Friday, February 29

Askophobia

Facing The Demon

I know we all suffer from many phobias, from the fear of creepy-crawlies to crossing the road. Go here for a complete list of bizzare phobias (I suffer from alot of them, including the fear of Phobias itself which btw may not be in that list hehehe). Anyways the most annoying phobia that I have ever come across is the Fear of Asking and this post is about that fear. Is there a medical term for that, anyone? I'm not sure hence my own terminology for that is Askophobia. You may wonder what I meant by Askophobia. It's pretty self-descriptive but for those who don't understand it, it means not asking a question about something that bothers you in fear of hurting, provoking, annoying, losing or falling out with the other person. Some people are terrified of asking questions from their friends or colleagues or loved-ones just cos they don't want to rock the relationship they have with these people. I say that's being really ignorant and gutless. Ofcourse there is a WAY to ask any question..meaning in a polite and respectful manner. But Asking is the first step towards knowledge and overcoming any hidden misunderstandings. Miscommunication is a big mistake you may be making, and that may wreck the very relationship that you are trying to secure. Words unspoken, questions unasked, feelings untold can be as damaging to a relationship as much as any other reason out there can be. It's like this invisible weight on your relationship that will catch up with you one day and bury the bond for good.


Unveiling The Truth
There are people I know who get very upset whenever I ask them a straightforward question. So I can understand why some people have this Fear of Asking. Here's a real example: I had a very good friend in Blogville...she's a muslim. I once asked her a question about the Hijab...a simple question, something like 'why does a woman have to wear it and not the men?'. Now I respect all religions, beliefs, lifestyles etc as long as they don't harm anyone else. But there are questions that we need to ask each other in order to clear any doubts and make sense of one another - but that doesn't mean we are insulting each others' lifestyles and that doesn't also mean we have to kill each other just cos someone asked these type of questions. Am I wrong? So yeah, this question was one such innocent question. Well guess what...she took offense and wrote a very angry post on her blog and cut all ties with me HUH! I was gobsmacked. Mainly cos she was a good friend too and I believed she was a sensible one who wouldn't take things so personally. It was just a question, for seeking knowledge and understanding on something that I wasn't exposed to. That's all. I didn't mean to insult or upset her, I swear. Cos if I meant something else, I'd have been very rude to her. There was another similar incident between me and another friend...he and I were very good friends. But he has a terrible Ego problem...so like a good little friend, I asked him why he wouldn't put aside his temper and self-obsession atleast for a little while. Guess what...our friendship is no more! Well I can't help that can I. I believe good friends should be able to talk about such things, ask each other questions to clear their doubts, educate one another and still remain friends..what say guys?


Bridging The Gap
So why do people take offense like that? Maybe it's cos they don't have a sensible answer to give or maybe such questions traumatise their ego? Whatever it is that should not stop me from asking questions, should it? Will it generate a fear in me in future? No. As long as I know I'm not hurting anyone, I'm entitled to knowledge and freedom of speech...it's my right. And if the person who's being asked the question is smart enough to handle the question without taking it personally, that would benefit both of us. A good example of that would be a conversation that I had recently with a good friend here...he had a blog post about Sikh men wearing the turban etc...and I had a question about why wear it etc cos I really didn't know the reasons behind it. And I asked him those questions politely and he replied pretty smartly and politely too. i.o.w he didnt take it personally (although he's a Sikh himself) and he handled it pretty decently. No he didn't quit blogging and leave sobbing loudly calling Keshi a racist biyatch LOL! We both gained knowledge from that conversation and we are still good friends, stronger than before. So there you go. If you know what you're doing and you're true to yourself, there's always an answer, and a peaceful way to deal with any question.

So tell me, do you suffer from Askophobia? Have you ever lost a friend or a loved-one cos of you asking them (without being rude ofcourse) something that they didn't like to hear? Are you one of those people who get stroppy (easily offended) when your conscience is under fire? Share your stories please and be as honest as you can, thanks!


offtopic:
My darling friend Mez
(click this link to go there) is sporting a 'Crushes In Blogworld' post right now in her blog. (just informing you so that all the crushes on me will be declared over there for my heart's pleasure to read *bats her eyelashes*). So yeah go there and give Mizz.Mez some support with her post please, thanks! Besides, she says you can leave your 'crush' comments for your 'crushee' in Anonymous form. So there you go, have some fun while you can :). Pour your hearts out to the ones you have a crush on, for life is too short to put anything off. And hey have a good weekend guys!


Current Music: Don't Speak by No Doubt

197 Cranium Signets:

Jim said...

it means not asking a question about something that bothers you in fear of hurting, provoking, annoying, losing or falling out with the other person.

silly fear
I dont fear

I asked u all I wanted to no

r u a virgin
your age


but i got no answers
u gott tellophobia too

Keshi said...

lol Jim nah I dun hv tellophobia...somethings dun HAVE to be answered. And Im saying that to u pretty politely too.

nah its not a fear..it's called Privacy. And I didnt get all stroppy abt it either hehe.

Keshi.

Ekta said...

not a fear darling..insecurity of losing and upsetting people!
and as they say...ask and u shall receive:-)

Keshi said...

hey Ekta!

feeling insecure is a fear to a degree...

yes ur right..ask and u shal receive. Good one!

Keshi.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Different people have different sensibilities. There are people who are easily offended by even the slightest provocation. I think the rule of the thumb is, ask question in a probing and respectful manner. Don't forget to leave yourself with a little space for retreat. Losing friendship is a very expensive cost for asking an irrelevant question. Thanks for the interesting post. God bless you and your loved ones always.

carolinagal said...

