel sorry for you hiding your sorrow behind a false bravado

I know and nah I wont be upset with ya for telling that :) HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ! Mebbe deep down I do feel lonely n sad..thats prolly why I reacted that way with her? Who knows...


I love having u honest friends with me here...u guys really make me realise thinsg abt my own self. ty and I love ya too!


And tnxx Helen for the wishes for Silvara. She's gonna look DAZZLING!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hi again beautiful Helen!


**and I said "Sex in water isn't that easy when you're new to the whole thing." And she had to totally rearrange her itinerary. I never asked, but I've always wondered if the itinerary worked.


LOL hahahaha I cant stop laughing! I wonder if she did all the aqua activities as planned LOL!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww tnxx Vish! :)


My wait is eternal btw LOL!


**but you will have a from the first rose to the last

I didnt quite get that...how d u mean?



----------------------------------


Happy TG to ya Clover!


**I agree, better to wait for true soulmate love

well-said!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Alok tnxx!


**lata mangeshkar

Ofcourse I know her! She's got the BEST voice in India. I admire here alot. But I didnt know she was single. WOW!



**"when i look at lata didi i feel complete as a woman .. i dont feel tht a man is needed for giving meaning to a woman's life ....


wow very beautifully stated! I know Rekha too...she's lovely.


Alok wut u said is true...life can be successful with or w.o. marriage. Its how u see it and wut u want in life. Everyone's dreams differ.



**Any relationship can only be sustained if there is a common understanding, trust and respect and the most difficult part is common understanding ...

spot on!


ty so much for that very wise words Alok!




keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Tys tnxx!


**to a man marraige gives them free unlimited sex , a maid, a companion, a nurse all rolled in one , while the woman gets someone who hopefully will protect her and provide for her...

So its equally patronising isnt it :)



**its my opinion that marraige only benefits the man...

I think Indian marriages r like that. The men benefit more than the women. Cos Indian men depend alot on their women when it comes to household chores etc.

But times r changing that even Indian women r now looking for men who can equally contribute to the marriage in all areas, including scrubbing the bathroom floor ;-) (that necessity btw was added by Keshi). LOL!


Live-ins r great but my mum wud disown me completely, worse shoot me if she can. LOL!


tnxx Tys!



Keshi.

SaffronSaris said...

Congrats to Silvera!!!

Keshi said...

Curry tnxx n HUGGGGGGGGZ! Ur granma is in a good place now...


**Well Keshi, if you really getting married, please tell me! I wish to know so that I can make my e-wedding card/gift to you.

aww how sweet! But worry not my darling, there's ample time for that, perhaps another good 20yrs. LOL!


-----------------------------------


Pri tnxx hun!


My aunts think Im mental just cos Im not married yet, or atleast hv a BF. Thats the way they see me cos we come from a frikkin Sri Lankan family with a shitty attitude abt single women.


**but i seriously think one shouldent get married juss cos ppl talk u into it...society wont come to ur rescue if u land up with the wrong person and get about misrable all ur life...


very well-said Pri! U know a cuz of mine got married to a girl he didnt even date...it was a proposal. They hv 2 young kids. They fight all the time. Somehow now my cuz left his house. She lives there. His life is miserable. So is her's.

And they got married cos his mum wanted him to marry b4 he gets too old. Now his mum is dead and all other relatives r laughing at his marriage. I feel sorry for him but isnt it a choice he made just to pleass his mum?



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Ori tnxx!


**You should ended the post after the first paragraph.


why?


Ori d u think that my argument abt marriage wud upset Silvara? I dun think so. Cos she and Evs r really in love and they know together they hv a great future, irrespective of few failed marriages out there. And my argument wasnt abt THEM (Silvara n Evs). It was abt being single and not being with the wrong man.


I dun see how that wud affect my Wishes to the couple?? Seriously!


-----------------------------------

PS ty so much!

U being a successfuly mmaried woman and a mother too, Im glad u were being honest with ur comment.


**For some, after getting married, the rosy vision fades, and they cannot take reality.

so true! And thats what happened with my cuz's marriage. She fell in love and got married straight away. And now she's suffering...



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Trinnie tnxx hun!