I'd definitely ask. Although sometimes, people ask questions even though they already know the answer..I wouldn't do that.

By the way, the background sound here is quite creepy :( I had to mute the sound on my computer coz I have a HUGE phobhia of the creepy-crawlers!! ewwwwww......


Love your blogs by the way. Hey, my fiance' is Aussie!! I love the land down under!! Where in AU are you? (here you go,, i'm asking, but you don't have to answer on this public forum if you don't watn)

Jim said...

when i was young
much younger than today

I loved a girl Clara
but I never told her

she was too beautiful for me
and there was lotta competition

i guess a lotta youngsters here
must feel that way

about Keshi

Keshi said...

tnxx Mel!


yes ask anything in a respectful manner. I did mention that in this post.


** Losing friendship is a very expensive cost for asking an irrelevant question.

wuts 'irrelevant' to u may not be so to me Mel. I mean wut did u mean by that?


Keshi.

wp 2007 said...

Hi Keshi

First, everybody has at least one phobia. My phobias include open heights and stage fright. I love working behind the camera or curtains, but when it comes to being in front of a large audience, I tend to want to pass out.

Questions beget answers; answers beget knowledge; knowledge begets understanding.

Sometimes, it’s the way in which we ask the questions. There are times when we have to slowly lead up to the question, rather than blurt it out. Also, the timing of the question is very important.

The problem lies with written questions. When writing a question it takes a skill to ask kindly and tactfully. The person can’t determine our attitude by seeing our facial expressions and gestures—body language.

Also, there are many cultures, religions, and organizations which have secretive laws and rules. They don’t like people asking questions.

OMG!

I sound like a bloody shrink!

LOL

Have a great weekend.

Bev

Jim said...

another reason is dat they dont no her age

they fear
they might be proposing to a grandmother

Keshi said...

hey Carolinagal WC n ty!

**Although sometimes, people ask questions even though they already know the answer..

I so know that kinda ppl :)


**coz I have a HUGE phobhia of the creepy-crawlers

haha good one girl! me too..so frikkin scared of creepy-crawlies!



Im from Sydney girl. It's in my very public blog-profile too btw LOL!

tnxx for stopping by SYDNAAAY! ;-)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim no one is competing here for my ass like u did for Clara's..so cut the crap.

Keshi.

Jim said...

I can name ten

Margie
steph
Nadine
......

Keshi said...

heyya Bev!

**My phobias include open heights and stage fright

I hv a fear of heights..I'd NEVER sky-dive, even if it's my life that Im trading it for. ooops did I just make a contradiction LOL!

Stage-fright...I used to hv a lil bit of that b4..not anymore. Im such a show-off now..gimme a stage and I'll make ur day! :)


**Questions beget answers; answers beget knowledge; knowledge begets understanding.

I loved wut u said there..SPOT ON!


Very true..the manner, tone and the timing of the question is so very imp.


**They don’t like people asking questions.

mebbe..but that shouldnt stop anyone from asking right? :)


Loved ur comment as usual, hv a good one my shrink!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jimmo!

**they fear
they might be proposing to a grandmother

yeah that too LOL!


Keshi.

Jim said...

Questions beget answers; answers beget knowledge; knowledge begets understanding.

where does wisdom fit in here?
it rquires wisdom to ask the right questions

and timing is important too

Keshi said...

Jim I agree..wisdom n alot of courage too.

Keshi.

Jim said...

I suggest

never propose to a girl
when she is just divorced
give her time to mend

never ask a girl if she is virgin
my bro did
he gott hell

i dont no for sure about age
but for me age dont count

i love older women

Whitesnake said...

I am actually going to do a post on this.....
It is an all to common problem.

I have it

Bugga aye!

Keshi said...

yeah Jim then there r NEVER-ASKs too :)

good one!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Stevo thats good to hear.

Yes, the reason behind alot of problems today is Askophobia and even Tellophobia - that means, when asked a qn politely too, getting provoked n taking it all too personally.


Keshi.

Aphrodite said...

wohoo yet another really noiice post gal....nd yes i have actually im in a situtaion like tht rite now....suffering from askofobia....have a crush on someone..but not discussing it for fear of loosing a friend...:( but its always on my mind...damn!!!

Keshi said...

hey Aphrodite!

**....have a crush on someone..but not discussing it for fear of loosing a friend

u shouldnt hv a fear of declaring Love cos ur 'Aphrodite' right? :)


k jokes apart..I can u'stand ur fear here. I hv been thru that too. Is this person a blogger too? If so, u can use Mez's current post to tell him abt it...and anonymously too :)

if that wudnt work, wait til the time and mind is right to ask.

HUGS!

Keshi.

Aphrodite said...

yep keshi hes on blogger...ill definitely check out this post u ve mentioned...

Jim said...

if Arthur comes here
give him a beeg hugg

he is my newest pal from WUB

Jim said...

that verbal crap is part of my auto bio as narrated to cooksie

it needs formatting though
will do it some day

Sweetstickychewy said...

Hello Keshi.:)

I guess at times we need people who dare to ask a difficult question that disturbs at times. I feel it brings about a new realisation. but yes i have to agree that it is more positive and encouraging when they come off a lighter and gentler note than a screamo note.

*** But Asking is the first step towards knowledge and overcoming any hidden misunderstandings.

I've got to agree with that. The horse's mouth is always the best.

I guess provokation can be a gd thing yet a bad thing at the same time. Not everyone is as applicable as some.

Have a good weekend sweets.;)

Keshi said...

k Aphrodite!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim ok.

How old is Arthur? ard David Bekcham's age? In that case I'll hug him 200 times.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

k Jimmo!

Keshi.