Silvara is her net Id...her real name is Ayesha. She's a beautiful, kind and adorable girl. Very down-to-Earth too.



**u know its so deeply embedded in Indian society that if a girl isn't married she's incomplete.

OMG Trinnie tell me abt it! One old aunt (a friend of mum) told me this - yes she said it to my face:

"Keshi u hv no value without a man in ur life, u r so incomplete".


I got to pissed off with her I walked out of the living room just then, cos had I stayed I'd hv kicked her. And I know I shouldnt be kicking old ladies. LOL!

She must be some old Indian Pathidevi or whatever u call that, lol but I aint gonna get married just so that i feel 'valuable'. Im valuable just the way I am..cos I was born alone into this world..so do I need another humanbeing to complete me? I dun think so!



yes I know..Indian ppl think that if a girl isn tmarried before 25, that something is wrong with em. But I think times r changing now...


**"marriage market"

ewwwwww wut a yukky term! Its like marriage is a 2-min Noodle pack that u can get off the shelf of a Supermarket LOL!


yes my mum too understand's me and Im glad that she doesnt force me into marriage. I dun even consider Arranged Marriages..I hv told her that clearly and so she leaves me alone :)


ty Trinnie n u too hun!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty LaVida! :) MWAH!


-----------------------------------

Hey Cinderella HUGGGGGGGGZ!

yes its alot of work..and if one cant commit to it, then better stay single than bring children into this world and wreck their lives too.



**I've been dreamin about the day arriving for me too

awwww u planning to hv it soon?



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Sujit tnxx mate!



-----------------------------------

Hey Sameera tnxx!



**,"When are you getting married?"..

LOL I know. Next time they ask u that say this: "When u shutup".


:):) HUGGGGGGGGGZ!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

OMG Silvara ur comment was the 69th LOL! It must be some SIGN ha. :):)


Mehendi wow! I'd love to see ya all radiant n happy...hv the best day of ur life tmrw girl! U r giving ur hand to a guy who truly adores, loves, respects and understands ya...no one else has given that to u. So I know ur gonna hv the best life together with him!



**Never get into something like that for the wrong reasons - just to have someone - it won't last

spot on!


hv a blast swt hrt MWAAAAHHHHHHHHH!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Kaylz MWAH!

yes its tmrw! Her wedding. And also the Aus elections haha! I asked Silvara to go vote in her wedding gown...awwww...


Im well ty n u?


-----------------------------------


ty Saffy!



Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

Im well ty n u?//


I AM NOT SO WELL STILL IN LOTS OF PAIN!!!!!!!!! I AM SO DEPRESSED RIGHT NOW :(

Jim said...

I am heart broken Silvara
Sighh

i guess he is a better man
BEST WISHES

Keshi said...

Kaylz u cant be depressed cos ur with Keshi rite now :) Cheerup!



-----------------------------------

Jim there r many MEN out there, not only u LOL!




Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

//Kaylz u cant be depressed cos ur with Keshi rite now :) Cheerup!//

AWWW YES TALKING TO YA DEFINATELY MAKES ME FEEL BETTER HUGGGGGZ!!!!

Keshi said...

MWAH K! :)

Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

Thank you keshi.....love you.I will get threough this.The heart hasnt been bothering me its this stomache thing and the breathing.....the part that scares me is the amount of people that have died this year from it!

Silvara said...

OMG - I came back and all these beautiful wishes for me....I'm seriously touched. so many people wishing me....I'm speechless. Thank you ALL for your kind thoughts - I appreciate every one of them :)

And Keshi I forgot to mention - 69 is gonna be a VERY good number :P Your pressie will come in handy heheheh

WP2007 said...

Hi Keshi

Have a great weekend and think of us Canucks freezing to death. A storm splashed us with every kind of precip one can imagine.

LOL

HUGS

Bev

Peter said...

You are incredible! But, too much to read carefully and comment now; it's 2.30 am and I must go to bed! Back tomorrow!

Jim said...

Sometimes folks want to get hitched in cyberspace. Although such a marriage isn't legally binding, they are growing in popularity.

Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 10 minutes

Here's How:
Since the Internet isn't a place or a legal entity in itself, people can't be legally married on it.