Jim said...

this is a good post to tell all
do u no that i gott a tattoo on my left bum


it reads Doris
she took my cherry

Jay said...

I've never really worried so much about somebody getting mad at me for asking a question. I figure if they're super sensitive and take everything personally I'm not gonna be around them much anyway. I do worry about looking like a dumbass when I ask a question though. LOL ;-)

Keshi said...

hey Amy!

**I feel it brings about a new realisation.

definitely! It's like a closed-door of yourself suddenly gets opened.



**I guess provokation can be a gd thing yet a bad thing at the same time. Not everyone is as applicable as some.

spot on babe!


u hv a good one too HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim ur left bum is HIDDEN underneat ur clothes...so wuts the point. U still suffer from Askophobia and Tellophobia. LOL!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

** I do worry about looking like a dumbass when I ask a question though

hahaha Jay me too!


Keshi.

Vik said...

In chinese there is a proverb - The most stupid question was the one that was never asked.

But each have their own ways of handling it and facing it. For me it has always been the heights. Yet, I have been in the tallest buildings in the world, Sears, WTC, Chrysler, Empire state and the CNN building in Toronto(Oh, it ended up being a pat-on-my-back-side post, that was not the intent), well everytime I used to go to the corner and peep out I used to freeze and just shake.. LOL

I always wanted to undo the fear by doing what I feared but it never worked... I think tellophobia sounds cool [:D]

BUMBLE!!! said...

Sometimes, I wonder if I fear success...

I'm weird.

Sorry.

Keshi said...

hey Vikz tnxx!

**The most stupid question was the one that was never asked.

so true!


So u suffer from Acrophobia :)


**I always wanted to undo the fear by doing what I feared but it never worked

I u'stand that, cos nothing I do is ever gonna kill my fear of roaches!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Bumble!

**Sometimes, I wonder if I fear success

hmm interesting..now why wud u fear it?


btw d u suffer from Askophobia? And is that why u suffer from Successophobia? :)


Keshi.

BUMBLE!!! said...

I would say I have askophobia too, but successaphobia is a whole different beast.

It's more not being comfortable with the expectations and good things that go with truly winning.

Then again, it's not purposely creating drama - it's more a mix of that ADHD procrastination and inaction and the scariness of what happens to win big.

Like I said, I'm weird.

Shiv said...

I fear abt fears...[:(]

how have u been keshi..long time

maverick said...


Whatever it is that should not stop me from asking questions, should it? Will it generate a fear in me in future? No. As long as I know I'm not hurting anyone, I'm entitled to knowledge and freedom of speech...it's my right.


just a few pointers

1) the way u ask may or maynot be perceived in a similar manner by the other person...so the problem may start...

2) sometimes one has to take extra efforts in framing the words for questions tht might be sensitve to someone...i m used to most type of question framing words n techniques so i knw i dont take them personally :D

have i lost a friend or loved one..i dont knw..cant think of it in the recent past :)


We both gained knowledge from that conversation and we are still good friends, stronger than before


what knowlegdge are we talkin abt here :D

afternoon..howdy??

Amit said...

Hey dude..! why u worry..?!

I've read 2 more post earlier, ofcourse of your friends, and they clearly mentioned that they hv tellofobia. They even said they'd lost a great friend coz of that fear.

so u dun worry..u dun hv any problem..

just spk to them, they r waiting for u..

happy go lucky weekend...friend..!

Jim said...

if a man cud mount to heaven
and survey the mighty universe
his admiration of its mighty beauties
wud be much diminished

unless he had someone
to share in his pleasure

- Marcus Cicero

Jim said...

I no
but it has gott me into a lotta trouble

with my lovers

Jim said...

question framing technics


do u love me as much as i love u?
u can ask this question to most anybody and everybody

do u love me
or is that a pistol in your pocket?
thats gotten stale Keshi
dont use that one

if i was the only man in the world
and u the only woman

wud u ....

that suxs

Nadine said...

Growing up I was pretty blunt and asked my friends all kinds of questions...no one disowned me. I'm grateful.

Today I still ask questions, but I use more tact and wisdom and it's always kind. But I don't suffer from Askophobia.

Funny story...8 years ago or so I had my gall bladder removed. The doctor looked very young. I asked, "So doc, have you killed anyone lately?" I mean it's a valid question, right? :)

Ziah said...

Hey Keshikins!:) I guess what makes people exciting and vulnerable at the same time is that we, as we evolve, are a complex cocktail of emotions. And each of us, as we've strode on to adulthood have gradually accumulated our own private Pandora's Box in our heads. Our fears are our daily battlegrounds and interestingly, the casualties are our fragile relationships.

We mundanes battle. Then there are certain enlightened souls - the messiahs, the gurus... who worked out the formula of what it takes to not do this mundane battle. Interestingly, all their formulas from krishna to jesus to osho to chinmayananda bear amazing semblance in the fundamentals. But, I'm digressing. You into theology?

Anand said...

hehehe
U know what i think I shld take some of this fear from u...am the other end..I ask toooo many q's!!!
Anywayz hey long time..hows u been?

pithaly said...

ok, that's it, kesh. You can't hog ALL the magazines. Rolling Stones is mine, and my profile pic reflects it now.

Within the next 48 hours I'd expect you to delete yours.

Or else...you know what Jim said about the weenie thingy, which btw is true though I think I was not yet 10. Nothing more yukky than you nuzzling guy's mugs in your tush LOL!!