The ceremony could take place through the Net, but the legal aspects must be fulfilled in a real location.

Decide if the ceremony is for fun or the real thing.
If it's for fun, make sure that both of you understand that it isn't a legal marriage.


Palmistry Marriage Report
Discover amazing secrets about your Marriage in the Lines of your Palm!
www.aboutastro.com


If it's for real, then you need to follow the legal requirements of the jurisdiction where you are physically located.

Decide if you want to have guests.
If you are having guests, then using one of the cyber chapels that utilize chat rooms would make it more enjoyable and fun.

Don't confuse people. Let them know up front if this is a ceremony for fun or the real thing.
Make sure you get a certificate!

Keshi said...

Orikinla Osinachi wrote:




Good soul touching post.

A woman can be very happy without sex.

If what you need a man for is all about his manhood, then it would be a great irony.

What kind of men have you met and you were disappointed?

Wise women don't fall in love with dummies or brutes.

Be wise.

Let your brains guide you and not your loins.

Look for the heart and soul of a man and not his perishable possessions or acquisitions.

You know what we call GIGO?
Babes who love the gig will end up in the arms of the gigolo and the gigolo will end up leaving them in the loo.
Garbage in, garbage out.

I am really saying thing, because I always see your disappointments with men creeping or crawling into your posts like worms in fruits and they turn your sweet apples into sour grapes.

The more positive you are about men, the more positive ones who will come your way.

You need to read "The Prophet" by that great Lebanese artist and poet, Gibran.

Cheers and God bless.


Ori.

Keshi said...

Kaylz why r ya thinking of death now? Ur still alive. So enjoy every moment hun.


Besides, even if death is near me, I wont be afraid. Cos whats so great abt life that death can take away? :) Everything ends, even in life.


HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

-----------------------------------


Silvara u deserve all the wishes cos ur such a great gal.


LOL @69! How abt 99? hahahaha! Try that.




Keshi.

Keshi said...

Bev Im so glad Im in Aus rite now. LOL!

Hv a good snowy one babez! dun freeze ur buttocks tho. HUGS!



-----------------------------------

No worries Peter. Take ur time.
:)


Nitey Nite!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim...e-marriages..they really exist?


**Discover amazing secrets about your Marriage in the Lines of your Palm

how abt finding it in my nostrils? LOL!





Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyy Ori!


**What kind of men have you met and you were disappointed?

does it matter now Ori? It was in the past. But I dun judge all men thru those experiences.


**Wise women don't fall in love with dummies or brutes. Be wise. Let your brains guide you and not your loins.

So ur saying I was stupid to fall in love? Just cos I was in a few wrong r'ships, does that make me DUMB? And nah Im not the kind of woman who goes by my LOINS as u put it. Im surprised u even said that to me.



**Look for the heart and soul of a man and not his perishable possessions or acquisitions.

Its easier said than done to find a man with some soul.



**You know what we call GIGO?
Babes who love the gig will end up in the arms of the gigolo and the gigolo will end up leaving them in the loo. Garbage in, garbage out.

urrrrgg! I dun even know why ur saying this to me Ori cos Im in no bin! Just cos I had some wrong men in my life, it doesnt mean I slept with all of em and hv ended up in some rotting bin. Im quite disappointed with ya for even implying that!




**I am really saying thing, because I always see your disappointments with men creeping or crawling into your posts like worms in fruits and they turn your sweet apples into sour grapes.

So wut if it does Ori? That doesnt mean Im SOUR 24/7?? When it affects me, I write abt it. When it doesn't, Im fine. Life is full of good and bad moments...happy and sad etc etc. I dun hv to be smiling 24/7 do I?



**The more positive you are about men, the more positive ones who will come your way.

so u see me as a NEGATIVE woman..a woman who's negative abt men? Then u dun know me at all. Im very POSITIVE abt men in many ways. Or else I wont hv alot of men in my blog to begin with..and in my real life too. I hv great many BFs...good guy friends. Just cos I dun hv a partner yet, that doesnt mean Im NEGATIVE.


Im really shocked u categorise me into the kind of women who r in the BIN cos of some rotten men.



Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

//Kaylz why r ya thinking of death now? Ur still alive. So enjoy every moment hun.//

I am trying too the docs just keep telling me that and its annoying I do enjoy it :(

KAYLEE said...

ps read my post i wrote today when you can :P

Jim said...

Then Almitra spoke again and said, "And what of Marriage, master?"

And he answered saying:

You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.

You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.

Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.

But let there be spaces in your togetherness,

And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another but make not a bond of love:

Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.

Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.

Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,

Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.

For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.

And stand together, yet not too near together:

For the pillars of the temple stand apart,

And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
the poet
Kahlil Gibran

THANKS Ori

Keshi said...

Kaylz cmon u can do better than that...just learn to live in this moment...nothing else matters.

HUGGGGGGGZ!

And I read ur post n commented :)



-----------------------------------


Jim yeah thats all poetry..find me a guy who follows that.



Keshi.

KAYLEE said...

THANKS KESHI! I feel better now.. i know i will fight this and be okay :)

Jim said...

its all about PERCEPTION Keshi
what u say is not important

what others percieve is

Keshi said...

good on ya K!



-----------------------------------

hey Jim!


**what u say is not important
what others percieve is

o I already know that. But my perception matters to ME.



Keshi.

Southpaw unplugged said...

Yes, now i believe in Him...:)

KAYLEE said...

:) I might not blog after today for awhile!

WP2007 said...

Hi Keshi

To answer your question:

The pic in the last post with you looking back.

Don't ask why.

LOL

Bev

Keshi said...

Good on ya Southy!

but sometimes I get angry with Him...these days, its all the time.


-----------------------------------

why K? :(



-----------------------------------

LOL Bev WHY? I wanna know I wanna know I wanna know :)




Keshi.

WP2007 said...

Give me the weekend to find out why. The guy didn't tell me why.

Since we have killed him, we'll have to bring him back from the dead.

LOL

Bev

Keshi said...

LOL Bev u funny girl! I was laughing on the train this morning just thinking abt that 'rabies' comment of ur's. HAHAHAHAHA!

u can do one thing to bring him bak from the dead...tickle his butt. LOL!



Keshi.

Sugababee said...

Congrats Silvara!!!

Kesh good point about marriages but mate what can we do bout em traditional minds... *sigh*

Keshi said...

hey Suga tnxx hun!

**but mate what can we do bout em traditional minds

hehe yeah..pretty much nothing :)



keshi.

Sugababee said...

P.S.

I want to get married too!!!
:(
*sniff*

Keshi said...

aww u will Suga..cmon!

:)
Keshi.

anuj said...

best wishes to silvara n her better half.
God Bless !!

being single aint bad at all keshi ..

Lash said...

neither did i think you were angry abt marriage...

yet, isn't there some sort of resentment in your mind about that idea? for whatever reason that is, i felt so....

maybe i am wrong. anyway, have a nice day :) you dont have to post this comment. i was just clarifying
:)

Jeevan said...

I completely agreed with your point of views on marriage that leads to a beautiful living.

From your post I felt the pair must be made to each other, I wish them happy married life, have a nice times attending their marriage Keshi. Happy weekend too :)

Ashu said...

Congrats to silvara for the best moment in her life.

Not all marriages are fairy tales or even the zing doesnt last in them once the honeymoon period (whatever duration) is over.

I m glad you have the courage to break away against some crap norms of the society against marriage or being involved with some man ultimately leading to marriage..

i feel that you got to be totally confiding in the person you marry along with you need to be in total love with him. Half hearted measures or forced marriages never work and some point of time they are going to break down!!!!

All in all a cracking post once again!!!

anirudh said...

hey keshi u still going strng here....long time since i stopped at dis place...feels nice again..!
hows u?

AmitL said...

Hi,Keshi...great tribute to Silvara.

And,I couldn't help smiling at your views that followed,especially with your obsession with what your cuz said about' at least she's married'.:) You know,when people make a comment like that,they many-a-times refer to themselves.

But,frankly,Keshi,let me say-yes, marriage is not an easy institution-needs lots of adjustments,lots of 'getting to know each other',thoughts,feelings,forgetting one's ego,adjusting with each other's families..:)

And,you're so right-some people still think traditionally,that a guy is a must in a girl's life,and vice versa,and that through the institution of marriage.:)
My views would take up a post,so,better not continue,or,u'll fall asleep.

Anyway,all in all,some nicely expressed views,Keshi.:)Have a nice weekend.

KP said...

my best wishesh for Silvara...:)

Top cat said...

Happy Wedding day to your friend.
Have a great weekend keshi.
Hugs
tc

akanksha said...

That was all so thought provoking dear...nice post!
and as far as wedding is concerned, remember that there's someone made exclusively for u!!!!

Good luck and many congratulations to ur friend...:-)

Bla said...

Now that's a scary topic! :)

oceanic mirages said...

my best wishes to silvara and her husband to be.........
may god bless them with a romance that never dies.
well i agree to whatever u said about marriage and have myself decide to marry for love and not for the other mercenary reasons that are found so attractive by the cultural norms...

B/w how have u been?

Coco said...

keshi,
finding a GOOD man with whom to share a life with is difficult, but don't give up! and also, don't lower your standards!!

*you don't need a "mate" in order to be the best that you are!!
*a "mate" doesn't make you happy,
you need to be happy with yourself first!!

1. don'"t get married just to get married
2. don't marry anyone just off the street
3. don't marry just to have children
4. don't marry just to have an income ($)
5. don't marry just to buy a house

*marry because you BOTH love, respect and honor each other...

*marry because you want to share your life with the other person...

*marry because you feel that this person would make a WONDERFUL parent to your children...

*marry because you share the same dream, values, and morals...

sorry, got kind of preachy...

have a wonderful weekend!! : )

hugs and blessings.

Jim said...

Yes COCO

i learnt the hard way
through experience

Jim said...

Thursday, October 25, 2007
FAQs
If you were chosen by WUB moderators to represent your country , this info for you !

Why did you choose me?
We chose you because we think that you are one of the best bloggers online and will be an honor for us if you join the best bloggers online .

How did you choose me?
According to many thing , Design , Content , Concepts , Activity , Free comments .

What should I do ?
You can post , comment & share your life experience .

Should I post ?
No , but it will be nice to read your post here .

What should I do before posting?
Just read the rules.

Will you fire me if i don`t post?
Surly no!

Posted by Ameer at 10/25/2007 12:58:00 PM 5 comments Labels: links, wub system



View blog reactions

KAYLEE said...

//why K? :(//

Well i was just going to take a break but,now I am back in the ER this time for probably a few days!They wont let me go off easy this time LOL! Its a new doctor my regular one got transferred to another hospital in another state.and this doc is better!! I can tell already!!! How are you keshi today????? HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND!!

Jim said...

Friday, November 23, 2007
I wanna laughUntil I cry
Wake up with you each day 'till the day that I die

Let's go to New Orleans
And watch the parade
Take funny pictures, eat jambalaya, and drink lemonade
And when the day is finally over
And we stumble home
Before we sleep
Baby, marry me

I wanna drive
Until we get lost
Lie in a field staring up at the sky
While you point out the Southern Cross
Somehow I know
Without asking why
That you love me more in a minute
Than anyone could in a lifetime

Dancing in the parking lot
While the band plays inside
Sweep me off my feet
Baby, marry me

We don't need no preacher man
Readin' from the Good Book
And I don't want no fancy dress
Ain't no ceremony for the vows that I took

From the moment I met you
I have been blessed
So let's make a toast
And drink up the wine
Here's to you lying here next to me
Until the end of time

Wherever you are
I wanna be
And anything that means anything to ya
Means everything to me

Sneakin' out the back door
While they're throwing the rice
And they'll talk for weeks
But we're all we need

So baby, if you're free
Marry me
Baby, marry me

Marry me

Posted by Jim at 3:34

Amey said...

Wish a long and happy married life to your friend from us!!!

And I am sure we will be reading the post regarding your marriage soon :D

Steph said...