Lena said...

i always ask questions, actually a lot of them. serious and silly ones. And most off my friends are used to it, even asking for more every time. They say if i ever will run of questions to ask the earth will stop moving :D
But if i talk to new people and ask them more than 3 questions in a row, most of them get some kind of confusion why at all i am doing that. Then i wonder what is wrong with people if they take my wish to know them better as personal offense. The usual answer to this will be "Ok, since now on, i will never ever ask you a question". And you know what? After that phrase people usually allow to ask more :D

anits said...

I m hvg Agliophobia- Fear of pain haha... hey good post ya! tcare n hv a good weekends gal!

Knatchbulley Hughzscene said...

i have fear of long words that wud be- Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia

@ d post
fear of asking is related to fear hurting others feelings not insecurity or a phobia as such.. we dun want to hurt ppl's feelings.

"Words unspoken, questions unasked, feelings untold can be as damaging to a relationship as much as any other reason out there can be" i totally agree with u on ths one..

Andrew said...

Good post Keshi. It makes me think. I think I do ask questions regardless, but with family and friends and partner, there are things I don't bring up just to keep the peace.

Miladysa said...

Excellent post!

Whatever the question the person who it is addressed to can always decline to answer it.

The key is to ask 'politely' and answer or decline to answer 'politely'.

Anyone who is offended by a polite question has problems.

Cinderella. said...

I so very know this girl.
Its all wither about miscommunication or saying it too straight !
Even staying quite doesnt help..it only damages the relationship...and I have known how that feels.
But how about when people ask you dumb questions right off the bat, totally uncalled for....just to poke you ? I only can ignore such stupidity...but only as long as my anger chooses to stay put.
Anyway, thats a different realm altogether.
Either way, talking is the only way out. Switching off is no answer. While you choose to cut off, the other person is left thinking, what on earth went wrong ?? Maybe it'd help if atleast you let the person know what irked you and why do you wanna keep away.
Great post hun.
Have a great day.




p.s : Btw, I'm joining work next monday. Wish me luck.

anuj said...

well I don't rem ne incidents of breakin up wid neone cause of askophobia .. but I sure know that people are offended by certain questions and it can come unannounced too .. nd u wud think I just intended to ask or joke ..

usually, rather mostly I don't get offended by any of the questions or jokes put at me, and I used to think I had some kinda 'not-sentisitive-at-all' kind of disease .. but thn its ohk .. it ends up good.

and the alarming thing is that people are very stark abt it .. like whn u joke to them (or say questions) they would say 'don't say this that to me .. I dnt like it' .. fine I say 'what about those times mate when you jokes about this that' .. nd thy go like ' you should say that I shudnt say that too' .. Yeah rite mate .. you n I are different.

i guess u shud start writing 'No-Offense' after evry sentence or question :P

cheese

vishesh said...

Cynophobia- Fear of dogs or rabies.
thats what i suffer from...

i know what you mean ya...but onething we should always remember is that people enter and exit,it is left to us to be what we are...it is the way we see ourselves that the world sees us...

if o had ever taken things too seriously then lolz rip....
there are people out there who insult a lot but its left to us to be broad minded...i believe in reason...i don't care if people did something a zillion years back...i care why they did that...

there is no harm in asking...keep asking :P

Nachi said...

ask ask ask whatever you must, without any hesitations whatsoever...for you anything my dear!

:)*Mwuaaah!*

did a sort of yapping post with Ghosty today, now me thinks i would love to do one for you as well...

and yeah, i once asked "why?". the person hates me till date...*sigh*

Jeevan said...

Very true keshi; there is nothing to be an open mind, just clarifying the doubts than hiding to make dishonest to our self, its better to ask. But how longer they carry like us decides the situation after we ask isn’t it. In friendship I have this problem sometimes, that what I hesitate to ask to make knowing each other may distribute our relation. If I feel the replay from them is slow and like not want to share, that make me something I have hurt them and I have experienced that after questioning the people used to avoid telling some reason.

I tell it exist directly from your heart, that beats often in our hearts. Have a nice weekend dear, Hugss:)

Asha said...

I don't have any phobias but like you, I hate asking for favors, asking people to do something for me, asking others to oblige. I feel like I am intruding!!

Great answer for this first commenter Kesh!! There are some things you never tell or ask!! How rude!!!!

Have a great weekend sweetie. You are perfect as you are, don't change!:))

gunj said...

i had askophobia...coz i was scared of loosin the dream world i'd built for myself...but dat just went on messin up mah life...n im glad i overcame it!!
i ask anything i want to nw!!
tw great post!

Helen said...

Sometimes people are just highly defensive, and sometimes there's truly cultural norms that make people take offense to others questioning their cultural practices. I know you have a gentle, gentle heart, Keshi, and don't mean any offense. But it is good practice to privately learn about someone's cultural practices and/or beliefs so you can engage in a learned, caring conversation and not chance stepping on toes. Asking is not bad, but asking the wrong questions can create a rift. Err on the side of respect, my friend and when you ask the right questions, the world will share her secrets.

vEENs said...

Well, Keshi if you get offended by a close friends question and NEVER talk.. i guess you never were friends enough!

I guess I will get angry with a question.. but never will I say.. GTH..I m neva gonna talk to ya!

i did a advt for Mezie on my blog too :D

hhehehe!

I guess itz gonna be fun!!!!

i will dedicate a HINDI song for yu :P.. hehehhe!

Solitaire said...

Your phobia is not a phobia!

A phobia is an irrational fear. Sounds like you have good reasons to have that fear considering all those people who cried WOLF after you asked them innocent questions.

SIGH!

I wish that people who ask questions like

"How old are you?"

"Why are you not married yet?"

"Do you have sex with your boyfriend?"

develop this damn phobia! And I wish I had your friends' atrocious ways of banning them from my life!

bt_crist said...

it depends how, wat d conditon is..

more over..(especially wid me), narrowminded ness is d major prob.

still d people r like frog of d well, n irony is..they simply don want to come out of it...if we want to do something new, or ask them sth weirdo even, .......finish... v r gone..

n for this reason only,,,m suffering a lot in my engg.

Solitaire said...

I tagged you again.
Check out WARM FUZZIES

Ghost Particle said...

most probably they do that because they dont know the whole truth. and when its related to religion or race, they do it wit zeal because they know more people will support them blindly. Humanity at this rate has no hope. future salvation will come.

Arthur said...

Hi Keshi, I'm here by Jim's recommendation. And I read from the top to the bottom.

When I was at school, college, and even university, I had askophobia, but not anymore, not today.

You know, Jim told me you're lonely, is it true?

Then, in the other side I was (and still being) easily-offensive, I mean, since I'm a Leo, and Leos are fire, I fall into the anger. And I feel some questions are offensive for me.

But thanks to Mel, I'm managing to control my temper.

So, if you have a question for me, feel free to ask.

Big greetings, big hugs and big kisses

Sweet Dreams, from the bottom of my Heart:
Arthur

bt_crist said...

hey keshi...
m a new in blogosphere..

these r my blogs...

[http://bhargavtrivedi.blogspot.com/
http://bhargav-trivedi.blogspot.com/
http://perpetual-quest-continues.blogspot.com
http://bhargavtrivedi1.blogspot.com]

if u wish so, plz pay a visit n ve a comment on them. do suggest wat to do, wat not, n all that.

adieu for now.

The Phosgene Kid said...

Ask away. You know I have a crush on you!!!

Jim said...

women have to wear the burkha bcoz they have more to conceal

women are hott
and if u were married to me
i wudnt want u to show cleavage

does that answer your question?

Jim said...

dat guy needs telling
do visit keshi

Solitaire said...

Please beware of bt_christ. He is a whacko who is making my life miserable and may make yours too. Be careful about your pictures.

EmmaK said...

ask me anything you like - I am not easily offended.

I appreciate that you sometimes find it hard to ask questions..but I have never had that problem. It means I have pissed some people off especially when I was young, I think I am a little more diplomatic these days (or at least I like to think I am) :)

tsduff said...

I really like this post Keshi. I love the music as well - your pictures fit the topic poignantly. Yes, I've had friends who became so hurt or upset about something - no more than a misunderstanding but devastating to the relationship because of unspoken words. Being open is difficult, but losing a friend is worse.

Mez said...

Babe there are 2 dedication up there for you already. Come n have a look. U goin places gal ;)

Mez said...

another one just came in

AakASH!!! said...

Heyy babe! sometimes i do display this trait, but let me assure you, if you were here, i would not have been a victimm of askophobia but wd have definitely asked you out. :p

Apart from that i have another curious question too: what is the connect between the post and the pictures of the beautiful derrieres that one can ogle on?

Die Muräne said...

A question might cause a argument... but really good friends always find a way to come back together.

Most arguments I have, I have with my friends and family ;) Maybe just because I know we have a solid base of realationship and it's very okay and good to argue a little from time to time, haha

Keshi said...

hey Bumble tnxx :)

**it's more a mix of that ADHD procrastination and inaction and the scariness of what happens to win big.


u sound like me now!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Hey Shiv Im doin good ta and urself?


Fear of fears..u mean Phobiophobia? :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Yes Mav ur right...everyone at the receiving end dun react in the same way. But can I help that? :)


**what knowlegdge are we talkin abt here

knowledge of ur culture and knowledge of how I see it :)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Amit!

**I've read 2 more post earlier, ofcourse of your friends, and they clearly mentioned that they hv tellofobia. They even said they'd lost a great friend coz of that fear

who r u referring to?


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim ur qns r pathetic lol!

Besides, I think u suffer from Silentophobia..meaning u cant keep quite for 2 secs...u ask too many qns.


:)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

**QUIET

I mean :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

yhey Nadine Im glad u've got guts :)

**"So doc, have you killed anyone lately?"

LOL haha that one cracked me up!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

ok gtg will be bak laterz to answer the rest of the comments.

tnxx guys!

Keshi.

@purV said...

askophobia.. answerophobia.. whateverophobia.. more than anything else, its quite incredible how u think of such stuff!

Dalicia said...

it depends on the person. my co-workers some gets angry when you ask them personal questions. "how do you know that" if you're not sure you have to ask. esp when it comes to financial matters.

bt_crist said...

no doubt, u r too poised, in choosing ur pics.

tell me, i've writo phobia...wat to do?

Jim said...

Keshi and I
and I and keshi

we have had good times
and bad times
bcoz of my beeg mouth


but then

friends are like bums... no matter how much shit passes between them.. they always stay together... but then somethings are ass ripping..!!

of friendz and lovers (header)

Jim said...

EmmaK

do u kiss on the first date?
how far can I go on the second

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

hahaha! I love asking questions and am not at all ashamed or scared to go on and seek info to enrich my general knowledge (which is declining every second! lol)

Well yeah it all depends on the right situation though.
But its always nice to be polite and ask in an "inquisitive tone".
My way of doing it is "Am just curious to know .. why do you_____? You don't have to tell!"
People normally take it in a right spirit and so far, thankfully and hopefully, I haven't offended anyone!
Plus just to save ur arse, always add the two words "No offence" at the end of everything you think could be offensive to the other person! lol

Mez said...

Dedication by ghost particle and Helen for you..come check!

david santos said...

Really beautifuk!
Thanks, Keshi!

Simply Curious said...