Silvara will no doubt make a beautiful bride. I wish her all the love and happiness in the world.

chocolteluva said...

welll u know how i feel about this... EXACTLY the same way u do. and its funny how all of a sudden people are "relieved" once they hear of a girl engaged ... to be married or married. what was i a liability to u???

hahaha... morons!!

anyways.. i dont want a big wedding either.. just family. cause when u have big weddings u get too many ppl that are there just to criticize instead of be happy for u.. somehow nothing u do will please them. if the wedding is small --> ure cheap.
if the wedding is big --> ure trying to show off.

and the biggest difference to notice here is .. there is a difference between a WEDDING AND A MARRIAGE. wedding -- mostly for other ppl, to announce ure marriage. marriage - is what really matters. many ppl loose the meaning of marriage trying to have BIGGG weddings.

Zhu said...

I'm not sure where your cousin lives but this might be a culture thing... we're all influenced by our culture, our parents etc.

Right now in France people marry late if they marry at all. Getting married was unthinkable for me in France... but in Canada, people marry somewhat younger and they're more casual about it. So I guess I changed my mind ;)

Vest said...

My nearest and dearest and I have complete trust in one another, I get and give several hugs each day together with "I love you". A couple of weeks ago in passing she said "I love you Mr big Dick". it has been a slight embarrassment since then as our 14 yr old G/daughter heard it and laughing replied "Naughty Grandma".
Married 54 years. vest

Mirage said...

Wish ur friend a world of happiness!!

Take care Keshi! :)

lee said...

In a way I can understand what your cousin said -it's a natural thing that could slip out :). Even now that I'm by myself I must admit that I've had the thought:"well, at least I've been married". And when I think that it doesn't mean that I would ever look down on anyone who has never been married, rather that for myself, at the age of 37, in some weird way it is a comfort in some way for me to remember it :).

Parisian Cowboy said...

I love weddings.....

niki yokota said...

congrats on ur friend's marriage!!
may their love last forever!
i have a very nice boss so i dont get jealous with those housewives ;)
happy weekend keshi-chan!!

Jim said...

George Orwell said: "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear."




in defence of Jim

Paul Champagne said...

I think that it is completely different with girls than with guys. Single guys pressure their friends to stay single, while single girls seem to aspire to becoming wives. It's a wonder how there are any marriages at all.

Golden Words said...

love that song thats playing, power of love.. indeed.
congrats to your friend.

Vinesh said...

you surely sound like u would have a type of wedding that would be covered by a reality show :-)

enjoyed reading your post!

tulipspeaks said...

thats one of the reason why i am avoiding weddings among relatives now. only attending weddings of my friends as there won't be any aunties trying to matchmake me with their sons or ask me idiotic questions why im still unmarried! ggrrr!!


btwn, my wishes to Silvara!!!Got a wedding to attend today as well.. both the bride & groom r my university mates.. can't avoid this one!




ammu.

Deepak Gopi said...

I love feast which is served during wedding.

Hazel Dream said...

hi Keshi Girl how have you been .. Long time .. you havent changed

Stace said...

Ahhh, marriage, when it's right, is so beautiful... but it's not because of being married, it's just because of two people very much in love making a commitment to each other. I think you're spot on, a person does not need to be married to have happiness or gain acceptance. Getting married for the sake of it is probably one of the stupidest things I can think of - although I intend no offence to anybody's traditional values, I certainly don't share them and I won't hide that. Once you're married, and it starts to turn to shit, options are limited. Better to find out that it wouldn't have worked BEFORE the wedding.

wallycrawler said...

I think that was a honest post. You were inwardly conflicted about how the world sees women as incomplete until they are wed and the happiness of your friends nuptials. I think the way society sees women in that light is unfair too Keshi! A woman is as complete as a man on any grounds. Be'n married means being comfortable with another person. It's not everything. I'm glad you didn't enhance the "Myth".

The funny thing about this post is...I think one of your pictures has Penelope Cruz in a wedding dress, hasn't she been married like 4 times?

Camplin said...

Well, at least all marriages end in either a beautiful tragedy or an ugly tragic ending. Death or divorce.

Nadine said...

Being married for the sake of being married is not a reason to do it. Waiting for the right person to enter your life - someone who you trust, love, respect and is your best friend. That will make it last through tough times and the good times will be even better. Don't settle Keshi - you are deserving of the right man for you. The one who will treat you the way you should be treated - like a princess.

Crazy Me said...

Ugh ... marriage! Been there, done that. I'm happy with my boy exactly as we are.