Hey Keshi. Sorry it's been a minute since I've stopped by. Just a note to say, hello. I enjoyed the post. Especially the segment about fears. I am CHALKED full of irrational fears. Really. I should make a list of them one of these days. I'm also SUPER clumsy. I'm constantly tripping and falling or missing stairs and falling, or stumbling, dropping things, running into poles... At family gatherings, they don't even let me carry things to the table.

Keshi said...

hey Ziah I love that Keshikins :) very cute!


**as we evolve, are a complex cocktail of emotions

I so agree on that one. Its hard to u'stand the human mind, that too someone else's.


u can say Im into theology..cos I do hv alot of qns on my mimd abt it.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Anand I said I DONT suffer from this fear. :)

tnxx anyways!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyy Pithaly ur lookin gooooood WOW! Nice work mate ;-)

**Nothing more yukky than you nuzzling guy's mugs in your tush

lol wut exactly d u mean???


Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww Lena u sound so cute!

**They say if i ever will run of questions to ask the earth will stop moving

LOL good on ya girl!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Anits!

I shouldnt be suffering from the fear of pain..cos I've had alot of that in my life :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Knatch!

**fear of asking is related to fear hurting others feelings not insecurity or a phobia as such.. we dun want to hurt ppl's feelings.

yes I u'stand that but I didnt say to ask qns that hurt ppl right? :) Ofcourse there's a way to ask and also a time to ask. Besides some qns dun need to be asked at all, I agree.


Keshi.

Jim said...

Oh Lord
Keshi is here

Keshi said...

hey Andrew

**there are things I don't bring up just to keep the peace.

yes I agree, I do that too. sometimes it's just not worth the drama. :)

Keshi.

Jim said...

Oh Lord
Keshi is here

Keshi said...

ty Milady!

**Whatever the question the person who it is addressed to can always decline to answer it.
The key is to ask 'politely' and answer or decline to answer 'politely'


u nailed it Thats excatly wut I meant.


HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Cinderella tnxx hun and I agree.

**But how about when people ask you dumb questions right off the bat, totally uncalled for....

I so know such ppl, tell me abt it! To such ppl u r allowed to be rude..cos they were rude inthe first place.


HUGS!

Keshi.

Jim said...

keshi has a 100 questions to answer
thank God I am not so popular

Keshi said...

heyya Anuj aww..I so know ya..ur a GENTLEMAN.


**usually, rather mostly I don't get offended by any of the questions or jokes put at me, and I used to think I had some kinda 'not-sentisitive-at-all' kind of disease

it's not that ur insenstiive...it's that u r so polite and so at peace with urself that no one affects ya. I like that alot abt ya. :)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

I agree Vish..

so u hva a fear of Rabies...hmmm..Im scared of barking myself LOL!


**there is no harm in asking...keep asking

tnxx mate! :)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Nachi that was hot..MWAHHHHH! ;-)

Asked Why and u lost a friend? hmmm thats wut I meant. Some ppl r too arrogant.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

tnxx Jeevan!

If they avoid u in fear of being asked qns, then they hv a problem..not u. Always rem that. :)

HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Asha!

**I hate asking for favors, asking people to do something for me, asking others to oblige. I feel like I am intruding

I so know that hun! I never ask for 'favors'...only for a lil bit of 'help'..that too very rarely.


HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Good on ya Gunj! :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

yesI aso agree Helen, tnxx hun!

**Asking is not bad, but asking the wrong questions can create a rift

so true...some qns r not worth the hassle of losing ppl.


HUGS I loved ur Crush dedication to me WOOHOO! UR LOVELY HELEN!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyy Veenz tnxx hun MWAH! A Hindi song, wow I cant wait! :):)

There's a dedication for u there already..I saw it..ooh lala who's that ha? ;-)


**I guess I will get angry with a question.. but never will I say.. GTH..I m neva gonna talk to ya!

I agree.


tnxx hun!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hehe Solitaire true...

*"How old are you?"
"Why are you not married yet?"
"Do you have sex with your boyfriend?"



OMG I know such ppl...I hate those qns. Why be so inquisitive ha!


HUGS n tnxx!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

BT I agree..some ppl r like frogs in the well...teh moment their comfort zone is under fire, they get all stroppy.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

I agree Ghotsy..it sux tho.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Arthur WC n tnxx!

**And I feel some questions are offensive for me.

o I know..some qns can be offensive. thats why I said that there is a way to ask..and also, some qns need not be asked at all.


:)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

BT ok I'll check em out :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

lol Phoso really? aww..

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim ur a sexist.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Solitaire is that so? o...tnxx!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Emma darling I was saying that DONT hv that problem too :)

tnxx hun!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

will be bak later for the rest of the comments.

Keshi.

La vida Loca said...

I have askophobia too :)
Guess I have company

Keshi said...

heyya Terry tnxx for appreciating my posts, pics as well as music. Atleast few ppl here r noticing the pics along with the post...thats great to know :)


**no more than a misunderstanding but devastating to the relationship because of unspoken words. Being open is difficult, but losing a friend is worse.

so true! That has happened to me too..but Im glad I hv few friends who I can really be myself with.

HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Mex tnxx hun! I really really love that post of ur's....it has me smitten all wknd ;-)

HUGS babez!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Aakash tnxx mate!

**if you were here, i would not have been a victimm of askophobia but wd have definitely asked you out

aww u serious? I'd hv loved to say YES ;-)


pics and post? which pic? :) The 2 girls facing each other? Well that means facing the qns and answers..d u get it? :)

tnxx Aakash HUGS! I missed ya.


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Murane thats right..but really good friends always find a way to come back together. So true.

btw I'd love to argue with ya..and then make up ;-)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Apurv tnxx!

**its quite incredible how u think of such stuff!

why is it so incredible hehe. Arent these things we all face in life and think abt too? :)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Dalicia!

**my co-workers some gets angry when you ask them personal questions

depends on how personal the qn was and also it depends alot on the person and the relationhsip u hv with him/her.

ofcourse I dun go asking my boss how he kisses his wife LOL!


Keshi.

KP! said...

well keshi...u know u have good heart and when u ask question...u dont mean it in a bad way. Sometimes people take it in wrong way. only thing u can do is clarify the confusion my friend, other than that...not much u can do! sorry u lost friend by asking a question.

U can ask me anything...will respond....:). we have love/hate(only when it comes to cricket) relation ship....lolz.

enjoi the weekend!

an hour away from the first final!!

have good one!

Keshi said...

BT u dun hv Writophobia lol!

I think u hv Blogophobia? It happens to alot of bloggers every now n then hehe. ;-)


Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Jim!

**friends are like bums... no matter how much shit passes between them.. they always stay together

LOL omg thats so yukz but pretty true!

u btw hv pissed me off my limits sometimes...but somehow I tend to hv a special corner for ya in my heart. Gotta ask God why LOL!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim no way Emma's gonna kiss ya so chill.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Cheesy some great tips there hun. I love ur comment.


**My way of doing it is "Am just curious to know .. why do you_____? You don't have to tell!"


thats a very classy n neat way to ask a qn. no one can get angry with that.


**no offense

yep thats another neat trick, even when u mean offense LOL!

HUGS smarty!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Mez Im in Love land right now..cos of ur post and all the dedications I received.

Every hour of the wknd Im spending with each of my many lovers..lol tnxx hun U ROCK!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

tnxx Dave!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey SC :)

**. I'm constantly tripping and falling or missing stairs and falling, or stumbling, dropping things, running into pole

haha really? Im clumsy too..u can say that LOL!


HUGS!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim where else wud I be..this is my blog btw. LOL!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

LaVida I dun hv it..I was just telling ppl to get rid of Askophobia :)

tnxx!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

KP tnxx!

lol I know..when it comes to Cricket we will fight n fight but yes we make up too. HUGS!

I lost 2 blogger friends after that Cricket post...did u know? :)

Keshi.

Jim said...

Around the corner I have
a friend,
In this great city
that has no end,

Yet the days go by
and weeks rush on,
And before I know
it, a year is gone.

And I never see my
old friends face,
For life is a swift
and terrible race,

He knows I like him
just as well,
As in the days when
I rang his bell.
And he rang mine if,
we were younger then,
And now we are busy,
tired men.

Tired of playing a
foolish game,
Tired of trying to
make a name.

"Tomorrow" I say! "I
will call on Jim"
"Just to show that
I'm thinking of him."

But tomorrow comes
and tomorrow goes,
And distance between
us grows and grows.

Around the corner!
yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram
sir" "Jim died today."

And that's what we
get and deserve in the
end.

Around the corner, a
vanished friend.
Remember to always say what you mean.

If you love or like
someone, tell them.
Don't be afraid to express yourself. Reach out and
tell someone what they mean to you.

Because when
you decide that it
is the right time it might be too late.

Seize the day. Never have regrets. And most
importantly, stay
close to your friends and family, for they have
helped make you
the person that you are today.

You must send this on in 3 hours after reading
the letter
to 10 different people.
If you do this, you will receive unbelievably good
luck in love n life.

The person that you are most attracted to will
soon
return your feelings.

@purV said...

hmm.. may be i don't give too much thought to it.. so I'll still hold up the incredibility tag for u..

Jim said...

whats stroppy?

Jim said...

I lost SOUTHY
bcoz I wash dirty linen in public

he hates me for telling all about India and Indians

where is he?

Jim said...

Keshi

i wudnt bug u so much
if u link me

u have a google pr of 5
i think

Jim said...

Close WindowResults Displayed As Below
http://keshigirl.blogspot.com/Website
4PageRank
939,053Alexa Rank
886Google Results
0Yahoo! Results
0MSN Results
14,800AltaVista Results
12,500AllTheWeb Results

sorry its 4
STEPH is more desirable
she gott 4

Helen said...

Aaaawww, I love you, too, Keshi, I thought that was you!!! You're wonderful!

Tys on Ice said...

bang on! I feel for you...unlike your polite questions, mine tend to border on tactlessness...being born with a foot in the mouth dosent help either..

but i do understand wht u mean...i hate having to walk on eggshells arnd people whose 'feelings' i mite unwittingly hurt...its tiresome and hardwork...moreover like u said, its people who hve no clue or wear blinders that hve a problem with giving a straight answer to a straight question without bringing their emotions and their insecurities into the picture...

so, to answer ur question : pls continue asking...we got here so far becoz of our questioning...without our questioning we wud still be in our caves skinning an animal and writing blogs on the walls ...

pretty dreary ....

maverick said...

hey..howdy??howz the weekend goin on?

Keshi said...

Jim d u live in my blog? LOL!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

Apurv :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hehe Helen u guessed that right ;-)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Good on ya Tys! Dun ever change :)


**we got here so far becoz of our questioning...without our questioning we wud still be in our caves skinning an animal and writing blogs on the walls

so true hehehe.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Mav not bad at all tnxx and ur's?

I was watching the India/Aus first finals...:)

Keshi.

Mez said...

am sure u will love the current
sonmg playin on my blog. lil cheesy :)

Prats said...