Blessed said...

Hey Keshi!
I honestly can say that I have never personally known someone who got married just for the stature of it. Everybody I know as gotten married becuz they were so in love.
Suckers!! Ha Ha!
I had to say that cuz marriage is definitely a hard thing! Very hard!
No one could ever explain explicitly or in enough detail what ALL is involved. Even if they tried to explain, love is blind, baby! We think we can conquer this marriage thing as if it was a piece of cake! WRONG!
Anywho, I am all for marriage but it definitely should not be taken lightly....as soooooooo many do.

As for the actual marriage ceremony, it really blows me away ALL the money that are spent on some very extravagant affairs.
To me, it's a waste. I rented a dress and got married in a wham bam thank you ma'am chapel in the mountains. I had 32 family and friends that attended.
Tho it was cheap and it was pretty I wish I had went off to the beach and gotten married barefoot, in a cotton dress with the waves lapping over my feet.
Maybe next time........
just kidding!

Keshi said...

hehe yes Anuj.

And tnxx!


-----------------------------------

No worries at all Lash :) n tnxx!



-----------------------------------

ty so much Jeevan!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Ashu tnxx!

**Half hearted measures or forced marriages never work and some point of time they are going to break down!!!!


Spot on! Im glad u understood well wut I was trying to convey thru this post. :) tnxx Ashu!



-----------------------------------


hey Anirudh WB n tnxx!


yes Im still here :) but dunno for how long...anyways Im here now yes hehe...



Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty so much Amit and Im so glad u understood wut I was trying to say here...

wut u said is 100% correct abt marriage..


tnxx mate!


-----------------------------------

KP tnxx!


-----------------------------------

hey ty Rick!



-----------------------------------


aww tnxx Akanksha!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

tnxx Bla!


-----------------------------------

WC Oceanic!


**have myself decide to marry for love and not for the other mercenary reasons that are found so attractive by the cultural norms...

spot on!


And Im pretty good ty and urself? Do I know u from before? I cant recall ur nic tho...




Keshi.

Keshi said...

wow Coco that was truly GOLD advice, TY n HUGGGGGGGGGGGZ!

I agree with everything u said there!


-----------------------------------

tnxx Jim!




-----------------------------------


Hi Kaylz! I hope ur having a better day today. HUGGGGGGGGZ!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Amey tnxx!

**And I am sure we will be reading the post regarding your marriage soon

LOL u wish ha...


-----------------------------------

tnxx Stepher!



-----------------------------------

hey Choco WB! HUGGGGGGGGGGGGZ! I hv been missing ya...


yes ur spot on abt this, as usual :) if ur single, its like ur a liability to the society..morons indeed!


**and the biggest difference to notice here is .. there is a difference between a WEDDING AND A MARRIAGE

VERY WELL-SAID! And that was the true meaning behind my title that no many ppl seemed to hv noticed. Atleast one person here spotted it...WELL-DONE Choco! Smarty pants :)

Wut u said is so true...wedding is not the biggest part of it all...it should be the marriage.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Zhu tnxx!

Yes, marriage traits differ from country to country..rather culture to culture.


-----------------------------------

Vesty Im so glad u hv a beautiful marriage with ur wife and fo so long too!


**I love you Mr big Dick

ROFL!



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Mirage tnxx hun!


-----------------------------------


Heyya Lee!


**in some weird way it is a comfort in some way for me to remember it

yes it wud be...if the memories were pleasant like it is for u :)


HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

Parisian ty and WC!


-----------------------------------

hey Niki tnxx!


ur in love with ur boss Niki? LOL!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Jim!


**"If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear."


I did that recently with a friend and she took it all wrong. Will blog abt it soon. So now I'd like to shutup.

:)


-----------------------------------

hey Paul!


**. Single guys pressure their friends to stay single, while single girls seem to aspire to becoming wives

so true! :):)



-----------------------------------

ty Golden n hey WC!




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Vinesh WC!


**you surely sound like u would have a type of wedding that would be covered by a reality show

LOL I wudnt be surprised!


-----------------------------------

hey Ammu I know wut u mean. Rite now I cant even go to a family bday party LOL! ppl just ask dumb qns all the time.


Enjoy ur friends' wedding! Pass my best wishes to em!


-----------------------------------

Deepak tnxx yeah I love wedding food! :)



-----------------------------------

hello Hazel :)




Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Stace!

**but it's not because of being married, it's just because of two people very much in love making a commitment to each other

Spot on! Thats how it should be.


tnxx hun!

-----------------------------------

hey Wally hows u? :)


yes I agree with everything u said abt marriage. U were spot on!



**Penelope Cruz in a wedding dress, hasn't she been married like 4 times?


LOL is that her? I thought its some other model in that pic. :):):)



Keshi.

Keshi said...

Camplin ty n WC!


**at least all marriages end in either a beautiful tragedy or an ugly tragic ending. Death or divorce

lol so true!


-----------------------------------


Nadine ty so much!


**Don't settle Keshi

that was some very good advice to any person!


HUGGGGGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

Good to hear that Crazy_Me. :)




-----------------------------------

hey Blessed tnxx hun!


** I rented a dress and got married in a wham bam thank you ma'am chapel in the mountains. I had 32 family and friends that attended.

sounds like it all came from the heart...and thats all that matters :)


yes I'd like a very simple wedding too...one at the beach hehe.


HUGGGGGGGGZ beautiful!



Keshi.

Vidya said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vidya said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vidya said...

I was talking to Preeti when she alerted me to this post and I am glad I stopped by.

The truth is that many women settle because it is important to reach the right "landmark" at the "right" age. In order to reach this "goal" and to cater to our own insecurities (specific to our own gender), we settle! But this is my take on it, Keshi. People are always going to talk. Today it is your cousin who inadvertently let something slip out. Tomorrow it is going to be someone else. If we were to get worked up over every small remark, life is not going to be good for US! :D

I too want to come home to someone who I love and someone who dotes on me. Lets hope that both these "someone" are one and the same person! :D Jokes apart, I would not want to settle just because I could not find someone.

So Keshi girl, you lead your fun life and be happy! :D People will ALWAYS talk, no matter what

DJ said...

ooo...my lips are sealed on this one :)

but nonetheless, congrats to your friend who found her life-partner...

tc...

Keshi said...

ty Vidya!

I agree with everything u said.


**Can we shut the whole world up? No, just brush it off.

yeah thats true too, tnxx sweetie!



** But do I want to settle? Not only NO but HELL NO!

LOL! :)


I hope we both find our men, if not, we'll still be happy...we just wont 'settle' right? :) Great advice there Vidya tnxx n HUGGGGGGZ!


-----------------------------------

DJ ok :):)




Keshi.

Amey said...

We do, my dear friend... we do!

Drama Div@ said...

Finding the right partner is not a simple matter.. it's not like buying cloth in the suppermarket where you try all the clothes you like within one hour, grab one, later if you changed your mind for any reason, you are welcome to return it within 30 days, it's not that easy okay..

one of mt aunties used to tell me (infront of everybody during family get-together thingy), look at your sis, she was already a divorcee with two kids when she got marry to her current husband.. how come you're still single.. I felt so embarrassed, ashamed and hurt.

Dalicia said...

i see that marriages isn't all that! i mean, i'm happy that they found their partner. then again,
you don't know if they're happy??

it's with this ppl. that when you're married it's like you've accomplished something.

take a look at the divorce rate.
everyone advice me to take my time. and don't get married just because someone thinks is the idea of the perfect life.

life is not perfect!!

Keshi said...

:) Amey...


-----------------------------------

hey Diva thats so true..its not like buying stuff :)


**look at your sis, she was already a divorcee with two kids when she got marry to her current husband.. how come you're still single..

ur aunt said that to ya? dun worry, there r alot of ppl who open their mouths w.o. THINKING. Thats so sad!



**I felt so embarrassed, ashamed and hurt.

HUGGGGGGGGGGZ! Always know that ppl can say anything to ya, but u hv a right to say somethingto them too. So u should hv told her that wut she said was very hurtful and not to judge you based on other ppl's lives.



Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Dalicia I agree 100% with everything u said!


**and don't get married just because someone thinks is the idea of the perfect life.
life is not perfect!!

Well-said!



Keshi.