**But there are questions that we need to ask each other in order to clear any doubts and make sense of one another - ........**

Brilliantly said , Kesh..
If those questions are left unanswered, it may lead to a lot of misconceptions, which may in turn lead to negative ideals and half baked truths going astray....the root cause of a lot of problems around us...

You were bang on there...
and yes, it is tough to get oneself to come out and ask that question, but when the answer is given, the satisfaction negates the fear....

Amit said...

Those 2 friends who have stopped talking to you...hehehe..

(the muslim girl and the friend who had lots of ego..!)

Well, they have a problem and not u..

tqmcintl said...

I like coming to your blog Keshi
Yes, I camp here

its bcoz all my pals and gals visit here

I dont have to visit them individually

saves time
besides u gott pr 4
by posting here

my pr goes up too

tqmcintl said...

another reason is that I am bekar
I dont get much work nowadays

I dont chase work no more
i got dollar dreams

I am worth much more than 50 dollars per day

I might land up in Sydney too
and meet up with VEST too

VEST loves me and RM
do u no ?
VEST is stinking rich
Yes he stinks
and he is rich

Cazzie!!! said...

I so want those hot pants, gah!!

Jim said...

Vest said...
India beat Australia batting under lights after losing the toss.
By 6 wkts and 4.5 overs to spare.
Well done Sachin Tendulka, who carried his bat through the whole innings, 117 Not Out*.

Oz prima donna batsmen's sloppy batting and fielding was the main cause. being too cocky was the other.
Well played India.

Sunday, 2 March 2008 10:48:00 PM EST

shooting star said...

well...i have never lost any friends till now coz of any phobia!!...maybe coz all my friends are swethearts and very mature and sensible!!!....
and i certainly dotn suffer from askophobia!!!...i ask what i want to ask always!!.....

The Grunt said...

You can ask someone but I've learned to not expect answers all the time. I don't get offended from questions, but I do get uncomfortable. So, I consider that when I ask or refrain from asking.

I think not asking questions can be a sign of not caring. Being offended by relatively harmless questions shows great insecurity.

Jim said...

I see trees of green, red roses too
I see them bloom for me and you
And I think to myself what a wonderful world.

I see skies of blue and clouds of white
The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night
And I think to myself what a wonderful world.

The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky
Are also on the faces of people going by
I see friends shaking hands saying how do you do
They're really saying I love you.

I hear babies cry, I watch them grow
They'll learn much more than I'll never know

And I think to myself what a wonderful world


Yes I think to myself what a wonderful world.

carolinagal said...

Thanks for your reply girl. BTW, your city is not listed in your profile, just your country.

Also, thanks for visiting my blog;)

G'day mate!

The Phosgene Kid said...

I fear rejection from Keshi...

Keshi said...

MEz I loved it hun tnxx! U hv great taste in Music.

I love Hindi dance numbers!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

heyya Prats tnxx babez!

**it is tough to get oneself to come out and ask that question, but when the answer is given, the satisfaction negates the fear....

Spot on!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

ty Amit!

**the muslim girl and the friend who had lots of ego

d u know who they r? :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hehe TQM tnxx!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Caz I want em in Silver too ooooooo!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Jim yeah I watched the match...good one! Well done India!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

Thats great to know Sushmita :)

Keshi.

Keshi said...

I so agree Grunty..some qns make us uncomfy..so yeah we dont HAVE to ans all qns.

**Being offended by relatively harmless questions shows great insecurity

spot on!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

I love that song Jim!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

G'day Carolinagal! ;-)


I do hv SYDNEY on my profile LOL!

tnxx mayyte!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

aww I wont n cant reject anything Phosoish ;-)

Keshi.

di.di said...

Some people are just more sensitive...

Keshi said...

true Didi...

hey can u tell me who u r? I mean did I know u from a different ID b4? :)

Keshi.

di.di said...

lolz... dd stands for drama div@.. duhhh

Keshi said...

OMG now I rem that profile_pic was so YOURS'! How can I forget!

HUGGGGGGGGZ gal! Not blogging anymore?

Keshi.

Satish Bolla said...

hahaha, a nice post. now, i fear dat am also suffering frm da same phobia. i once went to a muslim colleague's house n asked him is the girl next to him his daughter. he just gave me a glare. then it fell upon me that muslims are entitled to marry more than once....

KP! said...

wow....i cant believe u lost few frenz over....cricket controversy!I cant imagine that...:). I am very passionate abouyt cricket...but i have never lost friend over cricket!!

sorry to hear that...:)

Keshi said...

Satish I didnt say I suffer from this phobia..I said I DONT. :)

Muslim men can hv alot of wives..I know.

Keshi.

Keshi said...

KP rather they lost me...lol!

Keshi.

tqmcintl said...

when I click on your new post
I get dis


The blog you were looking for was not found.


Return to Blogger

ALI said...

i'll raise my hand for that one...

I too suffer from Askophobia

I great losses so far....but I guess I am on the start line and the race is about to begin...

let see how much i loose..... :)

take care

~ali

Keshi said...

TQM mebbe I deleted my blog? LOL!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

hey Ali!

**but I guess I am on the start line and the race is about to begin

Im glad :)


Keshi.

di.di said...

yeap i blog sometimes

Judge Arse said...

I sometimes fear saying anything because people have often taken offense at what I thought was a perfectly innocent comment. In all honesty, I really don't care for conflict. Yet it always seems to find me.

Keshi said...

Diva I cudnt see ur blog link for a long time..I just got access! :(


-----------------------------------

Judge I know some ppl ask/say very offensive things. But wut I meant from this post was asking for information w.o. being rude. I dun think ur rude at all :)


but ofcourse for those who r rude to u, ur allowed to tell em off LOL!

Keshi.